Full Circle
by ChaosLilKat
Summary: Eighth Arrow/SPN Crosover. Dean POV still. Picking up where Monsters in Our Heads ended. When old threats combine with unheard of threats and the monsters start acting like organized crime syndicates the Boys have to reach out to the experts in taking down mobs and drug lords. Team Arrow.
1. Chapter 1

We were curled up. She was behind me, her arm was laying over my chest and I was pretty sure if she'd been capable of it she'd be purring. So would I if I could. As much as I really wanted to lie there all day and ignore the world we had things to do. "How long has it been since you oiled and cleaned those guns?" Hunter pillow talk, so romantic.

"I've been bad about it," She confessed, "Been about a year and a half."

I was kind of curious why she hadn't told me about her stash, "Why didn't you tell me you had them?"

She moved away from me and I rolled over to look at her. She seemed oddly hesitant to answer at first, "Because of what I saw through our connection when you had the Mark," she kind of looked ashamed actually, "I, well to be honest, I was scared. When you first moved in, I wasn't sure if you somehow would try to act out those dreams in your sleep, be drawn to the weapons for some reason, so I decided the less you knew the better. After that you seemed so intent on quitting and having nothing to do with hunting I didn't see a reason to bring it up."

"Don't blame you. Sam went months without sleeping there near the end. I couldn't sleep and would spend hours in the gun range or stabbing at things. He never officially told me but he started sleeping with his door locked and at least one gun in his room." I gave her a quick kiss, "Was probably a good move on your part. Guess that means I've got a couple hours of weapons prep to do before we head out. May as well get to it. I want to give Baby a good once over too. Especially after going all crazy on her."

"Seems fair," she said as she stretched in the most tempting, seductive way possible. "You just gave me a good once over, guess it's her turn."

"I hate you so much right now," I was seriously considering changing my mind about saving the world, again.

She paused mid stretch and blew me a kiss, "Duty calls Babe."

"Yeah, yeah. Stupid monsters." I rolled out of bed and threw on my wrenching clothes.

"I can help with the weapons," she offered, "No need for you to do all of it."

"You should probably get a hold of all your clients, finish what you can and come up with a good cover story. This will probably take longer than a week and who knows where we'll be or what we'll be doing." The last time she'd gone on an extended sort of leave was when she'd been chasing down Leaping Deer, from what I understood she'd managed to stick pretty close to major areas that had decent wifi so she'd been able to work on the road. Monsters tend to like out of the way places, course who knew what they were doing this time around.

"Yeah, I guess I should." I think it started hitting her that she was going after monsters again and everything that could mean. Leaping Deer was the first thing she'd hunted in several years and that was less a hunt and more her protecting her people from a direct threat.

"You all right darlin'?"

The last of the humor she'd shown a few seconds before faded, "I think I need to call Cougar. Prepare him and come up with something to tell everyone else here. They understood when I left to chase down Leaping Deer, this is different and I won't lie to them."

I followed her train of thought and didn't like where it led, because it'd come down to her leaving to help me, help white people. That could be a problem. Most of the folks here had made peace with my existence in the middle of their tribe. I'd kept clear of tribal business and helped out when and where I could, but this would make a lot of them nervous. It would also give ammo to the faction that had never accepted me and by extension her. "This is going to get dicey isn't it?"

"Indeed," Shaman Running Coyote was starting to assert herself, I knew when to step back.

"You do what you have to, let me know what I can do. One thing though."

"Yes." She was all business.

"If there's going to be a meeting, I'm coming." Her eyes narrowed, "Hear me out. You know who this is going to piss off and what they're liable to say. I've stood by until now because this is your world, I respect that and I've done everything I can to blend in and not offend people. I wanted to keep them from having anything to use against you since I wasn't interfereing with your job. Now though? You know as well as I do that this will get personal fast. They're going to use us to try to get to you and that I won't allow. We can't explain to them what hunting is and what's going on in a way they'll understand so I will be there to back you because you're going to need it." I thought I caught a low growl coming from her, she looked cranky enough to be growling anyway.

"I take it I don't have a choice here?" She asked.

"Nope." She didn't have a lot of room to talk since she'd pretty much just pulled the same thing on me when she declared she was hunting with me no matter what.

"Fine." Once her legs hit the ground and she started to stand up her mood shifted, I saw her shoulders relax a bit. "Thank you, for standing down as long as you have. I know it's pissed you off plenty of times."

I shrugged, "Wasn't here to fight. After all the shit I've gone through, some idiots muttering crap about me under their breath as I walk by doesn't get to me that much. Besides, you'd ended up fixing whoever I hit and I didn't think it'd be polite to give you extra work."

She laughed, it was short and laced with contempt, not towards me but towards the idiots, "Good point." She headed into the bathroom to get dressed and whatever. I walked out and went towards her Sacred Space, I had work to do.

I stopped before entering it. Now that I wasn't all hopped up on desire to wrap her up in my arms, which was probably a bit disrespectful to the space but she hadn't seemed upset about it, I took a minute to do something I hadn't done in years. "Hey, um Coyote's guides? I know I'm not exactly one of your tribe but you've hung out with me a few times so, well, we're heading into some sketchy shit and you seem to care a lot more about her and us than the god who's supposed to watch over me. So, I just wanted to ask, please, any help you can pass along would be greatly appreciated. Thanks." And, once again, her guides proved themselves a lot more interested in helping than any angel with the exception of Cas had ever been. I felt a warm breeze brush against my face and caught a flicker of something small and furry sitting in front of me for a split second, then it was gone. "Nice to know you're on our side." I figured after that I didn't have much of a chance of corrupting the room, so I walked in, picked up a few guns and headed downstairs to start fieldstripping them.

My weapons cleaning gear was always packed in my bags when I'd hunted so I'd had it with me ever since I'd moved in. I'd ended up storing it in a closet in the garage. I had no reason to have it near by since I wasn't firing my gun that much anymore, at least compared to how much I'd used it before. Field stripping guns had been one way I'd de-stressed back in the day, which is kind of ironic when you think about it. I guess it's like when women crochet or knit, which is a pretty horrible analogy, but it's the same type of activity. It's repetitive, keeps your hands busy and you can kind of zone out doing it. There weren't a whole hell of a lot of other options when you're on the road twenty four/seven and I'd tried just about all of them. If nothing else it was probably one of the healthier ones.

I set the guns down on the kitchen table on the way out to the garage, dug out the kit, went back in and settled down at the table. She had two rifles, three nine mils, two forty fives, a twenty two and a sawed off shotgun. I'd brought down most of the handguns and started in on one of the nine mils when she came down the staiirs.

She was on the phone, "Yeah, if you can come over as soon as possible that'd help." She paused and frowned, "No, I'm not leaving today. Yes, I know how this looks, not much I can do about that. Thanks." She hung up, took a deep breath, let it out and went to her desk.

That didn't look good, "Cougar?"

"Yes. He'll be here in about fifteen minutes. He's not happy, not mad, but not happy."

"Ah, okay." Cougar, Coyote and I had an odd relationship. After he'd gotten over the whole wanting to beat me into a bloody pulp for giving her nightmares I'd hoped that he and I would work things out. We hadn't, he didn't hate me, but I would never be on his Christmas card list. At first I thought there was some wierd jealousy going on, then I found out Cougar wasn't interested in her like that. Turns out he was gay, so that wasn't the problem. I'd tried to get Coyote to fill me in on what she thought was causing the problem, she never gave me a straight answer, which was weird for her. A few months back I finally asked him. He said it wasn't so much me personally he had an issue with, he thought overall I was a good guy, it was that my entire existence in her life and what I represented was a constant source of tension in the tribe and he'd run a lot of interference for her over the years.

She was like a sister to him and he'd take a bullet for her in a heartbeat. His childhood had sucked; her and her family had sort of taken him in, watched over him. Even after she left to go to school they'd stayed as close as possible, he'd even taken on people that said anything negative about her while she halfway across the country. Then she got into hunting, which he'd never approved of; then met me, which he approved of even less and now I was living with her, which, unknown to me, had caused a huge rift. She already knew how he felt so he hadn't rehashed old territory by starting more fights but he'd kept his distance from us.

After I found all that out I understood why she dodged the question. If she'd told me early on that I was coming between her and her best friend I might have left and not given us a fair shot. By the time I'd found all this out I was far past the point where I was going to let that be an issue if it wasn't one for her, but, since I was on an honesty kick I told her that I'd talked to Cougar and what he'd said. We'd been sitting on the porch, having our after dinner drinks. She waited until I finished talking, took a drink of her wine and stared out into the night for a long ass minute.

"He used to get bullied because he was gay, at least until he grew bigger than everyone else here," she said, "I beat the hell out of so many kids growing up because of that. Got my ass kicked a fair amount of times too. My parents protected him as best as they could, so did Rising Dove. He has to meet guys off Res land because there's not a lot of options here. Rising Dove's generation were okay with who he was, it was the younger generation that was taking out their frustration on anyone they could. Anyway, when I decided to leave and started getting crap for it, he said it was my turn to be protected by him. After I saw the vamp and got into the life, he was the only one that knew what I was really doing. I lied to everyone else. When I went to school he saw it as something worthy because I could use when I learned to help our people. To him hunting was me turning my back, not only on the tribe but him and my parents. That I was dishonoring them by throwing away my skills and gifts. When I came back after my father died, he thought that meant I was getting back on the right path. Then I told him about you, about our hookups, all of it. I was missing you bad one night and drank too much. I don't remember much from that night, but I do remember the next morning." She stopped, took another drink and shifted her gaze to me, "He told me that he knew what it was like to be torn into two directions and that I could not be a true Shaman if I cared more for someone in another world than I did for the tribe. I told him that the tribe was my world now, I had ignored them for long enough. His reply was that I had just lied to him and myself, that I was using the tribe and the position of Shaman to escape from the pain of losing my father and not being with you. I told him to shut the hell up. He left and we never talked about it again, our relationship wasn't the same after that." She finished off her wine in one long swallow, didn't say another word and left.

I chose to let the topic drop after that. I didn't push to spend time with Cougar, he avoided me and Coyote was caught somewhere in the middle of it. Now this whole mess was going to bring all of that back up again and I wasn't too sure where Cougar would stand. This might push him past what even he was willing to go to the mat for. I know how complicated things get when someone you loved was doing crap you didn't approve of, I just hoped they'd still have some sort of relationship at the end of it all.


	2. Winds of Change

Coyote sat down and started working on something or other on her computer, I finished up the first gun and was taking the second one apart when Cougar walked in.

"Hey." I said as soon as I heard the door open.

"Dean," was his reply. I glanced over at Coyote before looking at him, her shoulders were tight which wasn't a good sign at all. When I looked at him I was again reminded of how damn intimidating that man can be. I do a pretty good job at blanking out my face when shit's about ready to hit the fan, or so I've been told, Coyote can too, but Cougar brings whole new meaning to the description stoney faced. There was nothing on his face, I couldn't even read his eyes which always bothered the hell out of me. I couldn't tell if he was pissed, bored or what.

She finished typing and turned to face him. I may not be able to read him but she could. Her I can read, and what I saw I didn't like. "What is it?" She asked. I felt like I'd missed half a conversation and neither of them had said anything yet.

He sat down on the couch glanced at me, then focused on her. "Let me make sure I have this correct. You two, based on very minimal information, are assuming that the monsters are somehow forming alliances and going after hunters. You are then assuming that even though you, Dean and you Shaman Coyote, haven't hunted in quite some time that your presence is required to somehow save every hunter on the planet, and because of this choice Shaman, you have decided to leave us for an unknown length of time and possibly get killed. Is that an accurate description of the situation?"

Not good, he was using her title.

"They have turned a hunter, threatened another and are acting completely out of character," she stated.

"So you have been told Shaman, this hunter being turned. There is no verification."

There was absolutely no emotion in his voice at all.

"Sam is getting verification but either way if the hunter was not changed and someone is faking it or if the hunter was changed the monsters are turning into aggressors in ways they haven't before."

He barely nodded, I was getting the feeling that this was some sort of test or practice run but I had no idea for what or why.

"And how is that such a threat to us that you must leave?"

"If it wasn't for hunters, we would not have that truck stop. If they are destroyed we will not be able to finish that project, which many of our future plans and projects to better our situation are based on. We need them, they have helped us for no pay or reward. They are doing this because of the respect they have for Dean. Should we abandon them when they need us? Should I? I am the person that persuaded Dean to call them and ask for help. How is it honorable to ask for aid then not give it in return?"

"Your choice to leave then, it is in the best interest of the tribe and not because you wish to," his eyes locked on to me, "follow him."

Oh hell.

Coyote didn't flinch, "Yes, that is correct. I must leave to help the tribe."

"And you wish to leave me in charge in your absence."

"Yes. You have been at the side of both Rising Dove and I, you are more than capable of guiding the tribe in the meantime."

Silence took over. I'd long since stopped working on the guns. There was a tension I couldn't describe going on between them and it just got thicker and thicker the longer neither of them spoke. They just stared at each other, as still as stones. Cougar gave ground first, his eyes lowered. "I will stand with you, because of the reasons you stated, but.." his eyes met mine again, "they will all sense the real reasons Coyote, just as I do. Yes, he may have brought the hunters to us, but he will be the reason we lose you in the end."

He reached into his back pocket and pulled out a sealed envelope, "Before Rising Dove passed away, he gave this to me. Told me it was for you and I would know when you would need to see it. I have not read it, but when you called I remembered it and I felt him." He crossed the room and handed it to her. I've never seen her move so slow to take something from someone, she was in shock and she wasn't the only one.

Once he'd delivered it to her he took a step towards me, I debated getting up but he stopped. "Dean, I want to thank you for all the help you've given us. If Coyote was not in the position she is in, her comings and goings, her relationship with you would be less of an issue for all of us. You see how things stand with us, how few of us are left, how little we have. To have a Shaman with her strength and abilities be in love with a white man with your background and list of enemies, it's like salt in a wound that never heals. You have always known your history would catch up to you, and you living here, it puts all of us at risk. Not just physcially but culturally. If she dies, we have no one else with her talents here. She knows this, yet she chooses you still."

"Cougar, I told her to stay, I swear."

He nodded, "I know, but she will never abandon you." He turned his back on both of us, "I will tell the rest to meet at the community center. Be there in an hour Shaman. Perhaps between now and then you will be able to admit the truth about how important this tribe, these people, really are to you." Even though he shut the door softly on his way out it was still the loudest noise in the room. I sure as hell hadn't expected any of that and judging from how much her hands were shaking as she numbly stared at the letter, she hadn't either.

"Sweetheart?" How clean the guns were mattered a whole lot less than it had five minutes ago. I was out of the chair and kneeling next to her in about thirty seconds.

"I..." She was speechless, which pretty much never happens. Tears were starting to well up in her eyes as she fumbled with opening the envelope. She finally managed to get the letter out and start reading it. I chose not to read over her shoulder, she'd tell me when she was ready to. I just watched her face. She already had shock covered before she'd opened it, as her eyes moved left to right I saw guilt, loss and way too much old pain fly across her face. Whatever Rising Dove said, it was hitting her in the places she'd least expected it to. "Oh...no...he's right..." her mouth dropped wide open, the letter fell from her hands and the tears started falling.

"Hey, come here," I reached out to hold her but she backed away.

Her eyes were wide and she looked totally lost, "I need to think. Just leave me alone for a while, please."

"Uh..."

Before I even got a chance to say okay she was out the back door and moving fast across the yard into the open plains behind the house. She hadn't told me I couldn't read it so I picked the letter up and sat in her chair as I started to read.

"Coyote,

I had a vision yesterday, a vision that has caused me a great deal of sorrow. I know you often complain of how vague visions are and I always tell you that they are that way because the Spirits know we cannot handle the great truths they can share with us. How I wish this vision was vague and, as you often say, pointless. But it was not. I know now that I will be seeing my ancestors soon, much sooner than I would wish to. There is so much more I wish to teach you, I need to teach you, but I can't, which is why I think the Spirits chose to be blunt with me.

I have so much to say and no idea how to say it, for an author I find myself oddly lacking in the ability to find the words I wish to use. You have always had such great gifts, you're so much your father's child in that respect, but you are also your mother's child. Your desire to learn, to grow, to leave the Reservation and explore everything in the world, that was all your mother. And, like your mother I fear it will take you from us.

It pained your father greatly, far greater than he ever expressed to you, when you chose to go to college instead of study with me. He would never hold you back but he knew that you would bury your gifts once you moved among the world of machines and money, you would have to to succeed. He was proud of you, never doubt that. We would always celebrate your achievements when we learned of them, but he still wished that you would return at some point. As the times between your visits lengthened he knew that you had fallen prey to that world, but what could he do? Condemn his own daughter for her success? Her ambition? No. He would never do that.

Then came the day you told us that you were choosing to "freelance" as you called it. We all were worried at first, but we weren't certain that something was truly wrong until you came to visit after that. You had changed, you were rougher, colder, your energy was more that of a warrior, he and I could both tell that something had reawakened your gifts. Yet you lied to us, you hid what you'd become from all of us, all of us but one. He did not tell us, don't be angry at him, but did you really think you could hide what you were doing from two Shamans? Great Coyote and Crow both sent us visions of you, your father had dreams of what you were experiencing, just as you dreamt of his death.

We didn't understand why at first. We are Shamans, we know that supernatural things exist, you know this. We spent hours trying to figure it out. You had always told your father everything before, yet you did not speak of this. The longer it went on the more we realized that the reason you'd kept it from us was because that you enjoyed it, perhaps too much. That, on some level you craved the kill, the fact that you were beholden to no one but yourself, that you lived outside all laws. You had escaped from both the white man's world and ours, you were truly free. That was the only thing that made sense to us.

Then one day you came for a visit and I sensed something, some bond that had not been within you before. You'd shared something precious with another. I didn't tell your father because I wasn't certain as to who or why until the demons came and you brought Dean and Sam to us, the minute I laid eyes on Dean I saw the connection between the two of you and I saw how you both denied it. During the Sweat Ceremony it was almost blinding, the ties between the two of you. Yet he left. Then several things became very clear to me.

When your father died, I did all I could to keep you from the suffering I saw in you future. I knew it would tear you apart. When you left to go on a monster killing spree I prayed and hoped that you would return. Thankfully you chose to and I used your guilt at your father's death to guide you towards becoming Shaman. You needed something to focus on, to put all your considerable energies towards. It worked too, at least it did until Dean came back into your world. After the ceremony your attentions became divided, yes you hid it as well as you could but you were worried, because of what we saw. You feared for him. Whenever he would return or you would leave to meet him it would take you days to be able to truly focus again when you got back or he left. You were living in two worlds.

I hoped that it would fade over time but it did not. Which means my impending death and what follows will be that much harder for you. You see my daughter in Spirit, I know you will become Shaman when I pass, I know that you will do great things and I know at some point you will be forced to choose. There will be a moment when you realize the love of your tribe is not as great as your love for him and as Shaman you must be willing to serve the tribe in everything.

So my child, I wish to tell you that when this moment arises to truly study your heart. You can still serve your tribe as something other than Shaman. Being Shaman should not shackle you, should not be something that you feel forced to do. It should be the thing that makes your Spirit sing. If it does not do that, then you are not a Shaman.

Coyote, you are a person of great power and strength. You can help the tribe in many ways, but if you cannot put the needs of the tribe above your own then by being Shaman you ultimately hurt it, not help it.

Who makes your Spirit sing? Is it the eyes of your tribe when you help them or is it his eyes when you are together?

I will always love you, I want nothing but your happiness. Always remember that.

Rising Dove"

It was dated about six months before he passed away.


	3. Choices, Consequences and Committment

I read it a second time, mainly because I was speechless too. I expect angels like Cas to be able to see inside a person's soul, but not a Shaman I'd only met once. I mean, I knew he'd checked out my Warrior Spirit and all that but I never really put much thought into what he had seen beyond the hellhound's marker and that Sam and I were completely screwed up. Everything he said was dead on, not only about me but about her and hunting. We'd talked about it years ago, when hunting was a lot less complicated. We both felt the same way, there's something to be said about living between the cracks of society, off the grid and doing whatever the hell you like. Especially when you're in your twenties and feeling like the world is just waiting for you to do some crazy ass amazing thing. Back then we both got off a lot on the hunt, the adrenaline rush, the feeling of skating past Death one more time and taking out something that few people even knew existed.

A decade or so later, more fights than most people would survive and way too many trips to the after life and back I'd lost a lot of that dumb ass courage. She'd gained her own scars and had taken on a whole new realm of responsibilities while sharing some of mine. A lot had changed but Rising Dove had nailed the one thing that hadn't, how we felt about each other. Cougar's issues with me made a lot more sense, I didn't quite understand all that was involved with being Shaman before now, I'd only ever been responsible for one person, never a whole tribe, and I'd sacrificed everything for him, repeatedly. I wouldn't exactly say that Sam made my Spirit sing but for most of my life he'd been the reason I got out of bed in the morning, the reason I fought so hard, hell, the reason I existed. I never saw him as something that held me back and I know that Coyote really didn't feel that her tribe held her back but, fact was, she was leaving because of me.

If I was just some hunter she was friends with, I know for damn sure she wouldn't be doing this. She'd admitted it to me, but I don't think the true extent of what that meant had hit her. It sure as hell hadn't hit me. I needed to track her down. I set the letter on the table, grabbed some bottles of water and followed her. It wasn't exactly cool outside and between the crying and the pace she'd set if she went too far she was going to need some water at some point. I knew the rough location of some of her spots she tended to go to to think, I just hope she didn't head to her cave. She'd told me about it, I'd never been there but I knew it was a decent hike to get to and she'd usually overnight when she went to it.

Fortunately she'd slowed down by the time I cleared the backyard. I followed along behind her, I didn't talk, I just kept an eye on her. The farther she went, the longer it took her to cover any ground. Her steps grew shakier and I heard her sobs. As much as I wanted to hold her something told me she wasn't ready for that yet. She finally came to a stop and slowly dropped to the ground under a scrubby tree. I joined her, handed her a bottle of water and sat next to her. She'd talk when she was ready. I'd downed about half of my bottle before she said anything.

"Did you read it?"

"Yeah, hope you don't mind."

She shook her head, roughly wiped tears off her cheeks and took a few shaky breaths, "I forgot how accurate he could be."

"I never knew. You think you'll ever be like that?"

A shudder ran through her, "Not sure if I ever want to be. What I see now is bad enough already."

"I can't really imagine what that's like."

"I wish there was a way I could explain it." She was staring aimlessly at her bottle, rubbing the bits of moisture off the side.

"Hey."

She looked at me, I lifted my arm up and slid closer to her. As soon as I got close enough she leaned into me and I put my arm around her shoulders.

"Cougar was right, years ago, when we fought. He knew it, I guess I knew it too, which is why it pissed me off so much. I guess I felt that he was condemning me for loving you. He wasn't, he was just being honest."

"Speaking from experience, honesty can be a lot harder to deal with than people condemning you."

She nestled her head tighter against my chest, "I don't like to think I'm the kind of person that uses others to hide, to run from something, but..."

"Honey listen, running and hiding when you're hurting is something everyone does. Guilt was ripping you to shreds, I know how that feels. You made a much better choice than I did, you threw yourself into helping others, I let mine nearly kill me. Rising Dove knew you needed a place and time to heal, he helped you run and hide, he admitted it, but let's be honest. You weren't hiding, you were healing, dealing. Me, I was hiding. Know how I know the difference?" I felt her head move in a small shake. "Because of how we came out on the other side of it. You're healthier, saner, more stable because of what you chose to do, look at me. I'm less of a wreck now than a year ago, sure, but not by much. You did not use your tribe to further yourself, you allowed people who care about you to help you. Huge difference between the two."

"But now? What do I do? Go in there and tell them thanks for the help but I don't need you anymore?"

I put my other hand under her chin and raised her face to look at me, "C'mon, even I know that's not what you're doing. You're not packing your shit and moving away. I don't think either of us want to give up that comfy ass bed we have for hotel rooms full time again."

She contemplated that for about two seconds, "Good point."

I'd managed to lighten the mood a bit, but it didn't last long. "I'm not about to tell you how to handle this," I said, "I can't give any decent advice because I have no idea what I would do in your place. I know how much you fought to get people to respect you as Shaman, to trust you, to believe in you. I have to help Sam though. If Gordon is actually involved in this shit, Sam's got a target on his back again and I won't sit something like that out. I don't want to cause more issues for you, so if you want to stay here and lead your people you know I'll be fine with that."

"I know."

Her eyes left mine and I let her lean against my chest again. I didn't push her, just ran my hand lightly over her hair and watched the leaves of the plants around us shift in the wind. I had no idea what she'd choose or really what her options were. I doubted she'd get exiled or anything like that but this was one of those situations where no one was really right or wrong and those are never easy. I'd guess about twenty minutes went by before she sat up. "Got a plan?"

"Yes. I need to go home and get dressed."

"Should I change?" I was in an old, beat to hell, oil stained t-shirt and jeans that had hit that stage of so comfy they were close to falling apart.

She stood up, took a long look at me and was totally serious when she replied, "There's a part of me that really, really wants you to show up like that, because it would piss certain people off but let's play it safe and go with less holes and oil stains."

I took hold of the hand she'd reached out to help me up with and stood up, "Hmm, if we're going for impact of some kind or other I could always go with the Fed threads."

"Hell no, those fit you like crap. You look like a badly paid mortician."

We started walking back to the house, "Hey!"

"Go with the clothes I bought you."

"Only if you promise not to molest me in public," I wanted to try to get some sort of smile out of her before we went to this meeting. Fortunately that did it.

"Things I never expected to hear out of your mouth. You telling me not to molest you."

I got all serious and proper sounding, "Well, I've been trying to be an upstanding citizen these days. Making out in the middle of the street sort of runs counter to that."

She smirked, "Uh huh, sure."

We got back to the house and that bit of humor faded. I rummaged through the closet and found my clothes, she'd gone into her room to get clothes, which meant the next time I saw her she'd be full Native as she called it. I was kind of hoping she'd give me a heads up on what her plan was since I was going to be there, but I wasn't really expecting it.

Sure enough, when she came out she was in the same clothes she'd worn when hunting Leaping Deer. It wasn't her full on ceremonial attire but it still made an impact. The fact that she left her hair down made it contrast even more with the white background and bold stripes of color. She was all business, but I couldn't quite tell if I was seeing the Shaman, the hunter or a version of her that was somewhere in between.

She gave me a quick once over, nodded in approval and walked down the stairs, I followed. She picked up Rising Dove's letter, put it back in the envelope and slid it into her pocket. "When we get there, stay near the back of the room. Don't give the impression that this is something you're making me do."

"Got it." With that we got in her car and drove to the meeting.

I've never been all that great with political games and manuevering, at least until I spent time with Crowley, that was all he did. It always struck me as odd that the King of Hell ruled more through threats, games and manipulation than through sheer force. When I first went to Hell, that wasn't the impression I got at all. I don't know when the regime had changed or who had ruled before him but Abaddon and Alastair had seemed a lot more kill first, ask for loyalty later kind of demons than Crowley. Either way, watching him play Abaddon loyalists against each other and rule his territory had taught me a few things about appearances and the different ways power can be wielded. Since moving in I'd watched Coyote wrangle different factions together to get some serious projects accomplished and I knew roughly where everyone stood which would help. I just had to hold my temper in check and follow her lead. Hopefully she knew what she was doing.

There weren't a lot of cars there. "This not going to be a full meeting?" I asked.

"No, just the council. They'll fill in everyone else later." Another car pulled up, one neither of us wanted to see.

"Uh, he's not on the Council if I remember right."

"No, he's not, but he is friends with Gray Wolf, who is."

"Great," I'd somehow managed to not kill or respond to Dancing Badger so far. He'd tried to push me to, that's for damn sure. He'd never gotten over how she kicked his ass years ago. "Maybe I shouldn't have worn the nice clothes."

Her lips curled in disgust, "Blood washes out. Let's go."

I'd wrapped my hands up with gauze and Ace bandages before we left, no reason to let people see how jacked up my knuckles were but it would give people like Badger the wrong impression. I saw it as soon as I got of the car and he spotted the bandages, he thought I was somehow too damaged to fight. Idiot. I ignored him and walked a half pace behind her as we went inside. That didn't go unnoticed by the council when we passed through the door. Some of them, the ones that didn't have issues with me, caught the fact that I was showing her the proper respect. The ones who had issues with me, well they jumped right past that and to the heart of things.

"Why is he here? He is not Lakota." Gray Wolf apparently wanted to get straight into dick mode from the get go.

The council was made up of seven people. They voted on tribal stuff, organized and ran things, Coyote, as Shaman was the default leader. She happened to be one of the youngest Shamans to do so. She was also the first college educated woman who'd spent most of her early adulthood off the Reservation to have that title as well. The only thing that had kept the majority of the council from out and out rejecting her was Rising Dove's approval of her and his final wish being that she should follow in his footsteps. A lot of them had wanted Cougar or Gray Wolf. Cougar may have been the same age as Coyote but he'd never left, had grown up studying with Rising Dove and was very dedicated to his people. Gray Wolf was liked in, what Coyote called, the blind fools circles. He'd fought her on every damn thing and his corner of the tribe tended to be assholes. We were all meeting in a small room in the back of the tribe's town hall. There was about four rows of ten chairs each facing seven chairs that were placed around a large conference table. The room was pretty sparse, it had thin carpet on top of cemet floors, boring brown walls and flourscent lighting. Dancing Badger had come in through the side door and was sitting at the end of the first row.

Cougar was on the council, along with a few people who I never really talked to. Then there was Fox Who Sings, who Sam and I had saved from demons and Hunting Bat, the oldest member of the tribe. She was pushing ninety, looked seventy and was probably healthier than I was. For some reason when I looked at her, that was how I pictured Coyote as she aged. Even though she was shorter than Coyote and her hair was very non traditionally short she had the same couldn't give a shit attitude about things. She said it was because at her age there wasn't anything anyone could say or do that would shock her anymore. I could never call her Bat because I just associated that with someone being bat-shit insane, which had cracked her up when I told her. Most people called her Grandma Bat, I just used her full name or ma'am. For some reason she said me calling her ma'am made her feel older than people calling her Grandma. I'd done some work around her house, fixed her cars and drank more than a few beers on her porch. Usually the more she drank the more she flirted with me, but it never creeped me out because it was all in good fun.

"Well," Hunting Bat said, "Guess you can skip the eye doctor this year Gray Wolf, you can still tell the difference between a white man and a Lakota. Congratulations." She gave me a quick wink and a smirk, I had to fight to keep myself from laughing. I noticed Coyote's shoulders shaking for a second before she got herself back under control though. Hunting Bat and Gray Wolf weren't exactly the best of friends.

Gray Wolf shot her a glare, huffed and then kept going, "This is tribal business, he's not part of the tribe. That was my point."

I stopped once I got inside and leaned against the back wall, Coyote went straight to Hunting Bat and handed her the letter. "You are correct Gray Wolf," she said, "He's not part of the tribe but this has to do with him as well as I so I asked him here."

That wasn't exactly accurate but I wasn't going to point that out.

"Grandmother, please read this. Cougar gave this to me today, it is from Rising Dove. You knew my teacher when he was a child, I wish you to verify this is from him."

That shut Gray Wolf up and drew shocked stares from the rest of the council. Cougar actually looked mad, which was a huge red flag. He obviously felt that letter should be for her eyes only and I couldn't really blame him. I had no idea what game she was playing here. Hunting Bat solemnly took the letter, read it and gave me one the most calculating stares I'd ever been subjected to. I wasn't sure what she was looking at or for but after a long minute her eyes left me and centered on Coyote.

She handed the letter back and nodded, "This is indeed his handwriting and his tone. I would have to say it is from him. Are you going to let the others read it?"

Coyote shook her head and put the letter back in her pocket, "I don't seek council from them, I seek it from you."

Hunting Bat's eyes widened for a quick second and then she seemed to grasp whatever it was Coyote was trying to do. "The contents of the letter. Are they accurate?"

"Yes," Coyote didn't even hesitate.

"Then what is your answer to the question he posed at the end of it?"

Coyote stepped back, swept her eyes across the entirety of the council, then turned and looked at me. "That I wish to be free again. I wish to help, not lead, to choose how I use my gifts and who I use them for."

Every single one of them, except for Cougar and Hunting Bat started talking all at once. I watched Cougar, I didn't care about the rest. He'd been taken completely off guard but he recovered fast. The anger left and was replaced by something close to sorrow, it came and went so quick I wasn't too sure if the sorrow was because she was throwing herself back into the line of fire or because he felt she was, once again, throwing her skills away.

"What the hell is going on?" Gray Wolf shouted over the top of everyone else.

Hunting Bat held her hand up, they all quieted down. "Shaman Running Coyote, do you wish to step down as head of this council?"

"Yes."

Seven sets of eyes were riveted on her, and about four of those sets were pretty damn angry.

"I understand that you may not want to go into expansive detail as to why," Hunting Bat continued, "But the council and the people you have served deserve some sort of explanation. Many traditions were set aside to fulfill Rising Dove's wishes."

"I am well aware of that and I thank those who stood by me." She shifted so she was standing directly in front of the middle of the table, her back was to Badger and I. "The men and women who have helped us with the truck stop, they are facing a threat that I feel compelled to help them fight. This means that I have to leave for an unknown length of time and may not return, not because I don't want to but because I will be unable to. I cannot, in good conscience, leave the tribe leaderless if that were to occur. The threat is not a direct threat to the tribe, although if we lose the people the progress of that project will come to a halt. I feel that there are others here that can lead more consistently than I can. If I were to suggest anyone it would be Cougar Kills Bear. He is dedicated to this tribe in ways that I am not, he studied under Rising Dove and has helped me. He knows more herblore and rituals than I do or have a desire to learn. True, he does not have the connection to the Spirits that I do but when, if, I return I will be able to guide him using what the Spirits tell me. That is all I wish to say."

These days my adrenaline doesn't start pumping unless I'm facing something along the lines of Cain. It takes a lot to amp me up but how friggin quick she'd turned this whole thing around on everyone, including Cougar, had managed to rachet up the tension in the room in record time. Thing was, she'd set all of them back on their heels, it was damn impressive that she'd outmaneuvered an entire council like that. She'd of been an amazing leader. Before I had much of a chance to appreciate that all those eyes that had been staring at her started staring at me. This was about to get messy.


	4. Where Loyalties Lie

On the up side, the council members weren't looking at me like I was food, which was usually how large numbers of things who have issues with me do. On the down side, this wasn't exactly my cup of tea.

Hunting Bat's eyes were on me as she spoke, "You stated you were seeking my advice, Coyote. It sounds like you've made up your mind so I'm unclear as to what you need my advice for."

Coyote's back was still towards me so I couldn't get any clue as to what I should be doing.

"I wish to know that when I return if Dean and I will be seen as some sort of pariah and have to start all over again getting this tribe's approval or if we will finally be seen as the assets that we are and be welcomed back."

All those eyes snapped back to her, which I was kind of grateful for. "I cannot speak for the entire tribe on a matter like this," Hunting Bat stated. "Everyone will have their own opinions."

"I see."

I may not be able to see her face but I didn't need to. One of the main reasons she hated the council as a whole was their lack of willingness to take any sort of stand on anything. She knew that the council couldn't force anyone to think a certain way but she'd obviously been hoping that at least some of them would be willing to stand up for her on this. She'd told me plenty of times over the last year that the difference between how hunters looked at things and how her tribe did was that for the most part, when it came down to it a hunter would back another hunter to the hilt against any sort of threat. The council, much less the tribe could barely figure that out. She'd had that realization after the whole Leaping Deer thing.

"Then I will leave the council to their business. I have to prepare to leave." She gave them a curt nod and started to walk out. She made it three steps.

"Of all the arrogant, self centered, selfish things I have ever seen you do," Gray Wolf stated, "This tops them all. You bully your way onto this council, have fun with it for a few years, then when something more attractive comes along, you leave. Your father would weep at this and if Rising Dove were still here he'd be cursing your name!"

She froze, for half a second I thought she was just going to keep walking. Then Black Hawk, who was Dancing Badger's older sister and had always been jealous of Coyote for more reasons that I could count took her shot. "This has nothing to do with those people, it has to do with with Dean. I assume that since those people are his friends that he is leaving and therefore you're following along. You act as if you are being noble and thinking about the tribe yet, as always, you are thinking about nothing more than how to please yourself. It's not enough that you have one of them sleeping with you, but two? You seriously expect us to believe that his brother spends so much time at your house just to visit."

That was my cue, "Honey, how far we pushing this?" I asked. I loved the house, sure, but I'd have no problem leaving these people. The ones that I liked would probably still talk to me, not that it mattered. We could move to the Bunker, I'd find a larger room to move into that would work for us, but she'd built that house from scratch and I knew she loved it here.

Before she could answer Cougar, Hunting Bat, Fox Who Sings and Red Cloud all stood up, turned their back on the remaining three and walked away. Once they reached the third row back of chairs they stopped and took up positions along the walls.

"We can't speak for the tribe," Hunting Bat stated, "But we can speak for ourselves. They go too far, neither you Dean, or Coyote have done anything to deserve that much disrespect."

While I appreciated the words I was more concerned with Coyote. The way she looked right then it was probably a good thing she hadn't brought any weapons. If she had, there would have been blood already. "Coyote? We making a stand here or movin' on?"

"This ends now." She growled. That told me all I needed to know.

"Fine, just to clarify here. You're not in charge anymore?"

"No." She started to turn back towards the table.

I moved, and moved fast. I caught her shoulder just before she got within punching distance. "Uh-uh, my turn."

Coyote's eyes connected with mine, her anger slammed into me which set off a few things in my head. I pushed it down as she nodded and slid to the side, giving me free rein.

"You have no grounds to speak," Gray Wolf blustered.

I lifted my hand off her shoulder and threw all that anger at Gray Wolf, "Shut the hell up." He winced and Black Hawk slid back an inch or two from the table. Black Hawk is short, usually cranky and one of those people who spent their lives saying shit about others because they'd never succeeded at anything. I had no idea how the hell she'd ended up on the council. Shining Doe was the other one still left at the table. She was in her sixties and never seemed to do much one way or the other about anything. The rumor I had heard was there'd once been a thing between her and Rising Dove that crashed and burned and she'd always held that against anyone he liked. He screwed her over in her opinion so anything or anyone he cared about automatically had to be destroyed.

I took the two more steps to the table and slammed my fists into the top of it, all three of them jumped. I saw Dancing Badger shoot up out of his seat out of the corner of my eye. I didn't even turn my head as I pointed at him, "Wait your turn asshole. I'll deal with you in a minute." He hadn't been expecting that and he hesitated. "Good idea. Now for the rest of you. This is how I see things. I've been here a year. A year in which I have done everything I could to help out, I've given people money and used my people to help your people out. You think I, or my friends, give a shit if there's a truck stop here? No, we don't. It's actually out of our way, we just really love Ralph and Stella and want them to have more tables, be able to make more cash and it worked out that it could help you guys too. The real reason they've been helping out though is because I asked them, that's it. I've also worked on just about every car here, usually for free or fucking cheap so take your goddamn attitudes and shove them up your ass. I've gotten more flack from people here than I ever have in my entire life and I've ignored it for two reasons. First, I don't give a shit about what you think about me and second, I love Coyote and I knew me being here was going to cause issues so I didn't want to stir things up even more. Now though, you've seriously crossed some lines."

I stuck my finger, which had some blood running down it since I'd punched the table, right into Black Hawk's cowering face, "You and your brother are useless cowards. In the time I've been here I haven't seen either of you, do anything, to help anyone out, so you two have no right to say anything about Coyote and I. Coyote's given up some seriously high paying gigs to stay here and work on those projects you keep trying to derail." Then I shifted my attention to Gray Wolf, "And you? Have you even been out to the construction site? Just about everyone else, including kids have. You accuse her of being self centered when she just invested about $10k of her own cash into that school you fought tooth and nail. You fucking bastard, you're the one with no right to speak." He'd started to find some courage in there somewhere and was about to respond when I leaned forward and got right in Black Hawk's face. "So here's how this is going down. Until about three or four years ago I never had a home, I'd spent my whole life on the road till then. My brother and I found a place a few years back and moved in. Then shit in my life hit the fan and I needed to re-evaluate a lot of crap. Coyote and I hooked back up. She took a chance on me and we've built a life here. There's very few people in the world I care deeply about, actually there's only two. Coyote and Sam. You've managed to insult both and threaten my home. Either you back the hell down right now and apologize or take me on. Since you aren't a fighter, I'll take on your weak ass brother over there and two of his friends. That should be fair odds."

Badger let out what was probably the closest thing to an actual Native American war cry I'd ever hear. It probably would have phased most people, but then, I'm not most people. I finally turned to look at him, "Save your breath dickhead, you'll need it." For some reason that shut him right up. "You guys figure it out, I'll be outside." I leaned back, "Oh and when I finish kicking their asses you keep all future insults about my family to yourselves and not one single thing happens to our house or whatever car is left there while we're gone. If we get back and shit's been trashed, I'll take it out of the hides of whoever did it. I'm done playing nice."


	5. Not So Distant Rumblings

I didn't even bother looking at Badger as I rejoined Coyote and we started heading towards the door. As we passed Cougar he held his hand up. Coyote stopped and I took her cue.

"Dancing Badger," Cougar said in that deadly empty voice, that one that's soft yet carries through an entire room. I never have gotten that down, "In case you or your friends have difficulty in counting to two and four or five of them try to join in, I will take immediate steps to correct your math. Do I make myself clear?"

Badger managed to look offended at that.

"Don't play innocent with me," Cougar continued, "You're a horrible liar. Dean? Ready?"

Cougar had our back, good. "Yup." He, Coyote and I went out the door. I gave him a quick grin, "Thanks."

The stone faced look he'd had on slipped for a second or two; a tight, bloodthirsty smile swept across his lips then disappeared, "You've hated him for a year. I've hated him since the second grade. Kicked his ass three times already. Be more than happy to do it again."

"Not the brightest tool in the shed is he?"

"No, but he's faster than you think and clever. The only reason Coyote defeated him so easily before is he was overconfident. He had no idea what she'd been doing all the years she'd been gone. He won't make that same mistake with you."

"Not to sound arrogant, but he has even less idea of what I've been doing. Thanks for the tip though."

"Not a problem."

Four cars skidded to a stop in the parking lot, three more were barreling down the street and several people were jogging towards us, "Huh, that traveled fast."

Coyote's hand squeezed my shoulder, "Not much happens around these parts."

"Great, high school all over again."

Rabbit and his family pulled up, along with several of our neighbors, "Dean? What the hell is going on?" Rabbit asked.

I didn't really want to get into all of it, I had other things to look out for, like Chasing Horse and Brown Fox coming my way. They weren't here to talk. "Coyote? Care to bring Rabbit up to speed?"

"Yeah, in a minute." She'd seen the same thing I had. "Dean, Horse loves to use his legs, he'll try to keep you busy to let the others get close. Fox has real martial arts training. Let Cougar or I help."

One of these days I'd learn to think my way all the way through a threat, "Remember last time we did this dance?"

Her hand grabbed mine and squeezed, pain shot up my hand, "Yeah, but I knew I was only fighting him and I wasn't already injured."

I looked away from the guys who were getting ready to kick my ass, or so they thought, put my hands on either side of her face and kissed her. "Those scrapes hardly count as injuries for me. My point was this is the same sort of set up. If we're going to keep living here all this shit would come to a head at some point or other. Better now when I'm calling the shots, then later, and it comes out of nowhere catching one of us at a bad time, if you get my drift."

She thought about it for a second, "You have a point. All right, don't kill any of them."

I had to laugh, "No doubts I'm going to win then huh?"

"Oh you'll win. I wasn't offering to help because I thought you'd lose."

There was fear in her eyes, that's when I got it, "I'm fine. Promise. Fight like this? Doubt it will trigger anything."

Her lips met mine again then she pulled back, "Love you."

"You too."

There was a nice ring of people forming, they were oddly quiet though. Badger and his minions were on the other side, failing at intimidating me with their glares.

I was about to step into the ring when Cougar spoke up again, "Coyote has a point, try not to kill them. However, it would be of great service to the tribe if you could arrange it so Badger needs to have his jaw wired shut for a few weeks."

I couldn't let that one pass, I raised my voice just enough so Badger could hear, "Got it Cougar, one broken jaw comin' up."

Badger's eyes went flat with hate and he started to lunge towards me, the other two pulled him back. "Don't worry about it guys, I'm good. Unless there's some sort of foreplay we're supposed to go through before we do this thing. Faster I slam your faces into the dirt the faster I can get home and pack. I've got more important things to do then this today." People tend to think I bluster because I'm just that cocky. Years ago? Sure. Now it's strategic. If you're pissed off, you fuck up. I've been in too many fights to get emotional about it anymore. Yeah, sure I was pissed about the comments but I got over that about a second after I'd hit the table. Badger hated us and I wanted him seeing red, it'd keep him from actually paying attention, hopefully.

"You think you can defeat three warriors that easily?" Horse snarled. Badger was too busy grinding his teeth to talk, Fox had calmed down. He was going to be the one I had to watch out for.

"Yup. You guys are fighters, sure, wouldn't go so far as to call you warriors. I mean, Coyote kicked Badger's ass a few years back after all. What kind of warrior gets his ass kicked by a woman?"

That got some shocked gasps and a few snickers from the crowd. Badger shoved his friends off of him and came right at me.

Cougar had been right about how fast he was, he almost caught me with a right cross, I blocked at the last second and drove my fist towards his stomach, he hopped back and took up a fighting stance. Huh, he was clever. His face was all contorted like he was pissed but I could see that he was planning things out, waiting for me to make a move. Two things I had to do to not come out on the bottom in this fight, not let any of them get behind me and try to keep one of them getting up after I either chucked them across the ring or tripped them. Two on one I could handle. Three on one would get complicated.

Horse and Fox fanned out to either side of me, "We're going to rip you to shreds," Badger said.

I shifted closer to Horse,"Yeah, been there, done that, still kickin'. " Horse had some long ass legs on him and if I kept close to him he'd have to step back to get any decent power behind his kicks. He backed up, good. Badger feinted towards me, I faded back from his fist and shot my foot towards his near knee. It hit but he'd shuffled back just in time to keep it from doing any real damage.

Fox did this hop skip thing that I saw out of my peripheral and before I could really register what was going on a foot was coming towards my head. Fucker was fast! I ducked but he clipped me and I took a risk. I acted like it hit harder than it had, dropped and rolled closer to Horse.

"Not so tough now huh?" Horse said as he reared his foot back to nail me in the chest.

I love it when people think I'm a weak ass. I was on my side, grimacing and acting like I was out of it, his foot came right at me. I grabbed his ankle with both my hands, rolled forward over the top of his leg and took his ankle with me. The sound of several tendons popping reached my ears as he screamed. I didn't stop there, his knee went completely out of socket as I dropped all my weight on the inside of the joint. Then I slammed my elbow into his crotch and jerked what was left of his foot up, hard. I was pretty sure his hip was out of joint by the end of that.

His eyes went wide as he screamed and then he went limp, guess he blacked out from the pain. Just to make sure he'd stay out I drove my fist into his face, breaking his nose and probably blackening both eyes. I rolled off of him, stood up and faced the other two. Fox was staring at what was left of Horse and Badger started yelling in Lakota.

"Yeah, don't understand a word you're saying," I said, "but I'll assume you're not complimenting my technique. We still going or are you two done?"

Apparently seeing a guy get his leg completely trashed is something the people there weren't used to. It was dead quiet and a few of them had their hands over their mouths. A couple of kids were just staring with their mouths hanging wide open.

Fox started throwing kick after kick at me, I really hate that, but he was keeping me busy and moving. I just kept my arms up to block and made sure to keep my legs moving so he couldn't land a good hit. He was trying to get me to turn my back away from the crowd so Badger could get behind me, I wasn't about to let that happen.

I noticed after the second set that there was a pattern to his kicks. Just as I did Badger flew at me in between a gap in Fox's kicks and I couldn't shift fast enough to block the fist that took me right in the ribs, knocking the wind out of me. He followed that up with a straight jab to the face because I couldn't quite stop my block from dropping as I tried to breathe. I let the hit drive me back.

"You fucking bastard," Badger snarled, then nailed me in the face again.

This was starting to get annoying. I was about to just go all out when I heard Coyote yell, "Neck!"

Shit! I threw my hands up just as Fox got his arm around my throat. I'd been a half a second to slow. I had to give them credit, he'd slipped behind as I turned to face Badger. This was going to get painful. Fox is about four inches shorter than I am so he was bending me back as he tried to choke me out, which screwed with my leverage to try to flip him over somehow. He is, however, lighter than I am. I used that to my advantage. Badger came at me with his fists again. I hooked my foot around Fox's ankles and took the hit from Badger. I used the extra momentum to throw that much more weight at Fox who landed hard beneath me. His grip around my throat weakened, I took a deep breath and rolled to the right as Badger went for me again. He ended up hitting Fox who grunted but held on.

This was getting awkward.

Fox's gripped tightened again, "I won't stop when you pass out white man," Fox whispered in my ear, "Then I'll break your neck as she watches."

Because threatening the guy who just took out your friend's leg in at least three places is such a hot idea. It was starting to get hard to breathe though so something had to give. Since Fox wasn't giving up I had about five seconds to do something to Badger and hope it shook Fox loose. I tried to roll onto my back again but Fox had braced himself somehow, but that might work in my favor. Badger was aiming a kick at my head and fortunately his near leg was the one he was standing on. Heavy boots are so handy for busting knees.

I launched my foot at him, he'd been waiting for it and shifted his kick from my head to my leg. That actually hurt, my leg went limp which wasn't good. He'd nailed the nerves just right, it'd be out of commission for a bit. My vision was tunneling down and I was gasping for air.

"We'll tell your brother you tried," Badger taunted as he leaned in close.

Bad move on his part, as he found out when I did my damnedest to drive his bottom jaw up through his skull. My right hand exploded with shooting pains, Badger reeled back, spitting teeth and blood. Fox shifted his grip to try to break my neck, another bad move. That gave me a second or two to twist out of his hands and drive my other hand into his face. He leaned back, I kept on him. He blocked my right hand and slammed his left into my face. By this point I was tasting blood and one of my eyes was starting to swell shut, both my fists were in pretty intense pain and my throat hurt from the choke hold. Fox's eyes shifted to look over my shoulder, I heard scuffling behind me, that was my cue.

I took the edge of my left hand, slammed it into Fox's throat and rolled to the left. Odd hacking sounds came from Fox as he tried to figure out if I'd crushed his windpipe, I was facing up and Badger was coming at with me with a knife. Not good. Blood was streaming down his chin and the right side of his face was swelling and bruised already. I wasn't quite sure how he was still standing to be honest. I must not have hit him as hard as I thought, damn jacked up knuckles.

"No more, I will not let you and that whore think you're better than the rest of us!" He raised his arm, let out another piercing cry and drove his knife towards my chest. The whole crowd gasped and started hollering.

"Dean!" Coyote screamed.

As Badger's blade came towards me it reflected the sun right into my eyes, and the way his body moved he ended up back lit against the sun, becoming just this looming dark mass above me. An entire, demented and twisted catalog of memories flooded my brain, Alastair holding a knife as he stood over my shattered body, hellhounds chewing into me, Cain stalking me with his huge knife, Abaddon, the First Blade, Azazel hovering over my bed, all of it. I went cold inside, dead, and I didn't think, I just moved.

My foot flew out, nailing him in the chest. The air rushed out of his lungs and the blade faltered in it's downward arc. My hands moved on their own, grabbing his wrist, twisting it, bones breaking, knife dropping. I shoved him back, he stumbled cradling his hand to his chest. His knife had fallen next to me, convienent. I managed to get my legs under me again and I saw it, the fear. He'd realized just what the fuck was standing in front of him.

"That's right idiot," I said as I stalked him, "Now you're starting to understand."

My left leg was just strong enough to support me, I took a step closer. His eyes were clouded with pain, good. I reversed my grip on the blade and slammed the hilt of it into directly into the side of his head and he dropped like a rock to the ground. I flipped the knife back around and walked over to Fox who was managing to breathe again, at least he was until I drove my boot into his ribs.

"Give or do I make it more clear that you're done?"

He raised his hands and shook his head, "Done," he squeaked out.

"Good." I looked around, Horse was still out, Badger was bleeding everywhere and Fox had given up. "Anyone else want to get in on this? I asked. "I'm warmed up now. Could probably go another round or two."

The crowd was barely breathing. All of them, except for Cougar and Coyote, took a long step back.

"Okay then. So no more shit gets said about Coyote, I or my brother. Understood? Coyote and I have to bail to help my friends, you know, the ones that have been working their asses off helping build you a truck stop. When we get back I don't want to see or hear any more crap about white people being in your town. I'm here to fucking stay, you don't like it, keep your mouth shut or you'll end up like these three jackasses. We clear?"

Heads started nodding as fast as possible. I dropped the knife on the ground and looked down at my shirt. There were a few torn buttons and more than a few spots of blood. "Damn." My face was still bleeding and for some stupid reason I didn't want anymore blood to get on the shirt, so I pulled it off over my head.

"Holy shit," I heard a few people mutter and a bunch of quick intakes of breath. Crap.

I have a lot of scars, I don't keep track of them because they come and go. Old ones fade, I get new ones. It'd been a year or so since I'd gotten new ones but there were still plenty of old knife and claw wounds, along with bullet hole and places I'd been impaled while flying across the room thanks to one supernatural thing or another deciding to play Dean toss. I tend not to walk around shirtless around people who don't know me because it's always awkward. Women I'd hook up with over the years thought the scars were cool and made me mysterious, plus we usually had other things on our minds.

These people, however, had just seen me wipe the floor with three of what they considered were their toughest guys. None of them were slouches, they were actually pretty good fighters. They'd have taken most guys out easy, but then I have a ridiculous pain tolerance and more experience than they could ever hope to have. Not that I'd ever wish what I'd been through on anyone. So if you add how quick I took out three guys to the layers of scars on my back and chest, not to mention all the self inflicted ones on my arms and palm and toss in the fact that I had bandages on both sets of knuckles before the fight even started; it totaled up to someone that most people probably don't want to spend a lot of time with. I happened to be standing in the middle of a bunch of people just now figuring that out.

I'm not all that fond of being stared at like I'm some sort of a psychokiller who's been on vacation but it'd look stupid putting the shirt back on now. I looked at Coyote and Cougar, pretty much clueless on how to handle this.

Coyote walked over to me, took the shirt out of my hands and gave me a light kiss on the cheek. "Fortunately I know how to sew buttons back on and I still have soda water in the trunk. We'll dump some on there before we head home. Hydrogen peroxide may stain it."

"Cool."

"Dean," Rabbit said as he took a step towards me.

"Yeah?"

"Here," he pulled his shirt off and tossed it at me.

"Thanks man. I'll wash it before I get it back to you, just in case I get some blood on it." I pulled it on and tried to avoid any fresh blood.

"Don't worry about it, got plenty."

The crowd started moving a bit more, which I took as a good sign.

"Black Hawk, call for an ambulance." Hunting Bat said, "In the meantime, see to your brother's wounds."

"You're going to do nothing!" Black Hawk hissed.

"Dean was outnumbered three to one, it is not his fault your brother is injured. It's your brother's. Dean?"

All the various pains were starting to hit me again but I had to wait it out for another minute or two apparently, "Yes ma'am?"

"Thank you." That drew several what the hells from the crowd.

"For what?"

She gave me one of those long apprising looks, then gestured towards the three guys on the ground. "For showing restraint."

Her and I were going to have a have a long talk at some point it seemed. Course, she'd been around a lot of years, who knew what she'd seen in her life time. "Just remember, this wasn't what I wanted. I'd pretty much planned on not doing crap like this anymore. So take that for what it's worth."

I put my arm around Coyote's shoulders, my leg was starting to go numb again, stupid nerves. "Let's go home. We still have crap to do."

"Sure."


	6. Sanitarium

(Author's note: I know I sort of blew past the Katie Cassidy being Ruby and Laurel way back in the first one but I decided to play with it here, because I can, and it's fanfic.)

We got back to the house, Coyote patched me up, again and gave me more of her healing tea to drink. It numbed a lot of the pain within an hour or so, along with three or four extra strength aspirins. I was going to try to push it and finish cleaning the guns, at least I was until she shoved me down onto the couch and basically said , "Sit, stay!" then glared at me as she started field stripping the next gun. I got the point.

Since I'd been put on couch duty I figured I should check Magnus's files that Sam had uploaded to the site so I grabbed my laptop, after assuring Coyote that was all I was doing, and clicked on the site icon that Felicity had added when they were here. Since Sam still had a vamp hanging out in the dungeon I figured I'd start there and typed vampire in the search bar. Seconds later about a hundred references to vamps popped up. "Damn, if we'd had this years ago, the hours we would have saved." I muttered. I started scrolling through the options and one caught my eye.

"On Alternative Methods of Interrogating Vampires"

That could be useful, I clicked on the link and started reading.

"Vampires, like demons, heal rapidly and are much less vulnerable to even enhanced weapons. Holy water, salt, exorcisms, none of these affect a vampire. Dead man's blood weakens them but it does not cause them much distress. If information is needed from a vampire, such as the location of it's nestmates, there is a scarcity of options to compel them to speak.

I, through much research, which, of course, has been frowned upon by the establishment, have devised a method of causing a vampire such intense pain that it will do it's utmost to share all knowledge within mere minutes of being exposed to it. It is indeed a pity that my fellow Men of Letters continue to doubt the validity of my research."

Magnus was just as arrogant on paper as he'd been in person. The guy was a genius though so I couldn't really hold it against him.

"This method requires an injection of the following components into a fairly robust specimen. If too weakened, this brew could kill a vampire immediately so it's rather important to take care to not injure it too severely before continuing. The ingredients are as follows:

Three drops each of Oils of Myrrh, Frankincense, Sage, Garlic and Cedar, placed into 100 ml of Holy Water to which two pinches of pure salt have been added. Repeat the standard purifying invocation over this mixture and then add four drops of Dead Man's Blood.

What I have discovered is that the ancient tales of vampires fearing Holy Ground and Garlic weren't incorrect, they were just not accurate. The body of the vampire, like our own skin, protects it from these things. Once they have become fully undead the body is merely a shell, the thing that keeps the vampire alive is it's blood. That is where it's true weakness is. Purify the blood and you purify the vampire. One 10 cc dose of this causes intense pain, two will send it into madness, the Hunger will be so strong as to render it incoherent, three will kill it. Of the fifteen trials I have done since discovering the power of this brew all the vampires have answered truthfully after one dose. The first thirty trials were spent adjusting dosages and verifying the full extent of it's power. If you wish to restore the vampire for whatever reason, you can feed it blood after the first dose and it will heal. All further doses the damage is irreversible.

Thus ends this experiment."

"Holy shit..."

Coyote, who had one of the shotguns apart at this point stopped what she was doing and looked over at me. "Find something?"

"Yeah, it's something all right. Take a look."

She sat down next to me and read it, her eyes were pretty wide by the end, "Holy shit is right. Who was this guy again?"

"Smartest guy of the bunch, got exiled. When we ran across him he hadn't aged in fifty years, was living in an invisible fortress and had a bunch of monsters as living zoo exhibits. I killed him with the Blade, my first kill with that thing actually." I pushed that memory aside as quick as possible. "I need to tell Sam."

"And every other hunter out there," she added.

"Nope, not right now."

Then she remembered what we were dealing with, we'd had kind of a crazy day so far so I couldn't fault her for forgetting. "Good point, scratch that idea for now."

I hit the Facetime app, his face popped up on the screen a few seconds later. "Dean?" His eyes narrowed and his face got stuck somewhere between confused, worried and wary, "Natives get restless all of a sudden?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, my face. It's not a big deal."

"Uh huh, you're in the house so is it safe to assume whoever pissed you off is still breathing?"

"Yeah, they're fine. One won't be walking for a few months, the other two will be fine in a week or two."

He pushed his hair back, ran his hand over his forehead and seemed exasperated for some reason. "Three of them? Do I want to know?"

"Remember why Coyote fought Dancing Badger all those years ago?"

"Yeah,"

"Same kind of thing. Got tired of people giving us shit so did something about it. Not important. This is."

I saw a flash of irritation and I wasn't sure if it was because I was dismissing the fight or the idea that I'd allowed someone to piss me off to the point where I'd started throwing punches. "Hold up, you're okay? Not talking about physical injuries here."

"Yes, no snapping. Promise. Get on your laptop, pull up the site and look at this link I'm sending you." I opened the chat feature that they had cleverly added to the site and pasted the link. He shifted to his laptop, got on and clicked on the link. His eyes skimmed the article, or at least that's what it would look like to most people. Sam reads whole damn paragraphs at a time and grasps everything in them, I'd always been a bit jealous about that skill.

"I've got all of that except the garlic stuff here," he said after he was done, "I know where I can get it though. I'll grab some bagged blood too, get him filled up then dose him with this stuff and see what happens. He's pretty much useless right now. I went to town on him a bit but he's too weak to even notice. If nothing else this takes a lot less effort on our part. I'll stick some extra shackles on him though, maybe use the chair that we stuck Crowley in with the neck restraints. Keep his teeth off me."

"Probably not a bad idea. We'll finish up prepping here and head out tomorrow. Hear from Oliver yet?"

"Yeah, they're going to wait for Roy and Thea to get back and then catch a flight out here. He and I both agreed that Felicity should stay there, she didn't but when I informed her we have no actual internet connections out here she sounded somewhat horrified and asked how we were surviving in such barbaric conditions. I told her that unless she had a way to hack into a non existent wifi signal in the middle of nowhere in Kansas she'd probably be happier and more useful in command central. She wasn't happy about it but she gave in."

I tried to laugh but my face hurt, "Went right for the throat on that one I see, threatened the very soul of a techie."

He smiled, "Oliver texted me later and thanked me. He wasn't making much headway. Anyway they'll be out day after tomorrow, so we have some time to kill. Felicity has gotten some hits on the faces. Not sure anything of much use, last known addresses and all that but she is running scans for any of them that pop up on surveillance cameras within a hundred miles of where we were. It's a start anyway."

"Better than nothing. Is Thea coming too?" I wasn't sure that'd be too bright of an idea.

"No, she's going to help Laurel fill in for Oliver and the rest while they're helping us."

I hadn't heard that name before, "Laurel?" He looked a bit uncomfortable, like it was a sore subject with him.

"Uh, yeah. You know the drama that Roy sort of likes to avoid?"

"Yeah?"

"Laurel was the girl Oliver was dating prior shipwreck, he came back, she found out he'd messed around with her sister and wasn't dead, things went south between them, then her sister came back "from the dead" then left again, then..you know what." He stopped, shrugged and redirected the whole topic, "Details aren't important. Let's just say lots of awkwardness ensued, but now she's helping Oliver."

"Okay, but how does all that get you looking like she bugs the crap out of you? She super annoying or something?"

"It's just that, well, she looks like the original Ruby's twin sister, like identical twin. Just creeps me out a bit. I even tested her the first chance I got just to be sure. Stuck Holy Water in her drink. She's damn lucky I didn't stab her with Ruby's knife the first time she walked into the club."

"Yikes, yeah I can see how that would drive you nuts. Thanks for the heads up so I know not to throw Holy Water in her face if I see her. That could be awkward."

He nodded, "Sure thing. Any idea on the next step?"

"No, sorry, been a bit busy this morning. Give me a few hours to roll things around in my head some more."

"Sure. See you tomorrow then?"

"Yeah."

"Cool. Oh and Dean?"

"What?"

"I'm glad you tested the waters, not that I'm saying go out and get into more fights but after the way you tore out of here and that dream. Just, I was worried."

"Me too. See ya soon."

He nodded and hung up.

Coyote had finished the shotgun while Sam and I talked and I was starting to feel guilty for not helping, or at least doing something but I knew that my hands were too damn swollen to do much and while I wasn't exactly in pain anymore, everything was throbbing. I decided to try looking through more of the information but about half an hour into that my eyes stopped being able to focus on the words. I never used to feel this wiped out after a beating. I must be out of practice, which isn't something a person ever should be in practice at. I closed the laptop and settled onto the couch so I could watch her clean guns. The repetitive sounds and motions of her hands were oddly relaxing and I let my mind drift, I had help, it wasn't just Sam and I against the world anymore. Other people could pick up the slack for once. Somewhere between her finishing the last nine mil and starting on the 45s I passed out.

"Yes, he's still asleep. I got all the weapons loaded and everything else packed. No, I tossed in a few extra things in the tea, didn't tell him, you know how stubborn he is Sam."

Coyote's voice filtered through a halfway decent dream I was having. It took me a second to process what she'd said. She'd drugged me, or herbed me, or whatever. I should have been cranky about it, but I wasn't, it actually made me feel pretty good. I never was good at letting people take care of me, not my role usually, I'd slowly learned how to let all that go over the last year but there was something about how she just did things to take care of me that still blew my mind. I decided to act like I was still out cold to see what else had been going on while I was asleep.

"The vampire thing worked?" She asked.

Wow, I must have been out for a few hours or Sam had been mainlining blood into the vamp.

"So he had no clue who Gordon is. Shit. Huh? How many? Not good. Well at least she tracked a few down. Yeah I'll run that by him when he wakes up, I agree it's a good idea. We need to make sure everyone we have helping us is really who they say they are. No, didn't miss the paranoia, guess we get to double down on that now. Yeah, all right. Get some rest. You've been on your feet for hours. Don't play the hero Sam, if we get there and you look dead on your feet I'll do the same thing to you I did to him. All right. See you tomorrow." I heard her set her phone down and felt her standing over me. She ran her hand through my hair, "Wish we could go back in time to the party and stay there," she whispered. "It's not fair, not after everything you two have been through."

I left my eyes closed as I took hold of her hand, "Hey, at least we got to have the party. Something like that will take Sam and I through a long stretch of bad if it comes down to it. We know how to appreciate the good things in life. What'd he say?"

Her hand stiffened then relaxed, "You were awake for that huh?"

"Some of it, I heard everything after you telling Sam you'd drugged me. Thanks."

"It's what I do. Vamp said that there's at least four other groups working together to track and kill hunters. He had no clue who Gordon is but the name Winchester is at the top of the capture list. There's a standing order that you and Sam are to be delivered up the food chain alive and in one piece. He says the rumor is that it's werewolves running things, not a vampire. He's heard there's a few shifters involved but no one knows for sure. They have been getting training in how to track hunters and lay kill trails to draw you guys out. The one you and Sam went to was the third one they'd done. They'd heard you'd retired so when you showed up along with Sam then bailed quick it through them off. You guys didn't follow usual hunter procedure, if you had, well you might not be here right now. That's all Sam got out of him."

And all of a sudden I felt that clock in my head again, ticking down the minutes leading towards some fan-frigging-tasticly agonizing, fucked up event. "How long was I out?"

She knew it too, "Three hours. Everything's packed."

I forced myself upright, my face throbbed a bit but everything else felt halfway decent. "Nice. I feel halfway human again. Pack any of those herbs? We'll probably need them."

"Whole backpack full."

I flexed my knuckles, aside from being swollen and tight they moved like they should. I could probably drive. "I'll tune up Baby at the Bunker, let's get on the road. Easier to coordinate if we're all in the same place." There was a second there, when our eyes met before I stood up, neither of us really wanted to leave. It hung there between us, "Ever been on a cruise?" I asked.

She's usually pretty good at following my random thoughts but this one completely lost her. "No. Why?"

"Me neither. We finish this, we take one. Consider it an engagement present."

I'd never seen her look that shocked, ever. "Wha...I...You're not kidding."

"No. You called it, statement of intent, you said yes. Don't most people do something to celebrate that kind of stuff?"

I kind of felt bad for her, she was trying to catch up and process the last few days. Hunter life, sometimes you sit for days doing nothing, then everything hits at once. I knew what I wanted, I'd been edging my way there, so had she and I wasn't letting us leave without making it damn clear that we were both coming back in one piece, no matter what.

I could tell the minute she'd managed to get over the shock of it, her lips curved into this absolutely stunning grin at the same time her eyes got that look. The look of a hunter heading into deep shit and making that decision to make it through. Once a hunter gets that look, not much will stop them.

"Yeah, they do. Deal. Let's get this shit over with so we can start drinking on the deck of a ship."

This wasn't the time for kisses and sex, that would come later. This was when you get your game face on and terrorize the things that terrorize everyone else. We packed the last minute shit we needed, grabbed snacks and drinks. She tossed me Baby's keys and we headed into the garage. Coyote opened the garage door as I got into the driver's seat.

Once we settled in, I started her up and ran my hand over the dash. "Sorry Baby, you're going to have to wait a bit longer for a vacation. I'll spoil the hell out of you when we get back to the Bunker though. Oh, and when we get back here, you're getting some upgrades. Just so you know."

Even though Sam had joked about tapes I had actually installed a CD player in her a few years back. Sam had resorted to using his phone and a wireless speaker set up but he'd left my collection under the passenger seat. "Hey, under your seat. Grab the CDs."

She dug under it for a second and pulled out the binder. I flipped through and found what I wanted. It wasn't the cheeriest song but it felt right for the moment. This wasn't a nostalgic fun trip, this was the last thing I'd ever wanted to do, but sometimes you have no choice. I shoved the CD in, put her in gear and backed out just as the opening notes of Metallica's Sanitarium kicked in. Coyote turned her head to look at me, "Babe?"

"I'm good. I love you and not a damn thing is going to get in the way of us getting on that ship."

She nodded, put her hand on my leg and we headed out.

By the time we got to the last verse I was ready. Fuck monsters, fuck hunting and fuck the bastards that decided to put Sam and I on a list. I pulled that coldness around the outer layers of who I was, the layers people had to see, but deep down, I'd put a huge ass wall around what Coyote and I shared, what we had together. Just as I got the last of that situated inside my head I felt this lurking, protective presence, wrapping itself around that bond. I was pretty damn sure it had grey fur, huge ass teeth and would never, ever stop fighting to protect what was behind those walls.

Born killer I may be, but that didn't mean that's all I was.

" _Welcome to where time stands still_  
 _No one leaves and no one will_  
 _Moon is full, never seems to change_  
 _Just labeled mentally deranged_  
 _Dream the same thing every night_  
 _I see our freedom in my sight_  
 _No locked doors, No windows barred_  
 _No things to make my brain seem scarred_

 _Sleep my friend and you will see_  
 _That dream is my reality_  
 _They keep me locked up in this cage_  
 _Can't they see it's why my brain says Rage_

 _Sanitarium, leave me be_  
 _Sanitarium, just leave me alone_

 _Build my fear of what's out there_  
 _Cannot breathe the open air_  
 _Whisper things into my brain_  
 _Assuring me that I'm insane_  
 _They think our heads are in their hands_  
 _But violent use brings violent plans_  
 _Keep him tied, it makes him well_  
 _He's getting better, can't you tell?_

 _No more can they keep us in_  
 _Listen, damn it, we will win_  
 _They see it right, they see it well_  
 _But they think this saves us from our hell_

 _Sanitarium, leave me be_  
 _Sanitarium, just leave me alone_  
 _Sanitarium, just leave me alone_

 _"Fear of living on_  
 _Natives getting restless now_  
 _Mutiny in the air_  
 _Got some death to do_  
 _Mirror stares back hard_  
 _Kill, it's such a friendly word_  
 _Seems the only way_  
 _For reaching out again." (Metallica, Sanitarium)_


	7. Old Friends Return

By the time we reached the Bunker Coyote had caught me up on Sam's latest info, the fact that Felicity had put at least some names to faces, had tracked a few down to where they were staying and Sam's idea that we needed to make sure that whatever hunters we decided to rely on were actually still hunters and not shifters I heartily agreed with that idea and figured we may as well get Oliver's crew used to be tested too, we'd probably be doing it a lot while all this crap was going on. After doing all that we bounced around ideas for the cruise to pass a few hours, which was fun but my heart wasn't really into it.

I'd ended up driving the whole trip, which was probably dumb because my hands had almost locked into place from gripping the wheel for hours but I was in a mood. I do some of my best planning and thinking while driving Baby and there'd been a lot rattling around my head.

Sam met us at the door and took a few of our bags from us as we walked inside. "I put the vamp out of his misery, the quick way. Figured I'd take care of it before you got here."

"Thanks." I hadn't been all that keen on beheading more things but I was going to have to get over that pretty quick if I was going to be useful. "Any updates?"

"Cas should be here in about an hour. He'll probably finish patching you up when he gets here. I told him you'd decided on a warm up match, he said he was pleased that your diplomacy skills still seemed up to par." There was a little quirky twist to his lips when he said that.

"Wait, hold up, Cas is starting to understand sarcasm?"

He started chuckling, "Apparently angels can be taught. Who knows, at the rate he's going he might become one of the funniest angels around in another century or two."

"Not sure I can handle this titanic shift in the universe. Cas with a sense of humor." I shook my head as I set the bags I was carrying down, "What next? Pigs flying?"

"I'll keep an eye out," he replied, completely straight faced.

"Probably a good idea." We headed straight to the kitchen, we hadn't eaten much on the way and I was starving. My usual sleeping and eating scheduled was already thrown off between the multiple naps and craziness of the last few days. Sam and I had pulled a twenty hour or so day when we got the vamps, I'd gotten about three or four hours of sleep before the nightmare, driven straight home which was another six hours, napped again, gotten into a fight, got another three hours of sleep and drove six more hours back to the Bunker. We'd headed out to get the vamps on Wednesday, it was now early evening on Friday and between the emotional crap, lack of sleep and the pain from the fight I was feeling like a train had hit me, backed up and ran over me again just to make sure it'd done a good job. Then I remembered that this was what I'd felt like most of the time I'd hunted. No wonder I'd been such a dick to people. "Oliver and his crew still coming tomorrow, or the day after. Sorry, lost track of who said what when."

"Tomorrow morning, early. Roy,Dig and Oliver are all coming."

He looked as crappy as I was feeling. "Have you slept at all?"

"Kind of, spent some time going through Magnus's stuff, found some more useful things. Here let me..."

"Stop." Coyote said, she'd taken over making sandwiches, since I was still trying to get my hands to move, "Sam, go lay down till Cas gets here. Dean can look through everything while you nap. Then after Cas gets here and we get him all caught up all of us need to pass the hell out for a few hours. You two look like shit already and this has barely started. We can't do anything till Oliver gets here anyway, I assume Cas can man the phones and email list while we get some shut eye.

He stood there, looking wierdly shy and kind of wistful.

"Just do it man, she brought a whole bag of herbs with her, you either pass out voluntarily or she'll make you pass out one way or the other. I've been Shaman roofied twice over the last day or so, and one time I didn't even drink tea."

That earned me a cold stare from her, "Roofied? Really?"

"Uh, cared for using..."

She crossed her arms, crap. "Nope, you're not digging yourself out of that one."

"Shit. Can I plead mental exhaustion?"

"Love to help with that, but don't want you feeling violated somehow."

Sam took stock of the situation and figured out his course of action, "You know, a nap sounds like a great idea right about now."

"Thanks for the help, bitch."

He smiled,"Anytime, jerk." He turned to head down the hall, then stopped. "Oh, room 30 is bigger than yours. I wrestled another bed in there and got some king sized sheets and a comforter for it. It's all set up for you guys."

Coyote smiled and dropped the cranky act, "Thanks Sam, we appreciate it."

He gave a half shrug, "No reason for you two to squeeze onto a twin. All the stuff Felicity's tracked down is in my email. It's up. See ya all in an hour or so."

"Yup."

He disappeared down the hall. Coyote and I finished our food, I got his laptop and started digging through emails and links. Coyote took our stuff down to our room and unpacked.

"Hey Babe?" She said as she walked back in from doing all that, "We need ammo for the guns. I packed what I had but there wasn't a lot. You said Sam has stuff in the armory."

"Yeah, not sure how much he's got for 45s though, he's using 9mils mostly now. I'll ask him when he gets up."

"Okay, so fill me in." She ran her hand along my back as she settled in the chair next to me.

"Well, four of our friends from the jacked up hunt were still close to there as of yesterday but who knows where they are now. She has a bunch of names but most of them don't pop up on anything less than a year old. They've gone off the grid. Not sure if that's usual for monsters or not, we never tracked vamps using credit cards before. I'd venture a guess that since they all seemed to have disappeared from the records at the same time that it's one of two things, they were all turned around then or they're under orders to pay cash and use fake names, you know, like hunters do."

"That's not disconcerting."

"No, not at all," I added, "And I don't think Sam's actually slept a damn wink since we left. Look at these emails, non stop to other hunters, Felicity, Roy. Damn. He's basically running a complete hunter network from here pretty much on his own. On the one hand it's amazing, on the other it's a serious issue right now. Like he said, we don't know who's who. I can guarantee you half these people have no real clue about internet security and probably have this shit open on their phone or computers all the damn time. A monster grabs a laptop or a phone and we're screwed, if we're not already. I'm half tempted to tell him to just tell everyone radio silence and only communicate by phone or in person, no mass emails until we clear this shit up."

"It's not like that would be a new thing for hunters. It's not a bad idea."

"On the less paranoia inducing front, I found some more useful tips from our exiled Men of Letters. He'd created a pendant that would heat up in the presence of supernatural creatures, it wasn't specific, just told you that you were standing next to something not human. That'd be nice to have, it takes a few days though. One of those long, complicated, stars must align kind of things so not sure it's feasible. He also talked about extinct monsters, or monsters that had been deemed extinct but he wasn't buying the party line on that either. The one he was fixated on was a different form of werewolf, one that actually turned into a wolf whenever the hell it wanted to. Fortunately silver still works."

She'd leaned back in her chair, I saw her mind spinning, trying to make connections just like I was. "And unfortunately?"

"They kill like wolves too, as in eat the whole thing. Makes them hard to find. No heartless corpses laying around." Problem was, Sam had found something, he hadn't had time to really delve into it but as soon as I'd seen it my hunter sense started tingling.

"He found something didn't he?"

"Yeah. According to Magnus about seventy years ago some old school hunters took out a a pack of them. The Men of Letters refused to believe the hunters when they said it was a different species of wolf, they chalked it up to some weird cultural thing. The hunters had tracked a bunch of people who'd disappeared out in a national park. The locals said they'd been seeing non local wolves moving around, they were bigger and looked different. One thing led to another and the hunters managed to take out four, the disappearances stopped. Magnus was kind of obsessed about it. Anyway, Sam being Sam, he'd started looking for reports of weird wolves over the last fifty years. There are quite a few, and even some half decent pics. Now I'm not a biologist but that's not your average wolf." I shifted the laptop so she could get a better look.

Her eyes got wide and she leaned forward. "I've seen wolves up close, not on the Reservation. I went to Yellowstone a few times and yeah, that's not a wolf. The musculature is different, wolves don't have those types of shoulders, those would move more like a cat's shoulders, not a wolf. It's bigger too, a lot bigger. Any recent reports?"

I enlarged a tab on the screen, "One could say that." Two people had disappeared from a local wildlife preserve in Oklahoma about a month back. Local wildlife experts said they spotted wolf tracks. Problem was there's not really any reliable reports of wolves in Oklahoma except for a smaller species that's rarely seen, whatever had made these tracks had to be around a hundred and eighty pounds and closer to the size of a mountain lion. The park was less than a hundred miles from where I'd been forced to kill Kate.

She exhaled nice and slow as she kicked into analytical mode, "So now we have a possible new species of wolf that can blend even better than then ones we know of, along with possible shifters, and a vamp/wolf alliance that may be organized by a former hunter."

"Seems that way. Here I was thinking that the height of my paranoia induced behaviors was reached during the Leviathan fiasco when we were being hunted by the Feds. Who knew it could possibly get worse than that?

I heard footsteps on the stairs leading down from the outside door, "I think the more valid question is, knowing your history Dean, why you would be at all surprised something like this would occur."

Cas's gravely voice filled the room, I looked up and there he was, trenchcoat and all. "Hi Cas. Not surprised, just annoyed."

He made it the rest of the way down the stairs and stood in front of us. "Yes, I can see that. It seems your year off has benefitted you, your usual response to something like this tends to be much more forceful." He studied me, his blue eyes getting even brighter and sharper. Cas never just looks at someone, he's always seeing things on multiple layers so he studies you, makes you feel like a bug under a microscope most of the time. Other times it's just damn uncomfortable because you know he's seeing all the dark corners and hidden things that you don't even let see the light of day. When Coyote does her Shaman gaze on me and goes full power with it, there's always this spinning, swirling feeling like the world stopped and you're about to fly off of it. She may be gifted with some psychic abilities but she's still human, Cas is an angel and you know it the minute he looks at you. Other angels hid it better, but even then, when they chose to focus on me I always felt small, powerless. Something deep down inside knows, just knows that no matter what the outside looks like, what's behind that human shell can utterly destroy you in a second, without hesitation or remorse. Same with demons. Two sides of the same coin as far as I'm concerned.

"You look well, happy, considering." He was still standing on the opposite of the table, all stiff and awkward. It wasn't that he was feeling awkward, he just was.

"You're going to make me do all the work here aren't you?"

His forehead wrinkled and he tilted his head to one side, "No, I have come to help you."

I gave up, stood up and started walking around the table. When I was halfway towards him he got it.

"Oh, yes. I forgot." He opened his arms as I pulled him towards me. "It has been some time since we've seen each other. A hug would be in order."

I patted his back once or twice and let go, "Yeah, it kind of would. Nice to see you."

"You as well." Then he turned his focus to Coyote who seemed a bit disappointed but she reached her hand out.

"I'm Running Coyote, I've heard a lot about you. Pleasure to meet you."

He took her hand and shook it but his eyes never left her face, "I have never met a follower of the lost spirits before. You are unlike the other pagan priests. You are truly Godless yet there is an air of the divine about you. I always assumed those spirits who had claimed you as children were much weaker."

She stood there, not sure if she was supposed to be offended, flattered or what. I had no clue either.

"You are not very impressed by me I see," he continued.

"Well, to be honest, I expected to have a splitting headache or be blinded by your energy but there's nothing to you. I sense a weird hum of something but nothing all that shocking."

That threw me off. I guess I should have known something was up when she didn't instantly react to him walking in the door.

"Oh, yes. If you wish to see my energy as you call it I can arrange that. I am not sure you should though."

"Yeah, good point." I said, not quite sure why I hadn't thought about this before. "He blinded a psychic once. Wait, how are you muting yourself out?"

"Sam's informed me of Running Coyote's skills and we took steps to protect her. He and I dug through the vaults here and found an old relic that has an ancient form of angel warding on it. It reflects the divine energy away from talented humans."

"Is it locking your power down?" If that was the case I wasn't sure he'd be much help if we had to protect Coyote from being blinded by seeing him.

"Not at all. Here." He put his finger on my forehead. All the pain just left, my face felt normal sized again and my hands returned to their normal, non swollen, selves.

Coyote's mouth dropped wide open, "Whoa, okay, now I'm impressed."

I gave her smart ass grin, now that I could again without it hurting, "Roofie free healing, pretty cool huh?"

She scowled at me and looked at Cas, "If I break his face again, you'll heal it, right?"

"I don't understand, why would you want to break his face again?"

"For being a jackass, that's why."

Cas reached across the table, took hold of her hands and gave her one of the most sincere looks I'd ever seen him pull off, "Running Coyote, if you intend to break his face every time he is, as you say, a jackass, we won't be able to get much else done. Perhaps you should reconsider this course of action."

I tried, I really, really did because he was being so serious but I couldn't help it. Tears started running down my face as I collapsed into the chair laughing. Coyote held out a second longer.

"You," she stopped to push the laugh back down, "Are the most," the giggles had started and she had to rush the rest out, "adorable being I have ever met." The she bent over and rested her head on his hands because she was laughing so hard she couldn't stay upright.

"I was being quite serious," he said.

"Oh, ow, my stomach." I managed to get out in between gasping for air. "We know Cas, we know. I appreciate the sentiment, but I promise, she won't break my face."

"But...oh, I see. This is something that relates to how you show affection. I understand now. I apologize, you being in a relationship with someone other than Sam will take some adjustment on my part."

Coyote had just about gotten things back under control until he said that, "Oh wow, he and Sam aren't..." she couldn't even finish.

"Honey, just go with it. Trust me. You'll get a Cas filter soon enough."

She snorted, took a deep breath and managed to calm down. "I'll work on that."

I glanced up at Cas, for a second there, just a second I thought I caught a hint of humor in his eyes but then he saw me looking and it vanished. Had he just played that whole bit up to get us to relax? Maybe he'd learned a few things over the last year, just like I had.

"All right, back to business," Coyote said, "I should probably see if I can handle you without that relic Cas, just in case something happens to it."

I wasn't too keen on that idea, "Are you sure about that? I wasn't joking about the being blinded part."

She'd gone all solemn and down to business again, "Better to know now then when things are much more dire."

"I cannot heal that damage Running Coyote," Cas warned. "If you are blinded you will remain that way for the rest of your life."

"I'll shut all my perceptions down at first and slowly open them up, if it gets too intense I'll back off. When I shut down I shouldn't be able to really perceive much at all. I've had a lot of practice blocking over the years. Oh and once we're done with that and have some time, I want you to explain the whole lost spirits comment."

"Of course. Let me know when you are prepared."

She nodded and her eyes went slightly out of focus. I didn't notice anything but it was obvious that Cas did. He leaned a little closer to her and was in full angelic examination mode when she nodded.

"Go for it."

He pulled a small, rough hewn stone pendant that was hanging from a strip of leather out from under his shirt and slowly lifted it over his head, then laid it down on the table but kept his hand hovering over it.

She hissed and lurched back in her chair, "What the..."

Her eyes started jumping around, not convulsively but like she was trying to keep track of something moving or just take in a sight that she had had no way to prepare for.

"Honey, you okay?"

She barely nodded, she was too caught up in what she was seeing, "It's, you, are so beautiful."

That seemed to catch Cas off guard, "Thank you. That's not what most humans think when they perceive what I am. I find you quite fascinating as well. How your electromagnetic fields shifted as you closed down your perceptions was something I had never seen before. Most humans with abilities such as yours lack that control."

There was more than a hint of sorrow on her face when she replied, "I wish you could have met my teacher, Rising Dove. He was, well, a master, a true Shaman. Not like me, I have the skills but lack the patience."

I was going to blast that idea out of the water but Cas beat me to it.

"No master starts out filled with patience and fully enlightened. Many of the greatest saints came from lives filled with sin and blasphemy. Then there are angels such as I who thought we were enlightened until we started associating with people who, just as yourself, perceived only their flaws, not their gifts. Do you wish to try to perceive more? I am not sensing that my energy is harming you in any way. You're not looking at my true form technically, so perhaps you will be safe. Pamela, if you remember Dean, was compelling me to show her my true form, that was the source of her blinding."

"How are you seeing so much if you're shut down?" I asked.

"I don't think I could ever block someone like Cas out completely. I saw the demons too remember? Saw what they were."

"Oh, yeah." I could tell she wanted to, she'd always had that curious streak and, just like Sam and I, once she found something she was interested it, she had to find out everything she could.

"Maybe a little bit more." Her face stilled again, but her eyes didn't go out of focus as she started chanting under her breath. She made it another ten seconds before she screamed and violently twisted away, "I can't stop!"

Cas threw the necklace back over his head and backed away, I caught her as she fell out of the chair. "Shit! Coyote!"

"The walls! The wards! It's so bright! Dean! I can't control it!"

Next thing I knew Cas was behind her, his set his hand on her head and she went limp. "She will be fine."

"How the hell do you know that?"

"Because she was not incurring injury, she was just unable to pull back. It appears that once she truly started perceiving my celestial energy she was pulled along with it. I am part of angelic collective of many parts. I think she started to get absorbed into that. My making her sleep it will reset her perceptions. She reminds me of the ancient mystics, she can join with many different resonances. Her teacher must have been powerful indeed if she feels she is somehow inferior to him. I swear to you, she will wake up soon and be fine."

I couldn't quite believe it until I saw it but he sounded pretty damn confident. "All right, thanks for stepping in there."

"Of course. Where is Sam?"

"Sleeping. Go wake him up while I get her somewhere comfortable. He can catch you up, I'm staying with her until she wakes up."

"I assure you.."

"Cas!" Damn, I was already snapping at people, I took a second, "Sorry. Lack of sleep and I'm worried. I'm staying with her."

He nodded and his eyes softened, "Of course."

I shifted her in my arms and picked her up.

"I'll open the door for you." Cas offered.

"Thanks, room thirty. It's bigger, Sam fixed it up for us."

Cas walked in front of me as I carried her down the hall. He opened the door, I took her in and laid her on the bed.

"Dean?" His voice barely carried.

"Yeah?"

"I am happy for you both. You have more than earned the right to have a person such as her by your side."

"Thank you." I wasn't sure what else to say to that.

He nodded, "I'll wake Sam." Then he softly closed the door and left us alone.


	8. Alternate Perceptions

True to his word, she started shifting around and opened her eyes about twenty minutes later.

"Ow, my head," she groaned.

I was lying next to her, her head was on my chest and I'd kept the room dark. I was figuring she'd probably be feeling like the morning after an all night bender, so the less light the better. "Hon, you all right?"

"I can see so that's a start," she whispered, "Once the jackhammer stops bashing my brains in I'll have a better answer for you."

"I'll get some aspirin for you. Did you unpack my bathroom stuff?" I was damn happy she was able to form complete sentences, I'd seen way too many humans that didn't take too well to seeing any hint of an angel's true nature. Most of them either had their brains turn to mush or suffered some sort of permanent damage. If she could joke she must not be too bad off.

"Yeah."

"All right," There was enough light coming in under the door that I could make my way to the bathroom and feel along the wall for the light switch. I made sure to close the door before I clicked it on, the light made me wince seeing as how I'd been in pretty much complete darkness for a good chunk of time. She'd set all our toothbrushes and stuff on the sink and had put the aspirin bottle on the counter along with some of her herb packets. Guess she'd been planning on dosing me some more, I wouldn't be needing all that anymore thanks to Cas, but she did. I sort of wished the water in the sink got hot enough to make her some tea, get her back for knocking me out, but luke warm tea is just nasty. I grabbed three aspirins, a glass of water and headed back to the bed. I clicked the light off before I walked out, waited for my eyes to re-adjust to the darkness and handed her the glass and pills. "Here you go."

"Thanks Babe." She downed them pretty quick, handed me the glass and settled back down on the bed. Once I put the glass on the nightstand I curled up next to her and breathed a huge sigh of relief. It's not that I didn't think Cas knew what he was talking about, but hearing her scream in pain cut deep. I was really wishing there was a way I could send her back home or convince her to stay in the Bunker but that was a battle I'd never win, the only way she'd stay out of harm's way was if she felt there was a damn good reason to. Me being worried wouldn't cut it.

We just laid there in silence for a while, "I think everything still works," she said in a stronger voice this time. The pain must be clearing. "Let me look at you."

"Don't push yourself, no reason to rush this." Last thing I needed was to take her back home damaged in some way.

She rolled over, guess you don't need light to see someone's Warrior Spirit. "This is basic, if I can't do this then we know that something's wrong. I just want to get it over with."

"All right."

I couldn't really make out her face, but I felt her tense up and the air seemed to get heavier. That happened sometimes when she was using her skills, but not usually when she was just reading someone. Maybe because we were so close together I noticed it more.

She relaxed, "It took a bit to get there but I think that's just the headache making it hard to focus. I seem to be fine though."

I tightened my arm around her and kissed the top of her head, "Good. Hey, what did you see? The only time I've seen Cas not in human shape was when he pulled me from Hell but it's not the best of memories. Since I was on the way to becoming a demon I was terrified of him, he was all glowing and righteously smiting everything around me."

I felt her nestle closer to me, "I don't even know how to describe it. I've never seen anything like him. When I was looking with everything closed down, there was this cloud of light around him, like how people describe auras but it wasn't just one color, it was all of them and every shade in between."

"Huh, whenever he glows because he's throwing angel power around he's blinding white."

"Well, the color white is made up of all the colors of the spectrum so it makes sense that when he uses his powers and makes them visible to normal eyes you would see white. It wasn't just a cloud of light hanging there though. He, or his power, or whatever, was constantly in motion, like waves." She stopped talking and I got the feeling she was searching for words. "Then when I opened up a bit more I saw...everything." Her voice had finally hit that awestruck pitch, I guess she was starting to process the fact that she'd seen an angel, "I saw the wards on the walls, which is something I don't usually see, I saw the walls, you, the air and I saw how it was all connected, how he's connected. What, or who he is, was connected to something so expansive that for a second there I felt like an ant getting washed away by a flood. I couldn't stop myself from being pulled in, then I blacked out."

"Actually, he put you to sleep." She pulled away from me and I could just make out her face, shocked didn't even cover it.

"He can do that?"

I laughed, "Not sure why that's shocking, he healed me after all."

"I didn't feel anything, one second I was in pain, the next I was waking up."

"Yeah, good thing he can't teleport anymore. That will really throw a kink in your system."

"Teleport?"

"Yeah, the angels used to be able to fly, they weren't really teleporting but they move so fast it seemed like they were. Then Metatron caused them all to fall and they lost their wings. They go back and forth from here and Heaven using portals now I guess. That was the same night Sam and I decided not to close the gates to Hell. The following year or two sucked a hell of a lot of ass, even for us." Her and I had chatted some about all that but it wasn't something I liked to dwell on much.

I watched her put that information in the timeline of my life that was stored in her head, "I can't really imagine that, Cas must have been devastated, all of them must have been."

"You could say that. Do you need some more rest or are you up to walking? I can make you some tea if your head still hurts."

Her smile broke up the darkness, "Trying to knock me out?"

"Not at all, just trying to help."

"Uh-huh, I think I can walk. Thanks though."

I heard a small hiss as she slowly sat up, "Really hope he keeps that necklace on when I'm around him though. Damn." She slid to the side of the bed, stood up and opened the door. "Let's see what's going on."

"All right." I joined her and slid my arm around her waist. By the time we got back to the main room she'd stopped leaning on me for support but I didn't let her go. She'd been supporting me in one way or other for the last year, it was kind of nice to be able to do the same for her finally.


	9. Cat, Mouse, Dean

Sam and Cas were hunched over the laptop, Sam's hair was looking more shaggy than usual. One of these days, me and a pair of clippers. Maybe I could drug him using Coyote's teas. "Hey," I said as we walked in.

"Hey," Sam answered without moving, "I noticed the articles you had up. You think?"

"I think. Me and coincidences, you know how I feel about' em."

"Yeah. Great."

Cas turned around, "Are you all right Running Coyote?"

She nodded and smiled, "Yes and just call me Coyote."

I had a random thought, "Hey, question. Cas said you had found that pendant earlier thinking it would protect Coyote but this is the first time we've been here when he's here. How'd you know she'd need it?"

He shrugged while clicking through some more emails, "Made sense, she can see our Warrior Spirits and has visions. It's only logical that seeing an angel would hit her pretty hard. Honestly it was a stray thought I had when I was bored a few months back and went digging. From what Cas said it turned out to be a good thing."

"It did indeed." She said. Her arm dropped away from my waist as she moved towards him to give him a tight hug. "Thanks for thinking ahead."

He finally moved to put his arms around her waist and gave me a smirk, "Well someone has to."

"Yeah, yeah." I pulled a chair out across from him, shifted a lamp so it wasn't in my line of sight and met his eyes, "So let's talk."

"Right, so everyone has hunkered down and is safe for now. I am still having my researchers watch for jobs to see if anything new pops up in the places Felicity has tracked our friends to. I agree with Oliver's idea of bait hunters but we need volunteers for that."

Coyote sat down to my right and Cas moved his chair to the end so he could see all three of us at once, "Let's backtrack," I started. "With my crazy ass dreams, the fight back home and the driving we've been sort of scattered. First off, Coyote brought this up back home, Tom and Sarah, anyone actually get eyes on them to verify this whole thing?"

Sam shook his head, "Not yet."

"Okay, same with Gerald, he was by himself right?"

"Yes."

I didn't know for sure shifters were involved but I wanted to establish a ground zero. "Let's pick a group of hunters we trust, get them all together somewhere and test every last one of them. That way we know, at least for right now, everyone is who they say they are. I want Sarah and Gerald there, Sarah will want to kill something after losing Tom like that."

"Agreed."

"Dean," Cas said, "There is no need to test them, Coyote or I can look at them and tell you."

"Keeping the fact that you're an angel and she's a Shaman under wraps as much as possible Cas. You don't hunt with Sam, he and Roy have been avoiding demons so I'm hoping against hope right now that the monsters don't know what you are." And even more hoping that demons weren't involved. "Some of the hunters know what Coyote is but even at that they don't know what she can do."

Cas's eyes narrowed, I could tell he was trying to come up with some sort of reference to show he understood and was one of the cool humans. "Oh, like in Lord of the Rings when Gandalf throws his cloak off and is wearing white instead of grey? I still don't quite understand why the white cloak and change of name made him more powerful."

I wasn't sure which was more unexpected, that he'd seen Lord of the Rings or how he could miss the obvious similarities between he and Gandalf; long lived, powerful beings who sometimes miss the big hints and make bad choices. Sam was trying to hide a smile so I had a feeling there'd been a Bunker movie night I'd missed. That must have been damn entertaining. "Uh, yeah. Exactly." Which made Cas break out with the "See I do understand you odd humans," look. He always seemed so proud of himself when he made what he thought was an awesome connection to pop culture. I never can bring myself to burst his bubble on that, although he was getting better with them. Coyote faked a cough to cover her laugh and I soldiered on. "Think we can set that up for tomorrow somewhere close by? I want Oliver and the rest hiding in the wings just in case something goes sideways."

The smile left Sam's face, "Yeah, there's that old barn west of here that will work. I'll send out...

"No," I interrupted, "That's the other thing. For now, no mass emails. Call people, talk to them. We don't know who's got a laptop or phone or if someone's hacked in. Let's just ratchet up the paranoia and pretend everyone's after us. You know, like the good ol's days."

That got him from serious to deadly serious in about five seconds, "Shit. Good news is we can use it to send misinformation out though if we think it's compromised."

"Nice touch." Had to give him credit, "Any way Felicity can see if it's been hacked?"

He frowned, "Probably not. With all the burner phones hunters use who knows how many ip addresses hit this thing on a daily basis."

"Crap. Okay. Not sure if you want to go radio silent or just act normal but lay plans in the background, but nothing about what we're doing or where we're going gets out unless we want it to."

"Got it."

"Next on the list, those monster detection pendants you mentioned. How complicated we talking other than time?"

"Not very, the ritual is in Latin, not Enochian or Sumerian so not too hard to say. We have all the ingredients, even the iron, it needs to be as close to 100% iron as possible. Good thing I bought nails a few weeks back."

All of a sudden I felt like I was living a twisted fairy tale, "Iron? What are we doing, chasing fairies?"

"Lore says supernatural things don't like iron. I would have figured silver since that's what kills them but I'm not going to argue the point. I think it's just a broad spectrum thing anyway. Hell, it could go off when Cas is around."

There are a lot of creatures out there and I'd be jumpy enough without something warning me of a Djinn, pagan god or angel when all I really needed to know about was vamps, weres and maybe a shifter. "Skip it then. Cas, Coyote or silver will work I guess. If we're not sure and it attacks, let's just go with cut it's head off and check the teeth later."

He raised an eyebrow and nodded, "Beheading, the all purpose solution to random attacks."

"It's how I survived Purgatory, don't knock it."

"Can't argue with you there."

"Thanks." His eyes lost focus for a second, "What's on your mind?"

"That vamp stuff you found. We could soak bullets in it, or try loading some shotgun shells with it."

"Nice." Now that would come in handy. The tricky part with vamps has always been having to get close to take them out. If we could shoot them and drop them it would make things a helluva a lot easier.

"Hmm," Coyote said, "I saw a vid where people loaded nails into shotgun shells. You put a small amount of that liquid in the shell, put the nails in, then seal it. That way you know it will pierce their skin and go right into the blood stream. It won't mess up your barrel like bullets dipped in it would."

Sam definitely liked that idea, "Perfect."

"All right, let's go with that." I remembered something, "Huh, I think I still have a box of silver .45 bullets under my bed. 9mils are nice and all but I like my gun."

Sam sighed, "Guess quiet's out of the picture."

"Hey, a 45 is intimidating."

"Yeah, to people," he countered.

"And to werewolves."

He gave up, "Whatever."

"Any news on Gordon?"

"No."

I took a good long look at the three of them, one of those random flare ups of anger stirred deep down inside. I really didn't want to cat and mouse this crap for weeks, I've never liked hidden enemies.

Sam recognized the look, "Dean..."

"We need to find a hunt and make a statement. I'm not chasing shadows. If Gordon's involved I want him out in the open as soon as possible. If we're on a list, let's make it real easy for people to find us. Oliver said we need to draw these assholes out, you and I are the quickest way to do that Sam. Gordon's not going to care about the rest if we piss him off enough."

Cas's eyes turned to blue tinted stone, "Dean, while I appreciate the sentiment, is that the wisest course? It seems like you're repeating your previous patterns, I thought you had decided not to continue to do that."

Coyote was studying me, "Babe, not saying you're off base here but check your motives."

"Here's my theory, the longer this goes on, the higher the chance is that we lose more hunters. I give it a week, maybe two, before they start getting restless and go out on their own. These aren't military types that are used to following orders. They listened yesterday because this came out of nowhere but they're all smart and at some point will start making their own plans. I think what you said was right, that we stumbled into something the monsters weren't ready for us to see yet. If we keep moving fast we may catch them off guard. If nothing else, if we take steps, the other hunters may be willing to sit and wait."

The three of them exchanged some pretty intense looks. Cas's eyes lost some of their hardness first, then Sam started nodding and Coyote seemed to relax.

"It's worth running by Oliver and the rest," Sam said. "If they're on board we could do some serious damage fast."

"That's what I'm thinking." I was tired of sitting and talking, "Let's test this whole nails in shotgun shells idea. After that I'm tuning up Baby. You pick about ten hunters we can trust who are close and get them here by tomorrow night."

"On it."

"Cool. Are the nails in that junk drawer or the kitchen?"

"I have them in the armory, I was building some shelves."

"Well that makes it easy. You call, I'll meet you there." I pointed at Cas and Coyote, "You guys make up the vamp killing stuff. Sam can show you the recipe. Make about a gallon of it. We'll need it."

"All right," Coyote said.

I got up and made my way to the armory. I was committed to this now, I could feel it. That restlessness I'd felt for years when I was drifting on the road started taking root again. I had to move, to hunt. I just hoped at the end of it, it wouldn't take me months to settle back down. As I opened the door to the armory and saw the weapons, a shot of adrenaline went through me. Just like old times, damn it.


	10. Loose Arrows

I really didn't want to get out of bed. Sam and I had gotten the vamp death juice laced nails to work in the shells, I'd tuned up Baby, Sam got ten hunters to hit the road and then we'd all passed out. All of us except Cas, Sam had set him up with the Iron Man movies and some research ideas for him to delve into once he got bored watching Robert Downey Jr fly around. I got the impression that Cas wasn't all that impressed with Iron Man's suit. Why would he be? Cas used to be able to do all that without a suit.

We hadn't set alarms since Oliver was going to text us when landed which would give us plenty of time to get functioning. My phone had gone off, I rolled over and glared at it.

"Landed, see you soon."

"Already? Damn." I set the phone back down and closed my eyes. Sam's two bed idea had made sleeping a lot more comfortable for Coyote and I but there wasn't a lot of room left over to maneuver in the room itself. We'd ended up shoving the bed to the corner to give us a small path to the door and bathroom. Coyote was sleeping closest to the wall, I don't do well being penned in between a wall and a person. I don't like having someone in my way if I have to shoot something or move fast.

"Wasn't that our cue to get up?" Coyote asked.

"In theory, yes." Two or three more hours of sleep seemed in order.

"You really are a cranky bastard when you hunt aren't you. I don't remember you being this grumpy when we used to hook up."

"That's because I was in vacation mode when I was with you, no reason to be cranky. Now you're seeing me in all my pissy, grouchy, feeling sorry for myself hunter mode. It passes, usually after a half pot of coffee and some good tunes. The mornings are always the worst."

I felt her slide closer to me, then her chest pressed into my back and she ran her hand down my chest. "Maybe we can jump start that process."

Things were looking better already. I reached back and slid my hand along her leg, "Shower? Get dirty while cleaning up?"

Her hand slid down lower, ducking inside my sweats. That definitely improved my mood, "I'll take that as a yes."

She pressed down harder, shifted her leg over me and rolled completely over me, "Last one there has to wash my hair," she said with a smirk while launching herself off the bed and shoving me back into the mattress.

It was a rather nice view watching her dash into the bathroom, I actually love playing with her hair so I didn't move all that fast. We worked out the rather complicated geometry required for two people around six feet tall to successfully have sex in a shower that's designed to hold one person. Shower sex is always fun, plus there's no annoying wet spots to deal with afterwards. By the time we'd gotten dressed and made it to the kitchen, I was definitely in a much better frame of mind, which was probably good because Cas looked like he had back during the Apocalypse days. All business and in full soldier mode.

"What happened?" Coyote asked.

"I received this via an email," Cas said, "Just a few minutes ago. I sent it to Felicity so she could verify it as much as possible. Sam instructed me if anything odd came over to have her check on it. Watch."

He clicked on a video, but even before he had I already knew what I was going to see, the frame it had stopped on showed a bloody room and the back of Gordon's head. Cas pushed the slider bar back to the beginning of the video and hit play.

Shayna was tied to a chair in an empty living room in what looked like a foreclosed house. The roof was caving in and the wall had holes in them. The camera zoomed in close to her battered and barely recognizable face. She'd fought and fought hard. As the camera pulled back it panned across her chest and arms, there was barely an inch that wasn't covered in blood or bruises, he'd sliced her up and taken his sweet ass time doing it. I could feel Coyote tensing up next to me, I didn't even bother going cold with rage, I just took it all in, memorizing every damn wound, every violation of her he'd done. That way I could repay the favor when I caught up to him, I'd even add a few more in for kicks.

The camera turned around and there was Gordon, that's when my anger kicked in. He bared his fangs, yup, pure vampire teeth. No shifter could do that, or at least I hoped they couldn't. Then he raised a blade and all my lingering doubts faded. It was all black, made out of obsidian, just like my blade in Purgatory had been. Rough hewn, tied together and sharp as hell. It had to be him, the only people that would make blades like that were people who'd been there. In Purgatory you and whatever weapon you had become one, you never, ever set that damn thing down. His eyes were dead and filled with bloodlust all at the same time. He was far, far, gone. It wasn't an issue any longer on how he got out of Purgatory, all that mattered was sending him back.

"Heya Dean, Sam. Long time, no see." There was no emotion in his voice, nothing, not even hate. "Dean, sorry I missed you in Purgatory. We could have some fun you and I," his lip curled into a snarl, that's when I heard it, he's need for the kill. "You made quite a stir down there though, a human showing up, teaming up with a vamp, getting him out. Gave the rest of us some ideas. Took a while, turns out there's not a lot of humans that can survive any length of time down there. We had to go through a lot actually," Then he laughed, it was hollow, mocking and sick, "Good thing you and Sam broke the world so badly that we managed to find Reapers who didn't give a shit about humans and were willing to deal." He shook his head, "They should have listened to me, the hunters, about you and Sam. You fuckers are walking Apocalypses. We should have killed you, burned your asses up and scattered what was left. So, since they didn't listen, I've decided they're part of the problem and have to pay too." He pulled the camera closer so his face filled the screen, "All of them. I'm a monster now, but you know what? We monsters have done less damage then you Winchesters did so maybe we should run the place now. So here you go guys, here's a preview of what's to come. Reckoning, Purgatory style."

He took his time severing her head from her body. She was still alive when he started, I let her screams wash over me as he sawed at her neck. Blood shot out from her throat, covering his face, he stopped sawing and drank his fill. Then he tilted his head back and laughed, "Ahh yeah, the taste. I never indulged before, you two saw to that didn't you."

Her hair had been tied up in a pony tail that was sitting along her right shoulder, the blood stained it even darker red. She stopped screaming and twitching long before he was through. I saw the life leave her eyes as they went out of focus for the last time. Her head finally dropped to the ground. He looked back towards the camera, "Be seeing you two soon." Then his bloody finger touched the screen and the recording stopped.

I should be feeling something, anything but I wasn't, not yet. "Cas, was this sent from her email?"

"Yes."

"Sam see it yet?"

"No, I was waiting to hear from Felicity."

"Is he up?"

"No."

I turned around, avoided looking at Coyote and walked down the hall. I didn't even knock on Sam's door, just opened it. He was finishing getting dressed, "Get out here now. Shayna's dead and Gordon's alive. It's him. Move it."

I watched as he went from still half asleep to wide awake and pissed in record time, "What? How?"

"Don't ask questions, just get out here."

He wasn't more than two steps behind me when we got back to the table. Coyote's fists were clenched, but she'd hid most of everything else she was feeling for now.

"This would not be a good morning," Cas said once Sam was close enough. "Felicity just replied that it is authentic. Watch."

He restarted the video at the same time both Sam's and my phones went off. I pulled mine out and saw it was Oliver. "They're here. I'll get the door. You watch that, I want us to be thinking while they watch it."

Shayna's screams reached my ears again just as I put my hands on the doorknob. The distance didn't diminish the level of pain they encompassed. She hadn't broke, I'd seen it in her eyes, he'd gotten nothing from her, at least verbally. He didn't need to though, he had her phone. Now there was another orphaned hunter kid for Krissy to help and Gordon could read everything we'd been up to. I still wasn't feeling anything, wasn't sure if that was good or bad. There was a knock on the door, I pulled it open and Oliver's eyes shifted from neutral to worried to deadly as soon as he saw me.

"Who died?" He asked.

"Hunter named Shayna. She died bloody. Gordon sent his last email."

Roy and Dig were behind Oliver, "He's dead?" Roy asked.

"He was the second I saw the vid. The fact that's he's still breathing is just a technicality. Come on down." I stepped to the side so they could walk past. Even after all these years Dig was still the military guy. He didn't go cold like Oliver and I, it takes a special kind of hell to warp a man to react like we do. Dig was a pro who still managed to hold onto an ideal that he was doing the right thing, fighting for hope, love or country. Oliver and I fought simply because we knew that the things we fought, or in my case, killed were worse than us, or that's what we told ourselves. Today though, I couldn't even be that noble. Gordon was going to die because I hated his deranged, fucked up ass. It was that simple.

Sam's back was to me but I didn't need to see his face, he was right there with me. His shoulders and neck were tight, his right hand was gripping the back of Cas's chair so tight I could almost hear the creaking of the wood from the stairs. Coyote had disappeared, I wasn't quite sure where to until she reappeared with six beers. It definitely wasn't a coffee morning. She handed one to Sam, set the others on the table, popped the lid off of hers and took a long ass drink.

"Bit early isn't it?" Roy asked.

"You'll need it, trust me," she explained.

Oliver, Roy and Dig set their bags down. Oliver grabbed a beer and nodded at Cas and Sam. "Catch us up."

"Not much new except that I am pretty damn sure this is Gordon and not a shifter," I said. "Watch the vid, I'll explain why."

Cas stood up, "I've seen it enough times. If you'll excuse me."

Cas wasn't the type to get squeamish about a bloody death, he'd been party to plenty of them over the years. I watched him as he walked away, "Sam? You good to show it to them?"

He didn't say anything, just nodded. Coyote's eyes shifted between me and the direction Cas had gone, I nodded to let her know I was going to check on him. She took a quick survey of the rest of us. "Not that any of us feel like eating but we probably should. I'll make something while you watch that."

She took her beer and went back to the kitchen. I followed Cas who was walking a lot faster than he usually does. He turned down the hall that led towards the garage, pulled the door open and put a hand out to brace himself against a wall as soon as he got through the threshold. His head was lowered, guilt clouding his face.

"Cas? You all right man?"

"My fault, this is my fault. He said we Dean, if he got out, could Leviathans?"

All of a sudden I could feel again, and it felt like someone had turned an ice cold shower on inside my veins. "Let's not make shit worse than it is. We've had no hints that they're around and Gordon coming back is both our faults, not just yours. The way Benny made it sound, that portal opened because I was there and Purgatory wasn't made for humans."

Cas looked up, and I saw the deep fear I was feeling reflected in his eyes, "What if it is still open? If they are getting Reapers to bring humans across. Dean..."

"One thing at a time, Cas. One thing at a damn time. If you want to check on Purgatory have Heaven do it. We need you here."

He got that martyred look, "I was the one that.."

"Brought them here. I know. I was there. Remember?" I could tell he was thinking about heading to Purgatory himself, who knew how long he'd be gone if he did that. "Stop, right there. Remember what you said to me about repeating patterns?"

"Yes."

"Good, if I have to stop being stupid, so do you."

I'd pushed a lot of his buttons over the years, but I'd never called him stupid. He didn't seem to like it too much but he refrained from straight out smiting me, "Stupid?"

"This is what always happens when we get in these messes. You go off, do your angel thing and never follow any damn plan that makes sense. You never listen to any input Sam and I might have. That's why Heaven got destroyed. You thought your angelic intelligence was somehow better than ours, but you got played and played hard by Metatron. I warned you." Cas and I had never really had it out about this, I'd been too busy mending fences with Sam and trying to stay sane to really sit down with Cas and deal with this crap. I wasn't mad at him, but he had to realize we needed to really work together this time. He couldn't just be popping in and out when he felt he needed to. I didn't really know what he'd been up to this last year, Sam hadn't talked about it much but it was time I found out. "Please Cas, trust me on this. Send out a message on angel radio, let them know what's up but stay here. If there's issues in Purgatory we'll handle it later."

He took his hand off the wall, straightened up and it dawned on me that, unlike me, he may not have been having the best of years. He looked tired, which in itself was weird, but beyond that he looked resigned and alone. "It is not as easy as "sending a message on angel radio" for me now. I have been declared exiled from Heaven and all angels. That is a small step above fallen. Hannah convinced them to take pity on me for my help in averting the Apocalypse and ending the Leviathan threat. Some few believed that it was not my intention to kill untold numbers of my fellow angels and allow Metatron to destroy us. If I feel there is some great threat to angels I am to relay it to a watcher, who will then inform the others. In no way am I to communicate using angel radio or seek assistance of fellow angels in any endeavors which include you or Sam. I have not spoken to or seen another angel in over a year. If I were to inform them that Leviathans have returned yet again, I doubt I will continue to be shown such mercy. Especially if the means of their return were connected to you."

Somehow angels and Heaven never, ever fail to piss me off. "What the fuck? Seriously? You're exiled! After all.."

"Yes!" He snapped, his voice echoing off the walls, "After all I have done. They could have killed me Dean, they would have been well within their rights to." He stopped talking, closed his eyes and calmed down. "All that aside, you may, indeed have a point. You were correct about Metatron's motives and I should have listened to you. So, because you have asked it, I will, as you say, follow your lead."

Knowing what he was going through, I felt like a jackass riding him so hard, but he had listened. Not that it made me feel any better. "Are you still connected to them? The angel collective."

He looked away, eyes lost in thought and endless regret, "Yes, I am still an angel after all. As long as I have Grace, I will feel their presence."

"But you can't.."

"No, I cannot interact with them in any way."

"Damn Cas, I'm sorry." I couldn't even imagine how I'd deal with that, an eternal, cosmic, silent treatment. "But you can turn it off, angel radio, right?"

"Yes, but that is only a small piece of the collective. I choose not to though."

"Why?" His eyes met mine again, and I really didn't need to hear the answer. I had my nightmares as penance for the shit I'd done, this was Cas's. I had the feeling that his penance would last a lot longer than mine. "Never mind, I get it."

"Good, I'd rather not dwell on it. Shall we return to the others?"

"Yeah." He turned and opened the door, "Cas?"

"Yes?"

"Thanks, for listening."

He didn't turn to face me, "I have reflected much over the last year on the concept of wisdom and I realized that nowhere in any of your religious writings were angels ever described as wise. Only men were. Angels were simply messengers, guardians, voices of the Lord. We were not created to think, to learn, to gain knowledge. We were merely instruments of another's wishes. You humans, for good or ill, can reason, think critically. I have longed ceased to think that in some way or other I am superior to you, none of us are. Perhaps it is time for me to realize the truth Dean, that I will always be what I was designed to be. A tool for others to use. If that is indeed the case, I would rather be used by you than God. You, at least, have never abandoned me."

I watched him leave, my brain had come to a dead stop. I couldn't think of a single thing to think, much less say to that. When I finally managed to get my brain moving again, the first thought I had was that he, I and Sam were going to have a very, very long talk. Before we could do that though we had to kill Gordon and possibly a crap ton of other monsters as well. If it's not one thing, it's another.

I caught up to him halfway down the hall, we didn't say anything else. I smelled eggs and bacon as we got closer to the main rooms. It's probably a rather large indication of just how jaded I am in some ways that my stomach actually growled once I got a good whiff of it. I'd just watched someone I knew get beheaded and still wanted something to eat. Roy however, wasn't the least bit interested in food. He wasn't exactly sick but he was a lot more affected by it than Oliver or I was. Oliver was mechanically eating from the plate in front of him. He was eating because he knew he needed the fuel for his body, not because he wanted to, Sam and Coyote were doing the same. Dig was picking at his food. I grabbed a plate, loaded it up and sat next to Coyote.

"We have ten hunters meeting us in about four hours," I told them. "We're testing to see if they're still human, then asking for volunteers for bait missions. Sam? I think you and I should take Oliver's crew out with us and make a statement, video it and email it back to Gordon. Let's call his ass out and see what pops up."

Sam didn't even blink, "Take Baby? Be as obvious as possible? I'm down with that."

Dig held up a hand, "This Gordon, he was a hunter right?"

"Yup," I answered.

"So what makes you think he's going to just come after you guys and not work his way through the ranks first. He could be setting up hunts just to get your attention."

"One, he hates me with a passion," Sam said, "Two, if he wanted to be stealthy he wouldn't have sent that vid and three, we're assuming everything from here on out is a trap. That's why we called you guys. Our intel isn't matching up, on one hand. we've been told Dean and I are wanted alive, yet Gordon seems pretty bent on killing all hunters. He may be going off plan here or he's trying to pull us into something. Dean's plan is to piss him off, pick a spot to tell him to meet us at and see if he goes for it. If he doesn't, we know something else is up. If he does, we deal with it."

It's always nice to have someone in your life that knows exactly what you're thinking, "Pretty much. This is one of those feint attack things. We call his bluff and see what he's made of. Better than chasing shadows."

Oliver gave us both a level look, "Doesn't appear you need help with strategy."

"We might if he doesn't take us up on it." I said, "But mostly we needed unknowns who aren't going to be emotional about this. As soon as the hunters find out what's up, all hell is liable to break loose and I'd rather team with people who aren't out for blood."

"Smart move," Dig said, "Because you're out for blood too, both of you are."

"We know," Sam agreed, "You're here to keep us on track. Dean and I don't need to make anymore stupid mistakes."

I shot a look at Cas who's face stayed empty as he locked eyes with me for a second before he looked away. At least he knew that all three of us were in the same boat. We all had more damn baggage than was healthy or safe for people like us to have. Unfortunately, the type of people, or angels, we were, were the exact type that collected baggage at ridiculous rates.

I guess it's a good thing that we had a vigilante and his crew to keep us on the level; which only goes to show how truly fucked up we were.


	11. From All Sides

Sam's laptop beeped, "What's that?" I asked.

"Felicity wants to Skype," he explained then pushed something and Felicity's face filled the screen. Her hair was down, which took me a second to get used to, and she looked exhausted.

"Hey girl," I said, "When did you sleep last?"

She seemed honestly confused by that, "What day is it?"

"Yeah. Okay, when you tell us whatever crappy news you have, go home, get some sleep." I was kind of surprised Oliver had let her go that long without sleep.

Her eyes were scrolling through text, moving rapidly in time with the sounds of her fingers hitting the keys. "Can't, have too much to filter through."

Sam looked at Oliver, who shrugged, "I've already tried to reason with her."

Sam wasn't the least bit pleased with that answer, "Felicity, share your screen. Let me look at what's going on."

"All right just don't..."

As soon as a mass of emails, scrolling numbers and who knows what else appeared on the laptop screen Sam shut them all down in record time.

"Sam! What the!" She was looking straight at the camera now, and boy was she pissed.

"Tell us what you have to, then go to bed! We'll call you in five hours to wake you up. Now, why'd you Skype?"

Her lips thinned out and she glared straight at Sam who didn't flinch. He'd had years of me glaring at him and Felicity's glare was nowhere near the level mine can get to.

"Well?" Sam pushed it. I never realized just how blue her eyes were until I saw them magnified on the screen. She was trying hard to look as cold and hard as Oliver can, but I saw her cave after another minute of the stare down, which made me wonder why she listened more to Sam than Oliver.

"Fine. That video, came from Shayna's phone which is still in Oklahoma. I'll send you the address. It's moved around so I don't think Gordon abandoned it. It's a rural town so no traffic cameras for me to tap into. It could be him or he could have given it to someone else and moved on. You hunters have a pretty good lock on how to hide from people like me. Hate to say it."

Had to admit that sent a bit of pride through me. Felicity's top notch, if she couldn't track people like us, no one could. Then I remembered I was having to track a hunter, talk about short lived victories.

"All right," Sam said, "Anything else?"

"Not really." She pushed her glasses up and frowned, "That video was time stamped about five minutes before he sent it, so it's as close to real time as you can get. He hasn't sent any other emails that I can see. I hacked into her phone and looked through it, I also set an alert on it so anything he uses it for I'll know. Sam, you need to tell the rest of the hunters not to read anything that comes from her account. I can change the password on it and take it off of auto remember so he can't access any of it if you want."

Sam had gone into hacker stealth mode, I could tell before he even said a word. "Can you route all outgoing emails to you and reply to what he sends? And scramble the names in her contact list so he doesn't know who's who.

Her eyes widened for a second, then she was off and running, "Scrambling the names is easy. The rest is tricky, I have to mimic their styles. I could set up a mirror site though and reroute that email to me."

I have no idea how or way, but she suddenly seemed a lot less tired. She really likes a challenge. Sam saw it too and realized he'd outsmarted himself. He wanted her to rest but he'd just given her a new challenge. "How long?"

She didn't even take a second to think about it, "Hour or two, tops."

"Okay, set it up, then go to sleep. Promise me. Don't make me send shit tons of malware to your secure server. This new laptop has a lot more processing power than the old one, I'll hack you faster now."

I thought she'd been angry before, "Don't you dare! It took me two days to clean that up last time."

He leaned in closer to the screen, "Then sleep. Promise?"

She muttered something under her breath, "Promise. Talk to you soon."

Her face disappeared, Dig and Roy were staring at Sam, completely stunned. "You hacked into her server?" Roy asked.

Sam just shrugged, "She has me test out her network security. I've been learning all kinds of new tricks from her. She said she'd been feeling like she was plateauing, I guess no one scary has tried to hack into her system in a few years. I have time to kill and like computer stuff so it worked out. Anyway, Oklahoma. We sending someone to see if Gordon's still there or not?"

Oliver hadn't seemed concerned about Felicity paying more attention to Sam than him but I added a conversation with Sam to my list of things to do. "Someone can go with Cas to check it out," I suggested. "Coyote can stay here and help us ID monsters. Take a day at most, drive there, snoop around, drive back. Unless he's on the other side of Oklahoma. Cas doesn't sleep so that helps."

Dig spoke up, "I'll go. Then we can meet up where ever you guys plan to take this asshole on."

"Cas? You good with that?"

"Of course. If we find Gordon there do you wish us to detain him there or bring him here?"

"May I suggest something?" Oliver asked.

"Sure."

"Follow him. Tag him with nanites if you can, then Felicity will know every move he makes. We can't waste time interrogating people right now. It seems like whatever this is is picking up speed, if we can find out whose in charge, we can go directly to the source."

Sam's eyebrow went up, "Nanites?"

"Nanotech that acts as a tracking beacon. If it gets in the blood stream it stays active for months. Well, on humans anyway, no guarantee on vampires. I assume they still have blood."

"They do. I'm down with that idea." I said. "At least for now. It's a lot safer to have computers track him than people, he'll pick up on someone following him pretty quick. He was a good hunter and Purgatory makes you hyper aware."

"We should get going then," Cas said as he stood up. "We can take my car."

"Still driving the pimp mobile?"

Cas managed to look offended, "It is not a pimp mobile. I like it."

"It stands out like a sore thumb. Oliver, can they borrow your rental?"

"Sure."

"Good and Cas?" He just stood there, staring at me. "Go buy some new clothes. Ditch the trench coat, blend in with everyone else. It's midsummer, no human would be wearing that right now. Either buy some or borrow some of mine." They'd be a bit loose on him but would fit well enough.

The stare switched to a mildly exasperated glare, "Shall I change my hair color too?"

Coyote snickered and Sam covered his eyes with his hand and shook his head. I get no respect. "No need to be a smart ass," I pointed out.

"I don't recall that ever stopping you," he pointed out, "Having, or not having a valid need."

Sam didn't offer an iota of help on that one, just turned his palms up and shrugged, "Got to say, that's pretty accurate."

"Thanks, really. No Cas, you don't need to dye your hair. Stay in touch."

"Of course."

Oliver slid the keys for the rental down the table to Dig who grabbed them, stood up and stretched. "Someone text me the address. Any idea how long of a drive we're looking at?"

Sam looked at his phone, "About five hours. I'll send you the address and the nearest mall to get Cas some clothes. Thanks Dig, I know you just got here."

"No worries, I don't mind a road trip now and again. Ready Cas?"

Cas nodded and the two of them headed up the stairs and left. Oliver focused on me, "We should probably scout out where we're meeting all the hunters. I'm assuming you want Roy and I out of view."

"Yup, there's some decent woods close to it. It's an old barn, plenty of cover."

Roy shifted in his seat and frowned, "Do you really think there are hunters who are monsters and working against us? I mean other than Gordon."

"Sam and I know of at least one hunter who was turned but kept his nose clean, he got bitten by a werewolf." I hadn't thought about Garth in years, wonder if he's still alive. "We let him go because of the situation he was in, they were eating animal hearts and pretty set on staying clear from human hearts. It can happen to anyone. The tricky part of all this is if we do find a hunter that's been turned but is staying on the straight and narrow who's willing to help, will be making sure other hunters don't take them out just on principle. Sam and I are a bit more flexible on things these days after everything we've been through, other hunters, not so much. So if we do find a monster in this group and they try to bolt, you guys need to slow them down and let Sam and I take care of the rest."

"From what I've heard that's not all that easy," Oliver said. "If we don't know what kind of monster it is how do we know what to use to slow it down?"

"Bring any of your specialty arrows?" Sam asked.

"We flew commercial so no," Oliver said, "I didn't bring any." Then his lips moved in a rather self congratulatory smirk, "I did ship two full quivers to the closest UPS store after you called. I over-nighted them. They arrived a few hours ago."

"Props to the vigilante," I complimented him.

"Thank you. Will the net arrows hold a monster?"

"Long enough for Sam and I to get in range? Definitely."

"All right then. Let's head out," Oliver kind of ordered, then shot a side long look at me as he get ready to stand up. "I mean, if there's nothing else we need to do here."

"Not really. We just need to grab gear. We can all squeeze into Baby or Sam can take his car too. Preferences?"

Sam thought about it, "How about I take Oliver to pick up his stuff, you, Roy and Coyote head out to the farm. Some of the hunters will probably be getting there in an hour or so. Roy can find he and Oliver good spots to hide and I'll drop Oliver off about a mile away, he can go the back way to the farm and meet up with Roy. Once I get back we can start testing people and tell them what's going on."

"Sounds good to me," I said. Oliver and Roy nodded, "Let's roll then."

Sam, Roy and I hit up the armory and grabbed all our toys. Then Roy, Coyote and me hopped into Baby and took off. Roy was dressed for the job. He and Oliver were both in dark colors, boots and long sleeves. I'd guess Roy had spread the idea to Oliver that layers are best for hunting monsters. Roy had on a dark green, military type cargo jacket, a black flannel under that and a black t-shirt for his final layer. He was in black cargo pants and boots. Oliver had basically the same outfit on except his clothes leaned towards more grey and he had an actual hoodie for his second layer. I'd managed to refrain from making a joke about that, barely. We had time to kill but none of us really felt like sitting around the Bunker. The vid of Shayna's beheading was in the back of all of our minds, even if we weren't talking about it. I'd set it on low burn in my head, to be used when I had Gordon up close and personal. In the mean time we had other things to worry about.

It took about twenty minutes to get to the farm, I pulled up and we got out. The barn itself was leaning pretty heavily to the right, the door was off the hinges, and more than a few planks were missing from the walls. I think it had been white at one point in it's history, now it was dirt covered grey. It had six horse stables inside, a torn up floor and a loft that would have been deemed unsafe to walk an five years ago, now it probably wouldn't hold a kid's weight much less a full grown adult.

"Charming," Coyote said, "Why is it hunting always seems to involve buildings that should be condemned?"

"Because only old, creepy buildings are haunted, you know that. Besides, it adds mood and realism."

She started walking towards the door, "That's what we're calling it?"

"Sounds better than we all have illegal weapons, have committed a butt load of felonies and don't want cops to see us."

"Can't argue with that." She was in her usual hunting garb, with an added jacket layer. Coyote loves her knives, she had one strapped to her thigh, one in a sheathe on her waistband and at least one more in her jacket. I think she had one strapped to her wrist as well. At least two of them had silver coating, she likes to be prepared for all possibilities.

Roy peeled off and started investigating points for cover to the left of the barn, I followed Coyote inside.

"So what are you planning to tell them?" She asked as we started moving abandoned tools and pieces of barn to the edges to give us a clear space.

"If we show them that vid, which we'll have to, they're going to have a ton of questions about Purgatory and why Gordon's a vamp. Sam and I may have to come clean on a lot of our history if we want these guys to trust us. As far as everyone knows, Gordon just fell off the grid. To have him come back like that, well, hunters won't let that slide."

She stopped shoving some broken planks across the ground and looked at me, "Babe, that could backfire on you fast."

We'd just come from a fight establishing who I was back home, and here we were heading for another one. "Yeah, I know. Guess we get to find out who our real friends are."

"You sure Sam's going to go for this?"

"I'm hoping to deflect away from him and keep them focused on me, Leviathans and Purgatory. That's the part that's important, not the rest. I'll run it by him when he gets back, but I'm pretty sure he's already thinking about it."

"Knowing him, he's been thinking about it since the first hint of Gordon popped up."

"Yeah."

We finished cleaning up the floor just as I heard Sam's car pull up. Sam walked in, Oliver and Roy must have already settled in to wait. "They're set up on either side," Sam confirmed. "Gerald is about thirty minutes out. The rest aren't far behind. We leading with the vid?"

"I think we need to test everyone first, they already know something's up. Then go to the vid and probably end up explaining how I got to Purgatory. Hopefully we can avoid talking about the whole Lucifer thing."

Sam looked away from me, jaw tense and eyes filled with way too much concern. Everything he'd worked for this last year could very easily fall apart because of this. What he'd built was held together by trust, trust in each other and trust in him. When they found out his, our past, they could shift us from the hunter column to the monster column in a heartbeat. Sure, we weren't monsters now, but we'd both been monsters over the past few years. I wouldn't be all that surprised if at least one of them tried to take us out if we went too far into it.

"If we can get Gerald on our side, that's a start." I added. "He's more level headed than some of the others."

"Yeah, let's hope."

We milled around for another half an hour when Gerald pulled up, he had Sherm with him. Guess after being spotted he'd figured it was safer to travel with a friend. They, like the rest of us, were dressed for business. Sherm was in all green except for his jeans and Gerald was wearing a blue plaid checkered button up shirt over two other shirts.

"Dean, Sam, Coyote, nice to see you all." Gerald said.

"What's this all about?" Sherm asked.

May as well take this head on. "Get out your silver," Coyote, Sam and I bared our forearms, "No need to slice, since we're doing this with everyone but touch us with it. Then we'll do the same for you. Show your gums too."

Both of them went from friendly to suspicious fast. "We just saw you guys the other day."

"Yeah, well since then Tom and Sarah got hit, Tom was turned, Sarah had to kill him and Shayna got beheaded by someone who used to be a hunter." Sam's voice left no room for doubt about how serious he was. "So, humor us."

Coyote hadn't reacted so I knew they were most likely human, but they didn't know that.

Sherm spat and shook his head, "Jesus H Christ! What the hell is going on?"

Gerald eyes went wide for a second, then he recovered and raised his eyebrows at Sam and I.

"We'll explain in a second, after we all know we're who we say we are." I replied.

"All right, all right. Hold on to your horses, jeeze. I didn't realize we were in full Inquisition mode here," Sherm muttered as he pulled out a coin. "Pure silver, promise." He set it on his skin, then all of ours in turn. Then he pulled up his lip and squeezed his upper gum line. "Happy?"

"Not quite," Coyote answered. She pulled off her armband, which I know for a fact is pure silver, and repeated Sherm's moves, we all bared our gums and relaxed. "Good. Nice to know we're all still humans."

"Yeah, so Shayna?" Gerald asked.

"You're going to.." Sam started.

"Sam, I got this." I interrupted. "We're going to show you a vid. Either of you remember a hunter named Gordon? Black guy, slightly unhinged, disappeared about six or seven years back?"

Sherm shook his head, Gerald's eyes narrowed in thought, "Vamp specific guy? Sister or someone got turned and he was all in to wipe every vamp off the face of the earth."

"Yup. That's him. Sam and I had a run in with him. He got it in his head to target us for some rather convoluted reasons, Sam suckered him into getting arrested, he got out, came after us again. Except that time he was a vamp, he'd gotten turned. Sam killed him."

"All right..." Gerald said, obviously knowing there was a lot more to that story. "And?"

I took a deep breath, "Here's where ya'll are going to have to expand your world view. When monsters die, they go to Purgatory. God made it to hold all the things that weren't human. Now, remember Dick Roman?"

Sherm did, "Billionaire guy, made a huge splash than vanished."

"I killed him, with some help. Let's just say something got out of Purgatory and was taking people over, Roman was the head of the clan. I was standing too close to him and got sucked into Purgatory. I found a way out, had to trust a vamp to do it. He's back in Purgatory now," It still hurt to think about Benny. He'd tried, he really had. "Anyway, apparently other things from Purgatory found out how I got out and that brings us back to Gordon."

Sam pulled out his laptop, set up the wifi and looked at Sherm and Gerald, "This is not easy to watch, even for people like us." He warned, then hit play.

Sherm was muttering cuss word after cuss word under his breath before thirty seconds had passed and if I was any judge I'd say that Gerald was just barely keeping himself from pulling a gun and blowing the laptop away. It ended and silence echoed throughout the barn. Sherm couldn't even manage a cuss word he was so pissed off. Two or three minutes passed while they digested all of it.

"Do we know who or what else got out?" Gerald asked.

"No, we're focusing on him first." I answered.

"You teamed with a vamp to get out?" Sherm said.

"That's pretty much all that's down there, vamps, werewolves and Leviathans. Didn't have much choice. You have my word that while he was back up here, he stuck with bagged blood. I swear."

Gerald took a deep breath, let it out and shoved all his rage down deep, "Is it relevant how you "broke the world"?

"Depends. Do you want to spend the next six hours hearing our life story or not?" I replied.

"It's not relevant," Sam interjected, "Because the world's still running and Gordon has an unholy grudge against Dean and I. If we hadn't done what we had things would have been much worse, as in most of humanity getting killed. So no. It's really not."

I hadn't expected him to take that approach but he was right, the world was still running.

Sherm nodded, "So why are we here?"

"We may need people to draw these bastards out," I said, "Sam and I will try to go after Gordon directly but he's not the only one."

Gerald got right to the point, "You need bait hunters."

"Yes."

They looked at each other, Sherm spoke first. "I've never been one to like bein' a sitting duck, rather take shit head on. I'm in."

Gerald took a minute longer, I started to get nervous because he studied Sam and I as if he was seeing a whole new side of who we were and wasn't sure he liked it. "I'm in on one condition. When it's over and if we're all still alive, I want the full story. I'll keep it to myself if you two want but as much hate as he has for you, that isn't over something trivial. Neither of you have led us wrong, since Sam has started organizing hunters things have gotten a lot better but it sounds like there's some serious skeletons in your closets. The type of skeletons that can wipe out large groups of people. If I'm going to keep working with you, I want to know what I'm attaching myself to. Deal?"

We didn't have a lot of choice on this, we needed Gerald. Sam gave me a small nod, "Deal," I said.

"Good. I'll back you with the others when it gets hairy, which it will before this little shindig is over."

"Thanks."

Two down, eight to go.


	12. What Lies Beneath

Over the next hour or so all of them but Sarah trickled in; Teresa, Susan, Mark, Ruth, Star and Sean all passed the test with flying colors. We held off launching into explanations stating that we didn't want to have to go through the same story eight more times. They mumbled, grumbled and griped about it until Gerald spoke up and told them that what we had to show them no one would want to see more than once. That shut them up. Rick rolled in, I didn't know him all that well. He'd been hunting for a few years according to Sam but I'd never met him. Sam vouched for him though, said he was solid even if he spent a little too many hours at in casinos around the country. Sam had heard rumors that Rick had a wife and a couple of kids. He seemed to win a lot, which was good for him. Who the hell were we to judge how a hunter got his money. If running the casino circuit helped him feed his family, then that's all that matters to me. Maybe his kids weren't growing up in motel rooms and stealing food if Dad came back late from a hunt.

He was driving a beat up old Toyota Celica, not exactly a car I would choose but it's nondescript enough. He parked, got out and started walking towards us. He was gangly, his arms seemed almost too long for his height, which I was guessing was around 5'6", his hair was black and cut in a military high and tight cut and he was one of those people who you don't remember seeing five seconds after they walk by you. Nothing about him was interesting, nothing stood out. Perfect for a hunter. He had on beat up jeans, sneakers of all things and an Iron Maiden shirt. I had to give him props on music choices. Iron Maiden may not be the best rock band, but they did have some kick ass songs.

As he drew closer, his eyes took all of us in. We'd propped the door open so we were in plain sight but inside the building itself. "Howdy all. Quite a gatherin' we got here. Gerald, Sherm, Susan. Nice to see ya." They nodded a brief greeting. "Sam," he said as he reached out to shake Sam's hand. They shook hands and he turned towards me, "You must be Dean."

Coyote was standing across from me, I looked at her, not expecting anything, but she stiffened, shook her head and reached for a blade. Shit.

I took hold of his hand, gripped it hard and put my silver tipped blade against his skin. His eyes went wide with pain as his flesh bubbled, he jerked out of my grip and bolted. Seven guns were drawn just as he got hit with something and a net deployed, seemingly out of thin air, tangling him up and making him fall face first into the dirt.

"Wait!" Sam ordered, just as the air erupted with bullets. Fortunately he'd fallen so fast that most of the bullets missed.

"What the fuck!" Gerald shouted, the rest of them started moving to surround Rick and finish the job.

I had to head this off fast, so I ran, pulled my gun and pointed it at him. Sam got between the other hunters and I and held his hands up. "Wait! We need information first."

"He's not human," Mark spat, "What the hell else do we need to know?"

Sam faced them down, they stopped moving and waited for him to talk, "We brought you all here because the monsters are organizing against hunters. Gerald, Sherm, Dean and I saw evidence of vamps and werewolves working together. Something is up. We got the video Coyote is going to show you this morning, watch it, then we'll talk. Rick's not going anywhere."

Rick had what I assumed were silver bullets in his leg and shoulder, he was already starting to sweat as his system reacted. "Please, please...don't kill me," he begged, "I haven't eaten people. Please. I have to take care of my kids."

"Talk fast, I can't keep them at bay forever," I said. "What are you?"

He nodded, "Werewolf. I was bit two years ago."

"Two goddamn years!" Ruth hissed. "No one knew? How?" Ruth is blonde and blunt. She's pretty black and white about things.

"Really?" Gerald asked. I wasn't looking at him but there was a healthy amount of surprise in his voice. "We hang out all the damn time."

"Eat animal hearts," Rick panted, "Full moon, make sure I'm home. Built a safe room, Maddie, my wife, chains me up with silver, so can't escape." His skin was losing color, the silver wouldn't kill him since it wasn't a hit to the heart but it would hurt like hell and make him sick. "Rest of the month I'm fine. Werewolf senses help me win in the casinos. Can tell when people are bluffing."

"Wait," Susan said, "You can what, smell when people are nervous?"

"Yeah. Could tell something was up here, but with everything going on.." he trailed off, closed his eyes and grimaced. "Son of a bitch. Look, I don't talk to other werewolves or monsters. I still hunt, you all know that."

Star stepped closer, "How can you? You're one of them."

He whimpered, "No, not a monster, don't eat people. Hunt ghosts, witches, vamps. They hurt people. Not me."

All this was hitting way too close to home for me and probably Sam too.

"Do you know anything about what the monsters are up to?" Sam asked.

He shook his head fast, "No" His eyes opened up again. I realized they were brown and there wasn't a hint of a lie in them. Just desperation and fear. "Please, my son's a special needs kid, we have to pay for special teachers and things. Maddie can't pay for it with a regular job if I die. Casino's the only way I can help him."

I looked over at Gerald. "That true?"

Gerald sighed and looked away, "Yeah, met his whole family. Ate dinner with them. His daughter graduates in a few years, wants to go to college. His son's autistic, way on the end of the spectrum. They pay for a lot of help."

I heard shifting feet behind me, I turned my head and saw a whole lot of uncomfortable hunters. Sam had picked hunters that were at least willing to think before blowing people away, which was damn smart of him. Teresa and Susan holstered their guns and took a few steps back, so did Gerald. Sherm was still considering his options. I could tell Star really, really wanted to take him out but her gun was wavering.

Ruth and Sean were staring at me. I didn't know Sean all that well, we'd only met once. He was as Irish as you can get, even had the accent. "Are we to be protecting monsters now Dean?" His voice was soft but there wasn't any give in it.

"Tell you what Sean, I'll keep an eye on Rick, you guys all watch that video. You decide which monster is more worth our time."

He gave me a cold, calculating look. I wasn't sure why Sam picked him for this. "Aye, I'll watch it but, even if we let Rick go now, he won't be safe any longer. I made no promise to keep secrets like this from other hunters."

If he wanted cold, I'd give him cold. "Sean, every damn hunter on the planet has secrets. Way I see it, he's been doing good, not killing people. You going to take a fellow hunter out? Human or not, how many lives has he saved over the last two years? Think about it. Coyote? Show them the vid."

She nodded and they changed position to get closer to the laptop. I looked left, which was the direction I thought the arrow had come from and saw a bush move ever so slightly and a flash of blonde hair. Oliver. Thankfully the hunters had been too preoccupied by a werewolf in their midst to ask how a net had magically appeared out of thin air and trapped Rick, but I knew that was going to come up. Joy, more secrets.

I looked back down at Rick, "Sorry we blew your cover, really am. If Gerald didn't even know you'd been turned you must have been staying clear of killing people."

He'd curled up into the fetal position, his muscles were tight as hell. Silver really kicks a werewolf's ass. "Bound to happen sooner or later," He whispered. "Pushing my luck already. Have money put away, hope it's enough. They'll come for me now. Someone will. Maddie, Jane, Steven..."

Those must be his kids. I snuck a quick look over my shoulder, everyone was caught up in watching the vid but I leaned closer to him just in case. "If it comes to that, I know someone who will help Maddie with the kids and don't worry about the money. It'll be taken care of. I'll give you a number to give to Maddie."

He slowly turned his head to look up at me, there was way too much gratitude in his eyes. Made me kind of uncomfortable. I was just trying to help someone out. "You'd do that?"

"Yeah, I get it, so does Sam. Trust me. Shit happens, you did the best you could to keep doing the right thing. I can't keep them from talking or coming for you but I can do this. Just keep your trap shut about it."

That got a quick nod, "Thank you..."

We heard Shayna's screams. That took his attention off his pain for a second, "What was that?"

"The reason we're here. A monster that actually needs killing."

"Who was it?"

"Shayna, getting beheaded, slowly."

I saw the wolf start to take hold. He snarled, "Irish Shayna?"

"Yes."

His fingers started to shift into claws, "I knew her. She watched the kids. Take these bullets out, I'll help."

"Settle down! They see claws they'll want to take you out now."

"Right, sorry." The claws faded away.

"Sam," Sean's voice drifted up from behind me. You know all the stories about Irish people loving to fight, how they go beserk in battle. The layers of impending violence I heard made me start believing it. "Where is this bloody sick, sociopathic bastard ?" Then it dawned on me Irish Sean might know Irish Shayna.

"We think Oklahoma," Sam answered, "Have some people checking it out."

Next thing I knew Sean was standing next to me, staring down at Rick. "Did your fucking demon gifted, twisted werewolf senses hear her? Did they?"

Sean was definitely not a grey area type guy.

"Yes. Already told Dean, take the bullets out, I'll help. Shayna was my friend too."

Sean struggled with it. I knew that internal battle all too well so I knew to keep my mouth shut.

"Sean," Gerald said, "We could use him. He can sniff them out, maybe get close enough to find out who's running this. That fucker in the vid, he said there were others. We'll need all the help we can get. I've been at his house the day after the full moon, no reports anywhere of people with their hearts ripped out. He's on the level."

I could hear Sean's teeth grinding together, "Working with monsters, it's like working with the fuckin' IRA." Another minute passed, "I won't kill you today Rick, or tomorrow. I won't be takin' an oath on not killin' ya next week or next month. You're a monster, you just happen to be one that has a use right now." He slammed his foot into Rick's back, Rick barely moved. He probably was in enough pain that the kick didn't register. "Sam, I'll help enough to get this fucker. After that, I'm done with you, with this whole group. I heard enough to know he's got it out for you and us because of something personal between you three. I hunt, I don't clean up others' messes and I'm not about to be sacrificing myself to protect something unnatural. Any monsters that come for me won't last long enough to report back to anyone else. Call me when you know where he is. Anything else, I don't bloody well care."

He stormed off, got back into his car and kicked up enough gravel to hit Sherm and Gerald's car on the way out. Bastard! I'd have to paint those now.

I put my gun away and turned around. Rick wasn't a threat and Sam was going to need help with the rest of them. "Where do you all stand? Sarah should be here soon. To make sure everyone is all on the same page, vamps caught up to her and Tom, tied them up, turned him, made her watch then left her to kill him. Said the same thing as Gordon, the guy in the vid did, things are just starting. We need people to help us track whoever's in charge down and take them out. I'm figuring we don't have to show Sarah the vid, she's been through enough." I hoped she wasn't a vamp now too, but would cross that bridge when I had to.

"I got tagged too," Gerald added, "Got away on pure luck. Think they followed me from the last gig. Did you get any information from the vamps you took?"

"Yeah," Sam answered, "At least four groups of monsters being trained on how to hunt hunters, how to hide, lay false trails all that. We have some leads but nothing concrete yet. We also have a way to kill vamps at a distance now too. It works. I tested it out. It's a purifying brew basically, turns out once you get past the skin, vamps are sensitive to holy water and garlic. We dumped some nails into it, loaded the nails into shotgun shells and now we have vamp bullets."

Sherm smiled at that, "Nice. Always love new toys. What about that net thing?"

"Yeah, we brought in some outsiders that no monster or hunter knows." I explained. "They have better toys and we need some way to surprise the monsters. These guys don't act like hunters but they're good and they have better ideas on strategies on how to deal with groups of things coming after us." They weren't too happy with that, "Look, the monsters seem to be changing the rules here. If we want to win this, we have to think outside the box."

Gerald was staying neutral - ish, we were starting to make Sherm nervous, Ruth and Star weren't all that keen and Teresa and Susan seemed interested. Sean was out, Rick was in. The sound of a crunching gravel broke up the silence, had to be Sarah. She parked and as soon as I saw her I knew her story wasn't a story. She was completely devastated, her movements stiff like she was trying to hold on and not break down, rage, pain and hate fought for dominance on her face. Her long brown hair was barely pulled back in a pony tail. She usually wore makeup and was dressed well for a hunter, not now. Red plaid shirt untucked, old sweats, not jeans and not a hint of color on her face. It was more than obvious that she was in mourning and wanted to make something bleed.

Coyote met her halfway, "Sarah, Dean and I are so sorry. We loved him too." Coyote knew better than to offer any sort of embrace, not right now, but Sarah gripped her hand tight for a second then let go.

"Thanks." Then Sarah looked over Coyote's shoulder at us, her sorrow and pain hit all of us like a freight train. She was holding herself together just enough to say what she'd come to say. "Whatever Dean and Sam say, do it. The vamps that turned Tom, they talked about how they were going to wipe us all out, how they weren't going to run and hide anymore, that they were going to take their rightful place on top of the food chain. They aren't scared of us anymore, they want to take us all out. One of them mentioned how with the Alpha in charge nothing would stop them."

Yeah, that was the last think I wanted to hear. "Alpha vamp?"

"Not sure, they just said Alpha."

"What's an Alpha?" Gerald asked.

"The first vampire, or first of any monster." Sam replied, completely lost in thought, "They all have an Alpha, they all came from an original, before all of them was Eve. She's their mother. We killed her."

"Yeah, we killed a lot of things that seem to keep coming back around. Fuck."

Star spoke up, "You guys seem to know a hell of a lot about monsters. Why? Why does that vamp hate you so much?"

Sarah had walked closer and she looked at the laptop screen, which was paused on Gordon's face, "Is that Gordon?"

Oh hell. "Yeah."

She froze, her eyes went wide, then she looked at Sam, then me and I could see her putting some things together. "Play it."

"Sarah, it's bloody." Sam warned.

Sarah may as well have been hurling daggers at Sam with the way she looked at him, "Play. It. Now."

Sam did as she asked. She took control of the laptop and paused it before he started sawing at Shayna's neck. "Is it true?" She asked. "What he said about you years ago?"

Sam's hands dropped to his side, I moved closer to him as he squared his shoulders, "If you're referring to the Apocalypse and Lucifer yes. I was destined to be Lucifer's vessel. Dean was Michael's. We disagreed with the concept of being used to bring about the end of the world so came up with a different plan. I accepted Lucifer, took control and dove headfirst, with him inside me, back into his Cage where he spent years torturing my soul. So yes, Dean and I started it, but we ended it too and billions of people didn't die. If you have an issue with that, I really don't give a shit. I was in my twenties with the weight of the entire planet on my damn shoulders, I made mistakes, so did Dean. We pulled through and the planet's still in one piece so keep your opinions to yourselves."

I wasn't sure who was more taken off guard, them because of his confirmation of all the various rumors over the years, or me because he'd hadn't tried to soften it, justify it or talk around it. He just laid it out there, which had never been his style. Mine? Sure. Not his. I couldn't find a single thing wrong with what he'd said. Maybe he'd finally gotten over the guilt, maybe we both had.


	13. The Truth Will Set You Free

It was funny though; I'd thought that throwing it all out there, or most of it anyway, to people I'm not all that close with would make me a lot more uncomfortable than I was. Fact was, I didn't really care either. That whole chapter of our lives was so far behind us now that anything these guys would say wouldn't make a damn difference anyway. If they wanted to bail or take us on for shit that happened ten years ago, that was up to them. Sam was right, we were both still kids in a lot of ways back then, not that age has anything to do with how you deal with being told you're vessels for two of the most powerful beings in existence.

Eight sets of eyes went way wide as they stared at Sam and tried to process what he'd just said. Gerald leaned heavily against the wall. Ruth, Star, Susan and Teresa's mouths were all hanging wide open. Sherm just started cussing under his breath again and Sarah didn't move a muscle. Mark's jaw was tight as hell.

"To sum up the rest of the story," Sam continued, "He came after us twice, second time he'd been turned into a vampire. I killed him. Years later another situation happened in which he stopped another incursion by a group of monsters that were bent on taking over the world called Leviathans. Dean got sucked into Purgatory, which is a real place, got out thanks to a vampire helping him and we thought it was all settled. At least until a few days ago. Now he's here and he has to be dealt with. We already agreed to tell Gerald, in full detail, our entire life history down to the last horrific detail, which there are a lot of. You all are free to listen in. In the meantime, are you helping us or not? Whether or not you help, you and every other hunter out there are being targeted. Make up your minds. The clock is ticking." He looked at me, "Rick in?"

"Yeah, we need to get those bullets out so he can heal up. Coyote and I will start on that."

"Good."

Coyote and I started to walk towards Rick when Ruth asked, "You're going to help him?"

"Yup," I answered, "My definition of monster has changed over the years. Used to be anything not human, then Sam and I got possessed, cursed and dealt with angels that tried to kill us and demons and vampires that saved our asses. It's not black and white. If they ain't hurting people, they ain't monsters. He's got kids. You want to go tell him you killed their Dad? Go for it."

Rick was close to unconscious, "Well at least he won't move much." I told Coyote as we started untangling him from the net.

"I put the first aid kit in Baby's trunk." Coyote said, "Added a few things to it too. Should be able to get those bullets out quick."

"All right," I got the kit, brought it back and started working on removing the bullets.

Sam gave them all a few minutes to think. I got the last bullet out and the wounds started to close on their own, Rick's breathing even out and some of the pain left his face. "Damn, perks of being a werewolf." I said as I used some bottled water to wash my hands off.

"Well?" Sam asked. "In or out?"

I'd chosen to ignore the group while working on Rick, none of them tried to kill us so that was a good sign. Now that I was done playing doctor I looked at them. Gerald and Sherm still seemed okay with helping, Susan and Teresa's faces were near impossible to read, Sarah's head was lowered so I couldn't see her face, Ruth and Star had walked to the back of the barn and were having a heated conversation from the looks of it.

"In." Teresa said.

Susan nodded, "Me too."

Sarah raised her head, conflicted was too simple of a term to describe how she looked. "Part of me wants to blame you for what happened to Tom, but..." She sighed, "How could you know that Gordon would come back? Tom used to say that hunting is all about hoping the next thing you hunt is something you know how to handle, not something you've never seen before. None of us would know how to handle what you say you've been through, or what's going on with the monsters now. You've always tried to protect people, you're still doing that. I'm in."

Sam and I both breathed a huge sigh of relief at that one. If she wasn't in it would probably make the others less likely to want to join us. Ruth threw her hands up and stormed towards us, "I'm with Sean. I won't take out Rick, not now anyway, but I'll never work with monsters. I don't care what kind of fucked up choices you had to deal with, you have to draw a line somewhere!"

Have to say I wasn't really going to miss her. At least she didn't kick up gravel when she drove off.

Mark had been alternating between grinding his teeth and clenching his fists. "I always blew off those rumors. Thought you two were too smart to be that dumb. Guess I was wrong. I'm out." He walked off.

Star joined us, "I'm in, for now. If we find out there's no monster conspiracy to kill us, then I'm out. You made your beds, you lie in them. Don't expect us to save your hides from some vampire that supposedly returned from the dead."

"Fair enough," Sam replied.

I guess bringing up the three or four times Sam and I had saved her ass in the past would be bad form. Star's good, but she used to be impulsive, would never take the time to really talk to people about what they'd seen so tended to go in with a set notion in her head about what was going on. Course, years ago I never really minded helping her out. She's got that dancer body, long blonde hair and these really cool blue-gold eyes. We had some good times. Seven out of ten was a lot better than I'd thought we get. I half expected to be dodging bullets before this whole meeting was over.

"All right, Dean and I are going to focus on finding Gordon. We don't want any of you to get involved with that fight if at all possible. We think they are setting hunts to try trap hunters and take them out. What we need is to turn the tables on them."

"Bait hunters," Sarah said.

"In essence yes. We need you to work in larger groups, try to trap them before they trap you and get information. Problem is we aren't sure which hunts are which or how many monsters really know what's going on. I have someone trying to locate some of the monsters we saw a few days ago that seem to be actively involved. If there is a hunt near where they are, those are probably the ones to go on."

"All that's fine and dandy," Sherm said, "But how are we going to keep other hunters off the grid. You know they won't sit things out for more than a day or two."

"Yeah," I said, "We were hoping if you guys backed us up on the need to sit tight, they might wait a few days. Sam and I are hoping to get Gordon and fast, make him talk and end this within a week or two."

That shocked them. Susan snorted, "You want to take out this whole thing in a week?"

"Won't be the first nearly impossible thing we took on," I countered. "Besides, I like to have goals. Keeps me motivated."

She tried to fight it but ended up chuckling, so did Teresa, "Well your ego sure as hell hasn't gotten any smaller over the years."

I smiled, "It's one of my best features."

"It's certainly a feature, not sure if best is an accurate term," Coyote chimed in. I wasn't quite sure if she was insulting or complimenting me. I decided to take it as a positive statement, at least in my head.

That seemed to lighten things up a little bit, the air in the barn didn't need a chainsaw to cut the tension anymore, just a machete.

"We'll help settle down the masses," Gerald said, "In the meantime, what are we doing?"

"For now, stay off the email regarding any of the plans." Sam directed, "Actual calls only, it will slow things down but phones and laptops get stolen. We will send out regular emails, maybe even some misdirection, just in case Gordon is using Shayna's phone. I'm sure you noticed he sent that vid from her email account. As soon as we get a lock on where some of these people are we'll let you know so you can go check it out. When you find one of them, track them first. Information is more important than killing them right now. Do what you have to to get it, just make sure you don't get killed in the process."

They all nodded, "I'll take Rick with me." Gerald offered, "I trust him."

"I'll go with them," Sherm said.

Star surprised me, "I'll go with them too."

"Guess that leaves us three," Sarah said. "We'll team up."

I wouldn't want to be the monster that crossed paths with Sarah right now, especially since she was being backed by two of the better hunters I know, Susan and Teresa.

"All right." I said, "You guys find places to crash, split the two groups between different hotels. Keep your head down. Check the boards for jobs in Oklahoma or anywhere close to that that seem off. Let us know before you take off. As soon as we get locks on some other places we'll clue you in."

They all nodded. Gerald helped Rick get vertical and to his car again. Then the rest got in their cars and headed off. Once the last one was out of sight the tension in my shoulders made me notice just how keyed up I'd been. Sam blew a long breath out, ran his hand over his face and leaned against the wall. "That was close."

"I need a drink or five."

Coyote was still staring at where all the cars had just been, "I hope Rick calls his wife and tells them to move, now. We just killed him and possibly her as well. The wrong person finds out about that and they'll take out the whole family just to prove a point."

"Shit!" I'd forgotten to give him Krissy's number. "Sam, send him Krissy's number. She can help relocate them, remind him to give her my number too. He told me he had money stashed away, figured this would happen sooner or later. Hon, I told him we'd help his family if it came to it."

"Got it," she said, didn't even question it.

Sam pulled his phone out and started texting as Oliver and Roy walked up. Neither of them looked happy.

"I see why you wanted us," Oliver said, "Not exactly team players are they?"

"Or stable." Roy added. "You two are damn lucky that didn't blow up in your faces." Roy was getting more assertive it seemed.

"Hunters aren't known for tolerance or understanding in the best of times," Sam pointed out, "Finding out that two of their own unleashed Lucifer and have trafficked with the epitome of evil isn't liable to change that. I'm just happy we survived."

"Yeah, me too. Now what?"

"Back to the Bunker, check for leads and wait for Dig and Cas to check in."

"I think I'll stop by the store on the way," I said, "I need something stronger than what you have." Sam didn't drink as much as I did, not that I'd been drinking a lot this last year but this whole meeting just changed all that. I needed something dark, strong and old. Nice thing about making a lot more money, I could finally afford the better brands. "I'll see you in a few."

Coyote and I got into Baby, my hands were clammy as I gripped the wheel. People knew now. Word would travel, all those half whispered stories would all come back again. Gordon wasn't the only one who'd thought we'd deserved to die. I just hoped to hell that the fact that billions of people hadn't died would be taken into account, but as Sam said, hunters and tolerance don't usually go together.


	14. Bad News Bourbon

I drove into town and found the high end liquor store. I needed bourbon, it was that kind of day. Coyote followed me in and we worked our way back to the appropriate section.

She was looking at the prices as I walked towards the top shelf brands, "Babe, you're seriously going to take shots of $200 bourbon? Isn't that more of a taking time to savor it kind of price?"

"I can savor while I shoot, trust me." I found a bottle of 25 year old Jefferson's Presidential Select, pulled it off the shelf, paid for it and headed back out the door. Coyote stayed quiet, her and I may have hunted before but it wasn't on anything big like this. Back then, I was a lot less calculating about it. I knew she was worried though. "Okay, maybe I'll take one shot then drink it the right way. I'm not all that interested in getting plastered, or waking up tomorrow and realizing I just blew $200 by not appreciating what I was drinking." That took some the concern off her face.

We made it back to the Bunker, parked behind Sam's car and went down the stairs to join the rest of them. Sam was talking to someone on the phone, Oliver and Roy were sitting at the tables checking their phones.

"Any news?" I asked as I set the bottle on the side table where the tumblers and alcohol cabinet was.

Oliver looked up from his phone, "Dig says they're about an hour out, Sam's getting the hotels where your friends are staying at. He's going to deliver shot gun shells filled with that vampire killing brew to them. Felicity says it looks like Shayna's phone is still in the same place and she tracked down three members from the group that you ran into earlier. They are in the same area Shayna's phone is. It appears they are gathering there. Think we should head up there now?"

Sam turned his head and held up his hand asking for me to wait until he was done on the phone. "Let's wait till Sam's done," I said. Oliver nodded. "In the meantime, I got something that's more along your tastes Oliver, $200 bourbon, have some."

Sam stared at me and mouthed, "What the?" with a shocked look on his face while listening to whoever he was on the phone with.

"Hey, I got funds now. I can splurge when I want. You can have some too."

He scowled and turned away, I laughed and poured myself some. "Coyote?"

"Sure."

"I'll have some too," Oliver said.

Roy sighed, "Why not? How the hell do you still have a functioning liver Dean?"

"All right, bye," Sam said as he hung up the phone and shook his head, "It's pickled, and I have a sneaking suspicion that Cas fixes it whenever he heals him. Only way I can explain it."

"Could be," I agreed. I poured glasses for everyone, handed them out and took a sip. Oh man, shooting this was definitely not an option. There wasn't any bite to it, the flavors were so layered I had to roll it around my tongue for a second or two. As it slid down my throat, warming it while clearing out my sinuses in the best way possible, I knew going back to the cheap shit wasn't going to be possible. The heat spread through my chest and stomach, I just wanted to sit and enjoy it. Suddenly all those scenes with the rich guys sitting in the comfy chairs at some high end gentleman's club sipping bourbon and smoking cigars made sense. This was stuff that it was an event to drink, not just a way to numb yourself out. Damn.

Sam's eyes went wide after his drink and he lifted the glass up to eye level so he could watch the light filter through it. "Yeah, my earlier comments, just ignore. Get as much of this as you want Dean. Wow."

Coyote coughed, nodded and took another sip. "What Sam said."

Oliver smiled, "Money may not buy happiness but it definitely gives you options." He'd grown up drinking stuff like this so it didn't get him all excited.

Roy took a few sips, "Well, this definitely makes it much better to be drinking before noon."

We all sat down and took a few more seconds to enjoy the flavors, then I forced my brain back to monsters. "Sam? Think we should leave or wait for actual visual confirmation on Gordon?"

He took another drink, then swished the bourbon around in his glass as he pondered my question, "I think we should wait. Felicity texted, she said no one has accessed Shayna's email since that video, plus Shayna had all our emails tucked into a folder that was titled family stuff. Felicity said there was no sign of them in her inbox or sent folder. Which hopefully means Gordon has no idea about our resources or what Felicity can do. The monsters that are on their way could be going just to see if we show up. If we get there too soon Gordon will know we're tracking him somehow. Of course they could have nothing to do with what Gordon is doing either."

"So, we play dumb and old school hunter for now?"

"Yeah. I think so. Oliver?"

"I agree. I told Felicity to send photos of the new arrivals to Dig. He has three or four doses of nanites with him. If he can tag all of them we'll know more about what's going on."

"About that," Coyote said, "How does he tag people? I know these things are small but does he need to stab them with a needle? I'm not sure he can get close enough to do that."

A sneaky look broke out on Roy's face. He got up, went to his bag, ducked his hand inside. grabbed something, pulled his hand back out, walked to Coyote and set his hand on top of hers. "You've been tagged."

"Huh?"

He pulled his hand off of hers, there were no marks on her skin.

"I didn't feel a thing," She said.

Roy smiled, flipped his hand over and I noticed a black and silver ring on his ring finger that hadn't been there before.

"Incredibly small needles," Oliver explained, "We know someone who has put a lot of time and money into robotics and miniaturization. He took my existing tech and made it a lot more efficient. The black band holds the nanites, we twist the band to prime the needles. All it takes is a light touch on bare skin and the nanites deploy into the skin."

"That's it," I said, "You're officially Batman now."

"Or James Bond," Sam added.

Roy laughed, "Both work. He has the money, toys and the looks."

Oliver scowled, "Really?"

"Well you do," Roy answered.

Oliver took the opportunity to include me in his scowling, "Now that you mention it," I said, "Bond works better. Felicity's like a female version of Q." I was going to add that she had the looks to be a Bond girl but since they usually end up dead I figured that'd be pushing it too far.

My phone rang, it was Gerald. "Hey, what's up?"

"A slaughter, that's what. Susan found it on the net, texting you and Sam the links. Tell us what the plan is after you see it." He hung up.

"Who..." Sam started to ask just as our phones both went off. "Oh."

We clicked on the link and I immediately knew two things. First, we'd be lucky if every hunter within a two hundred mile radius didn't jump on this and fight us tooth and nail when we told them to stay home. Second, the stakes had just skyrocketed, they weren't even being subtle. Five bodies, three of which were kids, completely drained of blood, complete with holes in the neck had been found about two hours from the Bunker. Which made me wonder if somehow they knew where we were. Which would not me good at all. Although I couldn't see how, Sam never brought hunters here. Maybe they were just trying to capitalize on us having been spotted in Oklahoma.

"Mother fuckers!" Sam snarled, "That's Matt and his family."

"What? There's no pics on this link."

"I searched after I saw the headline."

I thought the stakes were going to jump because of the kids and they were obvious fresh kills, a hunter family was a million times worse. Sam got on his laptop.

Oliver, Roy and Coyote had all set their glasses down and the humor drained from the room.

"Look." He pulled up an article with pics.

"He's been out of the game for what? Two years now?" I asked.

"Three," Sam confirmed, "Completely off the hunter grid."

"How the hell did they find him?"

"Fill me in," Oliver ordered.

"Those are vampire kills," Roy snarled. "Fresh ones too."

"Hold on," I called Gerald back.

"Yeah?"

"Do you know who that was?" I asked, "Your link didn't have pics.

"Yeah, I saw the kills, just searched and saw it was Matt. This is fucked up."

Sam's laptop started binging like crazy and his phone blew up with alerts.

"Anyone know Matt well? Still talk to him?" I asked.

"Not sure."

"Find out. We need to figure out how they found him. Give Sam and I twenty minutes, we'll call you back."

"Got it."

Sam was typing up a storm. "Stop," I told him, "Close that thing up and let's think this through. Any ideas Oliver?" This was way out of our league.

Sam wasn't happy about it but he pushed the laptop away and focused on us, not the screen.

I've seen Oliver cold, I've seen him kill, I have a pretty damn good idea what lurks underneath his surface, but I'd never seen him this calculating. Sam and my's past has pretty much been running around and putting out fires, saving the world or whatever. We've never had someone actively targeting us, not like this. Oliver had, but even then, the set of his face, the emptiness of his eyes was nothing like I'd ever seen from him before. I got the feeling I was looking at an assassin calmly plotting how to take out his next target. "They are trying to instill panic, fear, or irrational attacks," he said, "I can almost promise you that a group of them are there waiting for whoever shows up. The fact that they found a hunter who's not active was not an accident. They want you to think that they are already within your network, they know all about you and you have no chance against them."

"Maybe Gordon knew him from before," Coyote suggested, "And tracked him down somehow. If he's still thinking like a hunter he could pull the FBI person of interest thing, run searches with different departments until he came across him."

"Maybe, or just search the net. Who knows how long Gordon's been topside gathering intel." Sam pointed out.

"Gordon was damn good back in the day," I reminded them, "We need to stop thinking of him as a vamp and think of him as a hunter. Not that many hunters know we killed him, if he showed up out of the blue at the old haunts and started asking questions no one would think anything was out of the ordinary. Remember, hunters can go years at a time without running into each other. He could have patched together enough info to know Sam and I were based out of Kansas."

Oliver took that in, "Which means you have no idea what he knows. You're playing catch up."

"Yeah."

Oliver got up and started pacing, "That video, he was arrogant. He thinks he has the upper hand. I doubt he expected you to share that video with other hunters. You two have always been tight lipped about your history in the past. He is most likely expecting you to tear ass there and try to catch him. He may or may not be there, either way more than likely there are several of his allies waiting for you or whoever shows up."

"Dean," Sam said, "Dig will be there in less than an hour. We need to know where Gordon is first."

"No, we really don't." I finished off my drink, "We split the difference and throw a wrench into his game plan. He's made his statement, now we do. It could take hours for them to find Gordon, the hunters won't wait. We claim this hunt over the email so that if he is watching he knows we took the bait. You and I act like the old days, Fed threads, Baby, whole nine. Oliver, Roy and Coyote follow in a rental. It blends better than your car. We talk to the cops while they hang out close by and Coyote scopes out monsters. If we find any, we lead them to some out of the way place, kill them, grab their phones and see if we can talk to the monster in charge. If we get a hold of Gordon, we call him out and set him up."

Oliver shook his head, "No, not that last part. You grab their phones, find Gordon, catch him and have a nice long talk. You set up a show down we'll be outnumbered when it happens. This needs stealth. Remember, Gordon may not be the one in charge. We need to find out who is. This could all be a distraction from something else."

"We're assuming Gordon is even involved with this slaughter," Coyote pointed out. "He could of gone off book with Shayna. Maybe running out of patience."

I knew planning was important, I really did, but I was rapidly sliding past the point where I cared why or who. Gordon or someone was coming after my people, this made seven deaths in less three days. "Bodies are stacking up, the longer we sit here and throw ideas around the more people he's going to kill. We move, now."

Sam nodded and pulled his laptop back towards him, "I'll claim the hunt and tell everyone else to stay put."

"I'll hook up a rental," Coyote offered, "Oliver's already paid for one. I hope we made enough vamp killing shells. We should give some of the brew to the others on the way out so they can start making some too."

"You three go do that," I said, "Sam and I will go the other way, get a jump start on the drive. Meet up there. We'll be heading straight to the police station, text you the address when we get there in case they have more than one. Oliver, Roy, you guard Coyote. Any sign of anything not human, let us know."

"I'll grab the earpieces," Sam added.

I thought about that for a second, "You wear it, your hair will cover it up. Vamps have sharp eyes."

"Got it. I'll grab one for you anyway, just in case."

"Ten minutes?" I asked.

He nodded. "Yeah, I'll be ready. I call Gerald too."

I looked over at Roy and Oliver, "Sound good?"

They exchanged a quick glance then Oliver nodded, "Yes. We don't have shotguns though."

"Sure you still know how to use one?" I needled him, "It's been a few years since you and I took out those demons."

"Point it at the bad guy, pull the trigger thingy?" He played along.

"Well done. We'll get you using modern technology yet." The irony in that statement didn't escape anyone there. "We'll hook you up before we take off. I'm going to go pack my stuff." I got up and walked down the hall, I heard footsteps behind me. I knew who they belonged to without even turning around. She waited until we got into the room and shut the door behind us. I turned to face her, she didn't say a word as her arms wrapped around me and her lips met mine. I pulled my arms tight around her and let the kiss take as long as she wanted it to. We both knew that once we hit the road more than likely we wouldn't be sharing a room or be showing any kind of affection. I had to reset things back to when Sam and I hunted to pull this off. At least for this trip, and probably until we took care of whoever was in charge of this.

She finally pulled away, she wasn't hiding anything from me. I saw her fear, her anger at Gordon, her disgust at the kills and sorrow about Shayna, Tom and a family of hunters she didn't even know. I let the walls slide away, let her see what was going on inside my mind as well. I knew she could see some of it with her Shaman skills but I wanted to make the effort not to run from it, not bury it like I always had. Show it to someone, anyone before I had to turn back into that man that hid everything, hid it till it nearly destroyed him.

Her hands cupped my face as she leaned her forehead against mine, "I wonder if they'll have that brand of bourbon on the ship."

God I love her. "We can always sneak it on board."

I saw the corners of her lips curl into a smile before, "We'll have to stuff that bag with bubble wrap or we'll reek."

"Darlin' it's a cruise, from what I hear everyone's plastered."

She forced out a laugh but there wasn't much happiness behind it. "Be careful, please. Don't let him get too much farther under your skin. It's happening already, I can see it."

I wanted to tell her that I wouldn't but that would be a lie, "I'll try to keep a leash on it." I knew myself too well to think he wouldn't push my buttons on some level. I just had to keep him from pushing all of them.


	15. We've Got Work To Do

I gave her another kiss but ended it sooner than the first one. If I didn't I'd probably never leave, she understood and backed away. All those emotions she'd been showing vanished. She was back to business, that helped me focus. I got my bathroom stuff, just in case we'd be gone for a few days, packed clothes, walked past her to my old room and rooted around under the bed for the box of bullets. It was right where I'd left it, "Perfect, looks like I'm back in business." I told her as she waited in the threshold of the room.

"You know, Sam does have a point about the silenced 9 mils being a lot less likely to attract attention."

I stood back up and shoved the box into my bag. "Pssh, if I'm killing something I want the full effect. Firing one of those things is just so damn anti-climatic."

"Ahh, I see, it's a mood thing."

"Exactly. If I'm hunting, it's going to be loud and old school."

Laughter danced in her eyes but she managed not to smile, "Just like Baby huh?"

"Damn straight!" I managed to keep the mood light-ish but inside I was anything but. I needed the Purgatory blade. I'd already decided that was how I was going to end Gordon this time, then I was going to torch his fucked up ass and make damn sure he stayed down there. I made my way back to where the rest of them were, I hadn't seen the blade when I went into the armory the first time. Sam probably filed it somewhere under weapons we don't ever want to see again. "Hey."

Sam looked up from his laptop, "Yeah?"

I was starting to wonder if he'd even started packing yet. Then I realized he probably still had a bag always packed like I used to. "Where's my blade? The one I brought back."

It took him a second, I'd brought a few things back over the years, "From Purgatory?"

"Yup."

He hesitated as his eyes shifted to Coyote who was next to me, I saw her nod slightly. Apparently they were tag teaming keeping an eye on me, I guess I shouldn't be all that surprised. "Back of the armory, cabinet, here." He tossed me a set of keys. "The green one."

I caught the keys and looked at them. He'd bought those color coded key holder things, I just hope the lock wasn't painted green to make it overtly obvious which key went where. That would sort of defeat the purpose of having a secret lair and all. I chose not to say that out loud though, "Got it. Thanks."

Coyote chose not to follow me, she'd said and done everything she could for now. Ultimately, me staying on an even keel was up to me, she knew it, so did I. I opened the door to the armory, located the cabinet, the lock was not painted green, unlocked it and opened the door. All my old weapons that Sam chose not to use were there and they were spotless. He'd maintained them just like I would have, damn. My machete was there, most of my guns, my favorite sawed off, the Purgatory blade, they all gleamed in the bright white light from the ceiling fixtures. I knew he'd maintain Baby but part of me expected him to just lock these up. Sam's always liked to carry less stuff and be more efficient and Roy wouldn't use the guns as much as I did. I should have known better. I checked the barrels of some of the guns, there wasn't even the slightest bit of dust and they were all freshly oiled. I wondered how many times he'd cleaned them since I'd moved out and what he thought of when he did. Even though in a lot of ways he's always been the most independent of the two of us, it had to get to him being here all alone. Sam was never one for solitude. I didn't feel guilty for moving out, it was probably the only thing that had saved me, but seeing this, it felt like Sam was somehow a guardian of part of me, my past. Which was a damn weird thing to feel. Or maybe he'd just always known at some point or other I'd be back in it and would be pissed as hell if my stuff was dirty. I'd go with that, less weird.

I put the guns back and grabbed the bone hilt of the blade. Nothing hit me, no memories, no crappy emotions. I'd take that as a win. I set it on the countertop next to the cabinet and picked out what I wanted to add to the stash in the trunk and filled another bag with them. Then I locked the doors, picked up the blade, my bag and the vamp killing shells then went to go see what the rest were up to.

"That's some blade," Roy said when he saw me. "That's from Purgatory?"

"Yeah."

He took a closer look at it and noticed what it was made of, "Is that a bone?"

And let the reassessment of me begin, "Yeah, I took it off someone else, didn't make it myself. And no, I don't know where the bone's from but seeing as how all that's down there are monsters, I'll let you put two and two together."

He got a slightly sick look on his face but didn't say anything else. Oliver raised one eyebrow, cocked his head a bit to the side but left it at that. He'd survived on an island, I'm sure he'd made do with what he could find, no matter where it came from. Coyote didn't even look at it, maybe she'd seen in it our shared dreams.

Sam shut his laptop, "All right, job claimed as ours. I told Gerald and the rest to sit tight for now, but I sent out over the email that a group of hunters was going to Kansas City, Missouri to check out a hunt there. One of my researchers found something plausible enough to check out. Let's see if that makes any monsters show up. It's a big city, Felicity is going to hack into as many traffic cams as she can to monitor the place. If she sees anyone she's going to text us so we can call Gerald. It's a four hour drive, they can check it out same day."

"Sneaky, I like. You ready?"

"Yeah, I gave Oliver the extra shotguns and vamp killing shells already." He reached under the table and grabbed his bag.

"I got Coyote's stash of weapons in Baby, grab your favorites from you car and add it to the pile.

Coyote spoke up, "I got the rental while you were in the armory. Sam's letting me take his car to take Oliver to get it. I'll take the extra vamp death juice to Gerald then lock Sam's car up in the garage, he gave me spare keys, then we'll follow you. Anything else you guys can think of?"

"Vamp killing stuff, Purgatory blade, guns, underwear...nope, think I got everything." I replied. That got a half smile out of Oliver, which, with the situation we were looking at I figured was about equal to him falling to the floor laughing. Sam didn't say a word, Roy was still trying to process the fact that I was holding a bone attached to a jagged obsidian blade by strips of leather as calmly as he would a bow, while Coyote kept her face completely serious.

"Good," she said, "It sucks getting to a hunt and realizing that you don't have clean underwear to change into after getting the shit kicked out of you."

"Sure does." I wanted to hold onto her and never let go but I couldn't, "Sam? Let's roll. We'll see ya'll in a few hours."

We walked out, he grabbed a few things out of his car, put them in Baby then we got in. I turned the key, Soundgarden's Fell on Black Days started up, "Well, that fits."

" _Whatsoever I've feared has_  
 _Come to life_  
 _Whatsoever I've fought off_  
 _Became my life_

 _Just when everyday_  
 _Seemed to greet me with a smile_  
 _Sunspots have faded_  
 _And now I'm doing time_  
 _Now I'm doing time_

 _'Cause I fell on_  
 _Black days_  
 _I fell on_  
 _Black days"_

"I think Baby just knows what to play," Sam said.

"Yeah." I pulled onto the road. "It's not nearly as handy when the bad guys come back from the dead."

"Does tend to screw things up."

 _"Whomsoever I've cured_

 _I've sickened now_

 _Whomsoever I've cradled_

 _I've put you down_

 _I'm a searchlight soul they say_  
 _But I can't see it in the night_  
 _I'm only faking_  
 _When I get it right_  
 _When I get it right"_

"Do we want to theorize as to how many other things got out of Purgatory and who this Alpha is?" He asked.

"Would it make any damn difference?" We hit the freeway and I accelerated to get into the fast lane as soon as I could. I wasn't in the mood for backwoods driving and I wanted to get there quick. "We can toss around ideas, but let's just save time and assume all of them and the Alpha Vamp. That way if it's not, we can have a pleasant surprise for once instead of a fucked up one."

He shrugged and looked out his window, "All right."

"Instead of that, let's talk about Cas. Did you know he's on Heaven's do not invite to anything, ever again, list?"

"Not officially, no." He didn't turn to look at me, "But I had a feeling. He's spent weeks at a time at the Bunker, won't even mention any other angels and won't tell me what he's doing when he's gone. When he is hanging out with me something's off. Yeah, he's gotten a bit more of a sense of humor, but it's pretty forced, even for Cas. He doesn't belong here, and it's starting to wear on him."

"It's not just that, he's not even allowed to talk to angels, not even on angel radio. A silent treatment there's no escape from because as long as he's got Grace he can feel them. Sam, he's choosing not to turn off angel radio, he feels it's some sort of penance. This exile is a mercy."

That got his attention, "He has a point, he's lucky he's not locked up like Gadreel was or dead, but still. Damn."

" _How would I know?_  
 _That this could be my fate_  
 _How would I know?_  
 _That this could be my fate_

 _So what you wanted to see good_  
 _Has made you blind_  
 _And what you wanted to be yours_  
 _Has made it mine_

 _So don't you lock up something_  
 _That you wanted to see fly_  
 _Hands are for shaking_  
 _No, not tying_  
 _No, not tying"_

The song ended, which was just fine by me. I didn't need anything else to make my mood worse. "So he never told you?"

He shook his head, "No."

"Damn. I think he's in trouble, like depressed. He made a comment about how he'll always be just a tool for someone else to use and if that was the case, he'd rather us use him than God or Heaven. This whole possible Purgatory prison break scenario hit him hard. He thinks it's his fault and that the portal could still be open, but he's screwed because Heaven wants nothing to do with us anymore so he can't really tell them to go check it out."

That hadn't made him too happy, "Like Heaven ever wanted anything to do with us anyway,"

"You know how he is. I had to ride his ass to not go run off and check Purgatory because we need him, but the more he thinks about this.."

"Yeah, I know." He interrupted, "Wow, this is like old times."

"So, ideas?"

"About helping depressed angels? Uh, no, not really."

"Well, think about it."

"All right."

The rest of the trip was pretty quiet, we pulled into town and followed our standard hunter protocol. Find dingy ass, cheap motel, check in, put on Fed threads, go talk to cops. This town only had two cop stations so we went to the closest one. Felicity had filled us in that Mark had owned a house here, bought it about five years ago. He was working at the local gun shop, his wife worked at a grocery store and the kids were in school. Seems they'd blended in well enough. I sent the address to the cop station to Coyote and we pulled into a restaurant across the street to wait for Coyote, and get lunch.

We took a seat on the patio of the place and I was quickly reminded of how much fun it is wondering which of the people around you is out to kill you. Normally our hunts aren't that bad, but trying to pretend I wasn't on edge, when I was, took some getting used to. Sam played his role perfectly, laptop opened, talking about the case like we had no background info and laying plans for the next steps. I followed along, inserting appropriate smart ass cynicism while keeping an eye on the traffic and who was looking at us. I pegged three people, two women and a guy, who seemed way too interested in our conversation. They all seemed to be our age, dressed in normal street clothes and looking at their phones. The problem was their eyes weren't all that focused on their screens and their fingers weren't moving all that often. So either they were watching crappy movies or were just pretending. I added the fact that they were all trying rather hard to stay out of the sun in and figured we had some winners. I nudged Sam's leg with my foot.

He looked up and I shifted my eyes towards the guy then right back to Sam, "Poor guy, those two chicks over there," I moved my finger in their general direction. "The short haired brunette and the punky blonde."

Sam nodded, "Yeah?"

"They keep sneaking looks his way but he's not even paying attention. If he'd look up from his phone he might be able to get some threesome action going. They kind of go together don't you think?" The blonde gave it away, her eyes jerked towards me then went right back to her screen which made her brunette friend shoot her a pretty pissed off sideways glare. The guy immediately started typing and I heard the blonde's phone go off. She shoved her phone in her bag, got up awfully quick and left. Amateurs. Fortunately, I saw Coyote pull up right then. She'd texted me the make, model and plates of the rental. I, unlike those idiots, have a girlfriend that's a pro who I happen to have on speed dial along with a Facetime app. She picked up on the first ring. I just kept talking to Sam. "Well damn, guess our friend is down to one playmate, since the hot blonde figured he wasn't worth the time to keep an eye on. Too bad, chick with a punk cut like that is bound to know some tricks."

"Brown pants, black blouse?" Coyote texted.

"Yup." Sam replied, "Sucks to be him. Maybe he should try to update his look."

I tilted the phone up enough so she could see the tables where the two were sitting, "Who the hell wears pinstripes these days anyway?"

I saw Roy get out of the back seat and follow the blonde. That'd help.

"Well, maybe he'll have better luck with the brunette," I continued, "At least her pants match his shirt. Sort of." She was wearing black and white striped spandex pants.

"All three, vamps." Popped up on my screen, great.

I put it back on the table and tapped the screen to get Sam to look at it. He glanced at it, but nothing showed on his face as he shoved his empty plate away, "Guess we should get moving."

"Yeah. We've got cops to talk to."

We acted like nothing interesting was happening, just two guys doing their job. As soon as we got off the porch I took a quick look back, wonder of wonders, both of them had disappeared. I glanced back towards the car. Coyote was leaning against the hood and Oliver was nowhere to be seen. The two must have headed off in the same direction and Oliver was following along. Coyote ran her hand through her hair and lingered by her ear for a second.

"Time to listen," I muttered to Sam who immediately put his hand on his right ear and scratched at it. He'd put the earpiece in as soon as we'd gotten into town.

"Kind of surprised we get such great cell reception here," he replied. "When I called the office earlier, it sounded like they were right next to me."

All this talking in code was kind of entertaining, sort of felt like I was in a spy movie. "Your government at work I guess." We walked into the station and spent the next half hour harassing cops, who of course had no useful information. We didn't really need them anyway. Oliver and Roy had followed the three to the same building, had set up surveillance on it and had seen two other people go in. Coyote was hanging by us to make sure no monsters visited the station while we were there. We did get the full location on the crime scene though, which was nice. I figured that should be our next stop. If we were going to get jumped by multiple vamps I wanted it to be as far away from innocent people as possible. Especially if Gordon somehow managed to show up, I didn't want to worry about collateral damage during that fight.


	16. The Reckoning Begins

We left the cop shop, no monsters in the area as far as Coyote could see. Roy had reported in that three more people had gone into the building they were watching. It was an old warehouse that seemed to be abandoned so they were assuming everyone who headed in there were working together. That made eight possible monsters. I waited to say something until we were in Baby with the windows rolled up and driving back to the motel. "They're like fucking cockroaches I swear. Where the hell are all these guys coming from?"

"No idea," Sam was looking as concerned as I was feeling, "You want to take them out there and bail or head out to the crime scene and keep acting like we're clueless?"

"Let me call Cas, see if he and Dig have found anything out yet, like a mass migration of monsters leaving Oklahoma." I dialed Cas's number.

"Dean."

"Cas." He didn't say anything, as usual, "Find anything?"

"No, which is why I have yet to call you."

I got the feeling I had to clarify that, "No meaning no monsters, or no Gordon?"

"We have found monsters, we have not found Gordon. I thought he was the priority. There are monsters in every city around the world so I didn't feel it was important to report that."

I was half tempted to hand the phone to Sam and just give up, "Are the monsters doing anything odd?"

"Well, by nature, they are odd, compared to humans..."

"Cas!" I tried to rein in my usual irritation, "Sorry, is Dig there? Can I talk to him?"

"Of course."

"Hey there Dean," Dig said.

"Fill me in."

"Right, no Gordon as of yet. According to Cas we're looking at ten vamps and two werewolves. Just like to say I really didn't need to know the percentage of monsters to humans in any given city. Cas filled me on that, wasn't all that comforting. These guys are hanging out by a roadhouse, fortunately there's a motel across the street, that's where we are. They don't seem too happy to be hanging out in such close proximity with each other, get the feeling they're waiting for someone or something. I suggested heading over there to listen in but Cas said they may pick up on him being an angel, figured I'd wait to hear from you before deciding the best course here."

"Hold on," I relayed all that to Sam, then put the phone on speaker, "You're on speaker, Sam's with me. We've got about eight vamps snooping around where we are, Oliver and Roy are watching them. We're deciding if we want to take them out where they stand now or play this game a little longer. Sam?"

I had no idea how they would pick up on Cas being an angel unless he smelled different from people, which could make sense, I guess.

"It depends on how quick we want to put it out there that we're doing things differently. We really still have no idea what's going on other than Gordon and I'm highly doubting he was able to get this many things to follow him. He wasn't exactly the easiest person to get along with. I think he's part of this, but not running it. As soon as we tip our hand they're going to react and change things up, which could make things a lot more complicated."

He had a point, but I kind of wanted to stir them up. "I've always thought the fastest way to get people to screw up was push them. You know that."

He frowned, "Yeah, it's also the fastest way to get in over our heads."

"You both have a point," Dig said, "But both of you are overlooking something, the longer you two are out in the field, wide open like this, the more of them can track you down. They don't have to drive, remember? Talk to Oliver, maybe take on the group there, tag one or two with nanites, snag one for questioning and kill the rest. The ones that get away can lead you to the next rung of the ladder. That's how we usually do it."

"Sounds like a plan to me," I said, Sam looked pretty interested in that option too.

He nodded, "Could work. You guys stay put, just watch for now. We'll talk to Oliver and get back to you. Thanks for the update. Anything changes, let us know."

"Yup, would have called sooner but I agreed with Cas, nothing really interesting was happening yet. We cased the whole town, these were all the bad guys we found."

"All right. Thanks."

"Yup, talk to you soon." Dig hung up.

"Get the feeling that if Cas had ever bothered to tell us about what is really out there monster wise our lives would have been million times more depressing?" I asked.

"How about we not go there? I don't need to know the actual stats on how many monsters exist. Hold on."

I saw him press his ear, or should I say earpiece. "Oliver, call us when you can. Need to plan and easier if we talk on speakerphone." He dropped his hand away and looked at me, "Just in case he's hanging off the side of the building or listening through a window."

"Both of which are distinct possibilities."

Sam's phone rang a few seconds later. He answered it and just dove right in. "Oliver?"

"Yes."

"Talked to Dig, they've got eyes on a group of monsters, no Gordon. Monsters aren't all that thrilled to be rubbing elbows. Dig and Cas are in a motel across from a roadhouse where the monsters are. Dig says we should take this group on, tag a few with nanites and let them report back, take one to talk to and kill the rest. Your thoughts?"

There was nothing but empty air for a minute or two. "I agree," he finally said, "This area is empty, minimal chance for anyone to see us and police response time should be fairly slow. We can call in a fake shots fired call on the other side of town if need be. We're not heavily outnumbered and the building they are in is a smaller warehouse, only two entrances, first floor windows are barred, second floor are not. Roy and I have found sight lines already to cover you when you guys go in. We're still at only eight people inside, we do need Coyote to confirm if they're all monsters though."

"We'll assume they are for now," Sam said, "The chances of a human being in there and not being food is pretty low."

"Roy said the same thing," Oliver continued. "We'll text you the address, send your eta. Anything else?"

"No, hang tight, we'll change and be there asap," I told him.

"Fine." He hung up.

I texted Coyote what the plan was and to hang back while we changed at the motel, then I got Oliver's text with the address and forwarded it to her. She replied that no one was tailing us so she'd coordinate with Oliver to make sure we indeed had eight monsters on our hands, she also said that they'd grabbed all of Roy's weapons from the armory and enough machetes for the three of them along with picking up Oliver's bow and arrows from the UPS place so they were set. We hustled to the motel, changed hopped back into Baby and looked up the address. It wasn't too far.

"Be there in 15." I texted Oliver.

He called almost immediately after I sent it, I accepted the call and he was all business. "Since we're trying to keep our existence hidden till the last second, you and Sam planning to bust in the front and go in guns blazing which is how I hear you used to act or do you want to be subtle. It will make a difference on how we cover you. Roy reminded me you two aren't used to working with backup so let's take a second to plan our moves here."

"They aren't expecting us," Sam said, "They have no idea we know where they are. Let's go in full on assault mode, catch them flat footed. Add in the new shells and we have even more of advantage."

"How are we tagging them with nanites?" I asked. "Sam and I...wait, nanite arrows?"

"Of course," Oliver replied, not sounding the least bit awkward about it. Who knew you could do so much with arrows? Seriously.

"Sam and I will go in the front, stir them up. You and Roy tag a few, hopefully they'll be too focused on us tearing them to shreds to try to figure out where the arrows are coming from."

"Roy says to tell you that he got the skunk shit too," Oliver said, "Whatever that is."

Sam grinned, "Good, fair warning. It's strong as hell but the vamps won't pick up your scent. I'd forgotten about it. Tell Roy good job."

"Skunk shit?" I asked.

"Eau de Vamps Can't Smell You," Sam replied, "Got tired of dragging along all the herbs required to make that shit Dad used, plus it was a pain using it in a city. This stuff just rubs on. Smells horrible but seems to work.

"Okay, we using it?"

"Nope, we want them to smell us."

"Good." Roy was thinking way ahead then, he'd definitely learned a lot over the past year. "All right, that's the plan. We plow in, old school style, you guys do your ninja thing. Coyote should be there soon, tell her the plan, work her into the cover fire set up. Sound good?"

"Yes," Oliver stated, "We'll be ready by the time you get here. Don't call or signal anything, just act normal. They have someone keeping an eye on the front door. We're hidden, wind is going the wrong direction so I doubt he's smelled us either. I'll tell Coyote how to get here and stay out of sight. We have your backs. See you in fifteen." He hung up.

I started Baby up and turned onto the street. Oliver's last words rang in my head, the idea of people having our backs on a hunt wasn't something I was used to and I was a lot calmer heading into a fight with eight vamps than I normally would be. Sure, we'd worked together a few times in the past, Oliver's crew and Sam and I, but that was for one off weird jobs. This was a weird job too, but it was fairly obvious that Oliver and the rest were in it for the duration, which took a ton of weight off my shoulders. Another little piece of why Sam had been more relaxed over the last year clicked. He had other people to watch his back, not just me or Roy. All the new toys, the site, the email, he'd incorporated Oliver's team into hunting, it wasn't he and Roy against the world like it had been for us. It hit me just how good it felt to not be alone in this job, it also brought back a sea of memories about Bobby and I had to clamp those down quick. Not the time or place for them.

The adrenaline kicked in as I made the last turn and headed into a shady, run down industrial district. Ah home sweet hunt, all it needed was a few flickering lights and it'd be perfect. It was still early in the afternoon though so no street lights were on. We checked the addresses as we drove.

"Dean, see him?"

"Yeah." Pinstripe shirt guy had been standing in the middle of the sidewalk about two blocks away, he was the only person out and about so wasn't too hard to miss. He spotted us and ditched inside a building as we pulled up. I shoved the gas pedal down, I wasn't about to let them get set for something, "Nope, not happening." I slammed on the brakes just as we pulled even with the door. Sam and I had tossed the shotguns on the floor of the backseat under some blankets. As soon as I'd accelerated Sam had leaned over the seat, threw the blankets off and grabbed the guns. Baby screeched to stop, I slammed her into park, pulled the keys out, shoved them in my pocket and bolted out of the door. I barely looked back as Sam tossed me a gun over her roof. I yanked the door wide open, idiots hadn't locked it and Sam fired off a shot to clear the space in front of us.

I heard someone scream, and keep screaming as their voice hit an almost supersonic pitch. I thought I was going to have two punctured eardrums in another second or two. I yanked my sunglasses off, I'd worn them so it wouldn't take my eyes so long to adjust to the dark, and wasn't at all prepared for the vampire's reaction, judging by the open mouthed, terrified looks on the other vamps faces, they hadn't been either.

Sam had gotten damn lucky and nailed a black haired, dark skinned, male vamp who was now writhing on the floor, literally smoking and sweating blood. His eyes were bulging out of his head, his skin was shriveling an aging as we watched and more and more smoke started filling the air around him. He couldn't even form words, all he was doing was howling in sheer agony. He went completely stiff, fingers locked into place as his back arched. Then a huge mass of blood came hurtling out his mouth, projectile vomit style and his screams stopped, just stopped. They didn't fade out, one minute I thought my ears were going to bleed, the next it was completely silent. Fucking Magnus could have mentioned this somewhere, a footnote would have been nice. Damn bastard.

"Tell Gordon that's what happens when he comes after our people," Sam said, cold as fucking ice. Holy shit, where the hell had that come from. He fired again and another vamp started howling, that was my cue. I nailed another one before they scattered. Three down. Sam got close to my ear, he had to so I could hear him over the howling.

"All vamps."

I heard arrows fly out of somewhere and saw two of them sprout arrows out of their chests. They turned to run but fell over before they got too far. Dead Man's Blood hits pretty quick. The rest had disappeared behind boxes and abandoned equipment. The warehouse was medium sized, two stories and had the usual dust covered floors and cracked windows, you've seen one, you've seen them all. There were stacks of boxes scattered here and there. We had our two to talk to, three were dead which left three unaccounted for.

"You missed bastard!" A male voice came from the back right hand corner.

"No, he didn't," Sam muttered, "Oliver tagged him."

"Time to make them run home to Daddy then."

Sam signaled two were hiding behind the boxes to the right and one was close to the back door, Oliver or Roy must have been relaying positions to him. I leaned close to his ear, "Go over the top, you're tall enough, I'll come from the side."

The boxes were stacked maybe seven feet up, there was a smaller stack of boxes in front of the ones where the vamps were hiding. Sam nodded and kicked at a box as we walked toward the stack. It sounded solid enough to hold his weight. He bolted towards the stack, I dodged around the only open side. The boxes were stacked up against the wall so there was only two ways for them to run. Back towards the door, or straight at me. Either way I'd hit them. The box held Sam's weight just fine, he was over the top and firing just as I cleared the stack. The last two were female, one red head and one who's hair was dyed purple. They lunged to try to avoid the shots, the red head I aimed at almost did but the nails still drove into her arm, Sam nailed the purple haired chick through the forehead as she looked up at him. They didn't die any quieter or easier than the other three had. I almost felt sorry for them, almost.

We heard the back door slam shut. I stared at the barrel of the shotgun, "Holy fucking shit! Why the hell didn't the Men of Letters tell hunters about this shit? Were they complete fucking idiots?"

Now that the threat was gone, Sam could gape at the charred and smoking corpses in front of us. "They must have really hated Magnus to discount something like this."

I remembered Henry's first comments to us and the hours of reading their personal journals over the years, "No, it wasn't Magnus they discounted, it was hunters. They probably saw no reason to share it. Remember, we were mindless apes to them. Fucking bastards. The amount of lives this could have saved over the years." Almost every single on of them had thought hunters were second, hell, third class citizens. We didn't contribute anything useful to the world of magic or research, just killed things. Something like this, if any of them had actually bothered to read Magnus's research, would have been seen as an idle, useless, discovery. They'd never seen vamps up close, they were all safe in their little warded worlds. As much as I hated Abaddon, there were times I was glad she gotten the best of them. This was one of them. Arrogant assholes.

"Get pissed about that later," Sam said as he walked towards the two that were laying on the ground moaning. I followed him and we each put a barrel to their heads. The one my gun was resting on was a guy, looked to be late forties, he was in jeans, a black t-shirt and tennis shoes. Sam's soon to be corpse just happened to be pinstripe guy.

"How?" Pinstripe guy gasped.

Sam slammed his foot into the guy's chest. "No, I ask, you answer."

I had no idea where this side of Sam had come from, whether it was being responsible for someone else or not having me there to do the threatening for him over the last year but it was downright scary how cold he was. I knew he still had his soul, but damn.

"First question," I took over, "Where the hell is Gordon?"

"Fuck off," Pinstripe replied.

I nudged my guy, "Your turn. Three seconds, same question."

He tried to look tough but that's hard to do when you're half zoned out and in pain, "Gordon's the least of your worries Winchesters," he slurred, "We're coming for you, for all of you."

"Right." I pulled out a shotgun shell, broke it open and pulled one of the nails out. "Let's see what this does." I stabbed mine in the hand, he went through a quieter version of what his fellow vamps had but no smoke rose from him, "Here's the deal, this will pass in about fifteen minutes," I was pulling that out of my ass, "if you answer, I don't dose you again, if you don't, I do. Your choice." Then I stabbed pinstripe guy with a nail and let them writhe and scream. "Well?" It took them less than two minutes. By then they were ripping chunks of their skin off with their claws, their fangs were fully showing but they couldn't coordinate themselves enough to get upright or take a shot at us.

My guy broke first, "Montana! He's in Montana! That's all I know! Make it stop! Please!"

Pinstripe guy managed to hiss at my guy and somehow got enough control of his arm back to take a swipe at Sam, a slow and clumsy swipe, but a swipe nonetheless. Sam stepped back and shot him. He skipped over the supersonic screams and just went limp. Magnus had said if you stacked doses it acted faster.

"Anything else?" I asked without skipping a beat, "Who are the Alphas?"

"D..don't know...no one does..."

"How many of there are you?" Sam asked.

"More than enough," he managed to bluster a bit, the dose must be starting to wear off.

"Where in Montana?" I wanted specifics and I couldn't dose him again.

"Don't know."

Time to bluff, I leaned towards him again, "You sure you don't."

He raised his head up, I pushed him back using the barrel of the gun. He managed to fight back enough to not end up flat on his back, "You hunters will soon cower in the darkened spaces hiding from us. The tide is turning Winchesters." Then he committed suicide by hunter, he growled and came straight for me. I pulled the trigger and turned away.

Oliver, Roy and Coyote walked up from various directions while he screamed. By the time they reached me the screams had ended. "Well, those are definitely effective," Oliver said.

Coyote nudged one of them with her boot, "We need to share that recipe, immediately. At least to Gerald and his crew. We gave them some but it wouldn't hurt for them to know what's in it and that it works."

"We'll make it public knowledge after we stop whatever this is," I said. "But yeah, we'll tell Gerald. It won't be so easy next time. We got lucky."

"No," Oliver disagreed, "You planned ahead. Makes a difference. Next move?"

"Back to the Bunker, see what the fallout of this..." My phone rang, it was Dig. "Yeah?"

"I think you made an impression. They all just smoked tires getting out of here. Want us to follow?"

"Yeah."

"All right."

I hung up that time. I was getting tired of everyone else hanging up first. "Looks like we got someone's attention, Dig's group just bailed in a hurry. He's following them."

"Well," Oliver said as his bow just folded itself up while he held it. No doubt about it, he's Batman. "That answers that question. These groups are all connected."

Sam leaned his shotgun against his shoulder as he looked at the still smoking corpses of pinstripe guy and his buddy. I felt like I had no idea who I was looking at anymore, all hint of his usual compassion or empathy was gone. "Cower in the dark spaces, really? The dark spaces are where we hunt you assholes down." He looked at the rest of us. "Montana?"

He and I were having a long talk on the way home. "Let's try to confirm that first. I don't want to be three states away from where we need to be. Bunker first."

"Fine." He didn't say another word as he stalked towards the door. Oliver followed but I stopped Roy, "Has he been like before?"

Roy's jaw was tight as he watched Sam walk away. "No. Never seen that side of him. I thought you were the one we'd have to worry about."

"Me too. Thanks."

He nodded and headed out. I looked at Coyote, "You..." She suddenly swayed and leaned against a stack of boxes, "Hey! Honey? You okay?"

Her eyes were closed tight and she was pressing her hand against her forehead, "God it hurts."

"What?" I set my gun down and wrapped my arms around her waist. "Talk to me."

"Opening myself up to see them, I had to keep scanning everyone to see who was what...I...I." Her knees buckled.

"Sam!"

All three of them came running back. "What's wrong?" And just like that old Sam was back. He was right there, hand on my shoulder, face filled with concern. I remembered all the times I switched back and forth between all my sides over the years, no wonder it used to piss him the hell off.

"Not sure. Grab the shotgun. Something to do with her scanning for monsters. I'll carry her, get the back door open."

Roy and Oliver followed us, I slid her into the backseat. "Honey, you still with us?"

She barely nodded, "Just need rest, focus, aspirin."

"Got it. Oliver, tail us, make sure no one's on our ass. We'll hit the hotel, grab our shit, get some aspirins in her and head home."

"On it." He and Roy faded into the shadows, a minute or two later they pulled up behind us.

I tossed Sam the keys. "You drive, I'm sitting in the back."

He didn't say a word. I gently lifted her head, slid in, set her head on my lap and closed the door as softly as I could. As we pulled away I covered her eyes with my hands and tried to figure out what the hell was up with Sam.


	17. Multi Front Fights

I figured launching into an in depth conversation with Sam while Coyote wasn't feeling too hot wouldn't be the best idea so I put it on hold for now. Her left hand had wrapped around mine, it felt clammy and she had tucked her head into my stomach to try to block out more light. More things I wished I'd asked before letting her do something like this. I shifted my coat so it tented over her head, tried to focus on what we'd found out and what we should do next. This whole mass campaign thing wasn't really something I had a lot of practice in. I also kept my eyes on Sam, he seemed normal, at least normal for the situation. He kept checking for people following us and glanced back at us once or twice, but didn't say anything.

Facts were, we didn't know all that much more, we'd just confirmed suspicions, which I guess is something but still didn't give me a direction. Montana didn't sound right to me. Why the hell would Gordon have gone there? He knew killing Shayna would get us moving. Did the monsters really think we were that stupid or impulsive? That we'd tear off to parts unknown based on their word? Gordon sure as hell knew otherwise. I tried looking at things from their point of view, we'd usually show up out of nowhere, go in guns blazing, kill them and leave by the next day. Gordon knew everything that was involved in hunting but what if he wasn't running things? What if he was just taking advantage of the situation or whoever was running it was using him as bait for us? It'd become pretty clear that the end goal was to take out all hunters. The quickest way to pull hunters out of the woodwork was make a big ass scene, which they'd just done. Maybe monsters really did just think that we were idiots, reacting and not actually taking the initiative on anything. Technically that's what we did, react to what they had done. What they didn't know was how much work went into prepping ourselves to take them out. Pinstripe and his buddy hadn't seemed all that impressed by Gordon either, which could mean he was just a cog in the machine, or they were being dicks because he'd been a hunter first. Course, they could just hate him.

We pulled up to the motel, parked in front of the room and Roy parked next to us. "Hon? We're here." I told Coyote, she nodded and lifted up just enough so I could open the door and slide out. She got up, but she was moving slow, way too slow for my liking.

"No one was behind us," Oliver rolled down his window and looked up at us. "You two watch her, Felicity said our tagged friend has camped out somewhere. Roy's going to take me back. We'll keep an eye on him. When you decide to leave let us know. Roy will follow behind you until your outside city limits to make sure no one picks up your trail, then double back and we'll go from there. Sound good?"

"Yeah, thanks."

"Sure."

Roy was backing out while Oliver's window was still rolling up, solid as hell, both of them. Coyote got her arm around me, Sam got the door and I helped her get to the nearest bed. I hadn't even finished helping her lie down when Sam appeared on the other side of the bed, three aspirins in the palm of right hand and a glass of water in his left. "Here."

"Thanks Sam," she mumbled as she took the aspirins and laid back down. "I'll be fine, just need a bit of time to recover."

I kissed her forehead, "All right. Sam and I need to talk though but we'll be right outside."

"Okay." She rolled onto her side and curled up.

I jerked my head towards the door, he frowned but walked out. I followed him and made sure to shut the door as quietly as I could. "First things first, when did you become the cold as ice guy?" I started out, "I mean, I get the threats to Crowley you told me about, but what the hell side of you did I just see?"

I had no idea why but that seemed to piss him off a lot more than it should, he actually leaned forward and got in my face before answering, "What? Are you the only one of us allowed to threaten monsters?"

I took a long look at him before I answered that question. Sam's not the person to get in someone's face, no matter how hard you push him. I'd seen him in plenty of fights and tight spaces over the years, he's always been the calm one trying to get people to talk things out. Not that he can't kick some serious ass, but he usually doesn't have a temper when he's doing it. It wasn't anger pushing him though, it was something a lot deeper than that. I'd heard about how he'd been when I was a demon and was trying to find me, but I hadn't seen it. He'd got in my face trying to keep me from killing people when I had the Mark, but it hadn't been intense like this. He'd been protecting me from myself, the source of my issues hadn't been something tangible, this threat was. It was tangible, new and taking out people he knew a lot better than I did. He viewed them as extended family after working with them this past year, which meant he'd go to Hell and back for them. I hadn't put that together until right now. I had to handle this right, "No, I'm not. Never said that. What I am saying is you're towering over me like you're about ready to throw punches and that won't bring Matt's family back. Maybe I'm not the one that Coyote should be worried about here." His nostrils flared as he stared me down for another second or two. "Look at yourself." I pointed toward the window, the way the light was hitting it we could see our reflections. His eyes shifted right. He froze for a second as he saw how wound up he was and that he was less than four inches away from me.

"Sorry," he mumbled as he stepped back, opened and closed his fists once or twice and relaxed.

"No problem, I get it."

A frown twisted his lips up, "Guess shoe's on the other foot this time. I'm the one feeling responsible for everyone."

"Sucks doesn't it?"

"Yeah." He pushed the hair out of his face and the intensity faded from his body, not his eyes though. "Okay, next move."

"You think Montana is legit?"

His forehead scrunched up as he stared off into space, "Maybe. I mean, if he flew there, but then he'd have to leave that blade behind. Unless he knows someone that has a small plane or something."

"I think we can rule out Gordon running things, at least by himself. The vamps didn't act like the Alphas didn't exist, just that they'd never met them."

"Good point. I think we'd be better off heading home and seeing what pops up. I agree with Dig that we're better off not being out on the road right now. At least until we know where we should actually be heading. Especially if we want to keep Oliver's crew off the radar. The more fights we get in, the higher the chance they'll get spotted." He tilted his head a bit as he waved his hand at the door to the room, "And if spotting the bad guys wrecks her this badly we should come up with other options, even though she'll probably fight us on them."

"She might not," I said, "She knows we can't afford for her to be wiped out when things heat up. We'll figure something out."

"Okay."

My phone rang, "Well, maybe this will help. Hey Dig."

"These guys are heading your way. You may want to pull up stakes and get underground. One of the cars stopped for gas, Cas stayed in the car with the windows up as I did a bit of eavesdropping. Their door was open while they gassed up, from what I heard the orders are to capture you guys, like now, especially since you have new toys. I managed to tag the car before they took off so Felicity's tracking them."

"Well, isn't that interesting. Thanks for the heads up. We'll get back to you."

"Sure thing."

He hung up, "Dig's party pals are heading this way. Guess the new shells made an impression, we've just rocketed to the top of the monster to do list."

Hatred flared in Sam's eyes, but he reined it in, "Weren't we there already?"

"Maybe I should have said we've been underlined, in red."

"We staging up here then?"

He really wasn't thinking things all the way through, "You want to have this fight in the middle of a city full of people? I doubt that's the only group heading this way." A few teenagers walked by, laughing and talking on their phones. He watched them as they passed us, that seemed to get his head back on straight. When he looked back at me he was a lot more rational.

"No, no I don't."

"Felicity's tracking them. Let's meet them somewhere on the road, preferably out in the middle of nowhere. They won't be expecting that. Have Gerald and the rest meet us. We'll lay waste that whole group, maybe get the ones in charge stirred up enough they come for us themselves." He didn't even have to say anything. I wouldn't say it was a full on bloodthirsty look, it was more along the lines of a "I'll bring them to justice," vibe that poured from him. "You call Oliver, see if he's got anything on our runner, fill him in, see what he thinks. I'll check on Coyote. Get a hold of Felicity and verify she's got eyes on Dig's guys. Then touch base with Dig and Gerald. Okay?"

"All right."

I needed to keep him busy, I know all too well what happens when some idiot decides to threaten people we care for. Hell, I'd taken out three guys for just talking shit about Coyote, that was nowhere near as serious as what was going on now. Looks like I was going to have to keep Sam on an even keel this time, instead of the other way around. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and started scrolling on his screen, I went back inside.

Coyote wasn't curled up in the fetal position anymore, I took that as a good sign. She'd propped her back up on the wall with a pillow so she was upright even if her eyes were still closed. I waited a minute before I said anything, I wasn't sure if she was meditating or just in pain.

"How's Sam?" Her words were drawn out and I got the feeling she wasn't all here. She must have sensed me or heard the door but hadn't come all the way back from wherever her mind was.

"Kind of complicated. I'll wait until you're done."

Her head dipped down then back up and she took several deep breaths, which I didn't mind watching. Deep breaths make for entertaining views, especially since her shirt was sitting lower than usual. I sat on the other bed and watched her breathe. After another minute or two her eyelids fluttered and the lines of her face became more defined, less relaxed. She slowly opened her eyes and turned her head to look at me. Just for fun, I lowered my gaze so it'd be fairly obvious as to what had my full attention.

"Men and mammary glands," she said, "Never ceases to amaze me how something designed for feeding infants can send full grown men right back to puberty." Her eyes were all the way open, left eyebrow arched and there was a rather large amount of joking exasperation on her face.

I shrugged, "What can I say? Boobs rock, especially yours." I tossed in an extra leer which got her to smile. "Feeling better?"

"Yeah, thanks. What'd I miss?"

"Tell me what you think," I filled her in. Her smile left as quick as it'd come as I told her all the details.

When I finished she nodded, thought it all over for a second, then started talking, "First, I like the idea of meeting them halfway, will really throw them off. Second, Sam. We both should have thought about how close to these hunters he's become. It makes sense, they look up to him, he knows that. You've been out of the scene for a year, Roy wouldn't be able to fill that gap by himself. He has his own life with Thea and helping Oliver. Sam's visited us a lot, sure, but he's still had plenty of time by himself at the Bunker. With everything he's put into organizing the hunters, it makes perfect sense he's gotten protective of them. No one does protective quite like the Winchesters do."

I couldn't really argue with that, "All valid points. How about you? Not sure having you scan for bad guys is such a great idea. We can use Cas for that once he and Dig hook back up with us."

She didn't like it, but she knew I had a point, "I can do it, but I can't do it for long periods. It's just too much input. I'm not used to it. If we get someplace and you need me to do a quick check, that I can do. Scanning a whole city as I drive through it, not so much."

"All right, we'll work around that then. No worries."

Sam knocked on the door, "Is it okay if I come in?"

"Yeah, we're not having sex." I replied.

"Not yet anyway," Coyote added.

Sam opened the door, "Yes would have worked you know."

I just shrugged, "So what's up?"

He pointedly looked away from me and talked to Coyote instead, "Oliver said his guy ended up in a hotel, was talking on the phone the whole way there though. From what he managed to pick up the guy was told by someone to call in the cavalry. Oliver wasn't sure how many people that meant but the guy made a lot of calls. I told him about our idea to meet Dig's group on the road and wipe them out, he agreed. He and Roy are heading back this way. Dig's going to stay trailing that group just in case they meet more people along the way or change directions. I told Gerald to stay sharp because we'll be calling him with a place to meet. Felicity is plotting where the best place is for us to meet up with them. Not sure how we're going to do that if they're on the freeway though, we can't exactly run them off the road."

"We won't have to," I said, "We pull in front of them, get their attention and lead them somewhere."

Coyote grinned, "Been years since I've been in a good car chase. Sounds fun."

Sam didn't grin, "Perfect, that's how they tried to take out Gerald. I'm in."

I heard Oliver pull up, he and Roy knocked, "Yeah it's open," I told them.

"So, plan?" Roy asked.

"Keep it simple," I answered, "We go where Felicity tells us, pull in front of their little caravan, get their attention, get them somewhere quiet and take them out. We can run them straight down the middle of a road where Gerald and the rest are waiting, shotguns locked and loaded."

"Brutal and efficient. It'll work," Oliver said, "Then what?"

"Then we use one of their phones to show their buddies what happened," Sam replied, his voice cold, "Grab one, find out who they're talking to and send them some photos of what's left. Their bosses will come after us or they'll give up on this whole scheme. Either way, we get what we want."

Oliver and Roy stared at him for a second but neither of them said a word.

"Everyone still in?" Sam asked.

"They're threatening hunters," Oliver matched Sam's tone, the room was getting downright frigid, "Roy's family, so are all of you, therefore a threat to any of you is the same as a threat to me. Things that threaten me or my family tend to have short lifespans."

Sam nodded, "Good." His phone buzzed, he looked at the screen. "Felicity has an area that will work. She's texting it to Dig. I'll send it Gerald. Let's go."

Something stirred deep down inside me and a chill ran up my spine. That clock in my head that was counting down to the next horrific thing felt like it'd just skipped ahead a few hours. Shit.


	18. Baby, Bullets and Badass Moves

We packed what little shit we'd unpacked, loaded up and took off. "Call Dig, conference in Felicity and Oliver." I said once we were about twenty minutes out. Coyote was riding in the back of Baby, Roy and Oliver were following and Dig was still following our new friends. Sam got all of them on the phone.

"Felicity, any chance you can eye in the sky on where you're sending us and give us an idea of what type of terrain we're looking at?" I asked.

"Already did," she replied, "It's a side road, not very well traveled, two lanes, goes through a pretty dense forested area. There's a large curve that Gerald and the rest can wait on the other side of so the monsters won't see him until they are right on top of him."

That was impressive and kind of scary. "Wow, nice spot. Didn't know Google Earth covered all that rural territory in Oklahoma."

"It doesn't."

"Uh, oh." I loved how she talked about hacking into government or privately owned satellites like Sam and I talked about breaking into a house, like it was no big deal. You know, just a normal day at the office. "All right then. Dig? What are we looking at car wise?"

"Four, two newer Impalas and two Elantras. So far they're still keeping en route to our rendezvous spot."

"Felicity, is there an alternate route Oliver can take that gets him there before Gerald does? I'd like to get he and Roy set up as back up so they don't spot him."

He can head straight there while you meet up with the bad guys. Give me Gerald's phone number and I can track it, see which way he's taking. That way I can route Oliver better."

"213-445-7652," Sam rattled off.

"Got it," she said. We heard keys clicking, then a few seconds later, "I see him. Hold on." A few more clicks, "Got a route. Oliver? I'll send it to your phone."

"Thanks," Oliver replied.

"Okay, just to make sure everyone's on the same page," I was saying this as much for me as for them. There were a hell of a lot more moving parts going on than I was used to dealing with, "As things stand now, Sam and I are getting in front of these assholes, showing them Baby's hot ass and getting them to chase us. Gerald and his crew will be there with shotguns loaded. Oliver and Roy, I want you to hold back unless things go sideways. Hang out in the woods. You're our trump card, same with Dig and Cas. Dig, once they're on me, pull back from the chase. Get a few miles behind them, Oliver will tell you if we need you. In theory, Gerald and friends should be able to take most of the vamps out on the first pass. The werewolves will be trickier since the shells are useless. Sam and I will try to take them down as soon as they get out. They should be easy to tell a part, they won't react if they get hit with the shells. Gerald was told to stick with the shotguns until all the vamps are down. They should should have enough shells left, we still have some too. Once all the bad guys are down, we're grabbing all their damn phones and having Felicity hack them. That should tell us everything we need to know. Any questions?"

"Dean," Roy spoke up, "Oliver and I grabbed some of that vamp killing crap, we can dip arrowheads in it if need be. Sorry, forgot to mention that earlier."

"Good thinking. Keep it handy. We don't know if this is the only group showing up to the dance. Anything else?"

"I still think I should be there helping you," Cas said. "They can't hurt or turn me."

He had a point but there was more at play here then he knew, we hadn't really had a chance to explain it to him. Well, we had time now. "Cas, remember how we acted when you first showed up?"

"Yes."

"All right, now take that and times it by about ten. We just confirmed the existence of Purgatory for these guys, having an angel showing up right in the middle of a battle with vamps will confuse the hell out of them. A few of them haven't even seen a demon up close. We're walking a fine enough line as it is letting them know that we started the Apocalypse. We don't need to give them more reason to have issues with Sam and I."

"I would think seeing an angel helping them, perhaps even healing their wounds would positively influence their opinions about you, not make them distrust you even more," he said.

"Cas," Sam jumped in, "It may do that in the end, but you don't kill things the way they're used to seeing. Hunters can adapt to a lot of things but a man killing something just by touching it's head, not to mention the light pouring from them and their eyes burning out of their heads before they die would be a distraction right now. Not a help. They'd more than likely start shooting at you instead of the vampires. We really don't have the time right now to explain what you are and why we know you. If you have to jump in and save our asses we'll deal with it then."

"Then there would be the whole question as to why, if we've known you for years, we haven't had you helping hunters this whole time." I added.

"I see," Cas replied, "I shall wait to assist you then."

"Thanks," I said, "Anyone else?" No one spoke up. "All right, see you all in an hour or so. Let's all hope that nothing us changes between now and then."

Everyone hung up. "Sam? You're sure Gerald's on the same page here?"

"Yeah. You want to call and check with him again though?"

"No. He's going to have a shit ton of questions when we're done with this, they all are. Like how the hell we know where to meet these vamps. Why haven't you clued them into Felicity?"

I glanced into the rear view mirror, Coyote looked fine but her eyes were on focused on Sam. She'd been probably wondering that too.

Sam kept his eyes facing front, "Because they didn't need to know. I haven't told them about the Bunker either."

"Well, that makes sense, but she's.."

"She's taking enough risks working with Oliver as it is," he interrupted, "They don't need to know her name or what she does. She works her ass off already. If hunters knew what she could do they'd be bombarding her with requests for help and she'd do it, she'd stop sleeping and would probably eat less than she does now. No, they don't need access to her." There wasn't an inch of give in his voice, not one inch. It was also pretty damn obvious that that wasn't the only reason he didn't want hunters to know. He was scared shitless that something else might find out who she was and take her out. I couldn't really blame him but all of this was going to make it damn difficult for these other guys to trust him again. He might end up being on his own with Roy and the last year's worth of work going down the tubes. Course, no one could have seen this coming.

"If I have to," he continued, "I'll tell them I hacked into the satellites. They already think I'm some sort of superhacker as it is. We have bigger things to worry about anyway."

"Right, first things first I guess. Kill bad guys, deal with fallout afterwards."

"I just hope we have enough shells," Coyote, ever the practical one, said.

"Cheery thought, thanks darlin'."

I looked in the rear view and saw a grim smile on her face, "Just pointing out the important things."

The rest of the hour or so drive was pretty damn quiet. Sam's phone rang, "Felicity," he said before he answered. "Status? You're on speaker," He asked as he put her on speaker phone.

"Dean, next off ramp, get off and double back," She ordered, not a hint of panic or worry in her voice. "They'll be right in front of you. As soon as you get behind them Dig is fading back. Oliver and Roy are there already, confirmed the location is clear. I'm taking you a slightly longer way, Gerald will be there in thirty minutes. You should call him to confirm, just to keep the act up. If something happens before you get to Gerald, Dig will back you up."

"All right, here we go." I said,"Everyone strapped in and ready?" Sam and Coyote both nodded. "Thanks Felicity, couldn't have done this without you."

"You're welcome." That's when her sense of calm slipped, "Don't get killed."

"Not planning on it, we'll get Oliver back to you in one piece. My word."

"Not just worried about him," she replied. "All of you, one piece. Understood?"

"I never argue with a woman who can hack satellites," I told her, "You may just drop one on me somehow."

"I can do that, just so you know."

"Coyote?" I said, "Think we may just be moving back into the Bunker now."

"Won't save you," Felicity chose to add, "The speed a satellite falls, think crater."

Well that was comforting.

"Standing by to guide you," she said.

I got off the freeway, double backed and got back on the freeway just as Dig's rental drove by, damn she's good. Dig had texted us descriptions for all the cars he'd been following but they weren't too hard to spot. They were in a line, flying down the carpool lane. Fortunately traffic was light, I pushed the accelerator down and pulled up next to them.

"Vamps." Coyote confirmed. "And shutting those perceptions back down."

"Let's knock, shall we." Sam handed me a shotgun, the passenger on the car I was keeping pace with picked just that moment to turn his head. He had long brown hair tied back into a pony tail, his eyes went wide with surprise which turned to hate pretty damn fast. Then he flashed his fangs at me. I decided to not shoot the window out, too many people around so I went with being a jackass. I winked, waved the shotgun at him and gunned the engine.

"Go!" I told Felicity.

"Two miles down, Madison off ramp," she instantly replied, "Get off turn right. Don't worry about the light."

"On it." I darted around three cars, cut in front of a fourth and made it to the far right lane. The monsters had slammed on their brakes and pulled off some damn slick driving to follow me. They were driving higher end Mazdas, which meant the handled a lot better than Baby. I really, really needed to upgrade her suspension.

"Felicity. Rough idea of the road between here and there," I said as I banked tight right, barely making the turn off the ramp to the surface street. The stoplight had been green. Coincidence? Probably not.

"Straight, two slight turns, you should be able to get some ground on them. Dig told me the make and models they're driving, you have higher top end speed. I suggest you use it."

"Yes ma'am," I shot back and floored it. I just hoped to hell no cops or cross traffic popped up.

"Go fifteen miles," she continued, "Turn right at Samson road. It dead ends after three miles. Oliver's in the woods, Gerald will be waiting."

I took a quick look behind me, "Got it." I'd gained some ground on them but I knew I'd lose it on the turns. "One of you guys need to give them something to think about."

"Sounds like fun," Coyote answered with a huge ass grin on her face. She'd always been a bit of adrenaline junkie back when we hunted, course, I'd been one too. She pulled out her .45, leaned out the window and hit the lead car's windshield twice. The car swerved, vamp or not you get hit with a .45 bullet you jerk a bit and at that speed, a bit was all it took to lose control. The car behind that one dodged around it, far too easily for my liking. The remaining two slowed down to clear it. None of them wrecked though, damn it.

"Keep it up. Wait, those aren't silver bullets are they?"

She shot me a scowl, "Seriously? Do I look like a newbie to you?"

"Right, dumb question."

"Damn straight," she muttered the started shooting again.

Sam joined in but after the second round of shots the vamps just ignored the hits and kept on coming. We couldn't take out engines or tires because we had to get them to Gerald to finish them off. Thankfully they didn't seem to have guns.

"Dean," Coyote said, "They seem to be talking on their cells, one of them cleared away the broken windshield."

"Not good." The only reason you talk on a phone in the middle of a chase is if you're coordinating something.

"Two miles." Felicity's voice cracked like a whip.

I had to time this right. Two miles goes quick when you're pushing close to top speed with a 350 engine, "Hold the hell on." I warned them about thirty seconds before I locked the brakes up and threw her into as deep a slide as I could without rolling her. I know Baby like the back of my own hand. I know how her tires grip, exactly when she'll start to break loose and just how far I can push her. Baby didn't fail me, she never had and she never would. She let me guide her right down the center of that turn like it was day in the park for her, not the last minute 90 degree drift I had to pull off. As I straightened her out again I risked a look in the mirror, that's when I finally gave into my inner adrenaline junkie. "Fuckers! Vamp reactions ain't got shit on Baby and I! Take that assholes!"

Sam and Coyote jerked their heads around, Sam actually started screaming, "Hell fuckin' yeah! Go Dean, Go!"

And Coyote, well, if we weren't being chased by vamps and Sam hadn't been with us, I would have been hopping over the front seat and throwing clothes off. She was loving it. I'd seen her love a lot of things I'd done over the last year, and, judging by the look on her face, this was ranking in her top ten. Which was giving me some ideas that I really didn't need to be focusing on at the moment.

Two cars had completely missed the turn, one had sideswiped a tree and the last one was dodging around the others and trying to catch back up. Yeah, good luck with that shit. We blasted down the last stretch of road, I spotted the other hunters lined up along the street. They were using their cars for cover, which was a pretty smart idea. We rocketed by, I slammed on the brakes again and the three of us bolted out of the doors just as the roar of a shit ton of shotguns being fired ripped the air to shreds.

Hunters, in general, are better than average shots and none of them were aiming for the body of the cars, they aimed for windows. I hadn't heard that much glass shatter in a long, long time. They'd waited till the other two cars had gotten caught up with the one that hadn't lost it on the turn and went to town. If I didn't know better I'd say the shotguns were on full auto with as fast as they fired. That's what it sounded like anyway. Sam, Coyote and I joined in just as the first car lost control and slammed into Susan's car. Susan and Teresa jumped out of the way just as her car got shoved back a few feet.

We made it through the first ten seconds, then the screams started, and it was beyond deafening. Sam said he had warned them about the vamps reactions to the stuff but there was no real way to prepare any of us for the intensity of it. One screaming had made me think my eardrums were going to rupture, five or six vamps going off all at the same time had me fearing for my brain. I was pretty damn sure it was going to explode out of my head.

The firing slowed down as we all tried to fight through the pain. I managed to keep my eyes open enough to see two guys get out of the shattered remains of the three cars in front of us as the car that had sideswiped the tree started coming towards us. Those two had to be werewolves given the fact that they were pulling nails out of their arms, not convulsing on the ground and smoking like the rest of them were. They growled, leapt over Gerald's hood and went straight for him and Rick.

"Traitor!" One of them shouted as his claws took Rick in the chest. Rick rolled with it, changed into wolf mode mid roll, and went to town on the guy's face and neck as they landed on the ground.

Gerald dropped his shotgun while lunging back and drawing his gun. The werewolf dodged as Gerald fired, the bullet missed, the werewolf didn't and his claws raked along Gerald's right arm, making him lose the gun.

"No!" Rick screamed. Sam and I switched the shotguns to our off hands, yanked out our guns and were about ready to light the wolf up when Rick broke the neck of the wolf on top of him, shoved him off and barreled into the one attacking Rick.

The last car pulled up, the hunters had gotten distracted by the werewolf battle. "Shotguns now!" Coyote ordered, then started firing again.

Sam and I bolted towards the wolf battle in case Rick didn't come out on top. Sam got to Gerald right before I did and pulled him out of the line of fire. "Stay down!" He ordered as he shoved Gerald closer to the trees.

Rick and the other wolf snarled and clawed at each other, blood flowing from at least a dozen claw marks along their backs and faces. The other wolf was a big guy with short black hair and a bunch of tribal tattoos going down both arms. He finally slipped Rick's hold, sat up and aimed his claws straight at Rick's heart. "Die like your hunter friends will." The guy snarled.

Rick's answer came in the form of a knife blade straight through the guys chest. "Not fucking likely." Rick apparently kept knives up his sleeve and the guy leaning back had given him just enough time to get one in his hand. The wolf stiffened and slumped over just as the last vampire stopped screaming. Rick got up and looked at me, "Gerald?"

"He's okay, back by the trees. Sam shoved him out of the way of any crossfire. Nice job."

He relaxed and the claws and fangs receded, "Just another day at the office." Then he spotted Gerald and went to check on him.

I took a look at the carnage, there were smoking bodies and trashed cars everywhere. I didn't see any more injured hunters but figured I'd check, "Everyone still in one piece?"

They all nodded, no one said anything though, they were too busy trying to process what was in front of us. If it hadn't been for the bullets, things would have been a hell of a lot more grim. That many monsters would have easily taken out at least half of us. I was two seconds away from telling people we should head out when I heard Sam, Coyote's and my phones all go off at once. Yeah, that couldn't be good.

I took mine out of my pocket, it was a text from Felicity. "Four more cars just headed your way. Just spotted them. Can't tell how many people. You have five minutes before they get there, they're moving fast."

Fuck! "Guys! How many rounds we have left?"

All eyes turned to me, "I think that was all of them." Teresa said. The rest nodded. Shit.


	19. Countdown

"Why?" Teresa asked.

"Incoming, that's why." I answered, which got a lot of blank looks.

Gerald appeared next to me, "How do you know?" His arm had been bandaged, probably by Rick.

"Explain later, no time. Four more cars coming and we're out of shells." I looked at Coyote and Sam, Sam nodded so did Coyote.

"They probably already know," Sam pointed out, "Put them in play."

"All right. I'll call the ones in the woods you take the others. If nothing else we need Gerald to be functional."

Susan and a few others frowned, "What the hell?"

Coyote stepped up, "Susan, trust them. We've got less than five minutes before we're under attack. You want to make it through? Just do what they tell you to. Please."

None of them looked too happy with that but they shut up, I called Oliver.

"Yes?"

"Please tell me you have things that can stop cars and fast."

"Of course."

He kind of sounded offended that I'd asked, "Good. Do it. Then do whatever you can to stop whatever comes out of the cars, or at least slow them down. We'll have to hand to hand it with the vamps, out of shells. We can't risk Coyote looking to see what's what, we'll get Cas to do it. He can at least give us an idea of numbers."

"Do you want Roy and I to close in and help once we exhaust what we can do from here?"

"If things aren't going our way, yes."

"Understood," He hung up.

Sam got off his phone just as Dig's car came straight at us, "Friendly!" He shouted so people wouldn't start shooting. Dig skidded to a stop on the side of the road, he and Cas got out. I almost didn't recognize Cas, I was so used to the trench-coat. He was wearing a blue short sleeved t-shirt, black jeans, boots and a baseball cap. "Everyone," Sam continued, "This is Dig and Castiel. You'll have more questions, just save them. Castiel is an angel, Dig's a friend. Yes, angels are real. Process that later. Gerald show Castiel your arm."

Gerald just shook his head and pulled the bandages off. Cas placed his hand over the wounds and did his thing. It's damn hard to get hunters to look dumbfounded, but that did it.

"Holy mother of..." Gerald started, then stopped mid sentence. "Oh, uh, sorry."

Cas grinned, "Gerald, I have known Dean and Sam for years, it takes quite a bit to offend me and blasphemy is hardly a ranking sin anymore."

Everyone else just stared, time to get them focused again, "All right, stare at the angel later. Dig, catch," I tossed him the keys to Baby, "Grab whatever you need out of the trunk."

"Got it." He grabbed the keys and jogged past me.

"Dig's human, ex Army, solid and worked with us before," Sam said, "We've got two people in the woods, one of them's Roy, the other is someone who doesn't like people knowing too much about him but he's a friend." He looked at me, "He have what we need?"

"Things that go boom? Yeah."

Sam nodded and kept talking, "More than likely the cars that are about to show up will have the engines explode for no apparent reason, don't worry about it. Focus on killing whatever comes out of those cars after the engines go up in smoke. I know we're throwing a lot at you but the rules have changed. We clear?"

Sherm threw his arms up, "Sure, I guess. Kill monsters, ignore angels, magically exploding engines and nets that appear out of thin air. Anything else we're supposed to not notice?"

Knew that net thing was going to come back around. "Nope, just make sure to notice the things trying to kill you."

He muttered something, grumbled then spat on the ground in front of him, "I'll keep my eyes open, thanks for the tip."

"Hey, I'm all about helping out my friends," I replied. "Cas, you need to tell us how many of what species we're dealing with. Take out what you can. For the rest of you, when Cas takes something out there's a pretty spectacular light show and their eyes tend to burn down to cinders. Try not to let it distract you."

"Why can't he just take them all out at once? You know, smite them or something? Wrath of God?" Rick asked.

"Good question, long answer," Sam said, "Short version, it doesn't work like that. He's an angel but instant mass disintegration is more along the lines of an archangel, which he's not. He'll give us an advantage though."

"I fucking hope so," Sarah said, "Here they come."

"What?" I turned so I could look up the road, that's when the windows rolled down on the lead car and guns got aimed towards us. "Fuck! Everyone down!"

We all dove, well all of us but Cas. Sam, Coyote and I all landed behind Baby at almost exactly the same time. "So not cool!" I snarled, "Who gave them guns?" Bullets slammed into Baby, "Mother fuckers!"

"Gordon!" Sam snapped, "He has to be with this batch."

I heard a high pitched beeping and risked a look over Baby's hood. The lead car's engine erupted into flames just as I did, I'll never make fun of Oliver's exploding arrows again. Damn. A half second later the last car suffered the same fate. If normal people had been in the cars we would have been counting bodies at that point, but monsters don't go down that easy. Since both cars were filled with monsters, the doors flew open, literally, and landed about four feet away from the cars. As soon as the doors hit the ground, monsters came tumbling out of the cars, a lot of them.

The two remaining cars got hit by exploding arrows, then Cas's voice echoed through the air. "All of you, close your eyes!"

"Do it!" I yelled and hoped Oliver and Roy had heard as I ducked back down and threw my hands over my eyes. It was still barely enough, near blinding light pressed against my eyes while various screams erupted from behind us. The light faded a few seconds later.

I heard gunfire,"Cas?" Since the light was gone we peeked out, Cas had just taken out three of them, the rest had blindly scattered like roaches.

"They are blinded for now. It won't last." Cas explained

Gordon had appeared from somewhere. He was standing next to the lead car, he had a piece of paper in his left hand and his right hand was sliced open. "Bye angel," he said as he slammed his hand onto the paper.

Cas lunged towards him but it was too late, "No!"

"Don't look!" I shouted as Cas started to glow.

"Dean!" Cas yelled, "Four werewolves, the rest..." Light surrounded Cas and exploded out from him before he could finish.

"Fuck you Gordon!" Sam screamed.

"Did he just kill an angel?" Gerald asked.

"Nope," Gordon said with a nasty smirk on his face, "Banished him. By the time he gets back though, all you assholes will be dead. Get them!"

Fortunately, most of Gordon's guys were still trying to see so couldn't do much yet. I wasn't sure why they still had their eyes but didn't have time to wory about that. Us hunters however could see just fine. Cas had taken out three, I counted ten more. An arrow hit one, it started convulsing, that left nine more.

"Go!" Sam yelled. All the hunters moved as one, Sam and I headed straight for Gordon, he dropped his paper and thankfully pulled out blades, not guns. Baby's trunk was still open so I grabbed the Purgatory Blade as I ran past and Sam yanked out his machete.

"C'mon Winchesters!" Gordon taunted, "Been waiting years for this." He ducked out of the way of an arrow which landed in the side of the car. "Gotta do better than that!"

Sam was on my left, he sped up, got ahead of me then did something I'd never, ever seen him do. He launched himself into the air and did a flying spinning back kick which connected solidly with Gordon's head, slamming him full force into the side of the car. Sam landed and swung his machete straight across, trying to take Gordon out in one hit. He almost did it, Gordon just barely ducked and Sam's blade took off a chunk of his scalp.

Apparently Sam had decided to take full advantage of hanging out with Oliver and Roy over the last year, Jesus Christ!

Gordon recovered and aimed one of his blades straight for Sam's stomach. Sam brought his blade down to block but got knocked back just by Gordon's sheer strength. Gordon was about to bring his Purgatory blade into play when I got there and blocked it.

I slammed my off hand into his face, "You mother fucking son of a bitch!"

He grinned, blood covered his teeth and was trickling down the side of his mouth, "Hi Dean. Miss me?" His elbow took me square in the jaw, which hurt like hell and drove me back a few feet. Sam took another swing, Gordon shifted right, caught Sam's blade in an X using both of his and shoved it into the side of the car. Sam almost lost his grip on the blade as Gordon pulled the blades toward his chest. Sam went with the blades, took a step forward and nailed Gordon in the stomach with his knee.

Gordon grunted and Sam managed to twist his blade out from between Gordon's blades. Gordon lunged forward and aimed one of his blades straight at Sam's throat. Sam leaned away but Gordon drew blood low down on Sam's neck. Sam hissed and jumped back.

My world shifted. There were screams coming from all sides, I was surrounded by monsters, outnumbered and had to protect Sam, had to survive. Nothing else mattered.

"That's right Dean," Gordon said, showing his fangs, "Remember how it was down there? How it felt?"

I didn't answer, just shifted tactics, fuck taking his head. I was going to take him apart piece by piece. My arms moved, the obsidian glinted in the sun as I swept the blade high then switched my aim as he went to block and sliced clean through his forearm instead. His hand, his Purgatory blade and half of his forearm fell to the ground. He howled and reeled back.

"Heal from that bitch!" I growled as I pressed my advantage. Unfortunately vamps don't go into shock, he blocked my next attack and scrambled away. Sam threw another kick at him just as I lunged forward, Gordon had nowhere to really go. He had to choose, Sam's leg or my blade so he aimed for Sam's leg but Sam was way ahead of him. He pulled the kick, which meant Gordon had thrown all that power into thin air, when he didn't connect with anything solid he stumbled. Sam's machete dove towards Gordon's neck again, Gordon blocked again, his arm up high and wide open for me. Gordon knew it too. His eyes went wide just as my blade took that arm off at the shoulder.

He didn't even get a chance to scream, because Sam took Gordon's head before his arm hit the ground.

I didn't bother celebrating because I spotted Oliver running towards us, which meant things had gone to hell. I turned to look and the sounds of all the other battles going on hit me hard.

Star's blade took another head, then she screamed and dropped as a bullet took her knee out. Oliver leapt over her and fired, the arrow taking the guy that had fired at Star in the eye. Must have been a vamp because he started yelling and convulsing as he jerked the arrow out of his eye. Roy vaulted over another car, stabbed one guy with an arrow, then hurled one of his darts at the neck of a redhead monster chick who just lined up a shot on Coyote.

Both of those monsters flinched but didn't drop, werewolves then. I yanked out my gun and nailed both of them with silver bullets. That got their attention. Coyote didn't hesitate and drove one of her silver tipped blades through the heart of the redhead in front of her and rolled to the right just as another monster started firing at her.

Gerald nailed the guy Roy had stabbed with a silver bullet through the heart. I saw Susan laying on the ground, injured some way or other. Rick was going toe to toe with a vamp, neither of them had weapons that would hurt each other so they'd resorted to blades and claws. Sarah popped up from behind the hood of her car and fired at the legs of a tall brown haired dude in a long black trenchcoat. She took one of his knees out just as his gun jammed. I saw vamp fangs as he hissed."Sam! Vamp!"

Sam nodded and we headed into the fray. Sam's blade swept straight through trench coat dude's neck in one hit. Sam didn't even slow down. Rick had just been thrown by the vamp who's back happened to be towards me, my blade crunched through his spine without stopping. They'd all die, I'd take them all out.

"Dean! Down!" Gerald hollered.

I dropped and looked behind me, another monster with a gun had just lined up a shot on me. Gerald's shot took him in the head, he just smiled. I rolled up to my knee and was just about to hurl my blade at him when Coyote came out of nowhere, swinging her machete full force, his head flew off. She was bleeding from her shoulder, her face was bruised and she was limping. All that rage I'd kept at bay for over a year came flooding back.

Oliver took a bullet to his left arm, he didn't even seem to register the hit as he twisted to throw something at the monster that'd hit him. There were two left. One that had just shot at Oliver and the one was still fighting with Rick. I moved. The one that had shot Oliver saw me coming and started to turn to face me, he should have moved faster. I emptied the rest of my clip into his face, didn't kill him of course but it drove him backwards and into the side of a car. I separated his head from his neck before he had a chance to recover. I spun and was about ready to take out the vamp Rick was fighting with when I saw it's head go flying thanks to Dig.

"Any more of these bastards?" I snapped. There had to be more, more to kill. I needed to do more damage. A bone chilling howl came from behind me. "What the?"

We all looked up, there was something that looked like a wolf at the edge of the treeline.

"That's no wolf," Gerald said.

"No, no, no..." Rick started mumbling. "I can't...don't make me..." Then his words faded into pant laden growls.

Gerald backed away, "Rick?"

Rick's eyes turned yellow, his fangs and claws grew and all sense of humanity left him.

"Roy!" Oliver ordered.

Roy grabbed an arrow out of his quiver and fired it at Rick. Seeing as how Roy was standing about five feet away from Rick when the arrow hit and the net deployed Rick was swept off his feet and landed in a heap about three feet away from where'd he'd been standing. I was out of bullets but Sam wasn't, Rick was trying to shred the net when Sam nailed both of Rick's hands with silver bullets. Rick howled, literally.

I turned back around but the wolf was gone. Looked like Magnus's wolves were still alive and kicking, either that or we'd just seen an Alpha werewolf. An Alpha could have controlled Rick. I knew just how powerful an Alpha could be, seeing as how the Alpha vamp had been in my head for a bit way back when. I was starting to think Cas may have been right, the portal was still open. In which case we'd need Cas to talk to, oh no. Gordon had banished Cas and Cas wasn't allowed to be in Heaven anymore. Fuck! Gordon may have killed Cas after all.


	20. Discoveries

"Sam, check on Teresa and Star," I said. "Oliver? How's the arm?" I pushed aside what had just happened and the overwhelming urge to follow that damn wolf thing and take it out. People were hurt and who the hell knew if Cas was ever coming back.

"It went through the muscle, just need stitches," he replied.

"Coyote? You okay?"

She nodded, "Just a gash. Rolled my ankle, not bad, just hurts like hell."

"Anyone else hurt?"

Gerald looked around at everyone else shaking their heads, "Just some bumps and bruises. We got damn lucky they were crappy shots and Castiel managed to blind them for a few seconds. Nice job on Gordon you two."

Just hearing Gordon's name pushed me almost too far, I managed to shove it back down. "We need to torch all these bodies or they might just come back again."

"Answers best be coming damn soon Dean." Sarah said.

"Now?" Sam snapped, "Rick's fighting with his wolf side, Teresa and Star need an ER visit, we're surrounded by trashed cars and corpses and you want to talk about portals to other dimensions? Get your priorities straight! Gerald help me get them into your car. You hit up the nearest hospital. Dean, you, Dig and Roy start cleaning this up and keep an eye on Rick. Coyote, you and Arrow should get looked at too. The rest of you, get clear of this mess and holed up somewhere fast. Whatever that thing saw you can be damn sure it's relaying everything it saw to someone else. Hide. Now. Dean and I will get you all the answers you want later."

"I'll help with the clean up, this is just a scratch," Oliver replied.

Coyote leaned against Baby, "Yeah, same here. You guys take off."

I almost argued with her when Rick stopped growling and his eyes went back to normal. He tried to sit up while looking wildly around, "Oh God! Did I..." Fear and self-loathing crossed his face while he tried to figure out where he was.

"No, you didn't eat anyone," I answered. "Roy hit you with the net before you took two steps. Sorry about the hands, you were trying to claw your way out of the net. What happened?"

"I don't know," he said, "That wolf, it just got inside my head somehow and I felt it, like on the full moon. I...I'm sorry."

"Not your fault," Sam countered, "Teresa's hit pretty bad and Star's got a bullet in her leg. We're taking them to the ER, you want to go with or have someone here take those bullets out?"

He was pretty shaken up, I got the feeling he wanted to get as far away from here as possible, "I'll go with."

"All right. You sure you're over it?" I asked.

Rick nodded, "Yeah."

"Gerald? Let's do this."

Gerald and I shifted Teresa and Star to the back of his car, Sam helped untangle Rick from the net and he got into Gerald's front seat. The rest of them loaded up into their bullet ridden cars.

"I'll let you know how they are and tell you where we all hole up," Gerald said before he pulled out. "All things considered, glad you guys were with us on this."

"Thanks," I said as I backed away from his car. He drove off, the rest of them followed, leaving Oliver, Roy, Dig, Sam and Coyote and I there to deal with the aftermath. That's when the bottom fell out and I had to lean against Baby to wait for everything that had just happened to sink in. It looked like a slaughterhouse, blood and guts littered the ground around me, smoke was still rising from the cars that Oliver and Roy had taken out, I could still hear the screams echoing in my head. It was the worst combination of Purgatory and what I'd done and seen when I'd still had the Mark. I don't usually get queasy over shit like this but after a year of not being elbow deep in blood and hacking off heads I wasn't used to it anymore; wasn't used to that iron and bile scent of blood and internal organs spilling out onto the ground, the sight of empty eyes staring up at me from heads that were feet away from their bodies. Any of it. As hard as it was hitting me, Coyote was taking it even harder. She'd never been exposed to this level of violence, not first hand anyway. Her eyes swept back and forth across the carnage as she tried to keep her breakfast down and figure out where to start on cleaning this mess up.

I walked towards her, as much as I wanted to feel her in my arms it felt wrong to bring love into this scene. "Hey, sure you want to help out with this? We got it, really."

Our eyes met and I got to see her push her shock and horror away, "Yeah. I'll be fine. Let's just get it done. Are you all right?"

"Barely, if there'd been more of them I probably wouldn't be. At least Gordon's out of the picture now."

A phone started ringing, all of us looked around, "Not any of ours?" Sam asked.

"No." Dig replied, "It's coming from behind that car." He pointed to one of the cars that was still smoking. "We going to answer it?"

"May as well. Might learn something," Roy said then jogged over, disappeared behind the car and then we heard his voice, "Hello? No, hold on."

He came back around the car, the phone held away from his ear and a warning on his face, "She's asking for the Winchesters."

"Oh this just keeps getting better and better," I said, "I'll take it."

Roy handed me the phone.

"Yeah, this is Dean. Who the fuck are you?"

A sultry laugh came through the phone, "I see the reports of your temper are rather accurate. I'm pleased you and Sam survived, I've been waiting to meet you." Her voice was oddly accented, soft but there was a power to it that I couldn't place, for some reason I felt this compulsion to listen and not argue with anything she said. I fought it though, that's one thing I have a ton of practice doing, fighting compulsions.

"About that. I thought the idea was to capture us, not kill us. Plans change?"

I heard a low growl, "You brought new weapons into play and I misjudged certain degenerates. They chose to let fear rule them instead of strategy. Vampires have always been weak willed creatures. Killing you was never the plan, killing hunters however, well that's an entirely different story."

"Are you the one that screwed with Rick?"

"Technically yes."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"You'll have a chance to find out. Meet with me, you, Sam and the ones who are currently clustered around you trying to hear our conversation. They all intrigue me and it's been centuries since I've been intrigued."

Which meant she was watching us from somewhere close by. "Since you're so close by why don't you come join the party?"

Sam's eyes went wide, Oliver started scanning the trees, so did Coyote. Dig and Roy fanned out to either side to just in case something came at us.

"You have work to do and should probably rest up. I want you to be on the top of your game when we meet. Tomorrow, sunset. McClatchy Park. Go to the main entrance, there will be someone there to tell you where to go. They'll be an innocent, so try not to kill them. Save your strength for my pack and I. Enjoy your victory, for now. Oh and if the angel returns before then, leave him out of it. He'll just be banished again."

"How the hell..."

"Since you kindly removed Gordon from my to kill list I'll share this with you," she interrupted, "If you think your presence in Purgatory made waves, imagine what an angel's did. Then, dwell on the fact that the Leviathans and some others are older than many angels are. Do you honestly think no one there knew how to banish an angel? I know you have a rather low opinion of monsters, but that's because you've only dealt with bottom feeders, half breeds and the mutated, deformed versions of what we really are. Ponder that while you incinerate vampires. Until tomorrow."

She hung up and that clock in my head that had been counting down to a horrific event, well it stopped cold. That call was the set up for it.

"Well?" Sam asked.

"Tomorrow, sunset, bitch wants to meet with all of us. She's from Purgatory, probably an Alpha or something close to it, hedged around her being the one that screwed with Rick. You all decide what you're going to do. I'm going to set Gordon on fire."

I didn't want to talk about it, much less think about it. I tucked my gun back into my waistband, grabbed the salt and gas out of Baby's trunk and seconds later the acrid smell of soon to be crispy corpse filled my nose. "Fuck you bastard, stay the hell down there. I only wish I could gift wrap you for Crowley. Purgatory's too damn good for you." I dropped the match and watched his body shrivel up and turn into dust. There was no smell of burning flesh, guess vamps burn a lot faster than people. That'd be handy, we could clear out a lot faster. Once he was a pile of ash, I scattered it and walked to the next corpse.

Coyote limped up next to me, "Babe? Everyone's in."

A thought hit me and I turned around, "Dig, go home. You have a kid."

He straightened up and got pissed, "No. You need the help."

"Fuck that! Your loyalty needs to be to them, not to us. You want Sara to grow up without a Dad or even worse, if they turn you, you want to spend your life worried about ripping them to shreds?"

He took a step towards me, "Oliver and I had this out years ago Dean. I'm in."

"No!" I dropped the gas can and got in his face, "I don't need your blood on my hands."

"Guys!" Sam got in between us. "Hold up, Dig wait. Dean, calm the hell down." He dug the key for the Bunker out of his pocket. "Dig, listen to me. The knowledge in the Bunker, the hunters need it and I need to know that it will be passed on if something takes Dean and I out. Dean's right, you have a family but that's not all, none of the hunters know where the Bunker is, you do. Take this, guard it with your life and if we don't come back give it to Gerald and take him there. Please."

All Dig's anger just vanished, I cooled down too. Sam was right and Dig immediately understood. This was something that military people would do, the Bunker's a resource that was more important than us and soldiers understood the concept of protecting secrets and passing them to the right people.

Dig took the key, put it in his pocket and nodded. "You have my word. I'll make sure it gets to the right people."

"Thank you," Sam said.

"Just make damn sure that the only person I'm giving this to is you," Dig replied. "Let's clean this mess up and clear out."


	21. Recovery

It took about twenty minutes to set all the bodies on fire, the vamps lit up fast then burned down quick. The werewolves we ended up sticking into a car and setting it on fire to make sure nothing would be left. We grabbed all the cell phones to have Felicity go through them, then got into our cars and left. Fortunately none of the bullets that hit Baby hit anything important, we'd have to report Dig's rental stolen at some point because it had bullet holes in it, Oliver had hid their rental behind some trees so it was unscathed.

Sam, Coyote and I didn't talk as we made our way to the nearest hotel. I'd already decided that Coyote and I were getting a room, screw hiding the fact that we were together, I needed her and I could tell she needed me.

Gerald had called Sam and said Teresa and Star should pull through and they were scattered in groups of two or three between various hotels. Sam told him that we'd been contacted by who we thought were the monsters behind all of this and that if we didn't get in touch within forty eight hours that Dig would contact him. Gerald tried to argue about it but Sam shut him down by saying that we'd caused this mess, we'd clean it up and that they'd been pulled in far enough as it was. Gerald couldn't really argue that fact so let it go.

I also decided fuck cheap motels and pulled into a Sheraton. Oliver had decided to go get stitches since all his usual medical supplies were back at Starling, Coyote's gash was just a deep graze and Sam's cut wasn't that deep. Dig and Roy followed us to the same hotel and grabbed rooms for the three of them and I got two rooms right across the halls from each other for Sam and I. Coyote threw a different shirt on before we got out so no one would see blood, shifted her hair more to the front and put on sunglasses so it covered the bruise on her face. We ended up with first floor rooms that were fairly close to the lobby and she hid her limp well enough to not attract attention.

I opened the door for her and helped her to the bed. She sunk down onto the covers and smiled, "Almost as comfy as the one back home."

"That was the plan." I told her. The rooms had coffee pots in them so I filled a pot with water to heat up for tea. "Be back in a minute. Going to check on Sam."

She laid back and nodded. "I'm good for now."

I gave her a quick kiss and ducked across the hall. We'd given each other key cards for our rooms just in case. "Hey, you good?" I asked as I walked in.

"Yeah, going to clean up and dig through Magnus's stuff again. See if I can find anything else out about these things. Wish you'd gotten more info."

"Yeah, me too but she was calling the shots. Think Felicity will be able to figure anything out?"

"Not much gets past her, you know that. I'll start plugging phones into the laptop so she can hack them and upload the data. May not get anything before we're supposed to be there though."

"If it doesn't have to do with that bitch we're meeting, pass it on to Gerald. Let's just focus on what's in front of us, deal with the rest afterwards."

"Got it."

I turned to leave.

"Wait."

"Yeah?" I stopped and turned to face him again.

"Thanks for being okay with giving that key to Dig. I wasn't sure you'd go for it."

"You were right and it gave Dig a mission. Hunters can't afford to have that knowledge vanish again for who knows how long. I'm going back to my room, she needs me. Call if you need something or find anything out."

"Sure thing."

There was enough water heated up to make a cup of tea by the time I got back to our room. "What herbs do I need to use?" I asked.

She sat back up, "Hand me my bag, I'll get them."

"No, I said what ones do I need to use. You've got them labeled, I saw that back at the other hotel. Now which ones." I wasn't about to let her move around on that foot and I had to keep busy somehow, I didn't want to dwell on what could happen tomorrow.

I saw her start to get stubborn about it, Coyote's too much like me, we're not good with letting people help us out. Then it faded and she smiled, "All right. I actually have some pre-mixed anyway. Dig into the small purple pouch and pull out the one marked with a W and S, for wounds and swelling. There's a tea ball in the front pocket. Pour the herbs in the tea ball and let it steep for three minutes. If you want to make a compress for my ankle, look inside the yellow bag for the plastic bag marked sprains. I tried to plan for everything. The cloth for the compresses is in the same yellow bag. Just get it wet and put the herbs in it. I'll take my shoes off."

"Got it." I followed her instructions, got the compress around her ankle and a mug of tea into her hands after that. Once she was all settled in I kicked my shoes off, laid down next to her and grabbed the room service menu off the nightstand.

"Room service? Really?" She asked. "Not exactly standard hunter operating procedure."

"Neither is staying at a Sheraton, you didn't question that." I pointed out.

"Of course not. If I'm going to be bedridden, it's not going to be on some shitty ass cheap motel bed."

"Oh, I see, all about you then."

"Well, yeah." She laughed and leaned against my shoulder so she could see the menu. "That turkey guacamole sandwich looks good."

"Yeah, I'll go with the chicken ranch sandwich, with a bunch of sweet potato fries and some beers. Let me see what Sam wants." I called him.

"Hey, haven't found anything yet."

"That's not what I'm calling about. Ordering room service, grab your menu and tell me what you want."

A couple of seconds passed before he answered, "Room service?"

"Why is this such a complicated concept for people?" I answered. "Yes, room service. Now pick something."

It took him a minute, "The bacon ranch burger, mashed potatoes and get me a side salad."

"You and your rabbit food. No problem. When it gets here I want you to turn off the laptop, come over here and hang out. Maybe watch a movie or something."

Coyote just stared at me and I could picture the look on Sam's face.

"Uh what? Why? Felicity thinks she can track down where the calls were coming from, maybe we can hit them before tomorrow."

How to explain this. "Sam, listen. Let me tell you about the phone call. That wolf didn't just happen to be there, trust me. It had to be following those vamps somehow. Either that wolf or the chick I talk to managed to get inside Rick's head, and knew we were all standing there. Remember, the first batch of vamps thought Gordon was in Montana. She knew enough to call a cell phone that we were standing by, knew our names, knew about Cas and I being in Purgatory, straight up said that if Cas came with us he'd just get banished again. She called Gordon and the rest of the monsters we hunt bottom feeders, half breeds and fucked up versions of the real things. No way in hell we catch this chick off guard. She said she had a pack. Did you see how big that wolf was? Even if silver bullets work you know how much harder it will be to hit the heart if they're in that form, not human."

"Okay so?"

"So we've got a day and a half, I think we need to rest up, eat real fucking food, relax then hit it full force tomorrow. Tell Felicity to take a break too. Her computers can run all the searches on shit on their own. We just took out over twenty monsters, plus Gordon. Cas is who knows where, doing who knows what. Hell for all we know, Heaven's finest could be hunting him down. I don't intend to go into whatever this thing is tomorrow on shitty sleep and stressed out. Not with you and Coyote next to me, not anymore. Did that for too many damn years, made too many mistakes because of it. Downtime Sam, we need some."

As I'd explained things Coyote had grown more and more surprised at first, but by the end she was nodding along with what I was saying.

"You sure you two don't want to be alone?" Sam asked.

"She's drinking tea and got a compress on her ankle, we're both starving. It's family time, not crazy sex time."

"Uh..all right." I could tell he was still trying to process the whole idea of me not strong arming my way into the next fight. "Call me when the food gets there then."

"You bet." I hung up, then used the room phone to place our order, hung up with them then looked at Coyote. "Well?"

"You think this chick can get inside all the werewolves' minds?"

"Wouldn't be surprised. Could be how she knew where we were and what happened. The Alpha vamp had a psychic link to other vamps and we ran across an Alpha shifter who could feel his offspring too. If this is the Alpha wolf it would stand to reason that she has the same ability, plus wolves are pack animals to begin with." And with that another thought slammed into my head, "Shit! Rick! If she can get in his head she'll know where everyone is staying." I called Gerald.

"Dean?"

"Where's Rick?"

"In surgery."

"Do not, under any circumstances tell him where the others are and you may want to send him home. We think this Alpha wolf chick can get inside his head and dig around for things, like where everyone is."

"Goddamnit!" Gerald snarled.

"We've been tossing around ideas, I know from experience that other Alphas could do that. He should go see his family anyway, get them somewhere safe till we deal with this."

"What the hell happened to simple hunts?"

I had to laugh, it sounded pretty bitter though, "Welcome to Sam and mine's life for the last decade or so. Starting to understand why we play things close to the chest?"

"Yeah, all right. I'll get him on the road home once he can function. Teresa and Star are still under too. I'll call you when I know more. This thing you're heading into, sure you don't want extra hands?"

"I appreciate the offer but I'm backing Sam on this. This chick wants us, usually that means they want to try to convince us to join their side, we say no, then they try to kill us, shit hits the fan and hopefully we make it out in one piece. Sam and I have done this dance once or twice before. If you guys come she'll just take you out no questions asked. Trust me. Just stay put and wait for us to contact you."

"Remember when I said I wanted to know the full story about your past?" He asked.

"Yeah?"

"I'm starting to reconsider." There wasn't a single ounce of sarcasm in his voice, he was being dead serious.

"Don't blame you. Talk to you later."

"Yeah."

We hung up. I set my phone down, put my arm around Coyote and pulled her close. "Don't suppose I can convince you to stay here tomorrow because of your ankle?"

She put her empty mug down and gripped my hand tight, "No."

"Figured as much." If there was ever a situation where I wouldn't have minded Gabriel screwing with time, this was it. I'd be happy with an endless loop of Sam's birthday party that seemed like it happened a year ago, not a few days back. I didn't have that option though, so I made the best of what I had.

"I love you," I told her, then I ran my hand down her cheek and kissed her. People talk about timeless kisses, especially chick flicks, I always blew that off as a stupid movie thing, at least until she and I got together. We'd had several over the years, the one the night of the sweat ceremony ranks pretty high on that list. That one saved me in a lot of ways, our night in the Bunker when I'd finally admitted what I wanted was another one, but this one was in a whole other category. I'd used the last night on earth thing to get with a few chicks in the past, Anna, for example. Well, she'd used that on me, either way the outcome was usually the same. I'd drop my walls just enough to feel what I'd buried deep down, refused to let myself see as a possibility in my future and make a connection, even if it was fleeting, with someone else. When it was over I'd put the tough guy mask back on and go do some insane, world saving, life threatening thing and never see them again.

None of that applied this time, I'd given everything I had left to Coyote, there was no tough guy mask to put on anymore. Just me, the real me. If her and I survived this we'd be on a cruise ship celebrating something neither of us ever expected to have in our lives. An actual, honest to God, full blown, romantic relationship. That's why a goddamn volcano of emotions hit me as I tasted a bit of blood from a small cut on her lip. I could lose her tomorrow. Lose everything, and it scared the shit out of me because I knew, just knew, if I did there'd be no coming back for me. Not this time. There'd be no fucking point to any of it anymore. It'd rip Sam to shreds, I knew that and that had always made me hold on before, but this was one loss I wouldn't make it back from.

My heart started racing and I couldn't seem to get close enough to her. "I can't, I can't..." The words just came out, I didn't want them to, I just wasn't able to stop them.

She pulled back from me, took one look, put her hands on either side of my face and locked gazes with me, "Babe? Babe! It'll be fine. We'll make it through."

I could stare at her eyes for hours, "No, we won't, I should have never stayed, never let this happen." My chest was tight and an ice cold sweat broke out on my skin. What the hell was wrong with me?

"Dean, breathe."

For some reason seeing Lisa in the hospital room after I had Cas wipe my existence out of her mind came back to me. God how that hurt! Her and Ben staring blankly at me, after everything we'd shared. What if tomorrow night it was Coyote's empty eyes looking at me, not some monster? Just the thought of it tore me apart.

"Dean! This is not helping."

"I know...I ..." I couldn't stop the thoughts.

"Listen to me, I will not die, you will not die. I'm a Shaman remember? If something like that was going to happen I think I'd know. Will something fucked up happen tomorrow? Probably, but we are not going to die. I promise."

"What if they just aren't telling you?" I didn't want to believe it, I knew how this usually ended up.

"They told me that Badger was going to fight me all those years ago, that was hardly life or death. They told me about Leaping Deer, they've told me a lot of things over the years. If I was heading to my death, they'd probably mention that. I don't think I pissed them off by doing this instead of staying home. I know you don't have faith in your God but trust my guides. Please."

That made me feel a little bit better, her guides had helped us both out in the past. "Sorry, just..."

"I know." She kissed me again, I chose to lose myself in that instead of the fear. Once that kiss ended she ran her hand through my hair and smiled. "If you think I'm passing up an endless assortment of food, drinking expensive alcohol on the deck of a boat and some adventurous sex in public places, you don't know me all that well."

That successfully re-routed my thoughts to something a lot more interesting, "Sex in public places? Did I miss something here?"

"Ships have pools, you're on board for days at a time. Full moon? Late night adventures? Catch up here Babe."

"Oh..I, wow. I think I need to research this cruise thing more. A whole lot more."

She slid her hand down my chest, "Yes, I think you should."

I was just about to reply when there was a knock at the door, "Room service."

Talk about crappy ass timing.


	22. Gathering Strength

I laid there for a second, Coyote laughed and shoved me towards the edge of the bed. "Room service was your idea, not mine. Tough shit Babe."

"I get no damn sympathy, none."

She arched her back and licked her lips, "Nope. Go get the food, I'm wounded and hungry."

Talk about having to change gears. I rolled my way off the bed, got up and grabbed the food. I didn't bother calling Sam, just knocked on his door with my elbow since my hands were full. "Hey, food's here."

I heard a muffled "Okay" then the door opened. I looked over his shoulder and saw that the laptop was actually closed. Good. My panic attack about possibly losing Coyote must still have been showing on my face somehow because he paused before stepping out into the hall. "You all right?"

"Yeah. Let's eat."

He let me slide, shut his door and we went back to my room. I divvied up all the food and we settled down to eat. "So Sam, when did you become a ninja? That was a crazy ass flying kick man!"

"What?" Coyote asked, "I missed that."

In typical Sam fashion he seemed a bit shy about it and tried to shrug it off, "Just been learning some stuff from Oliver and Roy. When I stayed there all those years ago Oliver said that I'd be pretty devastating if I learned how to use my legs better. I've had the time over the last year so figured why not. It's not as hard as I thought it would be. I'm so used to flying through the air anyway thanks to all the crap we fight that I actually have pretty good air awareness, which, according to Oliver, is the hardest part to learn. The rest is just practice."

"You'll have to show Coyote sometime. He looked like Bruce Lee, seriously. Nailed Gordon straight in the face, landed and tried to one shot, one kill him. It was brutal."

"Dude, I'm not that good."

"Sam, someone as big as you are moving like that, it's damn impressive. I'm a little jealous."

That made him smile, "I can show you if you want."

"Me too," Coyote said, "I'd love to learn something new."

"Sure, next time I'm over at your guys' place I'll give you the basics."

"Good," Coyote replied, "That way next time Badger acts up I'll have a new way to humiliate him."

"Speaking of Badger," Sam said after he took another bite. "What was up with that whole fight anyway? You never really explained it. I thought all of that was said and done."

"It was, until I decided to step down as leader of the tribe," she explained.

Sam slowly set his beer back down on the table, "You what? Why?"

She told him the whole story, he didn't say anything until she finished. I think both of us were surprised at how pissed off he looked. "They seriously thought there was some weird threesome thing going on?"

"Probably not," she answered, "those two just hate me so will do or say anything they can think of to piss me off."

He shook his head, took another drink then got serious, "I know I'm not the expert here and I'm not trying to piss you off or tell you what to think, but, I think both you and Rising Dove, all respect to him, are wrong.

It took her a second before she said anything, "Why?"

"I see how much you care about those people, about bettering their lives. Maybe back in the old days, when everything wasn't so interconnected you'd have to choose one or the other, being in the "white man's world" or with your people, but it's different now. Yes, you love Dean, there's no denying that, and sure, he somehow makes you happy; not sure how, he's kind of a dick," he said with a huge smirk on his face.

Jackass. "Gee thanks."

The smirk disappeared again, "But you choosing to help him, help us, it's not some sort of sign that you don't care about them. What you can do, your abilities, yes they're rare but nothing says that you should only use them to help your people. That would be like saying you can't learn what you used at school or the money you make with your degree to build that truck stop. Those are skills too. How is it right to use what you learned when you left the tribe for them but not use what you were born with to help us?"

"I..." she didn't have a comeback for that, I didn't either, "..never looked at it that way."

He had a damn good point. She started chewing her bottom lip as she thought all of the ramifications of that over in her head. "Not sure they'd let me back on the council though after that whole scene," she said.

"Maybe not, but it sounded like you have more people with you than against you. I understand why Hunting Bat said what she did about not being able to say how the tribe would view you when you go back but, they didn't try to mob Dean after he destroyed three people. No one came for your guys' heads, think about it. I mean, most of them have helped with the truck stop, and they all seem excited about it. You're a good leader, I hear things when I go for my jogs around there at night. Don't be surprised that everyone still expects you to lead when you get back, official title or not."

A weight I hadn't really noticed seem to leave her, "Thanks Sam. We'll see what happens when we get back, but it's nice to hear an outsider perspective."

"No problem."

We finished up, watched some random shows on TV and relaxed for a few hours. Sam started to get restless and Coyote was fighting to keep her eyes open. Probably because I'd found the herbs labeled sleep and thrown some in her third cup of tea. She didn't seem to notice but I wasn't buying it, she probably just wanted to make me feel like I'd gotten away with something. Which was fine by me as long as she got some rest.

Sam got up, "I should probably check in with Felicity. This was a good idea Dean, thanks."

"I'll join you. I think Coyote's done for."

That's when she gave me a sly ass little grin, "Giving me a taste of my own medicine?"

"Yup. You need to sleep. I'll be back later."

"All right. Can you grab me my bag? Going to change and pass out."

Her ankle wasn't all that swollen, thankfully, so she really didn't need me to hover over her anymore. I gave her the bag, kissed her forehead, grabbed the room service tray and set it next to the door in the hall on the way to Sam's room. Room service kind of rocks. Going to have to do that more often.

I sat on the bed as he opened the laptop up and logged in. "Why am I not surprised?" he muttered.

"What?"

"Felicity didn't take a break, I'm starting to think she's half machine."

"It's possible. She find anything useful?"

"Yes and no. Lots of cryptic text messages. That's the problem with burner phones, you miss out on the prior conversations because it was on a different number. Looks like Gordon got this group pretty well trained as hunters, none of the messages on these phones date back more than two weeks. No name so far for the leader chick, just refer to her or them as the alphas. Sounds like everyone was pretty scared of them though."

"Oh fun."

"She went through the site for any other references to the wolves Magnus talked about, didn't find anything."

"Didn't expect there to be. They didn't even know about Purgatory, why would they know about Alphas. It's all right. We'll go in loaded with silver, Magnus said that still worked. Shoot them full of silver and take the heads. Nothing's immune to that. Well, except a Knight of Hell, which these aren't, hopefully."

"Huh, we'd probably know more about them if they were. The Men of Letters did specialize in demons."

"True."

My text alert went off, it was Gerald. "Well here's some good news anyway." I said as I read through the message. "Everyone made it out of surgery, Rick's on his way back home and Gerald didn't tell him where anyone staying. Rick was fine with it and said he was sorry but it was probably safer for him to bail since that wolf or whoever got inside his head. Rick said he'd text you when he got home to let us know that his family was fine. He's already planning on moving them."

He shook his head and sighed, "Anything happens to his wife and kid..."

"We had to."

"I know, just..."

"I think the fact that he saved Gerald's ass and fought with us made an impression on the people who stayed. Hopefully they'll talk to Sean and Ruth and get them to chill out and keep things to themselves."

"God I hope so, speaking of God. I'll try to call Cas."

"Yeah." He dialed, put the phone on speaker and it started ringing. One ring, nothing. My eyes drifted around the room. It was kind of nice to not see cracks in the wall and a first class paint job done in light brown color. There weren't any questionable stains on the tv stand/dresser thing and the bed was memory foam. The comforter was soft and squishy in a good way and was a nice off white color. Everything was clean, spotless even. If we'd stayed in hotels like these growing up it wouldn't have been so bad. We were on the ninth ring when it went to voice mail.

"Cas, call us as soon as you can," Sam said. "We're worried." He hung up and looked at me.

"Wish he could teleport like the old days. If he got sent somewhere in the middle of Heaven who knows how long it will take him to find a portal."

"Maybe we could pray to Hannah?"

"And let her know he's there? He said that she'd helped convince them to not kill him but who knows how the balance of power is up there now."

"We've got to try something. At least to find out if he's still alive."

"I know but I can't think of a way to do that. You?"

He leaned back and shook his head, "No."

"Maybe Coyote can reach him somehow, he said she hits different wavelengths. If we don't hear from him in a couple of hours we can try that."

"All right, better than nothing I guess." His eyes drifted to the right of my head for a minute, he was getting ready to bring something awkward up. "So, you holding up all right?"

Called it, "Didn't snap or start going all Terminator so I guess so."

"Good, but that wasn't what I was getting at." He glanced towards the door.

I'd already changed how I was doing things with the hotel, room service and downtime request, may as well keep going, "Am I scared? Yeah, scared shitless, but I can't, scratch that, won't tell her what to do. I could tell her to go home or stay in the room while we go out and fight this bitch, but it wouldn't make a difference. You know her, you think she would sit this out?"

"No, I know she won't."

"She accepted me with all my baggage and crap, I owe her the same respect. This is who she is and I wouldn't change it. If that means I freak out a day before we head into some major crap, so be it. I got it out of my system, better to do it now then when we're in the middle of a fight."

His eyes stayed locked onto mine for a long minute, we both didn't talk about the real question on his mind. The what if question. I already knew the answer and I had a feeling he did too. "All right. Just checking in."

My whole mood shifted, I wanted to be next to her, not here. "Thanks. Look, since there's nothing new I'll head back over there. Anything pops up let me know."

"Sure. I'll check in on Oliver too."

"Good."

I walked back across the hall, changed into some sweats, curled up next to her and put tomorrow out of my mind. I was holding her, she was alive. That was all that I cared about, all I needed.


	23. Wavelengths

Coyote wasn't next to me when I woke up. The room was dark and I really didn't remember falling asleep, I didn't think I'd been all that tired. I rolled over and saw her sitting next to the window. She was holding back the curtain just enough so she could stare outside. Her legs were curled up in the chair, chin resting on her left arm which was propped up on her right knee while her right hand held the curtain. She was pretty deep in thought, especially for two in the morning. She wasn't crying but something was bothering her.

"What's wrong?"

"Cas is all right, at least he's alive."

I sat up, "What?"

She kept looking out the window, "I heard him, or felt him, or something. in my sleep. I can't explain how or why, but I felt him running, hiding. He must have sensed me somehow, he said to tell you he's alive and should be back soon. Then he was gone. He was nervous, but seemed pretty confident he'd make it out."

"That's good to know, I guess."

"Yeah.."

"And?"

She let the curtain drop and turned her head. It was almost too dark to make out much on her face, but I didn't really need to because she slid back into bed and wrapped her arms around me, her face felt cold and damp. She'd been crying. Not good, not good at all.

"Honey?"

"I've never seen him before, Brother Wolf. He never comes to me, not like this. We were walking through the woods and came to a place where the road split into several paths. We sat down and he told me to tell you that what will happen is not the same as what has happened, and to wait before you truly begin to fight back. You have to wait."

Not liking the sound of that, "Okay? What else?" She didn't answer, I started to panic. "Do not keep me in the dark right now, please."

"That this may be one of the last times I can speak to him, to any of them. If I stay on this path I may no longer be who I was. Then he left."

That stopped me cold. "You're not coming, that's final." I basically ordered, I knew it would piss her off but I didn't care. "No way in hell. We're going up against werewolves, not having you get turned."

"He didn't.."

I clicked on the light next to the bed. Both of us winced, then I rolled away from her and stood up. I was way too unstable right then to be next to her, "No. I will not put a silver bullet in you. Not when we've been warned. It was bad enough watching Sam have to do that to someone he'd gotten close to. Not happening."

She sat up and stared me down. Damn it! "You just fought to save Rick from getting taken out by hunters," she snapped. "You don't think we could work around it if that's even what he's talking about?"

"We don't have enough problems fitting in with your people as it is?" I couldn't let her take the risk.

"So we move. Live in the Bunker, we'd figure it out. Dean, for fuck's sake he could have been saying that they wouldn't watch over me anymore because I left the tribe. He could be referring to the fact that I'll learn some earthshaking thing and it will change what I want to do with my skills. I turned them off before, remember? It was the usual cryptic warning. Yes, it upset me, but I'm not backing away from this fight. Who knows, maybe you get turned and I have to decide whether to end you or not. Ever think about that? You're not immortal anymore, so stop acting like I'm the only one that can get hurt or die. Maybe you die and I have to deal with that? Maybe that's why I'm crying jackass. Ever think about that? You don't know, neither do I. All we know is that something will happen, like I already said. Are we going to fight about this? Is this how you want to spend tonight? Fighting about shit that we already knew could happen. We're hunting, people get hurt, people change. This is no different."

"Oh really? You never cried before any of our hunts in the past. Don't think you can just blow this off!" That's when she stood up and she didn't flinch or limp, her ankle wasn't hurting her. I'd have even less leverage now. Great.

"Don't be an idiot. I'm coming with you. I supported you helping Jacob even though I didn't agree with it, I didn't say shit when you got into that fight with Badger or when you decided to help Sam with this. Did I once tell you no? Did I? You had the worst nightmare you've had in months, yet I still backed you. Do you or do you not owe me the same respect? You think you're the only one scared about losing someone here? I know this is how you are, I know why and I understand it, but I made my choice. If you didn't want to risk losing me we should have just stayed home!"

We stood there. My brain was running through all the various awful ways she could get killed out there, what could happen. She was less than two feet away from me, pissed off but calm as could be. Why the hell had I let myself get into this? There wasn't a single thing I could say to contradict her, not a one. I don't know why I was surprised, it's not like Sam had ever listened to me much over the years. I'd always had this stupid idea that at some point I'd been in control of things. Who the fuck was I kidding? I'd gotten used to Sam just deferring to me, even if half the time he'd end up doing what he thought was right anyway. Coyote didn't defer to anyone, as much as I loved that about her, right then it was pissing me off. I just wanted to keep her safe. There was no point yelling about it though, she wouldn't change her mind.

I turned away and grabbed some clothes, "I'll be back later." I didn't want to sit there and be pissed off or fight about it, but I needed to move. There was too much going on in my head to lay back down or get past it.

She put her hand on my shoulder, "Dean...I'm...that came out a lot harsher than..."

"Don't." I stopped her, "Can't argue with a thing you said, not going to try. I won't tell you what to do, you wouldn't listen anyway." I shrugged her hand off my shoulder, threw my shirt on, picked up my boots, wallet and keys and left. Sam was probably asleep, I didn't need to talk, I needed a drink.

I put my shoes on in the hall and walked towards the lobby. I doubted the bar or lounge would still be open but it was, I'd forgotten this hotel was close to an airport, guess they had to cater to late night travelers. I know if I'd just gotten off a plane at two in the morning, I'd need to get wasted. I'd need to be wasted to get on a plane too come to think about it, wasted or knocked out by one of Oliver's darts.

The lounge/bar area had two levels, there was a step up to get to the bar, glass topped tables with low chairs were clustered around the bar itself. Only the far corner of the bar had bar stools. On the lower level about ten or fifteen groups of cushioned chairs were scattered around. It looked more like a large living room than a restaurant or bar. There was a group of Japanese businessmen working on their laptops on the top of level, a single white guy at the far back table on the lower section looking at his phone, and a group of twenty somethings looking like they'd just got off a fifteen hour flight. They had that too exhausted to sleep look about them. The chairs had these geometric patterns done in various shades of red and white, the floor was tile and there were several modern art looking chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. It was obvious they were going for late night/early morning mood lighting, all the lights were dimmed to nocturnal people levels.

I made my way up to the bar and caught a reflection in the windows that faced the pool, Oliver. He was sitting in a corner table and had shifted the chair so the back of it was facing the entrance into the lounge, with the lighting and the reflections in the windows he could see everything that was going on but most people wouldn't see him right off. Which is really the perfect set up for paranoid people. He looked like he was gazing out at the pool but I saw the instant he spotted me. His right hand lifted up, he was holding a beer. He didn't get up or do anything else, probably figuring if I wanted company I'd go join him. If I didn't he wasn't going to push it. People like us are never up at two am for a good reason.

I contemplated just sitting by myself, which felt pretty silly. What was I going to do, sit in a corner and sulk? The bartender looked at me, "What can I get you?" he asked with a smile on his face. He must like working nights.

"Double, best whiskey you have, and a Newcastle Red." That was what Oliver had in his hand, if I was going to join him I may as well bring him a beer.

He poured my double and slid it to me. I downed it and slid the glass right back. "Get me two more of those, going to join my friend over there." I pointed in Oliver's general direction.

"Sure thing." The bartender seemed pretty impressed that I was hitting it that hard at this time of night, but he poured the shots, put the glasses and the beer on a tray and brought it to me. "Here you go."

I tossed some money on the bar and picked up the tray, "Thanks. Keep the change."

I took the chair across from Oliver and set the beer on the table next to him. "Guess two in the morning is like noon for you, what with your job and all."

The right side of his mouth twitched into a quick smile then faded, "Pretty much. I tend to not sleep more than four or five hours a night anyway, even when I'm not on call."

"They still that bad?" I knew he had nightmares like the rest of us, but I thought he'd be sleeping better after all these years.

He shook his head, "No. They still wake me up at times, it's just the sleep schedule I got used to over the years. It started when I was still doing the playboy thing, just never stopped. Thanks for the fresh beer."

"Oh. No problem." I drank this shot a little slower.

He studied me over the top of his beer bottle as he took another drink. "Anything I need to know?"

"Cas is okay. Somehow he and Coyote connected while she was sleeping. He's working on getting back."

He nodded. "That's good to know. I was worried about him." Then he pointed at the shot glasses, "Celebrating?"

I debated on getting more into it, I knew he'd already picked up on the fact that something was off but since Bobby died I hadn't really opened up to anyone other than Sam or Cas until Coyote and I had gotten together. Oliver and I had shared stories over the years but anything deeper tended to be spur of the moment. He'd pick up on me being edgy or I'd tell him was he was being stubborn but we'd never really had a heart to heart since the night in his penthouse after taking out all those demons. We were similar enough we pretty much knew what the other one was thinking anyway. I downed the rest of the second shot and set the glass back down. He was here, so was I and I didn't think driving around with bullet holes Baby's side would be a such a great idea. If anyone other than Sam would understand this shit, it'd be him. "Coyote also got a memo from the higher ups saying if she keeps going the way she is that they might not be talking to her much anymore." There weren't people within earshot of us but I felt better being vague, he'd understand what I was really saying.

His hand froze on the way to set his beer bottle down, "Any specifics?"

"No. Could be that she wouldn't be in a position to talk to them, or that she chose to close things off or who knows what. She was pretty upset about it though."

"You told her to stay?"

"I tried."

"And?"

"And it was like talking to myself. She won't back down, told me I had no right to tell her no when she'd been backing me this whole time. I just...I want her to be safe, man. That's all."

He finally set his beer down and a wry understanding grin livened up his face, "I am very familiar with that feeling and conversation."

"Figured you might be," That wasn't what was eating at me though. "Are we selfish?"

That caught him a bit off guard, "Come again?"

"I mean, we always think about how fucked up it would be if we lost them, not how it'd hurt them to lose us. Felicity made a comment back at your place before we fixed me that it's so much easier to just hurl ourselves into these things than think about how it affects them. She compared my choice years ago to save Sam with taking the Mark, that I only thought of me, not him. She was right. Coyote threw that at me tonight too. That I'm not the only one scared shitless about losing someone. So, do we do what we do because we're selfish somehow?" I've seen Oliver enraged, deadly, happy, plotting someone's death and a lot of variations of that in between, but I'd never seen him caught somewhere between confused and pensive. I must have hit a nerve somewhere.

"I'm not sure if selfish is the right word," he replied after a minute or two, "Maybe overly focused is a better term."

"Focused? On what? Getting killed again? I've died so many times it feels more like an inconvenience then an actual permanent condition."

That earned me a flat stare, "Not everyone is as well connected as you are. Perhaps that is part of the problem, at least for you. Others stay dead, you don't seem to."

Blunt, but accurate. "That's me, what about you?"

He started getting defensive but for some reason he stopped himself, "Years ago, someone told me emotional attachments are a weakness. I've since come to see that differently, but, the fact remains that when you're about to do the things we do, if you consider what others are thinking it gets in the way."

"Ever think that maybe they had some important things to contribute? Not saying that to be a dick, just trying to see things differently. Roy told us about how you were acting when you pulled the martyr bit. I'm not criticizing, got no room to speak. Look, we've both decided to get involved with someone and I really don't like arguing with her, I'm sure you don't like fighting with Felicity. I guess I'm trying to figure out how to pull this off without losing my damn mind or her."

He leaned back in his chair, his eyes were focused on the pool on the other side of the glass."We're both dating women who are fearless, we knew that from the moment we saw them. Unfortunately, you and I are both control freaks, it's the nature of who we've had to become to survive. There's very little in our lives we can actually control so we fight tooth and nail to control those few variables we can, or think we can. For the most part our friends let us think that we are in charge when we all know damn well we're not. When something comes along that ruins that illusion, it sets us back on our heels, makes us panic. We don't think of how they'd feel if they lost us because all we really can control is ourselves. If you were to stop and think about how devastated Coyote would be if you died, you would have to relinquish your ability to control your own fate. You'd be paralyzed and unable to act when you need to in order to save others because you don't want to put her through that.

Back before the shipwreck, I had friends that got engaged or married and they all joked about how they were giving up their freedom, the old ball and chain saying. It's not wrong, when you let someone into your life you're agreeing to take their wishes and needs into account. For normal people, that's not such a big deal. For people like us, it can be fatal. When I am out there with Roy, Dig and now Laurel and my sister, if I were to face up to the reality of how losing me again would affect them, I'd never be able to draw that bowstring back, never suit up. Does that propel us to make bad decisions at times? Yes, there's no denying that." He pulled his eyes away from the pool and back to me. It was almost as intense of a gaze as Cas does sometimes. "But, if you were to sit here and imagine exactly what would happen to Coyote if she lost you, would you be able to go out there tomorrow? Can you even bring yourself to think about it?"

I tried for about thirty seconds. Imagining her watching my body burn on a pyre almost made me puke up my drinks. "See your point."

He finished off his beer and opened the one I'd bought. "On some level yes it's entirely selfish, but on another level it's the only way we can keep them safe when they're determined to fight along side us whether we want them to or not."

I started on my last glass of whiskey, "Think about this a lot over the years?"

"Felicity isn't the first fearless woman I've loved, remember Shado?"

"Yeah."

"Then there was Sara." I could tell that one still hurt him. His voice had softened when he said her name. "What it comes down to is this. When we're suited up, on a job and out in the field, I force myself to see them as tools, as extensions of me. They're weapons, just as I am. Emotions can't come into play. Afterwards, when we're back, that's when we feel things again. You're not used to working with anyone other than Sam and you two have been together so long you can shift in and out of feeling or not feeling things with him in a heartbeat. I've seen you do it. From what I can tell this is your first job with a woman you're in love with, right?"

"Yeah."

"Take it from me, it's a million times harder. That's why I fought getting too close to Felicity." He took a long drink, then set the beer on his knee instead of the table. "The only way you get through this without losing your mind is seeing Coyote as another hunter and making damn sure you're on your game. After it's over, then you can find somewhere to fall apart."

"Where do you go to fall apart?"

He finished off his beer, there was an edge to him that hadn't been there seconds before, "It depends on if anyone I love got hurt or not."

I got the drift. The edge that he'd taken on somehow got my head back on straight, "Think you'll be up for a walk in the park in the morning?"

Heart to heart Oliver faded completely, Arrow Oliver took over, "Don't see why not."

"Ever track huge wolves in the woods?"

The only emotion showing on his face was in his eyes, he wanted a piece of these things as much as I did. "I'm sure I can find them. Roy said Coyote knows her way around tracking too."

I felt a sliver of fear for her worm through me, but I dismissed it, "Yeah. Let's meet here around nine? Maybe we spot them before they spot us?"

"I'll need to use some of your tools," he said, "Mine are a bit obvious in daylight."

"Sure, we've got spares."

He picked up his empty bottles and stood up, "Sounds like a plan. See you then."

"Yup, thanks for the talk."

"Of course." He walked off. I finished my drink then headed back to my room. I had monsters to kill and had to be on my game, too many people were depending on me.

The light was off in the room, I made out the outline of her body on the bed as my eyes adjusted. She rolled over as I let the door close behind me.

"Babe? I shouldn't have yelled at you."

"Let's get something straight okay?"

She sat up. "Okay."

"I will never, ever stop wanting to keep you safe. I wish to Hell that you would stay here, not because I think you can't handle the hunt or want to control you in some way, it's because I don't want to worry about you. I know that sounds selfish because it seems like I don't get how scared you are. That's not it, I do, but I can't worry about how you're feeling on top of how freaked this whole things makes me. If I did that, I wouldn't walk out that door tomorrow because I never, ever want to hurt you like that. I can't even picture you at my funeral, it hurts too damn much." I sat down next to her, and her arms went around me just as fast as mine did around her. "So I'm going to do this. I'm going to pretend like Brother Wolf never talked to you. We go in, kill these fucking things, go home, book a cruise and move on with life. If you get any more hints and they're not specific, don't tell me. I don't want to know. I ran into Oliver in the lounge. We thought it might be worth it to go out in the morning and try to track these things down. No point sitting around here staring at the walls. I'll need you to help track. You up for it?"

She leaned her head on my shoulder,"Wolves that size? Should be easy to spot. I'm there. Sam and Roy going to be in on this too?"

"Course. More eyes the better."

"Guess we should get some more sleep then."

There was no hesitation or fear in her voice, she was game for anything. All my stupid jitters left at that point. We were hunters again, just like we had been years ago. We hunt things and take whatever comes our way.

"I told Oliver to meet at nine," I said as I ran my hand down her side and across her stomach. "That gives us seven hours and I'm not tired. You?"

In half a second she was straddling me while yanking my shirt off. "Not one bit."

Fuck the last night on earth crap, I had a cruise to go on with the hottest woman I've ever known. This wolf bitch had no idea what the hell was coming for her, none at all.


	24. Sunrise

Sex, while being fun and entertaining, can do you a lot of good. In this case, by the time we'd finished there was the sense of being grounded again, of focus that I hadn't had before. That and being exhausted for all the right reasons. When my alarm went off I didn't wake up dreading what was to come. Shit was going to go down but I was all right with it because I knew that we'd make it through, one way or other. Not just Sam and I, but all of us. There was no damn way I let it go any other way.

She was curled up facing away from me, I ran my hand down her arm, "Let's go. Morning workout time, killer cardio and all."

"You know, there should be a workout based on being a hunter."

"Huh, three hundred twelve ounce curls a day, run like Death is after you, wild sex for a cool down and carb load like there's no tomorrow? Not sure that's going to be recommended by any health professionals."

She rolled over and smiled, "What health fad ever is?"

"Good point. I'll have Sam put that up on youtube, we'll make millions."

"Hooray, all our worries are over."

I gave her a quick kiss, rolled out of bed and texted Sam, "Get up, meeting Oliver in the lobby at nine."

About thirty seconds later my phone buzzed, "Plans change?"

"Yeah. Tell you at breakfast."

"Hotel restaurant?"

"Yup. See you there in twenty."

"Got it."

I took a quick shower, it was 7:30, plenty of time to catch him up and go get supplies for a hike. We ran into each other in the hall, guess we were back in sync with each other.

"Why?" He asked without any lead in, didn't need it. He had his laptop and bag with him, he was ready to roll.

"No point to sit here and stare at walls for a whole day."

"That park isn't small."

"Good thing we've got a few top notch trackers then isn't it?"

He frowned, "We don't even know if they're there yet."

"They are." My instincts were back online, thankfully. Several things had clicked in my head while I was getting ready. Wolf bitch had referred to her pack, they took full wolf form and from what Magnus had said they'd pretty much acted like regular, non-monster wolves. They wouldn't be hunting in totally unfamiliar territory. The random deaths that Sam had found were not all that far from here taking into account that we were dealing with wolves who could easily cover fifty-sixty miles a day in wolf form, not counting what they could cover when they had two hands and a car. "Did you get any maps or information about the park last night?" I asked as we walked into the lobby, "Other than size?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Any caves?"

I saw him start to catch up to my train of thought, the slow nod and wide eyes told me all I needed. "Two."

"Bet you dinner they're hanging out close to one of them when they're furry."

We crossed the floor and walked into the lobby restaurant and I had to stop myself from laughing, "I wonder if he even went back to bed."

"Huh?" Sam asked. I pointed at the back table. Oliver and Roy were there along with five decent sized backpacks that looked pretty well stuffed. "Nice," he said, "One less thing to do this morning."

Roy spotted us and gave a quick wave. There just happened to be three more seats at their table too. Coincidence? I doubt it. We told the hostess chick we were joining them and took a seat. I sat next to Oliver, Sam next to Roy and we ordered some coffee from the waitress who'd headed over as soon as she saw where we were going.

"Morning," Roy said.

"Morning. Do some late night Wal-Mart shopping?" I asked.

Oliver smiled, "Technically early morning, the sun had just come up. Got everything we'll need."

"Good. Sam found some cool caves we can check out while we're out there. Coyote should be down in a few."

They were dressed in standard hiking clothes. Roy was wearing a green long sleeve plaid shirt over a white t-shirt, Oliver was in one of those long sleeve cotton shirts, it was black, like his jeans. Sam and I were in our usual double layers, we'd grab our jackets on the way out. We ordered breakfast and chatted about random crap while waiting for Coyote who showed up about twenty minutes later, most of that was probably spent drying and braiding her hair. She'd told me about a month after I moved in that if she bothered with makeup it'd take her way too damn long to get ready. Her hair was enough of a choir as it was. She'd done two braids this time, I thought that always made her look younger. She was in a green long sleeve button up shirt that was half buttoned up, brown tank top underneath and her jeans were just tight enough to show off her ass, one of my favorite parts. She was wearing knee high brown leather moccasins and she got a few looks from guys as she walked in. Usually that doesn't bug me but I guess I was feeling extra territorial so when she sat down at the end of the table I leaned over and kissed her cheek. When I pulled back from her I swept my eyes across the room, two of the guys gave me a quick glare but looked away.

Sam's right eyebrow went up, "That really necessary?"

He wasn't referring to the kiss. I shrugged, "Just practicing."

He shook his head and took a sip of coffee before he spoke. "Practicing what? Being intimidating?"

"Just making sure I hadn't gotten rusty."

"I don't think that's an actual possibility. It's in your genes."

"Shut up."

Coyote chuckled and patted my hand, "It's so adorable when your inner caveman comes out."

Roy almost choked on his orange juice and Oliver sighed.

"You really don't need to take his side here," I told her and took another bite of my eggs.

"But it's so much fun," she countered.

I chose to keep my mouth shut, no way I was winning this one. She ordered her food, we finished up and headed out. We decided to just take Baby, she fit five and had everything we needed. Oliver, thinking ahead as usual, had somehow found a car cover that we'd throw over her when we parked. Bullet holes tend to attract attention. I'd parked her as far back in the hotel parking lot as I could in a space where the shot up side faced a wall to make it harder for people to see the bullet holes. There was no guarantee we'd be able to find a space like that at the park, so car cover.

The park was an hour drive from the hotel, it was a quiet hour. Sam had pulled up some topographical maps on the laptop that we'd printed out using the hotel's business center and we'd plotted our route to the two caves before we left so there wasn't too much to talk about on the drive.

The entrance to the park showed up on my right, I pulled in and we all got out. It was empty, which was nice since we were unloading weapons. I popped the trunk, Sam and I grabbed our usual guns, then Coyote took hers and Oliver grabbed some for him and handed a few to Roy. It was weird watching Oliver handle a gun. There was no doubt he was a pro, he checked his weapons just like Sam and I do but it was just something I'd never seen before. Roy was a bit slower but he knew what he was doing. As Oliver tucked one of the 9 mils in his waistband and one inside the jacket he'd grabbed before we left he somehow seemed even deadlier than usual, colder. It didn't take me long to understand why, he was in a different mindset. Arrow was all about not killing, hunting however, requires it. This was who Oliver had become during those five years of hell. It was who I'd been all my life. I saw the switch over happen in Sam and Coyote too. Roy wasn't as far gone as we were, he hadn't killed nearly enough things in his lifetime but he was still plenty scary looking. Oliver and Roy switched into their boots from their vigilante suits and shoved their other shoes into the trunk.

"If it's okay with you guys," Oliver said, "I'll take point."

I saw no reason to argue, "I'll bring up the rear," I replied, "Rest of you, spread out a bit. Let's not make it easy for them if they do spot us."

We grabbed the backpacks, covered Baby up and headed down the trail. Oliver vanished within the first two minutes. Just disappeared into the woods.

"Impressive," Coyote said when between one blink and the next we lost sight of him. "He's as good as Cougar is."

"First time he did that when we were training I flipped out," Roy said.

Sam's eyes got this distant look, "First time it happened with me, I ended up flat on my face about five minutes later. He'd attacked me and sliced my hand before I could even think. Never saw him."

Seeing Oliver move like that gave me a bit more hope that we may all make it out of here in one piece.

We scanned the surroundings as we walked. Coyote kept her head down looking for any huge ass paw prints and I put myself back into Purgatory paranoid mood, which meant listening for any sound or lack of sound that seemed out of place.

"Nothing so far." Came from behind me.

I was reaching for my gun and turning before I realized it was Oliver, "A little warning next time! Jesus!"

He didn't say a word, just stared at me with those cold blue eyes. "Your instincts need help. Been following you for the last thirty feet."

That managed to piss me off and worry me at the same time. "They're on high alert now. Thanks."

"Hope so," he said. "I'll keep checking."

I was watching him the whole time and I still couldn't tell how he did it. Damn. One second he was there, forty feet away jogging into the treeline, the next second he was just gone. I needed some lessons. The rest of them didn't say anything and we resumed our hike. I put my head on even more of a swivel, I'd be damned if Oliver was going to sneak up on me again.

We made it about another hour before we decided to take a quick break and check the maps. I'd managed to spot Oliver twice more when he popped up out of nowhere. Seeing as how he'd checked in four more times since that first time I was at fifty percent, which would have gotten me killed in Purgatory. It'd sure as hell made me a lot more aware of how out of practice I was. Coyote had done better, she'd seen him three times, same with Roy. Sam had only managed it once. Guess he'd been concentrating on fight training, not tracking. Whether or not I ever hunted again after this I'd decided to make it a point to train with Oliver for a few weeks at some point. He was beyond scary good.

Oliver reappeared and checked the maps. "If we keep this pace and heading, we'll hit that first cave in another hour. I've spotted a few abnormal things but can't be a hundred percent sure on it being them. There's animals here I'm not used to tracking so could be that."

"Yeah, me too," Coyote added. "I found a few odd tufts of fur and what looks like a paw print but nothing definite."

"Rest for five minutes, then head out." Oliver ordered. "I'll clear the path ahead." He handed the map back to Sam and left. I looked down at where he'd just been standing. I could just barely make out footprints where'd he stood and there was one light indentation of the ball of his right foot when he'd started jogging into the woods, then nothing. I'd always respected his skills, but this pushed it up a whole lot of notches.

We waited exactly five minutes and followed him, not a single one of us questioning who was in charge right now. It sure as hell wasn't me.


	25. Predator vs Hunter

Thirty minutes later Oliver came running full speed at us, gun drawn, we all froze. He didn't say anything, just pointed to the edges of the trail and held up two fingers then pointed behind him. All of us grabbed guns and put more space between us, no way we were clumping into a herd like deer.

Coyote and I spotted a wolf behind Oliver, there wasn't even a question is if it was a normal wolf. It leapt towards us, front paws spread wide like a cat. We fired but it somehow twisted out of the way of our bullets and darted into the trees.

"Dean! Behind you!" Oliver shouted just as a massive amount of pain shot up my legs making me scream and dropping me to my knees. It wasn't by choice, I literally couldn't stand.

"Dean!" Sam yelled and fired just as I saw a huge brown wolf appear behind him and take out both his hamstrings. I felt something jump over me and a dark grey wolf landed in front of me. Oliver fired six shots, three of them hit but the wolf barely flinched.

"Oliver move!" I managed to say just before a smaller black wolf went for him. He managed to spin away but it didn't help much. The black wolf got his right hamstring with it's claws, he rolled, came back up in a crouch at the same instant Roy threw himself forward in a dive roll, narrowly avoiding the same brown wolf that had taken out Sam.

Coyote followed Roy's example and I thought she was in the clear until a huge grey wolf landed on top of her and sunk it's fangs into her legs. My heart hit the ground as she cried out in pain, "No!"

Roy finished his roll and took a shot at the grey wolf on top of Coyote, I saw it hit, point blank into the shoulder. The wolf just snarled and nailed Roy with it's massive right paw. Roy flew back at least ten feet as blood spread across his shirt. He slammed into a rock and his eyes rolled back into his head, he was out cold.

None of us could stand but that didn't our hands still worked. I fought through the pain, brought my gun up, aimed it at the grey wolf and fired. I didn't miss but it didn't matter. The wolf's left paw flashed out, swept the gun out of my hand and ripped my hand to shreds. I could feel the blood loss from having both my hamstrings ripped out of my leg already hitting me.

Sam's arm came up but the wolves didn't even give us a chance. I watched as they totally destroyed Oliver, Coyote and Sam's hands. Roy was unconscious so they didn't bother with him.

Coyote pushed herself up with her one good arm, "Get it over with you bastards!"

The grey wolf looked at the other wolves who stepped back from our shattered bodies and sat down. The grey wolf's head dropped down and it started panting. The next thing we heard was the sound of hundreds of bones cracking and breaking, it's leg bones shifted so that the knees faced front instead of back. It's front legs lost fur first as they grew smaller and lengthened, fingers appearing where claws had been. The tail shrunk, it's body grew smaller, the fur seemed to recede into the pale human skin that took it's place. Breast grew out of it's chest, the muzzle shrank into a nose, shoulder length straight blonde hair snaked down from her head and the back legs became feet. It couldn't have been more than three minutes from the time she started shifting to seeing a naked woman standing in the middle of us. The whole thing from Oliver running towards us to now hadn't taken more than five minutes tops. We were still breathing because she wanted us alive. Whatever this bitch was up to, we had to stop her or there wouldn't be a hunter left by the end of the year.

She wasn't tall, probably about 5'6 but she was all muscle, pale, like Viking pale, her hair was straight and that rare color of blonde where it was closer to white then blonde but her eyes are what jumped out at me. One was bright green, the other was pale blue and by any standard she was off the charts hot. When she looked at me all I felt was a burning desire to follow her, obey her. It was so strong I felt like I couldn't even maintain eye contact for more than a second. I fought it as hard as I could, as hard as anything I'd ever fought against in my life, but in the end I couldn't do it. One by one she looked at Sam, Oliver and then Coyote. They all fought it, the compulsion to look away but one by one their eyes lowered.

She made it back to me, I tried to meet her eyes again but couldn't do it, she just smiled. "Dean I presume? I applaud your strength of will, all of you, but you've already lost this contest, your kind always does." Her voice was soft, but nothing in that softness was yielding or gentle. "I am Mariyn, and we have much to discuss." She crouched down and ran her hand down my chest.

I kept my eyes trained on her chin, "Thanks, you're hot and all but you and I have different ideas of a good time."

"I highly doubt it. I truly hope you survive, you'd be an impressive addition to my pack." The she stood back up, "Any of you would to be honest but the odds are against you."

"Survive what?" Oliver growled.

"Why your rebirth of course," she said as she got back on all fours.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Coyote asked, "You've already bitten us."

Mairyn's face twisted with disgust, "Those creatures you call werewolves, they are nothing. They are so far removed from pure it's like calling a rat a human. You both have skin, breathe air and have a few similar genes but that's as far as it goes. Werewolves! Please. They are pathetic creatures, forever stuck in a half existence, unable to control their true nature. I fully intend to rid the world of them. To become true werewolves requires much more than a mere bite."

Her body tensed as she arched her back and the whole process reversed. Minutes later she'd become a wolf again. She clamped her jaws around the back of my head and started walking, dragging me along with her. We made it two steps before I blacked out from the pain.

Something cold and wet hit my face and I struggled to open my eyes. "Wake up!" Mairyn ordered.

I managed to focus my vision and saw we were in a cave. Sam was on the ground next to me, groaning, Coyote was to my right and Oliver was laid out in front of me with Roy next to him. All of us had water on our faces. Sam lifted his head up and looked at me.

"You owe me dinner," I said.

"Shut the hell up," he replied.

One thing I can always count on with him. No matter how bad off we are, he always backs my cocky ass attitude, even when we both know it's complete bullshit.

Four wolves walked up to us, snarling, fangs bared and their hackles raised. I looked over at Mairyn, she raised her hands up and closed her eyes. "It's been eons since I've been able to preside over the birth of a new pack member. The last of my children were killed decades ago. We've resided in Purgatory for all these years. Then an angel, a vampire and a human showed us a way out. We will not stop until we take back the place we held for centuries." Her eyes opened and I felt myself tilting my head to give the wolf standing over me clear access to my throat. "To become a true wolf, you must come shed your human soul, must embrace the wilds, the freedom, the hunt. You must die and choose to be reborn as something beyond yourself, as part of the pack, loyal to us. You will lose your own identity to strengthen the pack as a whole. Very few ever survive the journey and even if they do, many cannot make the adjustment and go mad. When I heard of you Dean and then discovered Sam's history I knew that you two would be prime candidates. I decided to claim you as my own, you would help me rebuild what had been taken from me. I cannot wait to see your wolf."

I wanted to make a smart ass remark, but I couldn't. It was there in my head but I couldn't make the words come out.

"Good luck." She clapped her hands. As if they were one wolf, the four wolves lifted their paws, claws fully extended. No, God no..not again...not this way.

"Dean!" Coyote and Sam shouted. I couldn't even reply, couldn't think, couldn't act. I'd relived this countless times in my nightmares. There was nothing to be done, to do. I couldn't walk, couldn't move, had no weapons. What Brother Wolf had said to Coyote came back to me. It wasn't going to be the same, I wasn't going to Hell. He'd said to wait to fight. Her guides had given me some hope that someone, some thing was going to help us. So, for once in my life I did what something more powerful than me told me to do. I didn't fight. I just closed my eyes as Coyote's voice reached ever higher pitches which barely covered up the sounds of the wolves growls. Sam's tortured screams echoed off the walls. Oliver and Roy's voices blended together and went on and on. There was no way to describe the pain as claws tore deep into my chest and stomach. It seemed to go on and on, then it ended.

There was no pain, no screams, just silence.


	26. Transitions

There was no way for me to tell how long the silence lasted. I was pretty sure I wasn't technically dead since there was nothing around me except darkness, or maybe I was and all the usual places I'd end up didn't want me back. Which made no sense, Crowley'd would probably love to take another crack at making me his right hand demon. Heaven? Well I doubted they'd ever really get over me denying Michael and humans aren't supposed to go to Purgatory. Maybe this was the Veil and I'd just be stuck here forever. Of all the possible options that one bothered me the least, it'd be peaceful if nothing else.

" _Dean..."_

I didn't recognize the voice, it was male-ish. "Yeah?"

 _"Dean..."_

"Heard you the first time." I tried to locate the direction it was coming from.

 _"Not outside, inside."_

"What?"

 _"Oh for fuck's sake. It's me, us, you."_

That sounded a lot like me. I felt something furry brush against my legs. "What the?" A whole slew of emotions flooded through me. Oh. "You talk?"

" _Took you long enough. I've always talked, you just had no idea how to listen."_

A small circle of soft, diffused light appeared to the left of me, there he was, my Warrior Spirit. He looked even better than last time. The grey had faded more, most of his fur was back and his eyes were filled with life. "Glad you're looking better. Guess last night with Coyote helped more than I realized."

One of his ears twisted down, I got the impression that was his version of exasperation. " _Yes, it's all about the mating of course. We'll just skip past the existential conversation here, you know, the fact that we're hanging on to life by a thread and on the way to becoming a werewolf."_

"You don't have to be...wait, you're me, yeah you do. Never mind. How about I shock both of us and ask the obvious question. What do I need to do here?"

His ear righted itself, he cocked his head to the side and let his tongue hang out. I was laughing at myself, my brain hurt.

 _"I like this new side of us. I was getting tired of being nearly destroyed repeatedly."_

"You and me both, or, whatever."

He sat down and turned his head, when he did a path opened up. There was a massive old growth forest beyond it, it looked like something you only see in movies now. Completely untouched and wild. "What's that?"

 _"The beginning. What that bitch said, path to our rebirth, but there's someone we have to see before we go back. Feel him calling?"_

And then I did, it was subtle but powerful. Then I heard the song, Lakota. "Coyote's friends?"

The wolf looked back at me and nodded. " _Yes. Do you trust me?"_

"What? That makes no sense, you are me. I'd have to trust you right?"

In a flash he jumped on top of me, knocking me flat on my back, fangs bared as he growled in my face, his claws on my throat. Wait, he'd never had claws like that before, they were the same claws that Mairyn bitch had. Fully retractable cat type claws. "What the fuck?"

 _"If we walk out of here, leave this spot, this is what the rebirth will bring out. We can control it, I know we can, but are you willing to feel this again. There is no way back from this. We will be one of them. Forever. Decide."_

He didn't back off, just stood there and growled.

" _The others may not make it back, we may be alone, truly alone. Can we survive that?"_

"Can we kill that bitch?"

" _Possibly. She is dominant, we may not ever be able to attack her. We had to look away, remember?"_

"Don't need to look someone in the eye to kill them."

 _"It's not that simple. If we are pack, we have to follow orders, protect them."_

"Since when do we follow anyone's orders? They don't mean shit to me, why would I protect them? Get off." He put even more weight on me.

 _"Can you accept this side of us? Not just tolerate it, not push it down, accept it. If you cannot, you will go mad as she said, and we will be lost. I will not let you go unless you can. We must not go mad Dean, we will destroy many if we do, others will be forced to kill us."_

"How do you know so much about this?"

 _"He is telling me, we are connected. He says we have to give in, hunt once, accept the kill. Then we may have a chance."_

"Wait hold up. How do I even know you're me? That Mairyn chick got inside Rick's head."

Another voice answered, "You are speaking to your Warrior Spirit, chosen of my daughter. I am Brother Wolf. You are safe here, for the moment. You are connected to her, therefore connected to me. Time runs quickly however. Coyote has already chosen and is here, waiting for you."

For a second there I could barely breathe or think. She'd been turned. What the hell options did I have now? "What the fuck? She agreed to this? Why?"

"To do what must be done."

This felt so wrong, but Coyote had said I'd have to wait to fight back. Fuck. I looked at my wolf. He'd stopped snarling but was far from calm, he was scared. Hell, so was I. "Did you tell her this would happen?"

Silence answered my question, when he spoke again there was deep sorrow in his voice. "I told her if she stayed on this path she would be changed. She made her choice."

Cryptic fucking bastard. My wolf started snarling again, but it wasn't at me, he was aiming it at the opening where the path was. "Let me clarify, did you tell her details?"

A hot wind brushed over us, I guess I'd pissed him off, "Would it have made a difference? She knew it was a possibility, as did you. Do not blame me for your choices. Now you are here. Will you join her or fade?"

"Do you need to ask?" A surge of hate flowed through me, I shoved the wolf and he flew back a foot or two. "That bitch has to go down. What do I need to do?" First things first, kill the monster. Then decide how or if we should live after that.

"Listen to your Spirit, then follow the path." The sense of his presence faded.

" _Look at me."_ I did what he said, our eyes met. His were no longer yellow, they were shifting colors. _"Open up to me, let me in."_

"How?"

He lifted his right paw, " _Take hold of it."_ This felt like one of those cheesy fantasy movie scenes, where the warrior meets his spirit guide, it seemed totally ridiculous for some reason. _"Focus!"_

I took his paw in my hand. His eyes shifted to green, just like mine and everything spun. Memories assaulted me, not recent ones, but old ones. All the fights I'd been in as a kid, protecting Sam. Fighting just to fight because I hated my life but knowing that was the wrong reason to fight. The times I'd looked over a monster after I'd killed it and didn't feel a hint of regret, I'd enjoyed it. I held the ultimate power in my hand, I could choose to kill or not and I'd used it to take out something that was killing others. Purgatory, the simple truth of it. No complications. Kill or be killed. The freedom of running through those woods, Benny next to me. I started to deny it, deny all of it.

 _"Stop! Accept! This is who we are, who Coyote is, who Sam, Oliver, Roy are. Deep down. Predators, all of you. To survive you must accept."_

"It's wrong! All of it!"

 _"Is it? How many lives have we saved?"_

He had a point. "True, but to enjoy it, crave it. That's..."

 _"A part of it. It didn't clue you in when you saw me the first time that you are a predator?"_

"I ..."

" _You think there is something wrong with you, with us, because you enjoy the hunt. There is not. What we are, it is neutral. Predators are simply part of the natural order of things. There is nothing wrong with you. When given the unfettered choice to hunt, you choose the correct prey. Things that harm others. Others have twisted your nature, made you hate what you are. Accept who you are Dean. You know the guilt was not yours, now look at the rest of it."_

The whirlwind of memories stopped all of a sudden. Dad and I were at Bobby's, doing target practice in the back forty. Sam must have been inside somewhere. Dad was drilling me on rapid fire skills. A squirrel scurried in front of me. I trained my gun on it but I couldn't pull the trigger and it ran off.

"What stopped you?" Dad asked, "You had a clean shot."

"It's a squirrel, it's not hurting anything."

Dad gave me one of the few smiles I'd ever seen on his face. "That's the right answer Dean." He lowered his gun and pulled me close to him. We'd never hugged much, just wasn't who we were. "The more ways you learn to kill things, the harder it is to remember why we do what we do. Promise me something."

"Sure Dad."

"You're good son, damn good. You learn fast, you're tough and you're already a better fighter than some full grown men I know. There's nothing wrong with being proud of your skills. Just don't ever let someone else make you use them the wrong way. Hunting is a way of life, others may see it as some sort of thrill seeking thing. It's not. It's who we are, just like lions or wolves. The only time they hurt things they aren't supposed to is when they're forced to by people making it harder for them to live, be themselves. The fact that you can take out a target fifty yards away doesn't mean a damn thing on it's own, all it means is that you've practiced. It's what you're aiming at and why that makes the difference. Understand?"

"Yeah Dad, I do."

 _"Do you understand?"_

"Yeah wolf, I do." And we were no longer separate. I was on all fours, covered in fur and the air around me was filled with smells I'd never noticed before. My paws didn't make a sound as I loped down the path that Brother Wolf had laid out for me. My pack, my family, they needed me and I had a monster to put down. A thrill went through me at the thought of ripping Mairyn's throat out, I let it pass. She'd threatened me, it was natural. If she'd just stayed in Purgatory none of this would have happened. Sure, Cas, Benny and I had showed them a way out, but it was her choice to start shit. Not mine. Her choice to turn me, well that would be the last choice she'd ever make.

 _"Finally."_

"Sorry it took so long."

 _"I am patient. It's not like I don't know how stubborn we are."_

Between one step and the next I felt the wolf settle deep into me. All our protective nature, all our skills, our strengths, they were no longer divided. My vision sharpened, I could hear the smallest sounds and it made perfect sense that I'd be running on four feet instead of two. I picked up the pace, Coyote was waiting. No way I was letting her do this alone. I just hoped that by the time I got there Sam and the rest would be there too.


	27. The Path In the Woods

I loped through the woods for who knows how long. Things kept trying to distract me, rabbits, deer, birds singing. The smells and sounds were almost overwhelming. There were times I could barely focus on the pulling sensation that guided my steps. I ended up swimming through two small rivers before cresting the top of a hill and seeing a coyote sitting next to a bonfire and unbelievably huge snow white wolf. It made Mairyn seem tiny. The pulling sensation stopped and the coyote's head turned.

" _Dean!"_ I heard her voice in my head just as she started pelting full speed up the hill towards me. I barely processed that before she was rubbing along my side and yipping.

" _Uh, this is...well...weird."_ Part of me wanted to return her affections in some sort of canine way but the rest of me was more than a little confused by that whole idea. " _I love you and am thrilled to see you but, yeah. Can we not do the doggy greeting thing?"_

She laughed, in my head, while running her tongue along my muzzle. " _Sorry. Guess I'm more used to this whole alternate form thing than you are."_

 _"Uh, guess so."_ I really hoped I wouldn't remember this whole episode when we got back to our bodies. " _Any sign of anyone else? And are we stuck like this while we're here?"_

She sat down, " _Brother Wolf says Sam is on his way, Oliver and Roy are struggling. And yes, while we're here we stay furry."_

Great. That didn't sound good. _"Any way we can help them?"_

She shook her head, " _No. This is something they have to do. They are inside themselves, we can't intrude. Brother Wolf is doing what he can."_

I heard something, an almost silent step coming from behind me and caught a new scent. A scent I recognized, which I decided to not think about why I knew it. I turned my head, " _Glad you made it."_ I told him. Sam's wolf was about half the size of Brother Wolf, but still a bit bigger than I was. He wasn't as snowy white as Brother Wolf and had a few more scars but still a lot whiter than I was but it was the eyes that gave it away. In case the fact that I somehow recognized his scent as a wolf wasn't enough his eyes were the same as they would be if he was human, just in a wolf's head.

" _Yeah, me too."_

He wasn't nearly as confident as he was trying to sound. Something about the tilt of his ears, how he was walking and carrying his tail told me that it'd been pretty touch and go for him. Once again, I didn't dwell on how I would know to read wolf body language. My brain was hurting enough as it was.

 _"Glad to see you, all things considered,"_ he continued _, "You seem even less black. Is that a good sign?"_

 _"We'll go with yes."_

 _"Hey Coyote,"_ he said as he brushed his shoulder along hers. Apparently he was more okay with canine displays of affection than I was.

" _Sam, glad you're here."_

 _"Which is where?"_ He asked before he sat down and looked towards Brother Wolf.

" _We call it the Dreaming Lands,"_ she answered. _"Sort of like the veil that you talk about, but not really. We aren't dead or alive, we're in between."_

 _"I seriously need a check list of all the afterlives we've been to. I'm starting to lose track,"_ I said _._

Sam gave me a pretty good doggy equivalent of his exasperated look, " _We'll draw up a map when we get home."_

 _"Wouldn't it need to be multi-dimensional? Like that Star Wars multi level chess game? Not sure we have the tech for that."_

 _"Felicity could probably come up with something. Where's Oliver and Roy?"_

A hissing, growling, mewling sound filled the air and a black jaguar with icy blue eyes which lacked nearly all human thought and reason dropped down from some trees and landed behind Sam. Oliver, once again my nose informed me of who he was, and he wasn't looking too stable. His tail was twitching like crazy, his ears were flat, teeth bared and his fur was straight up as he crouched down and eyed us.

" _Oliver? Calm down man!"_ I said.

His back legs shifted like cat's do right before they pounce.

" _Dude, it's us. Sam, Dean and Coyote!"_

He came right for us. I was about to meet him in the air when Brother Wolf magically appeared in between us. Oliver slammed into him, bounced off and growled.

" _ **Peace Oliver Queen. Peace."**_

Brother Wolf's voice was overpowering. It resonated inside my head and shook me to my bones. There was no denying any command from that voice. He was the first of us, the first of the wolves and I had no idea why I knew that or what the hell it meant. All I knew was that shit, as usual, had just gotten a lot more complicated.

Oliver's tail stopped lashing all over the place, his eyes cleared a bit and he stopped growling. " _Who? Where? I..."_

Talk about utterly out of his depth, I know that feeling all too well.

" _ **You are in between life and death, in a safe place. Rest. The journey ahead, if you choose to undertake it, will be orders of magnitude worse than what it took for you to get here."**_

Of course it would.

Brother Wolf's head slowly turned to face me. His eyes were blue, like Cas'. There was a depth to them that I've learned to associate with supernatural shit that's way more powerful than I am. " _ **I heard that Dean Winchester."**_

 _"Just calling it like it is sir."_ Sir? I never say that, except to Dad.

 _ **"Do not think because you have been resurrected before that you will be prepared for this. No one doubts your desire to live, but your other resurrections were carried out by some other power. Yes, I know about them, they are seared into your Spirit. This one you must do completely on your own. All of you must."**_

It wasn't the words that chilled me, it was the tone and how he looked. This wasn't an angel saving my ass, this wasn't God just randomly deciding that I'd wake up somewhere. " _Care to explain that?"_

 ** _"In a moment."_** He went back to looking at Oliver, _**"Focus. Not on the instincts, but on reason."**_

 _"Reason? What's reason?"_ Oliver stammered, he was barely able to form words _._ _"I don't understand..."_

 ** _"What is the last thing you remember?"_**

His eyes shifted wildly left to right,but his ears seemed less flat. He looked less deadly and more scared. " _Before the..."_ A deep shudder rippled through his fur. " _I...I..."_

 _"Us hiking through the woods, the attack."_ I offered.

His eyes grew more focused, some of the tension left his muscles. _"Yes, the cave. Claws ripping into me. Roy..Roy! Where is he?"_

That was a good sign, for Oliver at least. He wasn't completely lost.

 _ **"He's started the journey here. He is very weak though."**_

That pushed the last of Oliver's confusion away, " _Where is he? We have to help him."_

 _" **You cannot. All of you were brought here on individual paths, none of them overlap. Not until you get to this point. There is no way to get to him."**_

 _"Yeah, not buying that."_ I said. " _I get how Coyote and I are connected and Sam and I are blood, but Oliver and Roy? C'mon. We're not that close that you'd be able to track them through us."_

He turned those piercing, almost glowing, blue eyes back on me. I took a step back without even thinking about it. _"Perhaps_ _you are unaware just how much blood you have lost back in the physical world. Blood links. There are pools of it around your bodies. I can use the blood to call to you. I cannot, however, send you along someone else's Spirit path."_

 _"Can't Coyote go?"_ Sam asked, _"That's sort of what Shamans do, right?"_

Brother Wolf sat down. I guess he felt that Oliver was under control, for now at least.

" _ **Shamans who are alive, healthy and prepared for the journey. Yes. Running Coyote is none of those. She could be lost forever if she began the journey and you will need her much more than you will need Roy Harper."**_

That got a low growl out of Oliver, " _I will not leave him behind!"_

And that's when the ground shook, for a second I thought it was an earthquake, until I realized the deep growling sound was coming from Brother Wolf, _**"You foolish human. What is the point of saving Roy Harper if you cannot stop the one who sent you here? I did not go through all of this to have you fail now."** _ He stood back up and towered over Oliver. Oliver backed down, dropped his eyes and stepped back, just like I had. I never thought I'd see Oliver give ground when it came to one of his crew, ever. " _ **You will sit, you will wait."**_ His eyes swept over all of us, and none of us could hold his gaze for more than a second. We all sat down. It felt completely wrong to challenge him. I'd never felt like this before. First Mariyn, now him? What the fuck was going on?

He sure as hell didn't sound like any of the rest of Coyote's guides I'd met. That's for damn sure. There was no give in him, no understanding. Coyote had said she'd never dealt much with him but I was getting the feeling there was a lot more to him than she knew. We sat there, without speaking a word, until a bobcat stumbled into view, eyes wide, scared to death and panting. Cats only pant when they're really stressed or seriously hurt. Roy wasn't bleeding but that didn't mean much here.

 ** _"Oliver, speak to him. He is nearly lost to us."_**

 _"Roy? Roy? Look at me. I know I don't look like me but it's me, Oliver."_

 _"Oliver?"_

He was shaking so much he could barely stand and his voice was so weak.

 _"Hey, I'm here too. It's Sam. You've seen Dean and I with fur before. C'mon Roy. You can do this. Think about Thea."_

 _"Thea..."_ He stretched out her name, like it was a foreign concept to him.

" _Yes, Thea."_ Oliver said _."My sister, your girlfriend. Think about her. Remember her, you have to."_

His breathing started to slow down, " _Thea...I love Thea..."_

" _That's it."_ I said, " _Think about how she looks, her laugh, her voice. How you met. It's all there Roy, you just have to find it."_ Sam and I had done this so often in the past that we knew all the tricks. " _Think about Oliver, fighting crime, being in the Impala with Sam. Remember man. You've got to."_

 _"Speedy..Thea...Arsenal..."_ The shaking settled down, his voice got stronger. " _I remember...Arrow..Oliver. Saved my life."_

 _"Yes, good, keep going."_ Oliver encouraged as he stood up and took a few steps closer. " _You're stronger than you think. I believe in you."_

Roy's eyes focused immediately, he stared in shock at Oliver, " _You do? I am?"_

If Oliver still hadn't told him that to his face after our talk over a year ago the first thing I was going to do when I had hands again was punch him.

" _Yes, I do and you are. You have to fight Roy, you have to live. We both do. We have people who love us to get back to. Understand?"_

Well, maybe slap him. At least he'd finally got that through his thick head.

Roy nodded, " _I do. Thea and Felicity, they need us."  
_

He sounded almost normal. Well normal for being in the form of a bobcat and talking without actually speaking. I'd take what I could get at this point.

Brother Wolf took a step closer and seemed to be examining Roy, he was giving him a pretty intense stare anyway. _**"Welcome Roy. I am glad you survived the journey."**_

 _"We're all here now. What's next?_ " I asked.

 _ **"Now I tell you what your enemy is and how you can destroy her."**_

About damn time.


	28. Who? What? When?

**_"Follow me,"_** he said and turned back to the bonfire. We walked down the hill and made a circle around the fire, Sam was to my right, Coyote to my left. We'd barely set our butts down when everything blurred for a second and we all looked like fully clothed humans again.

"A little warning would have been nice!" Oliver snapped. I had to agree. Roy jumped up, missed his footing and landed hard on the ground, Sam, Coyote and I took it all in stride. I looked at the human form of Brother Wolf. My earlier suspicions that there was more to him jumped up a few notches.

I've spent a year around Native Americans, while I'm sure there's variations from tribe to tribe and we were dealing with a Spirit guide here but his facial structure was off. He looked more European even with the dark skin and long black hair. I'd dismissed the blue eyes at first as just a sign of whatever supernatural power but something wasn't right. I looked at Coyote and saw some sort of hesitation in her face as well.

"I felt this would be more comfortable for all of you," he continued. His accent wasn't Lakota either, not that Great Coyote or Brother Crow had sounded Lakota, they'd sounded regular, like me. He didn't.

"It helps anyway," I replied. "We should probably get back before we're actually dead. So how about you tell us how to kill her?"

"Dean, you should know time runs differently in different worlds. We have more than enough time for what I must tell you and for you to attempt your resurrections."

Because that's encouraging. Roy and Oliver didn't take that too well. I guess they'd settled down enough to start actually understanding what was going on.

Brother Wolf looked away from us and stared into the fire. I got the feeling that this was going to be a damn long story. Usually I just rush past those, which worked so well with the Mark. I decided if he said we had enough time for this, we did, so I leaned against the medium sized boulder that was behind me and got comfy. That earned me a mildly surprised look from Sam. I replied with a shrug and focused back on Brother Wolf. I wasn't going to go traipsing through an unknown reality and screw myself over. I was pretty sure if my wolf was standing next to me he'd be giving me a look of doggy shock.

"Mariyn was the first werewolf," he said, "As you call them. She's eons old and was given the ability to shift as a gift from her patron."

"Gift?" Sam asked, "How exactly is that a gift?"

Brother Wolf gave him a completely neutral look, "Would you rather cover hundreds of miles of ice covered ground as a wolf or a human? She can run for days without stopping and her fur protects her from all weapons. When she needs to eat, she kills. No need to cook or carry supplies. Your enemies have no idea what you look like, you silently stalk them and can kill them in mere seconds without them even being aware you are there. Tell me Sam, is that not a gift?"

I leaned forward, "Wait, back up. All weapons? Even silver?"

He nodded and his face went from neutral to solemn, "Yes Dean. The only thing that can harm her is one of her own kind. Claws and teeth of her kin, that is all that will penetrate her fur."

Sam shook his head, "But we found records of hunters killing ones like her with silver?"

"I highly doubt they were like her. Just like all animals, there are different versions of what she is. Some look strikingly similar. Your weapons will not harm her or her pack."

"Okay, so we go back and rip her to shreds," I summed up, "Can't be that hard."

His eyes locked onto mine, "Tell Coyote you despise her."

I didn't even have a chance to fight it, I looked her right at her, "I despise you." Every inch of me rebelled against it, but I couldn't stop.

She hissed, stood up and faced him, "Who the hell are you? My Spirits would never do this! Nor could they."

The compulsion to do what he ordered left as fast as it had come. "Honey, I'm so sorry! That.."

She stopped me, "I know."

Sam's hand gripped my shoulder, "Dean? You okay?"

"Yeah," I got up and stepped closer to Brother Wolf, or whoever he was. "Talk and talk fast, you wouldn't be the first god we've taken down."

He merely shook his head, "The sheer bravado, it's breathtaking. Coyote. I am who I said I am, Brother Wolf. I never stated that this was the only name I have been known by. You are correct in that your Spirits could not have done what I just did to Dean. But then you are not linked to them as I am now to all of you."

I was starting to lose patience, "Just get to the punchline. Who are you really?"

"You were her patron, weren't you?" Sam asked.

He flexed his right fist, he really wasn't used to people getting in his face it seemed. "Yes."

Sam got that look, he was doing a full on brain search, "Wait, ice covered lands, wolves, her pale skin and blonde hair. But that can't be right, he wasn't a god..."

"Gods are highly overrated."

As we watched his hair went completely blonde and his skin paled to almost snow white. He stayed like that for an instant then the man disappeared and the wolf stood in front of us again. "This form is more comfortable for me." I have no idea how he was forming words but his jaw moved as he spoke. "It is my original one after all."

Oliver and Roy lunged to their feet and Coyote stepped back.

Sam nodded, "Fenris?"

The fact that Sam was more caught up in solving the mystery then everything else that was going on didn't surprise me. Oliver and Roy however were handling things as well.

"I...what?" Roy mumbled.

Oliver had resorted to his default intimidating glare. I know I've done that enough over my life. Never let them see you're freaking out.

"How is this possible?" Coyote asked, and she sounded shaky as hell. Oh no. I looked over my shoulder and really didn't like what I saw. She was trying to hide it but this had thrown her world into a tailspin. She'd had faith that Brother Wolf was her guide. She knew that there were many deities; we'd talked about it over the years but that's a bit different than having one admit to you that they'd shifted civilizations over the eons. Especially one that was currently holding you in some random limbo state. This would be why I don't have much faith anymore.

"Wait, wait, wait.." Sam said, "Did Ragnarok happen? How did you get out?"

"Ragnarok? Is that like Woodstock?" I knew what it was but I'm all about acting dumb.

"The Norse apocalypse," Sam replied with a scowl. He's such a great straight man to my act. We'd been talking Norse mythology a few months ago. He knew damn well I knew. Nice to know our teamwork was still in full effect.

"Did we miss one? Man! I thought I RSVP'd to that. Must have slipped my mind. Sorry Fenris. You got any good stories about it? Odin get drunk off his ass or something?"

Fenris' hackles were up but he wasn't growling, which I took to mean I was six inches away from death instead of two. Guess I've lost my touch.

"The tales very rarely match reality," Fenris replied. "That is all I will say in regards to your question Sam. Coyote, most of your guides you hold so dear belonged to another culture at some time or other. If we wish to survive, we adapt. As Sam and Dean can more than attest to, nothing is truly immortal. Not even the current creature that calls himself God. Time takes it's toll on all of us. Back to the matter at hand."

I had to give him credit, he was probably one of the more honorable old gods we'd come across. He wasn't killing people and eating them in his basement. Of course he wasn't really ever considered a god in the first place, he was Loki's son, but never credited as a god. Which raised quite a few questions that I'd probably never get to ask. "Okay, now that we know who you are, care to explain what's going on?"

"I gave Mairyn her gift, as I am sure you've already put together. She was once very dear to me. And no I will not go into details on that." His hackles dropped and even though I wasn't in furry form it was fairly obvious that however she'd gotten to Purgatory had involved him in some way and it still cut deep into him to think about it. "Humans should never be made nearly unkillable, we creatures that are actually cursed with relative immortality can barely stay sane and humans are much more fragile creatures. Your souls, your minds, they are not equipped to deal with the endless march of time. She strayed, became dark, violent. I had given her this gift, it was my responsibility..." He stopped talking.

Damn, I don't care who or what it is that has to kill someone they love, it hits me hard every time I hear about it.

"If I could, I would send her back again,' he continued, "But I cannot. There are reasons, complicated, involved reasons, none of which I should speak of. I cannot do what must be done, but I can help you." He met my gaze again and I saw the depths of his pain, his loss. "The reason I imposed my will upon you earlier Dean was to show the power of the pack bond. Without my aid, Mairyn's wish is your action. If you survive, you will be of her pack and the pack must act as one. She has twisted the sanctity of the pack bond, turned it into enslavement, not a thing of love and protection. The gift I gave her was meant to help her save her family, not turn her into a vile, heartless overlord. However, I gave her this gift, so technically I am dominant to her. I am trapped here though and I cannot reach the others. She has bound them too tightly to her. Without my physical presence in that realm I cannot break that bond. You, all of you, however are newly created." He swept his eyes across all of us, "My bond with you is much stronger than hers is at this moment. I can also hide that bond from her. When you reawaken I can keep her hold on you at bay for a short time, in that time you must act."

Sam and I looked at each other, neither of us liking the whole twist this had taken.

"Yeah, this whole binding thing," I said, "Not going to happen."

He took a step closer and I was face to muzzle with him. His shoulders were higher than my head and his face was nearly wide enough to be twice the size of mine. "It is not a choice you get to make Dean. It has already happened. The gift flows from me. If you weren't already bound to me I would not have been able to make you speak such a lie to your mate."

I really couldn't say anything to that.

"Uh, excuse me," Roy stammered. "Let's say we go back, we kill her. Then what? Are we like her? Monsters?"

Fenris almost recoiled like he'd been hit, "Monsters? Is that..." His lips curled. I really wasn't liking being this close to his teeth. "Yes, I can see how you would see it that way. The gift doesn't turn you into ravening beasts like those sad, half turned creatures I see images of in your minds. They're created from something entirely different. A curse, not a gift. Once you learn control, you and the wolf that arises within you are one. You are stronger, faster, able to survive all threats. The monster is not the wolf, the monster is the human. They are the ones who become warped."

Couldn't really argue with that either.

"But yes, it is permanent. You have two choices, rebirth as a wolf gifted human or death."

He turned away from me and sat back down. "What will it be?"


	29. Clarification

"How about you back up a bit?" Oliver said. "You said once we learn control we'll be fine but that the wolf is not the monster. Those two statements are contradictory. If we can't control it, then what?"

That was a pretty good catch. Course I'd already gotten the answer but I wanted to see if Fenris would fess up to the truth or not. He hesitated.

"You will explain, in detail, Fenris." Coyote ordered. Her tone got my attention, along with everyone else's. It held a power that I was used to hearing from Cas, not her. She was standing, a breeze stirring her hair and the air started feeling heavy. "I am not without power in this place, nor am I alone. Wouldn't you be as vulnerable to us as Mairyn is, since we share your "gift" now."

Not sure that was the best plan, Fenris started growling. "You threaten me? Stand down."

She flinched, every muscle in her face tightened as she started chanting. Sweat started beading on her forehead and her breaths came faster but she didn't sit. "No..." she whispered. I was so damn proud of her right then.

Fenris stopped growling, his huge ass head tilted to the left and for a second there he looked completely harmless. "Impressive. That won't be so easy for you back in the physical realm. I didn't take that into account. Be warned, if Mairyn senses any of that strength within you she will order her pack to attack you. I respect strength, so I shall answer you truthfully. If you do not learn to accept the wolf, it will destroy you Oliver. Not because it is a monster but because it is the epitome of a wild animal, if it is caged for too long it will destroy that which restrains it."

"What is this first hunt business?" I asked. "My inner self mentioned it."

Fenris directed his gaze back at me and Coyote slumped over. I took two steps to the left and braced her. "You all right?"

She nodded but didn't speak. Hopefully that whole thing didn't make it harder for her to get back.

"The change is painful," Fenris explained, "There was no way around that. The pain brings out the wolf. The first change is the worst. The quickest way to start the process of melding man and wolf is to immediately hunt, sate the hunger that arises because of the change. If you resist it, it will fester, like an infected wound. It will fight against the confines you place upon it."

"What if she has us hunt people?" Sam pointed out, "Then what?"

Fenris actually dropped his gaze at that point. "Then it is up to you. I can only keep Mairyn's bond with you at bay for two sunsets. If you haven't destroyed her by then, you will be hers." He looked at Coyote with some pretty serious admiration, "Or at least most of you will be. Perhaps you can protect them from her will. It is hard to say."

Sam frowned, "Any chance we'll be coherent enough to just take her out when we wake back up?"

Fenris shrugged, "Perhaps. But her whole pack will be with her and you have not moved as wolves or pack before. There will be a lot to adapt to as the change takes place."

"How many does she have and do you have any idea how the hell she got out of Purgatory?" I figured he might know.

"When I killed her, she had fifteen. I have no idea of how many she has now. The only reason I know she is out is because Great Coyote told me after Coyote spoke with her in a dream. I know what you know as far as that is concerned. I am sorry I do not know more."

I took a look at everyone. Sam, well looked like he always looks when we're up shit creek again with no good choices. Tough as nails, calm as could be and willing to do what it takes. Coyote was pretty much in the same place. Oliver had gone from default intimidation to thoughtful and Roy, well, he was trying. Of the five of us he was the one with the least experience to draw on for dealing with fucked up choices. "All right, thanks. Can we have a few minutes to talk?"

Not that I didn't trust him but, if nothing else, Roy was going to need some serious forewarning on how bad this could get. Fenris saying shit would hurt was one thing but I wanted him to hear it from Sam and I and I wanted to do whatever I could to get him to focus on making it through.

Fenris nodded, "Of course, time is running short however."

"Always is," I said.

Fenris ambled about thirty or forty feet away. He'd still hear everything of course, but it was the semblance of space that we needed. I caught Sam's eye and shifted my gaze to Roy, Sam nodded and moved a bit closer to Roy.

"Okay guys, where's everyone at on this?" I asked. "Either way it's going to suck. Hopefully we can figure something out when we get back to the other side to solve the whole werewolf thing."

"He said there was no cure." Roy said.

"Yeah, well that's what they said about being a demon, being cursed with the Mark of Cain or being dead." I pointed out. "Just because no one's found a way, doesn't mean there isn't one. That's the Winchester brothers motto."

"We can't let Mairyn live," Coyote straight up stated. "She will tear right though hunters. They have no way to deal with her or her pack."

Oliver's eyes moved to look at Fenris, "And we're trusting him why? How do we know this isn't just some drug induced trip or fuck up end of life thing?"

"For starters, historically that's never happened to Dean or I." Sam answered, "Shit like this is usually real, believe it or not. We tend to look at most things told to us by supernatural entities, no matter how insane it sounds, as at least fifty percent truth. Very rarely have they outright lied to us. Leaving out information is more their style, which is why I'm glad Coyote could push him. I get the feeling that he's on the level. He hasn't really threatened us or blustered like the ones that are hiding things tend to do. It couldn't have been easy for him to pull five spirits here, where ever here is. Usually when we're mostly dead we end up in more traditional places, so I'm willing to go with this being "real." What this really comes down to is are you guys willing to go through with it? Things like this, you have to have something that you can hold onto to keep yourself focused and fighting. Fenris was right about Dean and I never having to resurrect ourselves. Cas or Crowley usually did that for us, and the repercussions of that was hard enough to deal with. We're going in to this as blind as you all are. All we can tell you is that it will suck, it will forever change how you look at things and will scar you in some way or other. The choice is up to you."

"Won't be the first time I've pulled myself back from being mostly dead," Oliver said as he locked eyes with Sam then I. "I'm in."

He sounded more confident then he felt, couldn't really blame him though. I looked at Roy. His eyes went down the row as he looked at Sam, me, Coyote then turned his head to look at Oliver. "I, I guess so. It's better than staying here or being dead anyway."

That wasn't going to work. "Not good enough Roy. Do you want to live? Do you want to see Thea again, even if you're a werewolf and screwed up? Are you willing to deal with the shit that comes after? Because if you make it back, wake up and make it through the fight you won't be you anymore. Does living mean enough to you to go through all that, because, in the end, that's what it comes down to. Sam and I have had to make this choice so many fucking times. Yeah, we fought for each other, we fought to kill bad shit, but in the end, we fought to live and fix whatever came down the road at us afterwards." I stepped closer and leaned forward, "So, do you want to live?"

As I had talked, more and more of the fear left his eyes as he subconsciously squared his shoulders and stood up a bit taller. Slowly that confidence I had gotten used to seeing in his face seeped back in around the edges. He was dealing with it, dealing with the absolute insanity of our situation, pushing past it. Part of me was proud of him, the other part of me wanted him to just take the easy way out. I had no idea if we could fix the werewolf thing and was pulling my own confident act out of my ass. He didn't know that and I sure as hell wasn't going to leave him behind, even if I felt bad as hell for dragging him into this.

"Yes Dean, I do. Coyote's right, we can't let her live. She's a mon..." That stopped him.

"Remember Rick," Sam said, "He's technically a monster too but he's been fighting the good fight."

Roy barely nodded but he didn't let the fear take back over.

"All right then." I took a step back from Roy, "Fenris? We're good." I had a really unnerving thought, "Is she going to just straight up kill us of all five of us wake back up? I mean both you and her make it sound like the odds are pretty much against us."

Fenris walked back towards us with a wolfy grin on his face, "With confidence like yours Dean I think the odds have shifted." The grin faded, "She may, but if all of you make it she will have her hands filled with five newly born wolves that are hungry. Who knows? Maybe your distaste for her will make your first hunt be the hunt that sends her back."

Yeah, that wasn't really how I wanted to go into this, but he had a point. "Well, Sam's all about being efficient these days." Sam didn't even bother glaring at that one, he just ignored me.

"I will send you to the edge," Fenris continued, "I can hasten your journey. Once you get to the barrier, you must force your way through it. You will be on separate paths, I will do what I can to aid you but I cannot guarantee how successful that will be. When you arrive on the other side, you will change immediately. Let it happen. You will feel a connection to me, to each other and in part to her and her pack. The sooner you can sort through those the better because you will need to use me to block her hold over you. Are you ready?"

"Ready as we'll ever be." I answered for everyone.

"All right then. I will be with you." He closed his eyes and bowed his head. Everyone and everything disappeared, I was standing in a desolate, barren landscape that reminded me of the aftermath of a volcano. Black rock, no plants and no life. In front of me was a wall of ever shifting colors, it would have been beautiful if the air wasn't filled with screams and howls that sounded a lot like vengeful spirits as they disintegrate into flames when we'd burn their bones. I took a look around, hoping to see someone, anyone. There wasn't even a fly, "Oh yeah, this was so not a good idea." I said to no one in particular as I reached my hand towards the veil. "Well, here goes nothing."


	30. Veiled Lives

My hand erupted into pain, "Holy mother fucking hell!" I swore I'd just lost all my fingers and had to yank my hand back out to check. Fingers were all accounted for but my heart rate wasn't convinced, it was still sky high. "Jesus Christ! No way...there's no damn way." I was not up to reliving pain like that, not again. Barely five seconds of it was already ranking pretty damn high on the memories of being tortured list.

"It's not physical pain..." Fenris' voice drifted through my head.

"Neither was the thirty years in Hell, doesn't fucking matter. There has to be another way through this." I started thinking while I walked up and down the wall of color. No gaps, no alternate paths, nothing, just an endless black plain and the wall. "God I hate this alternate reality crap." I said to no one in particular. "Course now with the whole furry form thing...wait..." that triggered a thought. Coyote had managed to pull on something here to make Fenris back down, his comment about it being harder for her back on the physical plane stuck out to me. Would me being in a different form change how going through all this felt? Sure my Warrior Spirit is still me but it'd kind of been made clear that it and what Cas and the rest viewed as a soul were slightly different. I think. What if this was based off Western beliefs? Maybe my furry self wouldn't set off whatever it was that caused the pain. I mean, when Natives die I don't think they go to my version of Heaven, at least not according to Coyote. And I sure as hell hadn't seen ghosts do what Rising Dove's spirit had pulled off helping Coyote heal from the spirit sickness. Sure, I wasn't Native but maybe being linked with Coyote somehow would make a difference. Problem was I had no idea how to change form. Maybe figuring it out here would make it easier once I made it back.

"Clever.." Fenris murmured.

"Thanks. Any idea how I go about this?"

"Call it to you. Internally. Reach out...the wolf that arises once you return is not the same as this wolf but it will be good practice."

"Wait. It's not the same?"

"No. It is part of me..."

"That would have been handy to know. My head's going to be pretty damn crowded if that's the case."

"Indeed. Time is running out Dean. Do it or not. Make your choice."

"Got it." I took a deep breath, "Hey wolf, uh, inner me?" It took barely a second before I felt him. "How do I change to look like you, or become you, or..."

"Just focus on how you felt when we were walking to meet Fenris. Then sink into that memory and let me take over."

"Uh, okay." I put all other thoughts out of my head, as much as I could anyway, and remembered how much stronger the smells were, the feel of having four legs, the strength in my muscles, the way it felt like I could run for days, the feel of wind through fur...the...

"Good job," he said as I felt myself get shorter, my limbs change and shift. My eyes opened, I hadn't really told them to. I was a passenger in my own body, spirit, whatever.

"Dean," Fenris' said. "Well done, it will hurt immensely more in the physical world but you have an idea of what to expect now. Hurry."

I didn't order my legs to move, my wolf did. We jumped through the wall of color. I felt our skin shudder and he whimpered but I didn't feel any pain. "What the..."

"Discuss later..." the wolf told me, his voice tight. "I'm protecting us. Not easy. Shut up and give me free rein. I'll get us through this."

"Fenris...tell...others.." I managed to say before whatever the wolf was blocking started to bleed through to my awareness. Shit! How the hell was he even moving?

"Dean! FREE REIN! I NEED IT!" He ordered.

"Done!" I let go, surrendered. He snarled in defiance of the pain. I felt our paws shift, felt the retractable claws extend out, our shoulders shifted and I knew, just knew, that if I saw a reflection I would look like Mairyn and Fenris. I didn't fight it.

We were struggling through sheets of color. It was how you'd imagine being inside a rainbow would. Of course you'd have to add razor sharp knives inside the beams of light. Rainbow of Death, fun. My wolf didn't bother to try to dodge or protect himself. Once I let go and let him take over he threw our head back, howled and took off running. Hunger, the need to hunt, kill and protect surged through us, blotting out any other thought I might have. We were running on pure, basic instinct. We'd survive because there was no other option. We didn't care about saving others, all we cared about was making it through and destroying anything that stood in our way.

God damn it felt good. Easy, simple...I lost myself in him, in me, in...

Another slice, who the fuck cared. We couldn't be hurt...it was just pain...it was nothing. It was fuel...

We ran, it was so easy, so fluid. Four legs made so much more sense then two. Who needs hands when claws work just as well?

There was no path to follow, no roads, just layers of light. We'd made it through the red, the orange and yellow. Only a few more shades to go. We were about ready to burst into the green when the ground between us became fluid. We jumped, we should have cleared it but we somehow landed in the middle of a quick sand bog.

Our legs started churning faster and faster but the only direction we went was down...wait...quick sand...

"Hey slow down!" I told him and tried to wrench back control, fight against the instinctual panic, "Let go wolf! Let me handle this!"

It was so damn hard, the panic surged through us even more. That was not my wolf, he was smarter than this, I had to sort it out. I rooted around inside my head and pulled up memories, memories of people, of being human. "Wolf! Come on man, calm down." I shoved back against the panic, we were sinking way too fast. The sand was up to our neck and the rate we were churning we'd be muzzle deep in it within a few minutes. The green wall of light seemed to have gotten farther away. Something was screwing with me. I had to get control over something, so I went for something easier, something basic, breathing. I managed to wrestle control from the wolf and make our heart rate slow down, which will naturally calm something down. The fog of panic started to clear.

"Dean?" The wolf asked.

"Yeah. We got a little carried away. I think I need..." There was a shimmering at the edge of the bog, "Now what?"

And the last person I ever expected to see materialized out of thin air. Bobby. Baseball cap, plaid shirt, beat up jeans, beard. The whole nine yards. I was so shocked I forgot I was sinking to my death or whatever for a second.

He stared at me and frowned, "That's a new look for ya Dean."

What the hell? Do I shift back or what? He couldn't be real. There was a large stick laying next to him, that could probably help me get my ass out of this sand. I could probably reach it with my teeth if he slid it towards me. I wasn't sure if I shifted back to human form if I'd be able to stand the pain. Then it dawned on me that I was in between the color fields, which hopefully meant that if I shifted I wouldn't be cut to shreds.

"Well? You gonna to stand there panting or are we gonna talk?"

"Can I talk like this?" I asked my wolf. He didn't answer. On the bright side, if I shifted back I'd probably be taller which meant I'd have some more time before I sank to my death, or whatever the hell I had coming if I failed to get back. I repeated the process, except this time I focused on human me, not wolf me. Jesus Christ this was getting confusing. When I was finally on two legs, not four and thankfully clothed, perks of alternate realities I guess, I looked up at Bobby, "Yeah, not thinking you're really Bobby but we'll go with it. Care to help me out of this crap?"

He shrugged, "Not sure I should."

"Uh what?" Yeah, not the real Bobby.

"Remember when I was a ghost? What did I tell you?"

"Not really, been a bit crazy these last few years."

That all too familiar scowl appeared on his face, "Don't lie to me boy. I know damn well you know what I'm talking about."

I did, but I wasn't all that keen on the point he was trying to make. "That when it's our time to go, go."

"Exactly," he sat on the ground and stared at me. "Look at you. You go back, then what? You won't even be human anymore. How is that a good plan?"

"You know that whole line between human being good and monster being bad has sort of blurred over the years. I get back, kill the thing that's trying to kill off the hunters and figure out the rest. Same plan as always, nothing all that new."

He sat down and got way too serious, "Dean, think about it. You can end this on a good note, you've had a good run, had a great last year. Why risk that? What if no one else makes it back, you'll be this bitch's bitch."

I couldn't really argue that point, really. I mean, this last year had been better than I could ever hope to have. Sure if Coyote made it back and I didn't she'd be torn up but she was tough, she could handle it. I deserved a break, right? Someone else...

An entire ocean of survival instinct slammed into me, along with this urge to rip Bobby to shreds...

What the fuck?

"It is trying to stop you. Trick you into quitting." Fenris whispered. "You must push through. Survive..."

The thing that I thought was Bobby started to flicker. "Dean? Come on now son, you know I'm right. Don't do this..."

I pushed my right leg forward nice and slow so I wouldn't sink. The sand sucked and shifted around me but I didn't drop down any further. "You are not Bobby and whatever mojo you're trying to pull, it won't work. I've got plans, gave my word to someone and I won't let them down."

Bobby flickered again and disappeared, then the green wall of light came right at me. Fuck.

"MOVE FASTER!" My wolf shouted at me from inside my head.

"Shut up! I know!"

The wall of light tilted on it's axis and looked a whole lot like a blade stretching all the way across the sky. Not good. The damn sand was still pulling at me, I was running out of options here. "To hell with it!" I just started moving my legs as fast as I could, "Not getting stuck in this freakshow!" My stomach was fully covered with sand and it was hitting midway up my rib cage as the green blade of death thing flew at me. I managed to get close enough to lunge the last bit to the edge and duck down while throwing my arms out onto the shore.

"CHANGE!"

More advice from the wolf. I did as he said because I sure as fuck didn't want to feel my head get lopped off, plus he had claws. I shifted again and our claws dug deep into the ground. The green light hit and he howled in pained, I felt it too and my screams, although all internal, nearly deafened me. Inch by inch, we strained against the pain and the quicksand. We were not giving up. Not now, not ever. The more it hurt, the less I could think...

Survive! We must survive!...

Instincts overrode pain, overrode fear, overrode the smell of blood that rose around us. This had actually cut into our skin. It didn't matter. All that did was getting back...

The pain ended, our back legs were clear of the quicksand. We limped a few feet away and swayed, trying to catch our breath.

 _"Babe?" Coyote's voice, but how. "I love you..."_

 _Her scent filled our nose, soothing the pain, calming us. My mate, she would be waiting for me. So would my brother. Keep moving...keep moving._

Step by step, we drew closer to the next curtain of light. Two more left, blue and purple. Images clouded my mind, images of Felicity crying, laughing, of Thea telling me to give her her purse back, of fights in jungles, Amelia as I woke up next to her, Coyote's view from her cave. Places I had never been, things I had never seen.

"What's going on?"

"Pack..." Fenris' voice answered. "You are joining with your pack. I've never seen this happen, not this many at once. Do not falter now Dean."

I heard his voice echo to the others, addressing them in the same way. Then the visions of icy wastelands, of glowing beings, gods, ancient cities started to drown the rest out.

"Please tell me that's you Fenris, not her."

An ancient, alien strength flowed through me, conversations where I was speaking to Odin and Loki rushed through my mind, "Indeed. Pool your strength."

Four distant howls joined mine. The burning, biting pain vanished and my pack ran head on into the blue wall of color, unstoppable and forever bound together.


	31. Breakthrough

We hit the blue wall and the smell of burning fur made us gag. Pack is stronger than fire though, we pushed through it. All the memories that weren't mine crowded against me but underneath it all was the same core need, to make it past this last barrier and take out Mairyn and her pack.

As I stepped out of the color wall all the other memories faded, I felt the bonds though. I was standing on grass finally. "Let's finish this," I said and took two steps towards the last barrier when a shot rang out, slamming into my side and knocking me off my paws. I slid several feet along the grass thanks to the impact. My legs wouldn't move and instead of pain I just felt numb and increasingly cold. Not good.

"I can't let you." Dad's voice came from my right. "I told you to kill Sam to save him, you ignored me and did the unthinkable. I won't let my oldest son become a monster." I'd never heard him sound so cold, so empty. "I love you too much, I'm sorry."

I got rid of the fur, this was something that I had to be human to do. There was a pattern going on here. I wasn't all that surprised to hear him and it dawned me that I had a shit ton of things to say to him, even if it wasn't really him. Whatever it was that was trying to stop me was picking all the wrong shit to throw at me. Maybe if I hadn't had figured out the shifting thing I would have quit because of the pain, who knows. If I'd seen Dad two or three years ago in this scenario I may have agreed with him, not now. He wasn't the end all and be all of my life anymore, my role model. The last year with Coyote had taught me a few things about what love was and how jacked up my relationship with Dad had been.

"Fuck you Dad." I still couldn't move. He moved closer and I was staring straight into the barrel of the Colt. "You're so full of shit. Seriously. If you're going to kill me, go for it."

I saw it, the moment he decided. I didn't close my eyes or look away. He didn't say anything, just started to squeeze the trigger. That's when a white wolf with hazel eyes appeared from pretty much thin air, teeth bared, claws fully extended and completely silent. Sam landed on top of Dad, sending the shot wide of my head and the Colt flew out of Dad's hands as he screamed in pain. Sam's claws had sunk deep into Dad's back.

Sam turned his huge head towards me. I could see and feel the pain, the strain he was under and how little of the human side was in charge. There wasn't a lot of rational thought in Sam's eyes.

"Sam. Let him go. Thanks but this is on me." I had no idea how he'd even managed to join me. I thought we were all on separate paths. However he did it, it was taking a massive toll on him. I saw less and less of Sam and more and more of the wolf in his eyes. His wolf side was triggering mine, making it that much harder for me to stay human. "Go back to your path, finish up, break through. Save your strength for the next part. I'll see you on the other side. Promise."

There was so much anger pouring off of him and it was all bound up in our bond, not the pack bond that had just formed, our bond. Feeling how he felt about me was impossible to put into words. Yeah, we knew we loved each other, but having that surge through me along with his rage that I'd been attacked was hard as hell to fight against while staying calm enough to not join him in taking Dad out.

I dug down deep, found a thread of calm and rational thought to send back to him through the link. I didn't say anything, just kept my eyes locked onto his. The wolf side started fading, other emotions started showing in his stance and his eyes. He stepped back from Dad and faded away.

"Sam!" Had he died? I still felt him but it was a lot weaker.

 _"Still here..."_

He sounded exhausted. "Last one little brother, go. Get it over with. I'm good."

" _Sam? Dean?"_ Roy's voice barely came through _, "Here. Take what you need."_

A wave of energy and strength swept through me, I got my legs moving and passed the rest along to Sam. How Roy managed to have that much extra left to give away I had no idea, we were all pushing our limits. Made me respect him even more than I already did.

"Thanks Roy." I stood up and took a long look at Dad. He was wearing that old leather jacket, the one I'd taken from him, blood was pooling all around him. He was grimacing in pain and there was disbelief, fear, loss and more than a touch of disgust as he looked at me. "Don't have time to get into everything but for once, just once. You're going to listen to me. Yeah, I know this probably isn't the real you, don't care. God,I used to worship the ground you walked on, thought you were some bad ass hunter. I tried so damn hard to be like you, no matter what you did I backed you. Disowning Sam for going to school? I backed you, even told him the same lame ass lines about how he left us and how it was his job to reach out. I always covered for you with Sam, always. When you disappeared for weeks on end, came back late, whatever. I sucked it up, I was the good little soldier. I knew you loved us, you just were doing what was right going after Azazel. I trusted you, all the way, never doubted you, not once. Then you left to hunt that Woman in White, and didn't come back for a almost a whole god damn year!"

He winced, "Dean..."

"Shut up!" I snarled. That wolf side, Fenris' gift was rising up inside me, scratching to get out. I rode it out, being saddled with the Mark had some good points after all I guess. "Not only that, you cut us out of the loop, cut me out of the loop. You knew about Sam you son of a bitch,and you didn't have the damn guts to tell me! Telling me to kill my own brother to save him? Then up and selling your soul to the bastard that killed Mom? To top all that off you didn't leave a single damn thing for us to go on. Nothing! Not even the fucking Colt!"

I hadn't meant to but it felt good to slam my foot into his chest. "I can forgive a lot of shit Dad but that? Why? You could have let me go, killed Azazel and left with Sam. Mom's death would have been avenged, the Apocalypse would have been averted and I wouldn't have had to watch Sammy get possessed by fucking Lucifer and jump into Hell!"

"I didn't want to..." he gasped.

"Didn't want to want?" I cut him off, "Lose me? What the hell about Sam huh? You were more than willing to have me off him for you. I spent years acting like you after that, cutting him out, lying to him and he didn't deserve any of it. I did it because that's what you taught me, it was all I fucking knew. Yeah, I know you two made up before that wreck but did you mean a damn word you said to him? You couldn't even tell him to his face about the demon blood. You coward!"

I crouched down and grabbed the front of his jacket. "What I learned from you about being family, about love, about how to treat my brother, all of that was wrong. I'll never say you didn't love us, because I know deep down in there you did. What I will say is that your way is what brought me to the edge of being a real monster. This wolf shit? It ain't even close to how bad off I was. I followed your way, it led me straight to Hell, twice. You know who kept me from becoming a real monster? Sam. You know, the guy you told me to kill. Good thing I didn't listen to you back then. I don't live in your shadow anymore Dad. I'm not Dean Winchester who's greatest claim to fame is being John Winchester's kid. I've got my own life to live. I'm done living yours."

He didn't say a single thing, just kept bleeding. I looked around, "Who or whatever is running this show. I'm not fucking quitting. Been a nice trip down fucked up lane but I'm done. I've got crap to take care of."

I pulled my fur back on, just in case and took a step into the last wall of color...

Screams of agonizing pain filled the air. I smelled the damp air of the cave and every single bone in my body broke apart, shifted and started reforming all at once. I couldn't even scream, there was no way I could force out air past the intensity of what I was feeling. Coyote, Oliver, Roy and Sam's voices all blended and reverberated off the walls. If that wasn't enough the pack bond magnified it...

I couldn't hold on...couldn't fight Fenris' gift...

tendons snapping, reattaching, rib cage moving...

no...more...

I smelled my mate, my enemy and my pack. Blood, our blood...she would pay.

A new bond. Not filled with love. Filled with chains, imprisonment. My enemy, our enemy.

My mate's strength mixed with Fenris' defies her. Good. Enemies should not be pack.

Get to my feet, my brother is next to me. White furred, hungry, like me.

My mate brushes against me, she's silver grey and beautiful. Her muzzle is black, so are the tips of her ears. The rest is darker grey tips of fur with pale silver underneath.

Oliver, black like the night, blue eyes.

Roy, shades of brown and white. His face is white on the bottom, brown on top around his eyes. Like a mask. His back and tops of his legs are dark brown which fades to lighter brown then white on his stomach.

I look down. My paws are white. I twist my head to look at my back and tail, snowy white.

Our enemy is still in human form, her fear fills my muzzle. Hungry, so hungry.

 _"You must obey me!"_ Her voice in my head, all of our heads.

" _No we must not, bitch."_ My mate's answer, our answer.

Our enemy looks at my mate, " _Kill her."_ She orders her pack, tries to order me.

She must die.


	32. Base Instinct

" _Dean...come back, I need you to think, not just kill. As much as she deserves it."_ My mate's voice. Dean? Who's Dean? I am wolf, her mate, names are pointless.

Eight wolves, plus our enemy. Numbers mean nothing. Two of them attack. Good. The reddish one flies towards me, meet him midair, claws tearing into his flesh, blinding his left eye. Rip a chunk out of the other one's shoulder. She digs her claws into my side, no matter. Pack is stronger than pain.

" _Dean!"_

The blood tastes good, their flesh tastes even better. They are weak. Red rivers flow from the second one's throat, right into my mouth. Rip into her neck.

Roy slams into me, knocking me away from my meal, " _Dean! Help! Coyote needs you!"_

Coyote? Who...

Coyote! Shit! I had no control. The wolf side was so caught up in the kill it was ignoring the bonds for some reason. Mairyn had gone straight for Coyote, along with two other wolves. Somewhere in there she'd shifted back to wolf. I must have missed it while trying to have a wolf for lunch. Sam was just finishing off an enemy wolf but there was red streaks of blood staining his fur. Oliver was dripping blood from his back right leg and a huge gash in his chest, he was still fighting with a huge brown wolf and Roy was in the process of getting cornered by two others. He had hit me with his back leg as he tried to keep from getting pinned against a wall. He bunched his legs, jumped over the two wolves, rebounded off a low hanging part of the cave and landed behind Mairyn and her helpers. Once his paws were on solid ground he hamstrung one of the wolves that was trying to attack Coyote and jumped to the right. The wolf had seen all of it, he was just too damn hungry to care. I couldn't blame him, my, our, whatever, whole body had just been completely restructured in a matter of minutes. No wonder we were starving. I had to control this and fast.

I pulled on the bonds, mainly the one between Coyote and I. She'd somehow managed to stay rational, Roy was barely holding on, same with Sam and Oliver. Me losing it wasn't helping them at all, or her.

 _"I'm back guys, kind of. Give me a minute."_

 _"Hurry the hell up."_ Sam growled, literally. He was looking at me as he sent that thought and I got an up close look at his huge ass teeth.

I fought with the hunger. Coyote yelped and a slice of pain shot through our bond. Fuck this!

-Look bastard, I'm in charge here.- I told my wolf side.

-Hunt, kill.-

-You want our mate to die?-

-Mate die?-

This weird lust laced sorrow filtered through me. He was pure instinct, wolves mate for life. In his mind if she died, he wouldn't get laid ever again.

-Yeah. If we don't help her no more sex for any of us. Eat later, save her now.-

That got him focused. He pulled our mouth away from the dead wolf he'd been chowing down on.

-Look, let me handle this.- It felt like I could force control away from him but I remembered what Fenris' had said about accepting this other side. If I forced it, it would backfire and bad. I'd had enough of forcing things down until I snapped. Since the wolf side could think, it could be reasoned with. I wanted it to let me take over and help, not fight me. He surveyed the room and that's when he tuned into the pack bond again.

-Pack needs help!-

-Exactly, now let's work together.-

-Yes.-

And suddenly I was in the driver's seat of my body again. Not only was I in charge of the body, I got all the knowledge on how to fight like a wolf, how to move and react to attacks. I also felt a dull pain in my left side, I'd gotten tagged by something but I knew it wasn't life threatening.

" _Let's finish this."_ I told the rest of them.

 _"Finally!"_ Sam snapped. _"Was getting worried."_

Oliver had taken out the one he'd been fighting. He'd gotten on top of it and pretty much ripped it's heart out with his claws. That left five.

Roy had jumped again and a grey enemy wolf reached up, hooked it's claws into Roy's leg and brought him crashing to the ground.

 _"No!"_ Oliver hissed and went ballistic. He moved so fast all that registered was the blood and guts flying as he tore into the grey wolf.

 _"Dean!"_ Coyote's thought almost made me black out, it was that strong. I saw her strike out at Mariyn, who got her teeth into Coyote's leg and shredded it all to hell.

All the sides of me came together as I launched myself straight for the back of Mariyn's neck. Sam cleared my path by shattering the back legs and hips of the wolf that was between Mariyn and I. I barely noticed it's howls of pain, I was too focused on taking out the bitch that had hurt Coyote.

Unfortunately my growling let Mariyn know I was coming, she spun around faster than I expected. Her right paw nailed me in the face, ripping my cheek and muzzle while narrowly missing my eye.

The pain brought the wolf side raging back up. I held on, pushed through it and hooked my paw around her right leg to try to trip her up so I could get on top of her and dig into her belly. She kept her balance, barely. I could see her confusion. She had no idea how we were resisting her bond and managing to not go completely feral. Coyote took advantage of her spinning around to attack me and made a move for her back legs but Mariyn knew that was coming. She side hopped out of Coyote's reach, realized she was outnumbered and bad so took the only real option left to her. She tucked tail and ran. I bolted after her, Sam was right next to me.

" _Wait!"_ Coyote said.

" _Stay there. Your leg is shredded, so is Roy's. Oliver, guard them."_

An intense desire to argue with me came back up the link from Coyote. " _We need information! Remember the portal to Purgatory? Don't kill her!"_

 _"Not letting her go."_ I sent back, but I found myself slowing down. What the hell?

-Kill now?- The wolf whispered in the back of my head.

-Kil...wait...-

 _"Kill now."_ That was Sam's voice, but not quite. He surged ahead of me, blood spurting out from a wound in his leg and side each step he took. The first hunt, this was it. Sam had held on before, but with Mariyn running he'd gone feral on me. He caught up to Mariyn and threw his paw out in an attempt to trip her as she ran. She stumbled and Sam plowed into her. They rolled over the top of each other for several feet until Sam hit a tree, which didn't even phase him. High pitched barks and sounds erupted from them as they wrestled each other.

" _Sam! Don't kill her!"_ I ordered. I saw the thought register with him because he paused for the briefest of seconds. Mairyn took advantage of that and went for his throat, her jaws wrapped around his fur just as he pulled back. Blood started gushing.

-Kill now!-

My brother swayed. She must die.

 _"Do not kill her!"_ Mate _'_ s voice. Can't refuse mate.

" _Dean! Sam! Stay with me. Please."_

Enemy, Mariyn...Coyote...

Mairyn twisted out from under Sam and took off, limping, but running as fast as she could.

-Chase!-

-No! Sam's bleeding, needs us. We'll get her later.-

It was so hard not to chase her as Sam crumpled to the ground. I needed hands. I forced myself to go through that hellish pain again so I could change back into human form. A few minutes later I was standing naked and sweating next to Sam.

"No, no...c'mon. Not now!" I pushed through his fur to try to judge how deep the wound was. He snarled and snapped at me, catching my forearm with his incisors and drawing a decent amount of blood. "Sam! It's me!" He was so far gone but too weak to actually move much. Coyote, still in wolf form, limped up next to me.

" _Let me try something."_

Now that we weren't in the middle of a battle I began to notice some rather interesting things with the pack bond. When my wolfie half had said he couldn't refuse his mate I wasn't sure what that referred to. Now I did. Coyote had managed to help pull us all back from the edge while staying sane. Mariyn had gone after her and it was Coyote that had kept Mariyn at bay. I tried looking her directly in the eyes, I almost couldn't pull it off. This was going to get damn awkward. I'd deal with that later.

" _Sam...listen to my voice, use it..."_ She repeated a few times. He started to calm down. The blood flow was slowing down pretty damn fast since his skin had started healing already. Damn we heal fast. Coyote was pouring a crap ton of energy and strength at him too.

" _Coyote?"_ Sam whispered.

" _Yes, that was a bit too close for comfort."_

 _"We needed her.."_

 _"We have the other ones back at the cave. They'll talk."_

 _"What? How? She owns them,"_ he pointed out.

" _Not anymore._ _Pack bonds are interesting things it seems. We'll deal with her later. Promise."_ She looked at me, " _Never realized how white your ass was until now. It's kind of blinding actually."_

"Oh shut up. Sam? Are you able to walk back? I shifted because I thought I might have to carry you, didn't realize how fast we healed."

He stood up, " _I think I'm good."_

"All right, let's get back and talk to these guys."

" _Uh Dean," Sam said. "You do realize our clothes are shredded, right? You going to stay like that or put fur back on?"_

"Oh man, I don't want to go through that again!"

" _I don't mind if you stay like that._ " Coyote stated and I could hear her laugh.

"Well I do. This sucks!" I put myself through the whole painful ass process again. I was beyond starving, we all were but with Coyote and the rest of the pack rational I could put a lid on it for now. The three of us padded back to the cave. Coyote's limp was almost gone by the time we made it back. There were some serious upsides to this, especially for hunters.


	33. History Lessons

We made it back into the cave, first thing that hit me was the smell. Blood. My blood, Sam's blood, Coyote's, Oliver's, Roy's. The stench, thanks to the wolf senses, was having the unnerving effect of being both sickening and making my mouth water because of how hungry I was.

There was just so damn much of it, Mairyn's pack had gone to town on our human forms. I understood Fenris' comment about using our blood to link us together. My paws were sticky with it, the cave floor looked like a serial killer's modern art piece since we'd been fighting in it. Streaks, puddles and blotches covered the floor. If it wasn't for Fenris' gift, all of us would be dead. There was no way around that.

Roy whimpered and Oliver felt pretty shaky through the pack bond. I looked over at Roy, his ears were down and his tail low, not in the about to attack kind of way but in the scared shitless way. Sam padded over and leaned against him. For some reason Sam was a lot more comfortable with the physical part of this, wolves being more into physical displays of affection than most people. Oliver was standing pretty stiffly. He didn't seem to be leaking blood anymore, it was the reality of the situation that was causing the problem. The whole standing in pools of their own blood and by all rights should be dead part reality, it's never an easy one to deal with.

Lined up along the wall, laying down, with their heads resting on their paws, were the remaining living wolves from Mairyn's pack. There were four left, a grey one, a light brown one, a reddish brown one and one that was black and silver. I could see dried blood where they'd been injured but they didn't seem to be bleeding at all now. The black and silver one was positioned oddly. Then I remembered that was the one Sam had plowed through to clear my path so I could go after Mairyn. It, or rather he, was panting and seemed to be in a lot of pain. I could faintly hear bones shifting and healing under his skin. That sound made my skin crawl, it just wasn't normal.

None of them seemed all that keen on attacking or getting revenge for us going after Mariyn. There was a story here, had to be. I was about to start asking questions when Coyote stepped forward and I found myself giving in to her taking the lead. The four wolves offered their throats up to her and closed their eyes.

" _What the hell?"_

 _"She is Alpha,"_ The black and silver one answered, I didn't think he could hear me. Guess I was wrong. " _She is more dominant than Mairyn. She decides our fate."_

It's a good thing I'm a pretty secure guy. Coyote didn't say anything, at least with words, her tail did wag a few times though. I decided to withhold remarks until after the question and answer session. Sam shot me a wolfy smile over Roy's back. Jerk. On the bright side, that comment seemed to help even Oliver's mood out and Roy felt a little less panicky. Tonight was going to be filled with interesting conversations, that I was sure of. I stepped back and let Coyote handle things, it was kind of nice actually. I just had to stand there and look mildly scary, that was easy enough.

" _Now that we're all here,"_ She started out _, "How about you tell me your names and what exactly is going on here? How can you hear us? You're not part of this pack._ "

The black and silver one opened his eyes. They were golden yellow and he carried a lot of years on his shoulders. It was sort of the same feel I got when I'd chatted with Death or Cas, ageless, immortal. " _Fenris' gift binds us all together. There's never been that many of us. I am Audun, the light brown wolf is Raelyn, the reddish one is Dabria and the grey one is Einar. Raelyn and Einar are brother and sister to Mairyn, myself and Dabria were reborn many years after they were."_

 _"How old are you?"_ Sam asked.

" _That is a rather complicated_ _question_." Audun said as he sat up on his haunches. " _Do you wish to know how old we were when we died or when we were first created? Seeing as how we are alive again I am not sure if we should count the current time or not?"_

 _"Good point."_ Sam replied, _"Time runs differently in Purgatory too. How about when you were originally born, human, not wolf."_

Audun nodded, " _Around_ _the end of Charlemagne's war against the Saxons. We did not keep calendars back then. Mairyn and her family are older than I though."_

Roy's jaw dropped _, "That's almost two thousand years ago!"_

 _"Yes. I was killed by some hunters in the early twelve hundreds."_ Audun continued.

 _"How?"_ I asked, _"Fenris said that only other wolves can kill you, or I guess us now._

 _"Drowned. We still need to breathe air. They tied me up with heavy chains and threw me into a lake. Raelyn was caught by some Inquisitors and also drowned. Dabria and Einar were killed in a landslide. Crushed. We may be immune to weapons but we are not unkillable."_

 _"_ _Good to know. How exactly did you get out of Purgatory?"_ I really wanted to confirm what we'd heard about Reapers and humans. I was pretty sure Gordon hadn't been lying but since these wolves had no grudge against us, I figured they'd be neutral parties and give us the real story as to what was going on. If they knew it.

" _You are Dean, correct?"_ Audun asked.

" _Yeah."_

He nodded, " _I thought so. Gordon described you and your brother. May I explain how Purgatory works first before answering Alpha?"_

 _"Sure,"_ Coyote answered, " _Although I don't understand why you need to ask."_

 _"Because it is an indirect answer. If I may also explain something about how packs work,"_ He paused. Coyote nodded _. "You will start feeling it soon enough I imagine. She,"_ he pointed his paw at Coyote, _"is Alpha, I can feel Fenris very strongly coming from her as well. You, Sam and you Dean, will rank close to each other. I would say Sam will rank slightly higher, although with Dean and the Alpha being mates, that brings Dean almost equal to the Alpha. The black one with blue eyes will be next and that leaves the one Sam is assisting at the bottom of the structure. Your wolf sides will start responding to and requiring structure within the pack fairly soon. Of the four of us here,"_ he waved his paw at the wolves next to him, " _I am the most dominant, then Raelyn, Einar and Dabria. I sense that I and your black wolf will be close to the same rank. The rest will be lower ranking. I am not sure if you, Alpha, outrank Mairyn because Fenris is guiding you or if you are that strong on your own. Either way, when a more dominant wolf asks a question, it is expected that the question is answered immediately. Dean asked a question, Dean is more dominant than I, therefore I had to ask permission to answer indirectly. It keeps from triggering the wolf side into a dominance battle if we ask instead of assume. Especially with wolves we don't know. There may not have been that many of us but there was still conflict until we figured all these behaviors out."_

 _"That seems rather highly regimented,"_ Oliver said, " _Are we to assume then that a pack is pretty much a dictatorship."_

Audun dropped his eyes and we all heard his soft growl. " _Yes and no. The Alpha is responsible for caring for the pack, his or her word will be law in the end. However Alpha's can be challenged, by one that is strong enough. Unfortunately, when Mairyn lost her way she killed any one who could challenge her. The ones that remained, we could not resist her. For years we were forced to do her bidding, right or wrong. Then Fenris freed us by killing her. We broke into smaller packs but with no truly strong Alpha left there was chaos. You see, Alphas help the others control the wolf side. Weaker, less dominant wolves have less control. It was bad enough Mairyn was having us hunt things we should not be, but after she was gone, resisting the hunt was that much harder. Wolves started slaughtering humans by the village full, drawing attention to us, making it harder for us to resist being wolves. When we are threatened or hurt the wolf side tries to protect us and take control. Over time we died, one by one."_

Everything about him, the lowered eyes and ears, the dropped head, every inch of him showed how much loss he'd been through, same with the other three.

 _"Purgatory is nothing but being threatened. You fight every minute, there is strength in numbers as Dean knows. When we managed to find pack again we came together. There are no innocents in Purgatory. I don't think any of us have resumed human form since we died until Mariyn brought us here. Claws and fangs are deadlier there than weapons. When the angel pulled the Leviathans out of Purgatory all the monsters took notice. The Leviathans are the strongest beings down there. They had been ruling Purgatory, as much as it can be. Once they were gone things became confused. Then they returned as mysteriously as they had left and they were enraged. We heard them speak of an angel and a human in Purgatory then that portal opened. The Leviathans were on a killing spree, most of the monsters started looking for Dean. Shortly after Dean escaped Purgatory angels invaded, laid waste to the place, pulled the angel out and in doing so threw everything into chaos. All the monsters wanted out, that portal was there, mocking us. One day Gordon, undead filth that he is, approached Mairyn."_

Audun's hackles were sky high and all of them snarled at the sound of Gordon's name. Guess he was even less popular with the monsters than he was with us. Shocking.

" _Mairyn had become even more twisted in Purgatory, the killing, she yearns for it. She didn't start out that way. She hates humans and despises Fenris because she feels he chose humans over her when he killed her. Her story is long and complex but believe me when I tell you that this pack was formed out of love, not what you see of us now. Gordon played upon her need for revenge over the humans, promised her that he would help her destroy the hunters that would be her only true threat. He explained his plan of getting monsters to work together, how we could escape Purgatory. He had somehow discovered the ritual Dean had used to escape and got in touch with some rogue Reapers. It took many humans to get the pack and the vampires that Gordon had convinced to join him out. Much of the pack had become twisted like Mariyn, some of us hadn't but we couldn't break from the ranks. Not until you came. By fighting Mairyn, being more powerful, you have broken the pack bonds enough that we can leave her. You can either accept us into your pack, kill us or let us form our own pack."_

And that's when things got all twisted up. By all rights we should kill these four, problem was that a pretty serious surge of protectiveness came from Coyote backed by Fenris, these were his people after all. I got the feeling that the Alpha urge to protect things was starting to assert itself. That wasn't all though, they knew everything about Mariyn and it sounded like they'd have to answer every single thing Coyote asked.

Audun seemed to pick up on our dilemma and looked at the other three. They all looked away from him, but there was more to it than that. They were scared and not of us. _"You came here to eliminate a threat to hunters, your friends. Yet the wolf side wishes to protect us since we are defenseless. To be honest Alpha, this world is overwhelming. All the smells, the amount of humans, the sounds, the lack of open spaces to run. We are not of this time, this place. If you do not wish to make us pack, then we will tell you about Mariyn and you can send us back to Purgatory. I am not dominant enough to keep the four of us from turning into ravaging beasts. None of us wish to become that. In Purgatory, if we lose control, there is no harm in it. Here, there will be."_

 _"What about us turning into beasts?"_ Roy asked. " _Oliver and I don't live with Dean and Coyote, the Alpha."_

Audun shrugged, " _You are of this time, perhaps you can resist. The wolf needs to protect, to mate and to feed. This time, this place, everything about it seems a threat to us, and there are so many people, so many scents. The wolf responds to danger, to stimulation. That is all I can say."_

And all of our lives are so calm and peaceful. Great.


	34. Ticking Clocks

None of us said anything at first. Then Coyote broke the silence, " _Can we trust you to not lie or deceive us in your answers about Mairyn and the plan to kill hunters? Honestly, this whole switch of allegiances just feels wrong to me, although I can feel the wolf part is fine with it."_

All four of them nodded, " _Mairyn abused her position as pack leader, we only followed her because we had no other choice,"_ Einar stated.

 _"Okay but if we send you back to Purgatory, you'll be right there with her again. We will kill her,"_ I pointed out.

" _Perhaps not,"_ Audun said. _"It is a big place and if we stay away from her we won't be forced into her pack again. We have a chance now because you freed us from the bonds. That is more than we have had in centuries. We were once honorable humans and tried to be honorable wolves. We used to hunt animals, not humans. This gift from Fenris was to be used to help us survive not to destroy others. We remember that even if she does not."_

We all felt that there wasn't any lie to what either of them said. They didn't seem to hate her, but they sure as hell didn't want to be around her. I guess since they knew how she was before they could forgive her.

" _We want to stop her, stop the vampires and other things that escaped along with us,"_ Raelyn added, her thought was so soft I barely heard it. " _When we were alive we avoided the bringers of death, the cursed, the inhuman. Even in Purgatory we would keep our distance, until Gordon and that portal. We have all been tainted by what Mairyn has done, we wish to in some way negate that taint."_

Coyote looked at the rest of us, none of us said a word. We all knew where the wolves were coming from. She looked back at the four of them, _"How many are left? Where is she going? What was the next step?"_

Audun nodded, " _Four other wolves, made last year. She will return to the staging area. The next step was to find a way to draw out the group of hunters that you sent away after you killed Gordon. She assumed, incorrectly, that only one or two of you would survive the rebirth, she would claim you and you would be forced to betray your friends_."

I almost didn't catch the rest after that first statement, _"You said made last year? How long have you been out?"_

 _"Close to two years."_

Sam and I just stared at each other, this was so not good.

" _Our bones were in different places, as you can imagine."_ Audun continued, " _So it took several months to gather together. Mairyn went first,then she would go to roughly where we thought our bones would be, send a Reaper with a human to us in Purgatory, we would do the spell, join her then move to the next spot. I do not know what the Reapers were getting out of this exchange but they seemed content to help. Once we were all together she and Gordon recruited monsters who were here and a few others came through from Purgatory to help as well. We fed carefully to not attract attention. Gordon trained us on how to hunt you and gather information as to your whereabouts. She turned a few new people along the way to gain knowledge quicker on how this world worked. Some were hunters that you know, not well from the information we gathered but they knew enough. We were aware of your...what is it called? That system you use.."_

 _"Email?"_ Sam asked.

Double down on this shit not being good at all. We were going to have to track down and kill every single thing that had been involved in this. There was just no way around it. The entire pack bond was vibrating with how jacked up this was. We all knew it, feeling it magnified through everyone else's brains wasn't the least bit helpful either.

" _Yes. Email. We had no direct knowledge of it though. The hunters we turned weren't really that involved. They just knew it existed."_

That made it a little better, but not by much.

" _How many monsters are helping?"_ Coyote pressed.

 _"Maybe another thirty or forty. Not that many. Most were too scared of Sam and Dean to join. I now understand why."_

Somewhere between the words thirty and forty Sam and I both started growling.

-Hunt?- It wanted out.

-Hunt...soon...- I had to force the word soon out. They'd been here for two years, spying on us, learning - they could have taken Coyote out, Sam, Gerald, Roy...

-Threat. Must protect.- It wasn't just the hunger. Audun and the others looked away from Sam and I, showing us their throats.

" _Settle down! Please!"_ Coyote's voice was strained, beyond strained. I felt it rising within her too. Scraping at the bond, trying to get out, to bring death, shred, rip, tear, end all threats and protect all of us.

Oliver stepped in between us and the other wolves, he tried to stare Sam and I down but the pack rank wouldn't let him so he averted his eyes and started talking, " _Dean, Sam. I never truly understood what you had been through until now. I've caught glimpses of it since that green wall, and this, what's happening now, I'm still trying to catch up, to process, but you need to focus. Remember what Fenris said, how long we have before he can't help us any longer. We need to stay sane enough to kill her. The rest of monsters we can hunt down later, or the other hunters can. Mairyn and her remaining pack are the true threats, not the monsters they recruited. They can be killed with the weapons we have, she can't. Please, if you two give in the rest of will lose it as well."_

 _"Dean..."_ Sam's snarling voice, " _Every step in rebuilding an engine. Tell me."_

The answers came from the rational part of my mind and they came fast. As I listed them off, down to timing specifications for Baby's engine the wolf in both of us receded bit by bit. Once we started calming down Coyote's strain faded as well. Oliver's whole body had been tense from the moment he stepped in front of us. He was technically challenging the top three members of the pack, but he'd had to do it and it saved all of us in the end.

 _"Thanks,"_ Sam said.

Oliver walked back to where he'd been standing, " _Sure thing. Now let's find out where she is, take her and the rest of them out and go from there. Strategically speaking we could probably track her on our own now that we have these heightened senses. There is five of them left though so it could get dicey. Coyote, do you have any idea how to blend Audun and the rest with us? Personally I don't feel all that comfortable taking any of them with us, but I can't deny the whole dominance thing that seems to be coming into play here. We could use the boost in numbers."_

 _"I won't force them to kill her,"_ Coyote replied, " _That's what she did._ _I'm sorry but we can't leave you alive,"_ She added. " _We have pushed a lot of boundaries with the hunters already, plus the fact that we are technically monsters ourselves now. I can't take more risks, I have to protect us."_ She put a lot more force and power into her words _. "Tell us where she is."_ I could tell she was fighting hard against the need to protect them. The wolf side saw them as possible packmates now that they weren't threatening us. It was pretty black and white about things.

 _"The four wolves you killed,"_ Audun said without any hesitation at all. " _They were some of the strongest in the pack. The ones that are left are much weaker. When they come against you it is possible that you may be able to pull them from her without much of a fight. The ones that were loyal to her are dead now. The staging area is six miles north, northwest of here. There is an abandoned cabin at the end of a river. The rate we run, you should make it in about thirty minutes if you go full speed. You will be able to scent her for several hours since she was bleeding."_ He rolled over onto his back, stretched his neck out completely and the other three followed suit. " _I understand why you do not trust us. I would have the same feelings if I was in your position Alpha. Your pack needs all it's strength and no distractions from us. Send us back, pack should die together. Thank you for not forcing us to kill. Use our bodies to feed your wolves. We will no longer need them. Please make sure we can never return to this time again, that way we cannot be forced to kill more innocents."_

This went against the way all of us did things. We didn't take out people, or monsters, who were surrendering and defenseless. They just laid there. This was cold killing, killing I didn't want to do, I'd done enough of it. Roy felt sick to his stomach from what I could tell and Sam was in basically the same place as me. Oliver was trying to summon up the desire to do it and Coyote, I could feel her start unraveling. She'd been so strong but between the wolf side telling her to protect, the fact that she'd never killed something in cold blood and the sorrow that was coming from Fenris she was reaching the end of what she could handle.

Audun and Einar looked up at us and sat up. Audun forced his eyes to meet Coyote's then he snarled," _Let us help you, help us."_

Next thing I knew he and Einar were flying through the air straight at Coyote.

-Protect!-

I let go, I had to.

The wolf took over. My claws sliced through Audun's throat before he got within striking distance. He didn't make a sound as he hit the ground. Hunger flooded my mind, shoving away any disgust at the feel of my fangs ripping a gaping hole into his chest, snapping through ribs and finally devouring his heart.


	35. The First Hunt

When I'd let go I'd taken Sam with me, Coyote couldn't pull us back and once she gave in to her wolf side the rest of them got swept along with us. The other wolves barely made a sound as we massacred them. Fresh blood flowed across the already sticky with blood floor, the cracking of bones and shredding of tendons filled the caves.

Roy and Oliver were making short work of Raelyn's body. I had Audun, Sam had taken down Einar leaving Dabria for Coyote. Even though the hunger and the wolf were in charge I was still managing to stay aware enough to keep track of what was going on and think. Fenris had said that the wolf and human had to figure out how to work side by side. I'd let go for a few reasons. One, I was starving and I knew from dealing with the Mark that the longer I let shit like this go, the worse it'd be for everyone. Two, Coyote was right, we couldn't risk Mairyn taking them back over and turning them against us. Three, Benny. He hadn't come to me to kill him but when I'd sent him back to get Sam he'd been damn grateful. Monsters in Purgatory had no reason to hold back, to try to not kill. Getting shoved back up here and trying to learn control again, damn near impossible. I hadn't been a monster but it'd taken me months to not want to attack anything that moved funny. These wolves had been down there for centuries. There was no way in hell they'd make it a month without a strong influence keeping them in check and we'd just end up in the same place but with more bodies on the pile. More lives lost.

So even though it felt wrong, we were doing the right thing in the end. Not that it made it any easier for me to accept the fact that I was eating a wolf, raw and gaining a whole new appreciation for the phrase "wolfing it down." It couldn't have been more than fifteen minutes before Audun was pretty much just skin and bones. I'd eaten all the organs, chowed down most of the meat and muscle and was starting on gnawing at the bones to get at the marrow. My stomach felt like it was going to burst as the hunger eased off.

The rest of them, except Sam, were starting to slow down too. Sam was in the middle of ripping Einar's back leg clean off when I got enough control back to send him a thought. Coyote, Oliver and Roy's wolves were starting to fade from the forefront, I could sense it through the bonds. Sam's however, wasn't.

I took a step closer to him, " _Sam? Come back man, come on."_

All I got in reply was lowered ears and a snarl as the leg came free and his jaws crunched through the bones like twigs. Not good. My cell phone rang, Sam's head snapped up at the sound. Our clothes were in shreds, but I'd invested in one of those indestructible cases once I'd started wrenching and wasn't going through burner phones every other week. It rang again, Sam let the leg drop from his jaws and started stalking towards the sound.

I got in front of him. _"Sam! Come on!"_

Coyote's personality came back online, _"Oh god, I just ate..."_

Shit, she'd hit her limit. Then a wave of nausea hit me as Roy finally came all the way back too.

" _Raw? I ate...no..."_ Hacking sounds came from behind me.

The phone rang again, Sam blinked twice and cocked his head to one side. I felt him fighting for control. " _Phone?"_

 _"Yeah, don't kill it."_ It rang again then went to voice mail. " _You good?"_

He nodded, " _Think so."_ Then he looked over his shoulder, as if he just remembered what he'd been doing. _"Would be doing better if we got the hell out of here."_ He wasn't getting sick to his stomach like Roy, but he wasn't all that thrilled with seeing the carnage.

Oliver was rock solid, " _We need to move. Now."_ He knew, like I did, that the longer we stayed here the more it'd hit home. We had to finish the job first, then fall to pieces.

I stepped closer to Coyote and brushed my face along hers. " _Just a little longer honey, hold together a bit longer."_ I knew if I got her stable, it would help all of us. She leaned hard against me, closed her eyes and I heard her chanting in my head. As she chanted the pack bond was flooded with this otherworldly sense of calm and peace. That sure as hell wasn't Fenris.

" _Looks like you still got it darlin', even if you are furry,"_ I told her.

" _I...I guess so."_ There was more than a little relief in her voice. " _Hopefully running won't make us puke all that back up,"_ she said as she turned to head out of the cave.

" _Yeah. North-northwest, let's move. Roy? You going to make it?"_ If he had skin instead of fur he'd probably be green and about ready to run to the sink to puke, because that's how he felt, but he pulled his eyes away from the corpses and started walking out.

 _"I'll be fine."_

He staggered a step or two, Oliver caught up to him and braced him. They walked a few more steps and Roy got more solid on his paws as they got closer to the cave opening. Sam and I looked at each other for a second, then he joined the other three. I scanned the cave one more time. We'd have to come back for our phones and who the hell knew where our weapons were, but after that, we'd be torching this place. As soon as we got done with Mariyn I was going to have Sam tell everyone that from now on, anything you kill, you burn. If we didn't it just be an endless stream of resurrected monsters coming after hunters. First things first, kill the relatively unkillable wolves. Deal with the rest later.

The outside air was a relief, I took a few deep breaths to get the smell of blood and bile out of my muzzle.

Coyote was sniffing the air in different directions, " _I smell her to the north. Let's go."_

We took off running. Now I'm not one for running, hell exercising in general, but man did it feel good to just go flat out. Running on four legs seemed to take no effort at all. Oliver, who's pretty quick on two legs, ranged out ahead of us. Sam lengthened his stride and caught up. There was something about the sight of two huge wolves, one pure white, one deep black running all out side by side. Roy and Coyote trailed behind them and I took up the rear, keeping my eyes open for enemy wolves. It didn't take long for me to decide it was probably a good thing that we'd just binged on wolves for lunch. I smelled deer, rabbits and other small critters that if we were still hungry we probably would have gone after and gotten completely sidetracked from what we had to do.

Oliver stopped, sniffed a few times, changed course and bolted, " _It's this way!"_

The wind shifted and we all caught the same scent he just had, vampires and Mairyn. I'd never noticed vampires smelling a certain way before, but with the wolf nose I was surprised I'd missed it all these years. I guess I hadn't really missed it because as soon as I smelled it I knew what it was. It wasn't the smell of rot, it was more the smell of old blood, old people and a weird mustiness, like when you first open up the attic in an old house. Dust, mold and stale air.

The smells got stronger, which got all of us moving even faster. Our wolf sides started pushing against us but we were too in control. Instead of it taking any of us over it felt like we were all managing to work with it, harness it. A hint of ice and Fenris drifted through me, giving me a bit more stability which echoed through the pack bond as well. Our noses told us she was dead ahead, her and the rest of her pack.

We burst into a small clearing and came face to face with Mairyn and four wolves. They were all lined up in front of this beat up old house; heads down, fangs bared, ears back and none too happy. We could smell the vamps but didn't see them.

" _The vamps have to be inside."_ Sam said.

I stopped running and stared Mariyn down before replying to Sam. " _Worry about them later, take this bitch out first."_

Her injuries had healed and she was pissed off. " _He's helping you isn't he?"_ She spat out at us, " _No one is more dominant than I am, Fenris betrays me yet again."_

 _"No, you betrayed your pack,"_ Coyote answered, " _You pulled them back from Purgatory to take your revenge. They were more than happy to tell us where you were once they were free of you. I can feel these four trying to fight you as well."_

The four wolves were snarling at us, no doubt about that, but in between the snarls were whimpers and frustrated glances at Mairyn. They weren't standing here because they wanted to, that's for damn sure. Their heads weren't lowered and there was no real aggressive stance in their bodies, at least not towards us. When they looked at her though, that's when the ears would go back.

Sam brushed against me to get my attention, I shot a quick look at him. His eyes dropped down and focused on the legs of the beige colored wolf in front of him, then back to me. I got it. If we could take out the legs of Mariyn's new recruits fast then focus entirely on her we might be able to end this without killing anyone but her.

I leaned into his shoulder and we moved, totally in synch, just like the old days.

He tore into the beige wolf, I took the black wolf that was next to it. They cried out in pain when we broke their legs but I ignored it, they'd heal.

 _"Oliver! Roy! On me!"_ Coyote ordered. The three of them went after Mariyn while Sam and I wheeled around to take on the other two wolves. They stood there shaking their heads while pretty unconvincing growls came out of their mouths. They didn't want to do this.

" _Sit down."_ I told them, I knew I was more dominant than they were since they'd been unable to look me in the eye. It took about thirty seconds or so but their asses finally hit the dirt. _"Sam, make sure they stay here. I'm helping Coyote."_

 _"Got it."_ He shifted his gaze back to them from me, their eyes dropped even lower and they looked away. Good.

High pitched yelps and cries had been coming from behind me. I spun around just Oliver went flying back from a pretty serious hit Mairyn had managed to deliver. Coyote took advantage of the gap Oliver left to home in on Mairyn's throat. Mairyn jumped straight up, avoiding Coyote's hit. Since Coyote had lunged forward, Mairyn was now above her. Mairyn's claws raked along Coyote's back as she landed on top of Coyote.

I never want to hear the sound of that much pain come out of Coyote's mouth ever again.

-MATE! NO! - The wolf side pounded against my brain. Sam's rage joined mine, propelling me forward even faster.

Mairyn went in for the kill bite on the back of Coyote's neck.

The taste of Mairyn's flesh filled my mouth as I collided against her, pulling her off Coyote. Another scream came from Coyote as Mairyn's claws were pulled off her by the force of my hit.

Claws gouged into me as we rolled over each other, I didn't give a shit. She ended up on top of me, her dark, fucked up bond try to subvert the one I had with Coyote and my pack. " _Good luck with that bitch!"_ I shot back at her as I dug into her stomach with my back legs. As a human, the best I could do with my legs in this position is to throw someone over me. Having claws gave me a lot more options.

Since my legs move like a cat's I grabbed her, pulling her tight as I sunk my front claws into her shoulders. She went for my throat but I moved my head around and bashed my muzzle into hers which blocked her. I managed to shift my weight enough to roll us back over, stand on top of her and drive my back legs deep into her stomach.

Her head flew back, eyes wide as she shrieked and tried to wrench herself out of my grip. That wasn't going to happen. I pulled my front paws down her ribs and lunged for her jugular. I didn't even bother with ripping her throat apart, I went for the wide bite and didn't stop until I felt her neck snap.

She went limp, that wasn't good enough for me or Sam. Suddenly he was next to me putting huge tears into Mairyn's body. Within seconds the two of us had reduced her to a collection of bloody bits that were spread around for several feet in all directions.

A bullet slammed into me. It barely hurt.

"Holy shit!" An unknown voice came from the direction of the old house, a vampire. Sam and I looked up from the mess we'd made and growled. "That was silver..."

The vampire was male, short black hair, wearing jeans, a button up black shirt and was holding a shotgun. Apparently Mairyn hadn't informed them of what she really was.

"I thought she..." He looked scared shitless, so did the three others that joined him. They were staring at us, then back at the two wolves that were still sitting on the side, doing nothing.

Oh, this was going to be so much fun. I shifted back into human form, for some reason the fact that I wasn't dressed didn't bother me in the least.

The vamps slowly started recognizing me as I finished the change and stood up, "Oh god...Winchester..."

"Hi, just so you know," I said as I stretched my neck and took a step closer to them, "That bitch Mariyn lied to you. Silver doesn't work on her kind, which I'm one of now. She thought it'd be fun to have a pet Winchester in her pack. Guess that kind of backfired. Right Sam?"

I'd heard the cracking of bones and panting as Sam forced himself to shift to two legs as well. "Yeah, seems so. I wonder if eating vampires counts as beheading."

"As long as their head ends up off their shoulders, I doubt the method matters." I looked back over my shoulder at Roy and Oliver. They were already advancing forward. "Let's see, huh? Go for it guys." Then I pointed at the two wolves that Sam had been keeping an eye on, "You too. Take them out, be hunters again."

The vamps didn't stand a chance.


	36. Putting One Foot in Front of the Other

I ignored the vamp screams as Oliver and the rest took care of them. Coyote was still lying on her side, I could feel the burning pain from the tears in her side. Bits of rib were showing in the gashes, Mairyn had dug deep.

"Hold on sweetheart, hold on." Her eyes were closed tight, she was panting. I knew she'd heal but it didn't mean that it didn't hurt like hell. I put my hand on her head and watched as the bleeding slowed down. Sam and I stayed with her until the gashes had completely stopped bleeding and her eyes opened back up. "Better?"

She nodded. Oliver came back just as the two wolves who's legs Sam and I had shredded to bits managed to get back on their feet. Coyote rolled onto her stomach so she could look at them, then her bones started cracking and shifting.

When her shifting finished she sat up, pulled her hair in front so she was somewhat covered and looked at Oliver. "Any more vamps?"

Oliver looked away but shook his head. I was pretty sure he was keeping from looking at her more out of respect for the fact that she wasn't dressed than any dominance thing. I may have been okay standing in the woods with no clothes on but seeing Coyote naked around strangers wasn't sitting all that well with me. I didn't care so much about Oliver, Roy or Sam, I knew them, it was the other four that bugged me.

"Um honey..."

"Babe, get over it," she snapped, "Everyone here's an adult and I'm tired of wearing fur. I need to be human again, need to think this through. You four," she pointed at the new wolves, "lose the fur. I want to see your faces."

They did as she asked, I didn't recognize any of them but Sam did. "Tom and JJ," he said as he pointed them out. "I don't know the other two."

Tom was a tall pretty built guy with red hair, JJ was a short Asian woman with short hair she'd dyed blue. The other two were guys, one was Mexican with long black hair and a short, blonde white guy. We all kept our eyes fixed on each other's faces. Yeah, this wasn't awkward in the least.

"Carlos and Paul," Carlos said. "We're just started hunting a few years ago. Hadn't really met a lot of other hunters. Guess we should keep clear of them now."

"Sam and Dean Winchester," Sam said, "Running Coyote, Dean's fiance, the black wolf is a friend and the other one is a guy named Roy. Fill us in on what happened here."

Carlos nodded and gave us basically the same story that Audun had, except for the Purgatory part. Mairyn had jumped them, killed them, they managed to make it back. He added some more details though. Gordon had been working from the fringes of the hunter world to the center trying to get as much intel on Sam and I as he could without letting us know he was back among the living. He'd killed a slew of hunters along the way, it seemed that once he got what he needed he'd fed off them and dumped the bodies.

I kind of wished I hadn't burned his bones so I could bring him back and kill him a lot slower this time.

They confirmed that there were thirty five monsters backing Mairyn and volunteered to give us all the details on where they were. The four of them had seen Mariyn turn other hunters but if they came back too strong she killed them before they could become a threat. The four of them had been wolves for over a year.

"How did you escape getting killed by her?" Carlos asked after telling their story.

"We got lucky, all of us came back at once," I answered, "Long story and not that important. We have a group of human hunters waiting for us to give them a heads up. Tell us where these monsters are, we'll let them handle that part. Then we need to figure out what to do with you guys. I know a few werewolves, the usual kind, that have managed to deal with their wolf side for a few years. We can hook you up with them and you can give it a shot. None of you are super dominant but from what we've been told if you live somewhere away from things trying to kill you, you may have a chance. Quit hunting, go live out in the middle of nowhere, try it. If you can't pull it off, call us, we'll take care of it."

JJ wasn't too happy with my tone, "Really? What gives you the right to tell us what to do? You're monsters too."

"You're right, except we haven't killed hunters and innocents." Sam replied, for some reason he didn't sound all that understanding which wasn't like him, "We know you were forced to, we get it. We also know that technically you're part of our pack now, we don't want to build a pack. We want to stop more monsters from getting out of Purgatory then figure out the rest. We can kill you, technically we should since it's entirely possible you may snap and kill people but we're willing to give you a chance. Don't go back to hunting, it will make things harder on you."

JJ looked up at him, she tried to meet his eyes but couldn't.

Some of that harshness left his voice "Sorry, I think the wolf side felt like you were challenging me. Don't make me order you JJ, please. Just do what we ask for now. I'll call you later, once we're done with this mess."

The four of them glanced at each other, then Tom nodded, "All right. There's some paper in the house. We'll write everything down."

I started thinking about the next steps. We'd need our phones, clothes and would have to figure out what to do about the portal. I sure as hell didn't want to go back to Purgatory. Oliver and Roy shouldn't go and I didn't want Coyote anywhere near that place. It could take weeks to track down another rogue Reaper who'd take us across...wait.

"Sam, let's talk." I had an idea, but I wanted to run it by him first.

"Okay."

"Coyote, go with Tom and the rest, get all the info. We'll fill you in when you get back."

"All right." She stood up and I had to turn away fast to keep myself from being overly territorial. I have enough problems with that without the wolf side adding to it. Oliver and Roy stayed furry and followed them into the building.

Sam and I waited until we knew they were out of earshot, "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" Sam hissed, his face twisting up, filling with loathing and guilt, "I never wanted this! It's our fault they're monsters now! We just destroy lives Dean, that's all we ever do. You were out, happy, with Coyote, now look at us! At you! At her! What the hell are Oliver and Roy going to do now? Jesus!"

I hadn't expected that. He'd done a damn good job of hiding it from everyone, even me; or maybe he just finally had a minute to think. "Stop!" I snapped out, "They'll feel it! It's not your fault, not our fault. Roy's been fighting side by side with you for a year, he knows the risks, so does Oliver."

His fists balled up while his jaw tightened, "We never should have called them. I should have..."

"Have what? Done this yourself? I was right there when this shit went down. There was no way I'd let you once I knew Gordon was involved. Not your fault, not my fault." He looked away from me, "Hey, look at me." He didn't move, I put my hands on his shoulders, "We will figure this out. Make it work, we always do. You know that. Beating yourself up over the fact that we ran into a new monster that no one's ever seen or heard of before is pointless. We did the best we could with what we knew. We're saving lives, once we shut this down the hunters can go back to work. We saved their lives and the lives of the people they'll save in the future. Big picture this Sam, come on."

That got him to look back at me. I kind of wish he hadn't though, he was hurting and hurting bad. "What about us? About you? About what you were building? About them? Why is it every time we have to big picture something it's to justify how much our life sucks?"

"It comes with the territory, always has, always will. Look, I think I have a way to make this suck slightly less."

He knew I was trying to get him back on track. He glared at me because he wasn't in the mood to push past his guilt. I had to keep us stable enough so we could get everyone out of the woods, back into clothes and somewhere we could safely fall apart and deal with the whole fact that we weren't human anymore. He finally gave in, pushed his hair back and sighed, "How?"

"Well, I doubt either of us are really in the mood to visit Purgatory again, right?"

"Good guess," he grumbled.

"We need to shut down the Reapers and the portal though. I think it's about time the powers that be actually earn their damn keep for once." That got him curious, "It could take us months to find the Rogue reapers, but Death should be able to figure it out in a matter of minutes. That portal? In theory it was made as some sort of escape hatch for humans if one got stuck in the wrong place. God made the place, his people can fix it, either that or after the last human is out it should close back up. Once the Reapers know that Death is pissed, they'll probably fall back into line. We tell every last hunter to burn monsters once they kill them and that should solve the problem."

"I'm sure Death will be thrilled to answer another summons from us," he said, a mocking smirk on his face.

"I'll make my kick ass bison burgers with some pickle chips on the side for him. He doesn't really hate us, I hope."

He ignored my statement, "Are we sending Cas to Purgatory? How does that work?"

"No, I'm summoning Hannah. Cas has done enough, the rest of Heaven needs to get off it's ass and help out for once." I really hoped that phone call we'd ignored earlier was from Cas. If anything had happened to him, my conversation with Hannah was going to be a lot less diplomatic. I'm sure angels could still kill me but ending up in Purgatory was actually preferable to Heaven or Hell as far as I was concerned. I hated angels and Crowley could kiss my ass. If I was in Purgatory I'd be out of both of their domains, which was fine by me.

"What makes you think either of them, Death or Hannah will want to help?"

"Simple, Death hates chaos, he's all about order. He won't be happy to find out that his Reapers are fucking with the natural order of things. Hannah? I'll have Cas ask her, if that doesn't work I'll remind her just how much Heaven owes us."

He started thinking things through, "She may not see it that way."

I was so done letting other people blow past the facts, "Fact: We put Lucifer back in his place. He would have wiped them out, we all know that. Shit, they were losing even before he got out thanks to corrupt angels. Fact: Cas stopped Metatron in the end, restoring Heaven. Fact: We've killed more high level demons than angels have, ever, from what I can tell. If it wasn't for us, Abaddon, Alistair or Azazel would still be running Hell, not Crowley. So they fucking owe us, and we can keep her here as long as it takes for her to see it. We can ward the building from other angels, block her from using angel radio and have a nice long chat if we need to."

"You'd hold Hannah hostage? Cas won't go for that."

"Cas isn't here and I doubt it will go that far. Hannah's reasonable-ish for an angel anyway." He mulled it over for a minute or two, I didn't need the pack bond to know that not only did he like the idea but he was kind of surprised I'd come up with it. "Doing things different, I'm sticking to what I promised you. Not charging into ridiculous odds anymore. Don't care if I'm basically immortal now, tired of getting burned by everything else out there. Time to give responsibility back to the damn beings that are supposed to be running the place."

"I'm down with that. Think the spells will still work now that we're not human?"

Hadn't thought about that, "Should, blood is blood right?"

"Yeah, I guess." He shrugged, "We'll find out pretty quick."

"True that."

I heard steps behind me and took a second to remember no one was going to have clothes on when I turned around.

"We got all the information," Coyote said, "Tom and the rest are coming with us. We need to get phones,call Rick and Dig, get clothes, clean up and figure out the next step."

I was pretty sure she already knew Sam and I had worked the next step out but no one but our group needed to know that. Sam and I had chosen to ignore that we were covered in blood, wasn't the first time, won't be the last. The blood didn't disappear with the fur, our mouths were smeared with it. Sam and Coyote had streaks of it where they'd been injured, our hands and feet were caked in it. It wasn't as obvious on Coyote, thanks to her darker skin tone but we all looked downright gruesome.

"Sounds good," I said, "Let's put fur back on, will make it harder for any random hikers to spot us on our way back." That and I really didn't want to stand around naked much longer, especially covered in blood.

She nodded, we all shifted back and ran back to the cave. The whole way back I was trying to figure out just how to explain all this to Dig and Rick while hoping that when I picked up my phone there'd be a message from Cas.


	37. Explanations

We walked into the cave, I went back to human form, dug around in my trashed pants and grabbed my phone. It was still working, thankfully and the missed call was from Cas. That was a good start anyway.

"Cas called, I'll call Dig," I said to the assorted wolves that were standing around me, "Have him bring some clothes. He may have to break into Sam's and my room, we didn't put extras in Baby like we usually do. The one time, I swear. Tom, Carlos, I'll call Rick too, see if he's keen on having you guys join him. If not we'll try to figure something else out."

Sam shook his head, " _No, I'll do it after we get clothes. Tell Dig to bring some bottled water so we can clean up some before we get dressed. I know Rick better than you do."_

"All right." I pulled up the voice mail and listened to it first.

"Dean, it's me. I'm back," He sounded like he was in pain, "I'm fine. I'm about three hours away. I'll acquire a car and return as soon as I can. Please let me know how things are. Coyote seemed upset when I connected with her briefly in her sleep. We shall speak soon." Then he hung up.

Sam and Coyote's ears were straight up and facing me, "Cas is about three hours out, he's going to get a car and head back this way," Sam gave me this funky look, like I was repeating myself. "You guys heard that voicemail huh?"

" _Yes,"_ Coyote answered.

"Right, well that makes things easier. Guess I'll call Dig now." I pushed Dig's name on my phone, he picked it up the second it started ringing.

"Dean?"

"Yeah, we're all alive."

"Good." He didn't even try to hide how relieved he was.

"Well kind of. Look, we need clothes. All of us, including Coyote. We'll explain when you get here. No, no orgies or anything fun like that was involved. Mairyn and her pack are dead. I'll call the hotel and see if they can give you a spare key for our rooms. Did Oliver give you a spare one for his?"

"Yes. Why am I getting the feeling that alive came at a price?"

"Because it usually does. Just grab some clothes, I'll text you where we are. Call me when you get here, we can't meet you in the parking lot. We'll guide you in. Oh and bring lighter fluid, matches and bottles of water. We need to clean up a few messes."

He hesitated for a second, "All right. See you soon."

I knew he wouldn't let us down. "Got it." We hung up, I texted him where we were, called the hotel and told them to give him a copy of our keys because he was getting something from the rooms for us, got off that call and looked at Sam. "Sure you want to call Rick. The more we shift the hungrier we get."

He didn't answer as his bones cracked and moved while he panted and whimpered in pain. I got the feeling that no matter how many times we did this it would still hurt like hell. Sam stayed on his hands on knees for a minute, catching his breath. "Yeah. Give me your phone. Don't feel like digging for mine." He sat down, I handed him my phone. While he scrolled through my contacts I started gathering up all our phones and everything else from our pockets.

"Oliver, Roy. See if you can backtrack and find our weapons. That way when Dig shows up we won't have to spend time tracking them down. Either stick them in a pile somewhere or shift and bring them here, up to you."

" _Do you think we can talk long distance like this?"_ Oliver asked.

"We'll find out I guess. If you guys aren't back when Dig gets here, I'll yell your name a few times once we get clothes on and are headed back here to clean up. Just in case the whole speaking with our mind thing fails. I'm sure you'll hear it."

" _Sounds good. Roy?"_

Roy didn't reply, just spun around and started loping out towards the opening. I knew at some point he was going to lose it. I had a feeling it still didn't seem real to him yet. As long as he kept busy, as we kept busy, we could push the other crap away. Oliver followed him without another word.

I could hear both sides of Sam's conversation with Rick. It was creepy yet kind of cool. It took some convincing but Sam got Rick to agree to take Tom and the rest in, for now anyway. As soon as Sam got off that call my phone rang again.

"It's Dig," Sam stated, "Hey Dig."

"Sam. I'm parked next to Baby. Now what."

"Right, start walking south. You'll come to a dry creek bed about a mile in. We'll meet you there. Oliver and Roy are out rounding up our weapons. Bring everything with you. Look for a large white wolf. Don't panic."

"Wolf?" Dig doesn't panic easily, but I could hear it in his voice, "What the...oh no. All of you?"

Sam's guilt-ridden eyes met mine, "Yes, I'm sorry. It's.."

"No.." Dig interrupted, "You're alive, all of you are. She's dead. The threat's been eliminated. The rest doesn't matter right now." There was no doubt or condemnation in his words or tone.

Sam's eyes widened as he struggled with what Dig was saying. That was two of us now telling him not to blame himself and I knew Coyote and Oliver would say the same thing. Kind of weird that the shoe was on the other foot, usually I'm the one people are telling not to feel guilty.

"I'll meet you guys at the creek bed," Dig continued, "See you soon."

Once Dig hung up Coyote started talking, _"Tom, do you guys have clothes back at the cabin?"_

 _"Yup."_

She got right in their faces, they looked away from her as she stood in front of them. " _Rick agreed to house you four. Do I have your word that you will go to the cabin, get dressed, call him, meet him somewhere and not hunt?"_

All four of them nodded.

" _Good. What's your phone number so Dean can send you Rick's number?"_

" _602-232-1556,"_ Tom answered.

" _All right, we will be checking in with Rick. You don't meet up with him, we will come looking for you. He'll keep us updated on how you guys are doing. Stick with hunting wildlife and you won't see us again. Understood?"_

 _"Yes, thank you Alpha,"_ Carlos replied.

 _"Good. Dean, send Rick that number, then let's meet Dig. I really want to get this blood off me. You four go get dressed, call Rick and start making your way to his place."_

I did as she asked, Sam and I pulled fur back on and about ten minutes later we tracked Dig down. I saw him before he saw us so we stepped out of the treeline and I barked. His head whipped around and he stood stock still. I wasn't sure where the thought came from, but I threw my head back and howled. Oliver and Roy replied instantly. There was a lot of white showing in Dig's eyes, I'm sure if he had a lighter skin tone he'd be getting a lot more pale.

" _Was that really necessary?"_ Coyote asked, " _You just scared the crap out of him."_

 _"Um, easier than yelling Oliver?"_

 _"Seriously? Get him over here so we can get cleaned up and clothed."_

 _"Yes ma'am."_ I waved my paw at him, then pointed at the treeline. He nodded and slowly started walking towards us. We waited until he was next to us then we all headed into the denser woods. We found a stand of trees that blocked views from most directions and switched back to two legs. Dig's jaw dropped wide open before we were even halfway through. He recovered fast though and started digging through the bag he had. The first thing he pulled out was some of Coyote's clothes and a bottle of water.

He made sure to turn away from her as she finished shifting, "Here, I'll just, um look over here. Tell me when you're decent. Guys, all your stuff's in the bag too."

She took her clothes and the water, "Thanks. Babe, can you help me? I think there's blood on my back." Something about having clothes in her hands made her start shaking.

It was real now and it was hitting her hard. She looked and felt like she was about to throw up and her teeth started chattering. "Sure honey, sure. Let's get some space. Come on." I spotted one of my shirts rolled up around a pair of jeans so I grabbed it and wrapped my arms around her shoulders, she just about fell into me. I guided her behind some larger trees so we'd have some privacy.

"Oh god, oh god...we're monsters, we ate them...we..." Her breaths started coming in gasps. "I, you..."

"I know, I know, shhh...let it out, you've been so damn strong." I pulled her close and held on tight.

"So much blood, it made me...I couldn't stop.." I felt tears hit my chest.

"We had to, or we'd be a lot worse off. Not anyone's fault here..."

"Worse? Worse than what?" She asked, "I can feel it, the wolf, it's so strong. It wants to hunt. How do I deal with this? How do we?"

I was already hungry again and I knew Sam was too. All the shifting had burned through what we'd eaten earlier.

"I don't know, but we will. We'll work it out, I promise."

"How do we go home? Go back? Live? How Dean? How?"

I felt her spiraling emotions in full high def. Roy was starting to pick up on them too, which was making him lose it. I closed my eyes and focused on the pack, I could almost see in my mind the strands that connected us together so I started throwing up blocks. I sectioned off Coyote and I, without really knowing how. The only reason I knew it was working was because I could feel Roy start settling back down.

"One step at a time sweetheart, one step. We can control this, we search for something, anything that can help. If we don't find anything, that's when we make permanent life changes. Right now, just focus on getting dressed, getting cleaned up. Cas is on his way, maybe he can do something. If all else fails, we move in with Sam for the time being."

She pulled her face off my chest and met my gaze, "We can do that, but what about Oliver and Roy? They have lives elsewhere. What are they supposed to do?"

"They may need to take some time off. It's too risky for them to be doing the vigilante thing right now. Besides, can you imagine how pissed Oliver will be if h shifts and rips through that suit he wears? That's leather and custom made. It's not like he can pick one up at Superheroes Costuming down the street."

It was small and kind of forced, but she managed to smile. "Good point. We can't have that happen can we? He does have an image to maintain."

I kissed her forehead, I didn't think she'd be all that keen on anything else at the moment. "Exactly. Here, let me wash you off."

Dig had wrapped up some washcloths inside the stacks of clothes. She took a small step back from me which let me soak a washcloth and start rubbing blood off her. As I worked my way from one of her hands to the next, then did her face, torso and feet she became less and less shaky. By the time she pulled her pants on she felt more like her usual self.

"Let me get you," she said after she finished getting her shirt on.

"Sure." I held my hands out for her and forced myself to relax into the feel of the cloth as she rubbed it along my skin. I'd been through too many things like this to really panic, at least yet. In a few weeks if we hadn't found a way back to being human, then I'd panic. I was more concerned about Roy and Oliver and how they'd deal with this. Oliver would not like being away from Starling for any length of time, same with Roy, not to mention how the hell they were going to explain this to Felicity, Thea and the rest of their team.

Once she'd finished cleaning as much blood off as she could she handed me my clothes, I got dressed and we got ready to join everyone else. We'd both heard Roy and Oliver walk by, shift and clean up. They were being quiet though, too quiet, even through the pack bond.

"Everyone decent?" I asked before we walked out around the trees.

"Yeah," Sam answered.

"Good." As soon as I saw them it was plain as day why they weren't talking. Neither Oliver or Roy really had any idea how to start this conversation and it looked like Sam had been waiting for us to get back. Great. Dig looked at us and didn't say a word, his face was doing the talking for him. "Right, so we're all werewolves now." I may as well be blunt, "Not the usual kind either. They ambushed us, hamstrung us, dragged us to a cave, killed us, we woke up in some sort of in between place, met Fenris, as in the wolf son of Loki, he told us that he was the one who had gifted Mairyn with the whole wolf thing. Since we were killed by werewolves, we came back as werewolves, with Fenris' help. Mairyn went evil centuries ago, Fenris killed her, leaving the rest of her pack to pretty much fend for themselves. Eventually they all got killed and went to Purgatory. Fast forward to about two years ago. According to some of Mairyn's pack that got dragged back with her, a rogue Reaper, as in the things that take your soul when you die and deliver it to where ever it's supposed to go, hooked up with Gordon somehow and they started working on bringing monsters out.

That happened because of when I was down there, then got out, the monsters realized they could escape. So for the last two years monsters have been coming back, learning how to hunt hunters and planning. Fast forward to now. Mairyn and her pack are dead, there's about thirty five regular monsters that were working with her. We know where they are and are going to send Gerald and the rest after them. We're basically unkillable now, except for things like being drowned. We also have a pretty hardcore predatory side now too, that would be the downside.

Sam and I came up with a way to deal with the portal and the Reaper without any of us having to go to Purgatory, we hope. We'll explain that later once we clean up all the corpses in the cave. Any questions?"

As I'd rattled everything off the amount of disbelief mixed with horror and confusion grew on Dig's face. When I finally stopped he looked at all of us in turn, shook his head, took a deep breath and picked up his bag. "Yes, but this isn't the place for them. Destroy the evidence, get back to civilization and then we can talk. Where's this cave?"

Talk about rock fucking solid. If I didn't have Sam, Dig would be the man I'd hunt with, hands down.


	38. Dawning Realizations

We got back to the cave, pretty much walked in silence the whole way. Oliver and Roy had led us to the pile of our weapons they made, we picked them up then moved on. Everyone, even Sam and I had a lot to process.

As we walked in and the smell of blood hit us Dig stopped moving, "What the hell happened here?"

"Wolves killed us, we came back and killed them," I explained, "Think about it. We didn't have weapons."

"We ate them..." Roy murmured. "We had to." Roy had frozen at the entrance too. "I can't go back in there, I can't." He couldn't even look in.

Coyote put her arm around his shoulders, "You don't have to. They can handle the clean up. Stay out here with me."

Roy nodded and leaned against her. Part of me got jealous, part of me felt protective of Roy and there was this automatic urge to try to comfort him somehow. This whole pack bond thing was going to take some getting used to. Coyote's not the type for random displays of affection with people she's not involved with, so in one way it was totally out of character for her, yet it felt completely natural from the wolf aspect. I knew Roy didn't cozy up to people he wasn't dating either.

It felt like the five of us had suddenly become as close as Sam, Coyote and I, which was pretty uncomfortable for Oliver and I. We cared about each other, sure, but we weren't as tight as this bond was making us. Sam was having an easier time with it since he was already close to Roy and Coyote seemed to just be riding it out for now.

"You ate them?" Dig asked. "Why?"

"So we wouldn't go full wolf and never make it back," Sam answered. "They volunteered. Let's get this over with, we'll explain everything later." He looked at me, "Are we cleaning up at that house too?"

"No, Tom and the others will, they know monsters are coming back from Purgatory. Our human blood is all over the cave, I have a feeling the wolf blood won't be a match if they find any. Torch the blood, burn the bodies, clear out."

"All right."

Dig, Sam and I went in. Oliver followed us for most the trip, but just as we came to the turn that led into the area where we'd been he stopped. "I'll wait here."

That's when Dig gave Sam and I a real long look, "How bad is it?"

"Bad." I said and kept walking.

The area where we'd been was about the size of a one bedroom place, maybe six hundred square feet, the ceiling was around seven feet high Sam had to keep ducking to avoid chunks of low hanging rocks, and it was covered in blood. There was blood up the walls, some on the ceiling, there wasn't any clear space on the floor to walk on. We'd probably have to wash our shoes or get new ones since we'd end up tracking it out. There were eight wolf bodies, four of them were mostly devoured. The other four were in various states of dismemberment or gutted.

I pointed at several piles of fabric scraps, "That's what's left of our clothes. Some of that damage is from being gutted by Mairyn's pack, the rest is from when we changed the first time. They didn't kill us easy Dig, trust me. Those blood trails leading in here, from all of us being hamstrung and dragged in the mouths of her pack to get here. We'll scatter the bloody dirt on our way back and try to torch any blood we find on rocks, or move them."

He was trying hard to keep his stomach contents inside him and not puke. "I've seen a lot of bad shit in my time but..."

"Yeah, I know." I looked at Sam, he nodded and we started spraying lighter fluid on the cave walls and floor. I gathered up everyone's phones. After that was done we laid a trail of it back towards the entrance. I wasn't going to be anywhere near that when it caught fire, not in the mood to have third degree burns to heal from. We were about ten feet from the entrance when I lit an entire book of matches and looked over my shoulder, "Stand clear." Everyone took a few more steps back, I dropped the book. Fire raced into the cave and seconds later we smelled burning flesh, fur and blood. A nice gust of heat came back at me, bringing all those scents with it in full force. Sam and I threw a bunch of dirt and rocks on top of beginning the lighter fluid trail to keep the flames from spreading and backed away. For all we knew, that blood that was burning on the cave floor was the last human blood we'd ever shed.

We all stared at the entrance for a minute or two then I knew I had to get them all moving. Other than Sam and I, they were all starting to lose. "Let's move. Sam? I'll call Gerald, tell him where the monsters are holed up. Get his ass moving. You call Cas, see where he's at, tell him we're going to be at the hotel for another few hours then checkout and head to the Bunker. Then call Rick, check to see if he's heard from Tom."

"What are you going to tell Gerald if he asks if we're joining him?" Sam asked.

"Tell him we're hurt, not bad but be better if they took care of it. Then I'll say we're heading back to the Bunker and he can call us when he's done."

Sam shook his head, "No, we have to clue him in. Unless I completely leave the life and you and Coyote don't go back home we'll run into him again."

"So we do what Rick did and lie. You're getting way too far ahead here Sam. If, when, we decide to share this newest jacked up twist he'll understand why we didn't say so before. We still have Purgatory to deal with. Hunters can wait."

"What about us?" Oliver asked, "What exactly are Roy and I supposed to say to everyone in Starling? Or do?"

"We'll figure that out," I said, "Sam and I are going to keep you clear of the Purgatory side of things. Hopefully. Right now we need to get home so we can work through all of this." Technically Coyote should be taking charge here, at least according to the pack ranking, but she was as shell shocked as the rest of them. Good thing my stubborn ass side was still fully intact. "Look, this is the shit that can happen with hunting, the entire world can flip on you in an instant. Yes, we're not human anymore. Yes, it sucks serious ass. It's also not the end of the world. As long as we're still breathing we keep moving forward and trying to fix this. Sam and I have been in much worse positions than this and we pulled through. I've met plenty of monsters in my time that we're still leading a normal-ish life. We just need to figure out how to deal with it while we're finding a way to reverse it. It won't happen tomorrow, or next month. It could take years but unless you want to drown yourselves this is who you are now. We will deal with this, together, and get through it. All right?"

"To add to that," Sam started out, "Technically Dean and I have kept going even when we weren't breathing, so have all of you. Every single one of us could have ended up dead, not a werewolf. We pulled each other through those walls to get back here, through the pain, through all of it. I know this is hard, I know it's confusing but we will make it right, I will, somehow."

Blaming ourselves is a Winchester trait, seems that Sam had inherited my share of it over the last year.

Oliver made this weird rubbing gesture with the thumb and forefinger of his right hand and nodded, "All right, back to the hotel then."

He looked calm, sounded calm, but he wasn't. I'd take the act though, really that's what all of us were doing. Acting. We got back to Baby and Dig's car, hiding or burning blood along the way, put the weapons away, loaded up and pulled out. I'd decided to wait to call Gerald till we got back and ate. We were all dangerously hungry again. I noticed it on the walk back, all of our eyes kept tracking things that moved even though there was no more threats in the woods around us. My mouth watered a few times when I saw a rabbit, Coyote had gripped my hand when she'd spotted prey animals to keep herself from going after them.

I'd had a year of being on high alert in Purgatory, dealing with the urge to kill while I bore the Mark and in some ways this was worse than both of those times. The wolf side made it seem natural to want to chow down on a rabbit, not wrong. There was no unnatural hate being pushed at me from a curse, this was just the simple desire to eat, multiplied by a lot. I understood Fenris' statement that the wolf isn't the monster, humans are. The wolf just wants to survive. The problem comes when the human side chooses to use the whole mostly unkillable thing as a reason to go dark.

If we couldn't find a way back we'd all be looking at some very long lives. What the hell do you do to fill up the time and how would Roy and Oliver deal with outliving all their friends and loved ones? Unfortunately, Sam and I are experts at that already.


	39. Alternate Viewpoints

I have a pretty big appetite in general, but there's something unnerving about eating an entire plate of food, plus my own appetizer, a crap ton of bread and still feeling like I could eat more. This was going to make food shopping a helluva a lot more expensive, course there's plenty of open territory where Coyote and I live, we could always go hunt. Although I didn't know if the energy spent tracking and eating something would be offset but what we managed to catch. It also kind of bothered me how easy that thought came to me, going and hunting down a deer, on all fours. It actually sounded fun and I wasn't quite sure what that said about me. We kept the conversation away from werewolves while eating. I called Gerald once I finished and changed the story to we were going to deal with Purgatory while they cleaned up the monsters. He said he didn't want to know what that meant and was happy to stick to dealing with shit that didn't make him question realiity even more. I wish I had that option. Then I texted Cas, told him we were alive with complicatons and we'd be heading back to the Bunker in a few hours in case he wanted to meet us there instead. He texted back that he assumed complications meant whatever we had to tell him was best discussed there rather than a hotel and he'd redirect to the Bunker. One thing I've always appreciated about Cas, he knows how to wait for things. On the flip side of that, the one thing that used to irritate the hell out of me about him was how long it took him to understand sharing information when it was useful and not wait until the last minute. Guess that's pretty much the pot calling the kettle black though coming from me.

The food, or the act of eating, seemed to help settle Roy and Oliver. Dig knew better than to ask questions until we were away from people that could overhear. Turns out the wolf senses didn't disappear when we were human. I could clearly make out every single conversation within the entire lounge area when I focused on them. Hell, I managed to catch some sounds from the kitchen as well, and the smells. Talk about overwhelming at first. Anything sugary smelled extra sweet, the smell of bacon, or any meat really, had a whole lot more layers now. I could tell the type of meat that was on a plate when the waiter walked by without even looking at it. Then there was the people smells, uggh. Deodorant, cologne, aftershave, shampoo, body odor in general. Everything was so much stronger, and it was really obvious now who wore cheap ass shit. Thank God Coyote didn't wear anything strong smelling in general. She went for more subtle natural scents with things she wore and products she used, if she hadn't we'd be tossing a lot of bottles when we got back home.

As I processed all of that while we ate I started picking out other smells from people. A couple sitting four tables away from us had had a fight before breakfast, I could smell the anger even if they were acting fine. Another couple to our right, well they'd had some early morning fun. There was a family with three kids. The youngest boy was still in diapers and he'd just filled them. Gross. I could tell so much just from the smells around me, it was interesting and creepy at the same time.

I'd watched Oliver as he worked his way through the same things I was, he was starting to calculate how this turn of events may be useful for him. It'd be damn hard for people to sneak up on him now, between the hearing and the sense of smell he'd be miles ahead of everyone around him. It didn't surprise me that he'd put that together and fast, he's a survivor, just like Sam and I. You take whatever shit the world throws at you and find a way to make it work for you.

When we all finished, I downed the last bit of my coffee and spoke up, "Let's head back to my room, we can sort stuff out there." They just nodded and followed Coyote and I down the hall. Once we'd all filed inside, shut the door and they sprawled out over the bed, floor and chairs Oliver, Roy, Coyote and Dig just looked at Sam and I. I gestured to Sam to see if he wanted to start this little gathering.

He sighed, "Fine. Let's talk Purgatory first. Dean and I are going to have a conversation with Death, as in the actual Horseman slash entity of Death, along with one or more angels and maybe even the King of Hell if we have to. Our working theory is that since Reapers are helping monsters to escape Death won't be pleased. Death is in charge of Reapers and he's pretty OCD about them staying on task. If we can get him to stop the Reapers and make it clear that them going rogue isn't their best option for a long life span that will be a start. Then we need to close the portal, we're hoping an angel can, or at least know if it will close once there are no more humans in Purgatory. If they don't Crowley, the King of Hell might. He's also a witch, and damn good with spells, as much as I hate to admit it. The whole idea is to keep Dean and I from having to go back there. Dean lost a year there already. Who knows how much time will pass here if we have to go there to fix this shit. As Dean put it, the beings that are supposed to be running this place should step up and try to fix it every now and then."

It was pretty apparent that Oliver and Roy had hit their limit of being shocked at anything we said. They'd just had a crash course into alternate realities and beings that were supposedly just myths. Dig? Not so much. As soon as Sam had mentioned actually talking to Death, not to mention Crowley that rock solid exterior he'd managed to keep up straight up vanished.

"Back up, you said something about talking to Death? What? How?"

"Death can be summoned," Sam answered, "We've done it before. He likes pickle chips and good food so we try to make sure we have something for him. He's the only supernatural being we do that for."

"Yeah, since we keep ditching him. One of these times he might actually get offended by it." I'll never not be nervous talking to Death. He's too calm, never seems to have an agenda and there's no real leverage I could ever have on him. He's Death, who the hell does he have to be worried about? That, and in a twisted sort of way, other than Cas, he's the only supernatural being I actually trust and respect. At least until I got together with Coyote, her guides seem to be pretty on the level. Death's never screwed us over, even after we bound him that one time. I think he finds Sam and I interesting, which really unnerves me.

"So, let me get this straight," Dig said, "You summon Death, tell him what's going on and hope he helps because you feed him?"

"It'd be nice if it was that easy," I replied, "Course with Death, you can never really tell, he seems to appreciate the food. It's more about keeping the balance, not that Sam and I usually bother with playing by the rules, but Death is big on that. When things get out of whack, there are a lot of unintended consequences and Death doesn't like that. What we're hoping is that he sees these Reapers as disobeying their prime job and shuts them down. Of the two things we need to do, dealing with Death will be the easiest. Getting angels to do anything useful is nearly impossible and Crowley won't do anything unless there's some sort of perk in it for him." I also doubted Crowley would be in an understanding mood since Sam threatened him last time they talked but Dig and the rest didn't need to know about that.

"And how are we supposed to help with this?" Oliver asked in a quiet voice.

"You're not actually," I told him. "Once you get on the radar of these things, you never get off of it. I don't want any of you within miles of us when we do this."

"So what, we go back to Starling and hope we don't rip someone to shreds?" His quiet tone was turning aggressive and his eyes locked onto mine.

The wolf side flared up and without even thinking about it a low growl rumbled through me, the wolf felt he was challenging me. Oliver's lip curled up in a snarl, baring his teeth. That's when I heard Sam's growl matching mine. Oliver took a step forward, Roy grabbed his arm and that's when Coyote moved.

Coyote stood up, got between us and a calmness rippled through the pack bond. Right after the calm came a sense of imposed order. "Settle down! All of you!" There was no denying her when she took that tone, the alpha had spoken.

Oliver closed his eyes and turned his head away from me. Sam and I instantly settled down.

"What the fuck was that?" Dig asked.

"The wolf side," Coyote explained. "Dean's wolf thought Oliver was challenging him. We were told the pack rank goes Me, Sam and Dean are pretty much even, although if Dean and I weren't a couple Dean would be below Sam, then Oliver, then Roy. The wolves we ate explained a lot about how this works. We had to to do it Dig, when we came back from the wolf side was so hungry, so hard to control. We managed to use it to our advantage and rip Mairyn and her pack to shreds. Once Mairyn fled, the remaining four wolves explained that since I was more dominant than Mariyn the bonds she had formed with them could be broken and they could be pulled into our pack."

She kept talking and Dig's eyes just kept getting wider. She went through the whole day, step by step. While she did that I tried to figure out how to keep us all safe and make sure Oliver and Roy could handle being out on the streets fighting again. We could have them stay at a hotel while we dealt with Death and the rest but after that I wasn't sure. Sam or I may have to go back to Starling with him for a few months until they adapted to this whole thing. There was no way Oliver would stay at the Bunker, researching, waiting for a cure. He was already getting impatient. I guess Coyote could order him but I knew she wouldn't go for that and I wasn't about to keep Oliver hostage. There may be no way back and he'd have to learn how to live with this. Then Sam looked at me and I could tell he'd already figured out an answer to the problem.

Coyote had gotten to right around when Dig showed up. Sam let her finish and looked back at Oliver and Roy while Dig processed. "How's this sound? I doubt Dean wants Coyote anywhere near Death and friends either. All of us need to see if we can handle high stress situations now but in a way that limits the chances of us losing it. Coyote can keep you two in line and Dean and I will even each other out. We always have before. So here's my idea. You two and Coyote go on a hunt while Dean and I take care of our end. If you shred a vamp or whatever it's no great loss, or maybe go after a vengeful spirit. Those things are all low threat levels compared to the being surrounded by criminals in the streets of Starling, especially since we really can't be killed or turned into anything else."

It was a pretty clever plan actually.

Roy shot him a questioning look, "What about you and Dean? You need to figure that out too."

"Trust me, negotiating with angels, Death and Crowley will push our buttons plenty," I said, "Especially Crowley and Cas will be with us. If we get out of hand he can just put us to sleep," I thought about that phrase, sort of had a different meaning now that we were part wolf. "Not permanently, just make us sleep."

Coyote wasn't entirely on board with it though, worry flooded the bond but she pulled it back as quick as she could. It wasn't just worry about me, she was as scared about this as they were. "You seriously think I'm going to leave you to go hunt right now?" She was trying to keep her face neutral but I saw the pleading in her eyes which came along with the doubt I felt coming from her.

"Honey, you can do this and Sam's right. I don't want any of these things to get a whiff of you, of us. Once they do, every single person back home is in danger. They'll be seen as leverage." That got her pissed off, which was better than worried at the moment. "One hunt. We'll track down a haunting, cake walk hunt, comparatively speaking. Those are mostly investigating anyway, not a lot of hand to hand action. Please."

She frowned, "Because the whole cursed object thing we just did with Jacob was a cake walk."

"I said comparatively."

She mulled it over for another minute or so, growing more and more calm as she did. She knew how paranoid I was about demons or anything else finding us. "I see your point. One hunt. Then we figure out long term strategies on dealing with this. Oliver? Roy?"

Roy shrugged and looked pretty helpless. "I guess. I don't want to go back and hurt someone."

Oliver was struggling, he wasn't used to being in a position where someone forced him to back down like Coyote just had, of not being in charge, of having something inside trying to overpower his rational mind. He tightened his jaw, tried to meet my eyes again and had to drop his gaze pretty fast. I managed to keep my wolf in check this time but it wasn't easy.

"Fine. I don't have any other choice.," He finally muttered, "I'm going to call Felicity. Tell me when we're heading out. Roy, you should probably call Thea." He turned away, back stiff and walked out. Damn.

Roy followed, a lot slower and with not nearly as much confidence. Before he opened the door he looked back at us, he reminded me so much of Sam when we couldn't save Madison, so lost, hurting so damn much. He was the monster though, not the person he loved. These are the conversations that you can never prepare for, no matter how long you hunt.

"What do I even say?" He asked.

"Do you want me to talk to her? Help explain things?" Sam offered.

Roy didn't answer, he didn't need to, we felt the answer and even if we hadn't it was written all over his face. Sam just walked over to him, put his arm around Roy's shoulders and they walked out together. Talk about seeing yourself in someone else, I can't count the number of times I'd done the exact same thing with Sam. Wow.

Dig got up, "I'll go keep an eye on Oliver."

"Good idea. He'll need you," I said.

He took a step, then stopped, "Dean, what if.."

"Dig, rule number one in these situations, what ifs don't help anyone. We'll deal with it when we have to."

"Yeah...guess so." He left without another word.

Coyote and I didn't really talk about it, we just curled up next to each other on the bed. I took a couple of breaths, the scent of her hair, her skin, everything was almost overpowering. I could smell the fear, the confusion and the slow revelation of what we were hit her now that we were alone with no distractions.

"We're not human," she whispered.

"I know." I held her as she tightened her grip on my chest.

"We killed things, with our teeth. Ripped our their stomachs, we were covered in blood."

"I know." I focused on sending her as much stability as I could, it was my turn to be the rock in our relationship, not the fucked up one. After all these years Dealing with shit like this was pretty much second nature for me.

"We...Babe...I..." She struggled with the words, "What Fenris said, about all my guides being something else before. How do I trust them again? They aren't...aren't..." She couldn't finish the thought.

"Did I ever tell you about the Archangel Gabriel?"

"No."

"Sam and I ran into him a few times, worked with him once or twice, he actually gave his life for us in the end. When we first came across him we thought he was a trickster pagan god, like your Coyote. This was way before we knew angels were real. Over the years things happened and we finally found out he was an Archangel. Last time we saw him, we were stuck in this hotel with a bunch of pagan gods, big names, Odin, Kali, Baldur, Ganesha. They were trying to come together to fight Lucifer and the rest, stop the Apocalypse. Gabriel showed up, he had a thing for Kali. Anyway, all those pagan gods, not a single one of them knew he was an Archangel. They all called him Loki."

She tilted her head up "What?"

I looked down into her eyes, "Yeah, sounded like they believed he was Loki too. Gabriel had always stated he was in a Divine Relocation Program. You see, he got tired of the bickering between Lucifer, God and Michael and just left Heaven, became someone else. For a long time I thought he was a complete jackass, in the end though, he did what he did because he didn't want to fight his brother, Lucifer. I can't knock him for that. Anyway, he and Lucifer fought, Lucifer killed all the other gods and Gabriel. We got Kali out though, Gabriel made sure of that."

"All right, and?"

"Look, your guides, they help you, they've never steered you wrong. Maybe they're angels in hiding, maybe things like Fenris, but in the end it doesn't matter what name they went by before. They're doing what they should be doing, helping you help your people. I think they've earned a bit of trust, you know how hard it is for me to trust anything that's not human. You gave me another chance, give them some leeway here. Fenris had a point, when faced with immortality how do you fill the time. If these ones are filling their time by being helpful, that's a lot better than what they could be doing."

"Yeah, I guess. It's just." She shook her head, "I don't know why it's bothering me so much, I know there are different gods."

"Because you put faith in these, you've talked to them, they're real to you. That's why it's hard. Our god sure as hell never bothered to do that. To be honest Hon, I have more faith in your guides then I ever will in the white people's god. Yours at least show up."

She smiled, "Sometimes too much."

"Yeah, they are kind of bossy."

"Do you think Death will help you? And can I just say that's a question I never thought I would ask."

I chuckled, "I've had whole months where everything I said was something I never thought I'd say, but yeah. I think out of all of them Death will be the most likely to help. That's if the Reapers are actually going rogue and there isn't something going on behind the scenes. Which there almost always is, but I don't want to delve into all that yet."

"Why not?"

"Because, we have something more important to do." I pulled out my phone, logged into the hotel's wifi and kissed her hair.

"We do? I sort of thought this was top priority."

"Nope, this is." I typed in Alaskan cruises, "Doubt I can pass a background check for a passport, so how about Alaska?"

She sat up and looked at me like I'd completely lost my mind.

"The deal was, we make it through the hunt, we book a cruise. We made it through, now we book a cruise."

"But...what about?"

"You know how much food they have on a cruise? We won't go hungry and can probably pig out without even gaining a pound, extra perk. Besides, no one is going to attack us on a cruise ship. It'll be fine."

She still looked like I'd gone batshit crazy but she started laughing, "Just when I think I can't love you more, you go do something like this."

I winked at her, "It's part of my whole devil may care charm. Kept me sane for years, so, shall we look?"

"Sure, fuck it. Always wanted to take full advantage of an all you can eat buffet."

"That's the spirit."

We spent the next hour looking at prices, destinations and options until Sam knocked on the door. "Dean it's me."

"Come in," I said.

He unlocked the door, walked in looking utterly drained and collapsed in the chair next to the bed. "Talked to Thea and Felicity. We're ready to head back when you are."

I set the phone down, "How'd they take it?"

His eyes dropped to the floor, and not because of the wolf side, "As good as you can expect I guess. They're freaked out but sticking by Oliver and Roy."

"Sam..." I could tell him it wasn't his fault but it wouldn't matter. Just like it never mattered when people told me it wasn't my fault all the times he'd been hurt or fucked over by something. Roy was his responsibility and Oliver had come because we had asked. Therefore it was on us to fix it. "We will fix this. I promise."

"What if we can't?"

I scooted closer to him, put my hand on his shoulder and waited until he raised his eyes to meet mine. "Since when has can't ever been a word that applied to us."

He didn't say anything at first, "Yeah, but we've never had great luck fixing other people, just us. Dean..."

I knew he was thinking about Madison, hell I was thinking about Kate and Garth. "We have more resources and more knowledge now then we did back then. We will set this straight. Have faith."

I couldn't tell if that comment pissed him off or confused him, it felt like a bit of both, looked like it too. "Faith? What the hell are you talking about?"

"We've got an angel on our side and we're going to talk to Death among other things. They'll all know as soon as they see us that we're not human. You think Crowley or Death want us to be even harder to kill? Come on. Who knows, Crowley may take one look at us and just give us a way to fix it. Can you imagine the look on his face when he sees us?"

That got a nasty smile on his face, "You know, this may not be such a bad thing after all."

"Yeah, kind of nice to be closer to having an even playing field isn't it?"

"If I have to be a monster, I guess it'd be nice to be one that other monsters are scared of."

Because when it came down to it, we'd always been two humans that had somehow managed to scare the shit out of things that really had no right to be scared of us. Add this little twist it and who knows what things it could shake loose. When the powers that be fuck with you, only thing to do is make them regret it. Sort of my unspoken motto in life.


	40. Research and Understanding

We made it back to the Bunker and saw a beat up late seventies Toyota truck parked in front.

"Why can't he steal anything with class?" I grumbled. "It's like he has no sense of style at all."

"You are aware he's been wearing the same clothes almost a decade now, right?" Sam pointed out.

"Well yeah, but still. I mean, he could at least try."

"Uh huh, sure. Angels don't seem to be big on aesthetics."

"Gabriel had style," I reminded him as we got out of Baby.

"And how many eons had Gabriel been away from Heaven by the time we met him?

"Yeah but that just shows there could be hope for Cas."

Sam didn't even try to reply to that. He just gave me a skeptical look, walked down the stairs and opened the door.

"Sam? Dean?" Cas's voice worked it's way up to us.

"Who else has the key?" I said.

He was sitting at the first of the long tables, his coat was torn up, again, but I didn't see any blood anywhere. That was good, what wasn't good was the look on his face when he looked up. His eyes narrowed, then widened in surprise and he got this wary look on his face, "So, your definition of complications is that none of you, except Diggle, are still human."

"Pretty much. Any ideas on how to fix that?"

"Dean...," he shook his head, "I've just now seen you," he kind of snapped, "I don't even know what you are. You're not the standard werewolf. Why, exactly, would I know how to fix you?"

He turned more to look at us, that's when I saw the blood, not sure why I hadn't smelled it. Guess angel blood doesn't smell, which kind of makes sense I guess. "You okay?"

He looked down at his shirt, "Yes, I was resting up some before I got rid of the stains."

I took a better look at him, he didn't look all that great. "What happened?"

"I evaded capture, that's all. It's nothing that concerns you."

He's always been close mouthed about Heaven, I'd push him for more information later. "All right, well here's what we found it." I filled him in on everything and the plan Sam and I had come up with. Oliver and the rest took seats around the table while I talked.

"No." Was all he said when I stopped talking.

"Uh, no what?"

"If any angel is going into Purgatory it will be me." There wasn't an ounce of hesitation in his voice, or willingness to compromise, "We will see what Death and Crowley say, if it is required that someone has to go to Purgatory to close the portal, I will. And no, there will not be any discussion of that. Are we clear?"

"You've done your time down there, we all have," Sam protested. "There are other things that can do this, Dean made the point that all of us have more than done our share of saving the world. It's their turn."

Cas straightened in his chair and stared right at Sam. Now normally, that's not an issue, but it turns out any challenge to us and the wolf side gets pissy. Sam started growling, I kept a lid on my wolf with Coyote's help.

"Sam! Look away!" I ordered. Sam stopped his growls, lowered his eyes and gripped the table for a second.

"Sorry Cas. That wasn't me."

"I know," Cas said, "However, it is because of me that Dean was dragged into Purgatory, therefore allowing the monsters to figure out a way to escape."

"Bullshit," I said, "Benny knew exactly how to get out, he told me about the portal and how to use it. I doubt he was the only one down there who had a clue. He never said when the portal opened, he just said he knew we could get out. So it could have been there the whole time. That's why we need answers, with all the archangels gone and God absent as usual, we're hoping Death or Crowley know. No way in hell am we're asking Metatron, I trust his ass even less than Crowley."

"Who's Metatron?" Roy asked.

"Scribe of God," Cas replied, "Who used me to destroy Heaven and cast out the angels."

Roy'd learned by now when to not ask for more details, "Oh, okay."

It was pretty obvious he still had no clue but I wasn't going to fill him in, we had other things to do. "Look, before we get all up close and personal with my least favorite people, we need to find an easy hunt for Coyote and the rest. We don't want them anywhere near Death and the rest, plus they need to practice not wolfing out when in sketchy situations."

"It seems you do as well," Cas pointed out.

"That's why you're staying here," Sam said, "Dean or I grow fur at the wrong time, knock us both out. We're pretty sure Coyote can keep Oliver and Roy in check. Dig can go with them too. That may help."

Cas thought it over and nodded, "Seems to be a decent plan."

He kept giving us the super-intent Cas look. I love feeling like I'm under a microscope, really I do. "Anything making more sense the more you stare at us?"

"Not as of yet. I am trying to observe all the changes in you, and there are many. It's fascinating."

"Great."

Sam pulled his laptop out, fired it up and started searching. "This could take awhile, you all may as well get comfy. Hauntings are hard to track down. Not a lot of hunters look for them so not sure I can find one that I can try to take from someone else. Most hunters stick with things that kill more people and are easier to find."

"I have my laptop too," Roy chimed in, "I'll help."

Oliver looked around, this was really not his scene, "What can Dig and I do?"

"Research werewolves and Fenris," Sam replied, "I'll write down the sections that you should go to. I've changed things over the last year. Dean can show you how to find them all. Cas and Coyote can help too. Once you get a stack of books, Dean can help look on the site, I've added a lot of diaries from the Men of Letters, so maybe one of them other than Magnus has some theories."

"Sounds good," I said, "You guys go pick out some rooms while Sam's writing all that down."

"All right," Roy said, "I'll show them all the empty ones."

"Thanks."

They grabbed their bags and followed Roy, Sam wrote out his list of books and once they all got back I led them to the various shelves and started shoving books into their hands.

"All of these are on werewolves?" Dig said after I stacked the fourth book into his arms, Roy and Oliver already had a full load.

"Nope, all of those have references to werewolves buried somewhere in them." I pointed to the stacks in Roy and Oliver's arms, "Those are on were-anything, not just werewolves and are mostly hypothetical theories," Then I pointed to the ones I had been putting on the floor as we went, those would be my load. "Those are on Fenris and Norse mythology and the ones Coyote has are werewolf specific. This is about half the list. When we're done with these we get more. I'm not sure what all Sam has in the database he's been working on but he and I will probably be at that for a few hours at least."

Dig looked down the shelves of books then back at me. "And everything in here is about something supernatural, or spells, or whatever."

"They were called the Men of Letters, it wasn't just a catchy phrase to put on a shirt. There was a reason behind it."

"I can see that."

He had that look, reality was crashing into all the horror movies and supernatural things he'd ever read or heard about. It was one thing for him to hear whatever we'd told him but seeing row upon row of books about these things written by men who'd been studying this shit for years was something else. Beheading vamps and shooting werewolves was just the tip of the iceberg.

Oliver looked less than excited about the prospect of sitting for hours flipping page after page. I knew that feeling all too well. It took years for me to really enjoy research, that had always been Sam's thing. I'd do it, and do a good job at it, didn't mean I liked it.

"Let's get at it," I said as I set the last book on Dig's stack, "They won't read themselves. Oh, and a lot of this crap may be in Latin, when you see that, or any other random language, ask Sam, Cas or I to translate."

"You know Latin?" Oliver asked.

"Yup, comes with the job. Hunting is one of the few careers that still uses dead languages. Hell, Bobby, the man who pretty much raised us, knew a ton of languages; Japanese, Chinese, Latin even some Spanish. Monsters are in every culture around the world so it helps to know as many languages as you can. Sam and I are spoiled though, we have Cas, he's kind of a universal translator."

We'd gotten back to the tables and set the books down, they all picked one to start diving in to while I grabbed Sam's old laptop and settled in.

Five hours later and no one had found anything, not that I was surprised. The lore on Fenris was all pretty basic and none of it referenced him creating werewolves, all the lore we had on werewolves was stuff we already knew. There were some more hints in a few of the diaries about different species of wolves but they were all still supposedly affected by silver, we weren't. Oliver had been getting more and more restless, Roy seemed to be losing hope. Coyote was taking it in stride, she knew how this worked. Oddly, Dig seemed to enjoy reading through all the information. Maybe he was some sort of history buff or bookworm,either that or the fact that this was brand new for him made it exciting. Cas, well he was just Cas and Sam hadn't really said a word outside of when the others asked for help with some of the language. He was hyper focused on finding a hunt.

I decided to call a break, "All right, food break. Sam? The menus still in the same place?"

He nodded, "Yeah, the Chinese place closed, there's a new bar-b-que place there though. It's not too bad."

"Damn! That Chinese place had the best kung pao chicken."

"I know. Sucks." His eyes were still locked onto the screen.

"Man, oh well." I dug the menus out of the drawer where we'd always kept them and tossed them onto the table. No one reached for them. "Uh huh, okay let me rephrase. We need to eat, I'm hungry and I can tell you guys are too. I know you're tired, frustrated, worried and scared. I get it, trust me, but all of us have been in fucked up situations..."

"No Dean," Oliver interrupted, the iron control he'd been keeping on his emotions started to slip, "Not like this. I've spent the last five hours reading about the horrors that werewolves commit, about how they are and fucked up situation doesn't even begin to cover this. Are we going to go primal on the full moon and have no memory of what we do? Do you know? Nothing in these books tells us that. Five hours we've sat here and we still don't have any idea of what we really are!" He barely stopped himself from hitting the table as he stood up, "We've spent hours researching and we still have nothing to go on! Are we supposed to just accept that we can feel each other's emotions? That you or Coyote could order me to do something and I'd have no choice? That there's this other being inside of me? Well? What if we lose it around people we love? Then what? Should we just have Thea and Felicity move here so we can keep watch over each other 24/7?"

The more questions he asked, the more panicky he got, can't say I blame him. He'd done a damn good job of holding it together so far, it was bound to all burst out at some point or other. "Short answer? No, I don't know about the full moon. The rest of the things you asked before the last one? Yes. The last one? It's a possibility, or maybe Sam, Coyote and I move out to Starling." He really didn't like that answer, "We accept it because right now that's our only option."

"Dean's right," Sam chimed in, "You know how long it took for Dean and I to find an answer for the Mark, and we found it completely by chance. Our Father spent close to thirty years looking for the demon that killed our Mom. You accept it, but you never, ever quit trying to find an answer. Accept, adapt, learn everything we can and never give up. That's the only way we get through this." He got up, walked around the table and stood directly in front of Oliver, "I got you into this, I asked for your help, I will not rest until I get answers for you, for all of us. We will find a way back to being human again, I swear."

Utter determination fueled by guilt and a desperate need to make things right soared through all of us thanks to the pack bond. I knew how Sam was, how I was, when it came to these things, but the others didn't really have the slightest clue until right then. Sure, they'd seen us during that ritual and they'd gotten to know Sam over the last year but the bond was a window into all of our deepest feelings.

I could tell the moment Oliver felt it, his entire body language shifted. I wouldn't say he calmed down, it was more along the lines of him finding an anchor, something to hold onto. "I know," Oliver said, "I just..."

"Don't worry about it," Sam interrupted, "If Dean and I hadn't been through all the shit we have over the years we'd be freaking out too. Trust me, we've done plenty of freaking out in the past. Let's get some food and take a break."

Oliver nodded and sat back down, "Sure."

There was another reason I'd called a break, "Sam, just get my usual from where ever you order from. I'm going to go work on Baby a bit since she's got all those holes in her. Cas? Why don't you come help? Haven't seen you in a year, may as well catch up."

"I haven't been doing anything out of..." he started to say, then he paused, and I could see him process what I was really saying, "Oh, oh course, yes. I'll come help."

Coyote shot me a quick look, I shook my head, Cas wouldn't open up if she was there. She got the hint and picked up a menu. He opened the garage door, I pulled Baby in, got out, leaned on her roof and dove right in. "So, they didn't believe you were banished?"

He shifted his weight, but instead of getting that usual Cas answering uncomfortable questions look, his face went completely blank, "I have been exiled, therefore the method of my ending up in Heaven does not enter into things. I thought you wished to discuss your situation, not mine."

"Cas, last time I saw you, you weren't exiled. It's been years since the Leviathan clusterfuck, so what changed over the last year? I've been out of the loop but I'm pretty sure Sam would have mentioned a major event, like if you wiped out more angels or went into destruco-god mode again somehow."

"It doesn't..."

That did it, "Don't pull that crap with me, I'm not into the whole hiding shit from people I care about thing much anymore. Sam said he had no clue you'd been exiled. Why?"

The blank face slipped and I didn't like what I saw when it did, Cas had lost hope. Not good.

"Because his knowledge of the situation would in no way change it. It would upset him and I saw no reason to do that. He had enough concerns as it was. The only reason I told you was to explain why I could not help like I had in the past. If it hadn't been for that, you would not know either."

"Right, I'll come back to why that was a completely idiotic thing to do in a minute. Why are you exiled?"

His face hardened again, "For my past transgressions. That is all."

"It took them this long to get around to that? Not buying it."

"It is up to you to choose what you believe. I have other, more useful things I could be doing than having this discussion with you." Complete monotone delivery, he was pissed off. He turned around and started walking towards the door.

Cas only gets like that over things or people he cares about, "Who'd you sacrifice yourself for?"

He froze, his back went from ramrod straight and stiff to slumped forward in about a half a second. "Stop asking Dean, please."

"So, I'm right. Angel politics again. For fuck's sake!"

"Dean!" He snapped, "There were reasons."

"Reasons for you to get screwed over by your own kind again? Jesus Cas, why? Why do you keep taking it in the ass for Heaven? When was the last time they helped us?"

He spun around and I knew that I'd pushed too far. His eyes were glowing and a pretty serious gust of wind swept through the place.

"I took one in the ass, as you say, for the same reasons you and Sam do. To save my home and my family. It does not concern you. I am not unleashing dark forces into the world, as you and Sam have repeatedly, my exile affects me and only me. This is the last we will speak of it. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal clear, you sacrifice, your "family" treats you like shit and you can't even see your home anymore. Funny thing about Sam and I though, end of the day, we still have each other, can still walk out the front door and see the people we saved. It was Hannah wasn't it? This was your compromise for her staying in charge."

I didn't get a reply, but his eyes dimmed and the wind faded.

"Yeah, thought so. You realize that this won't stop them from fighting, they'll find something to be pissed off about. For angels, they're a shit ton like us humans. They just can't get along."

"Yes, that may be, but at least they are no longer fighting because of me. I've done everything I can to heal the wounds I caused in Heaven..." he paused, "well almost everything."

Those last words were whispered which set off all kinds of alarms in my head, "Cas? Don't you dare go there."

His eyes were empty of all emotion, not in the bad ass soldier Cas kind of way either. "We aren't accomplishing anything. If you don't wish to talk about ways to deal with the monsters escaping Purgatory or the fact that you are a werewolf, I'll return to the books. I saw some more references..."

"Stop." I interrupted as I walked around Baby and blocked the way back to the door into the Bunker. "Castiel, I could care less about being a werewolf right now, the monsters are getting taken care of, the rest Sam and I will handle later. Do you know the most important thing I've learned living with Coyote?"

He shook his head.

"That not talking will destroy you. So, this is what is going to happen. You're going to go sit on that stool and start talking. I don't give a shit if you think it's pointless, you're a wreck."

"There's nothing to say."

"Really?" I keep my eyes locked onto his. It took a minute or so but the emptiness faded and spiraled into sadness. "I owe you a saving or two, right? We've got nothing but time."

I'd seen Cas on the edge of defeat a time or two before, seen him push himself to the limits of his Grace and beyond, but I'd never seen him look so lost and alone. His eyes slid away from mine as he turned around, slowly shuffled to the stool and sat down. "I only wanted to help, that's all I have ever wanted to do." His voice cracked, "Just help my brothers and sisters, be a loyal angel, save Heaven and humans from Lucifer. How did it get so complicated?"

I sat down next to him, put my arm around his shoulders and listened to an angel who'd done more to save the world and Heaven than any other angel or God out there pour out his pain at being punished for doing his job when no one else would.


	41. An Answer or Two

I don't think anyone, ever, had just listened to Cas. I know I never had, which was pretty fucked up now that I think about it. I'd prayed to him, yelled at him, begged him for help, joked with him but I never did the one thing that he'd always done for me, listen. We'd both always been more the screw talking, solve the problem and move on type of people, or angels and it was pretty obvious to me now that we'd talked past and around each other for years. He started out talking about things I knew about, things that had happened since we'd known each other, but it didn't take all that long for him to start referring to things he'd done years and years ago.

Stories of his garrison, Balthazar and the rest. What they'd been like in what passed for happier times in Heaven. When they all still thought God actually cared about them, that they knew the plan, knew their roles, or did until Sam and I came along and threw a wrench into things. How many times they'd protected each other in battle against demons, the orders that they'd carried out without ever really knowing why. What they'd understood as love, but what he'd since realized was just fear. Fear of Father, fear of falling, fear of being cast out. How he'd always felt that something was off, even before Sam and I, but that he never felt that he questioned out of a need to rebel, but a need to understand, see the larger picture. Then when he did, well, truth very rarely sets anyone free. That's a line of bullshit to make all of us who've gotten burned by the truth feel like we've gained something. We haven't, but at least we can sound all wise and deep.

The more he talked, the clearer it got how desperate he'd been over the last few years. It's not like the whole sucking up all the Leviathans in Purgatory was a move someone who had hope in a positive outcome would make. It was kind of his version of the Mark of Cain. I'd been at pretty much rock bottom when I went right past the user agreement on that. I just checked that "I accept" box, gave Cain my arm and powered right on through.

Cas in a lot of ways has it so much worse than I ever did though. He'd been crammed in a physical body that wasn't even his true form for years now. He'd gone from being one of the most powerful things out there, to a mere human, to stealing Grace from his fellow angels, then getting most of his mojo back, then losing one of the main things that made him who and what he was, his wings, and through it all he'd been on the run from the only beings that could really understand him. Sam and I will never be able to relate to him like another angel could, and now he couldn't even talk to them much less go back to Heaven.

And what had he gotten for all his troubles? Sam and I will die at some point, well maybe not as soon now, but still, it's bound to happen. Once we do, who would he have left? What would be his mission? His reason for still roaming the earth. What bugged the crap out of me was I had no answers for him, nothing I could say that wouldn't sound totally lame. Was he supposed to spend eternity hunting monsters? Sure, he'd be saving people but for him that wasn't exactly a challenging or rewarding career. I mean, he can just walk up and kill the damn things with the touch of his hand.

About an hour into our talk the garage door opened. Sam walked in with a couple of carry out bags in his hands, "Here you go. I doubled up on the usual order." I'd shifted positions so that I was leaning against Baby watching Cas talk, which meant my back was to the door so Sam couldn't really see Cas or I. I turned to look at Sam and as soon as he saw Cas and I he slowed down. "Uh, everything okay?"

Cas wasn't exactly in tears but he wasn't hiding how upset he was, "I am not sure. Dean insisted I sit down and start talking,and well, for some reason I haven't been able to stop."

"It's called venting Cas," I said, "You're way overdo for it. Remember when I asked about depressed angels?" I asked Sam.

"Yeah? Oh."

He set the bags on Baby's hood, sat down on the stool that I'd vacated and looked at Cas. "Why didn't you tell me you'd been exiled? You've spent weeks at a time here. I knew something was up."

"I didn't want to burden you."

Sam's eyebrows crinkled, "Whoa, what? Since when have you been a burden on us? It's kind of usually been the other way around hasn't it? I mean, with all the times we've asked you for help, sort of seems like it's long past our turn to help you out."

Cas sort of shrugged, "Yes, but that was what I was created to do. Help humans, not trouble them with my problems."

Sam frowned, then gave me this intent stare and I felt something shift in the pack bond, _"Can you hear me?"_

 _"Yeah, which is not at all freaky or anything."_

 _"Shut up. How bad is he?"_

 _"Bad. It's not just recent stuff, goes way back. He's lost Sam, way lost."_ I kind of crammed all my thoughts about what Cas had been saying together and basically threw them at him.

" _Damn. Okay."_

The bond started to quiver or whatever again, like Sam was disentangling himself from my brain, " _Wait, why'd you think of this whole telepathy thing?"_

 _"Mairyn got inside Rick's head, she was more dominant than he was, Fenris got into your head and said it was for the same reason. We talked mind to mind in wolf form and since I'm technically higher ranking than you I thought it'd be worth a try."_

 _"Yeah, well don't get all egotistical about that. I'm still the older brother here."_

His face didn't show it but I heard the smugness, " _The older brother that needs his fiance's help to pull rank on me now."_

 _"I hate this. I really, really do."_

"What are you two doing?" Cas asked. "You're staring rather intently at each other and I can see something in your energies changing."

"Dean was catching me up on your conversation. Turns out the werewolf thing comes with telepathy."

"Which is also not normal," Cas chose to point out.

"Yeah we know," I said, "Wolf talk later." I knew that Cas wouldn't want to keep going, not that he had issues with Sam, but the tone of the conversation had shifted. Sam knew it too.

"Cas, listen," Sam said, "You will never be a burden on either of us. I'll go and let you guys keep talking. I didn't mean to interrupt anything but if Dean's not around and you need to vent, I'll always be here for you. All right?"

Cas doesn't usually start hugs, but this time he did. It was awkward, but then it's Cas. He pulled Sam close for a second, let him go and a hint of a smile finally showed up on his face, "Thank you Sam."

Sam returned the smile, "Sure thing." Then he got up and walked past me. The bond did it's weird quivery thing again, _"Tell me everything else that he says. I'm worried."_

" _Got it, right there with you. Anything on the hunt front?"_

 _"Maybe. Let me handle that, keep Cas talking for as long as you can. This is more important than him reading through lore right now."_

 _"All right."_ Then that sense of Sam in my head was gone again. Just when I thought it couldn't get more weird.

Cas watched Sam leave the turned his gaze back to me. "You two are handling this "complication" much better than I would expect."

I shrugged and started digging into the bags, "It's not that big of a deal in the overall scheme of shit that could go wrong. Well that and we're more focused on helping the rest of them deal with it. To be honest, it's not really bothering me. When we talked to the other wolves and Fenris I got the impression that as long as we keep our heads on straight we should be all right. The sharper senses are kind of cool and knowing that nothing can really hurt us now will make hunting a lot less stressful for Sam, I won't have to worry so much about him."

"And Coyote?"

"She's holding it together. We talked about it already. Thing is Cas, if this is what we're going to be, I'll take it over all the other options for being a monster that I've ever seen." I took a bite of one of the burritos Sam had gotten for me, he'd made a good choice. The Bunker was coincidentally five miles away from the best Mexican food in Kansas, not that that's saying a lot but still. After I got that bite down I figured I may as well ask again, "So, since you haven't offered a solution to the whole wolf thing I'm figuring you don't have one."

"It's not that I don't, I'm just not sure it would end well." He looked way too uncertain about it for my liking.

"Why?"

"Fenris said he gave you part of himself, and that all of you and he are connected somehow correct?"

"That's how I understood it."

"I think the wolf side you keep referring to is actually a separate entity created by the merging of Fenris' energy and yours. The walls of color you described, the trials of pain and attempts to force you to turn back was a test set up by Fenris to see if those he chose to give his gift to were worthy of it. Once you burst through the last wall and awoke that was the birth of the new entity, that conflict was it's attempt to be fully formed into a separate being. All of you proved that you were strong enough to retain control of this new creation and so the wolf side was relegated to a support role within you. It seems that it's main desire is to protect it's and therefore your life."

"All right, so?" As soon as I asked I had a sinking feeling about what the answer was going to be.

"It's the wolf side that restored you to life, it's energy is what healed you. I fear that if I were to attempt to remove it, you may not survive."

"Are you saying we're walking corpses?"

"Not entirely no. What I am saying is that without Fenris' gift, the damage you received from the wolves in the cave may come back. It's similar to when a demon or an angel possess a vessel. We absorb and heal any damage to the vessel. It doesn't mean that the vessel is not still harmed. When angels vacate a vessel voluntarily we always make sure that the body is fully restored, but I am not sure that Fenris' gift works that way. Even if it did, me going in and trying to remove it forcefully would hardly be a voluntary surrender on it's part. It may fight me and I have no idea what that would do to you. It may be more like what happens with demons. The gift is filling in the gaps to keep you moving and breathing. You are not possessed the way we usually speak about possession. Fenris is not lurking somewhere in your mind able to take over at any moment, however, his gift is what absorbed the wounds and healed you. Without it..."

"We could die."

"Yes."

"But you could heal us right?"

The corners of his eyes wrinkled, never a good sign, that usually meant he was calculating odds and they weren't good. "The amount of Grace I would have to expend to separate just one of you out may be beyond even me. Fenris may not be a god per se but he's very powerful, at least from what I can see. That and for all I know you could die instantly, remember I am no longer able to just go to Heaven and retrieve your souls, if that is even where you would go. You may end up in Purgatory and then..."

"Yeah, because giving Leviathans another crack at us is such a great idea. We barely made it out last time. Damn."

"I'm sorry Dean."

"Don't worry about it, at least we have some kind of answer now." I took another bite, Cas looked away and stared off into space. If I was to guess I'd say he was feeling pretty weird about having opened up so much. I used to do the same thing when Coyote and I had our hours long talks when I first moved in with her. "Hey, how about you do your angel mechanic thing and pull those bullets out of Baby's side. Then we can start getting rid of holes."

"You know I can make the holes go away too."

"Yeah, and you know I don't like that whole concept. I want to make sure it's done right."

He gave me a slightly offended look, "I have never repaired anything incorrectly in my life. I'm an angel, not an amateur. I'd be fixing her on a molecular level, which, to be perfectly honest, is a much more correct and lasting repair than that bonding substance you use."

"That's only temporary, I'll get a whole new panel for her later. Then her molecules will be perfectly aligned again."

"Wouldn't it just be easier..."

"Cas, it's simple, rules are, when Baby gets broken I fix her. That's it."

"You realize how completely inconsistent you're being. You have no problem allowing me to do something as complicated as restore you and Sam to full health, or even bring your souls back from another realm, yet you won't let me do something as insignificant as fixing a few holes in the side of your car."

"Exactly, you have your thing, I have mine. Now are you helping or not?"

He sighed, ran his hand alongside Baby and handed me the bullets. "Here."

"Thanks, that'll save me some time."

Apparently he didn't think that was worthy of an actual reply, he just got up, dug around in some cabinets till he found all the supplies I'd need to fix her, brought them back, set them on the ground and pulled off his coat, "You eat. Since you won't let me help out doing "my thing", at least allow me to help out doing it your way. Just tell me what I need to do."

Funny how working on a car can make even an angel feel better.


	42. Rounding Out The Day

He didn't actually do too bad of a job for his first time. We did the rough work on a few of them but really didn't talk too much more about anything important. He needed a break from reality and this was the only thing I could think of to get his mind off his problems that got him some space from everyone else. Maybe Sam and I should try to find some sort of hobby for Cas, something he could do that had nothing to do with anything angelic in nature. Although I had no idea what that would be.

Once we got done cleaning and prepping the third hole I figured we should probably get back inside, or at least I should. I could feel the growing unease from the rest of them as time kept passing without answers. I'd delayed not just for Cas but because I knew that what he'd told me about the whole wolf thing wouldn't go over all that well. I'd kept trying to find a way to phrase it so it didn't sound as final as I knew it would but no matter how I worded it in my head, the facts were the facts. For the foreseeable future we were going to have a furry side, a pack bond and whatever wierdness was going to come along with it.

I set down the tools I was working working with and stood up, "May as well get this over with."

Cas had known me long enough to make the jump with me. "I can explain it if you would like, perhaps that would make things less upsetting. They're liable to want to ask questions anyway."

"Sure, let me give them the brief run-up then you can delve into all the ethereal theory."

He stood up, put his coat back on and looked at me, "Do you think you'll end up relocating to Starling City? It seems that would be easier for Oliver and Roy. They have deep roots there."

For some reason that got my back up a bit, "Well, Coyote's got deep roots back home and I'd been settling down there too."

He got the hint, "Oh, of course. I'm sorry. I just don't know her all that well. Sam told me she'd been a hunter so I just assumed she was like you and Sam were."

"That was a long time ago and only for a few years. She wasn't born into it like we were. She actually knows what a normal life is." And I really wanted to get back to that somehow, and do it sooner rather than later. "But to answer your question, I have no idea. Let's go."

When we made it back to the main room the tension in the air was even worse than when Cas and I'd left. I could feel Coyote and Sam trying to help the others stay calm, but it was getting kind of dicey. They were just about through another set of books that had been set on the table. "You all can quit looking for now. I doubt we'll find anything useful. Cas has some ideas, none of which you'll like. I don't think any hunters or Men of Letters ever came across critters like us. I'll let Cas fill you in on what he thinks, but remember, Cas didn't know how to get rid of the Mark either. So this isn't us quitting, this is just getting a better handle on the situation. Cas? Go for it."

He nodded and started talking. I joined with Sam and Coyote on flooding the pack bond with some sense of calm, mainly because I had a feeling Coyote wouldn't be so calm after she heard all this and it'd probably throw Sam off for a minute or two as well. Cas barely gotten through the explanation of how we actually had a separate being inside of us when Roy's fear spiked way high, Oliver was throttling his emotions back until Cas was all the way done. Coyote kind of surprised me, she looked and felt more like Cas was confirming a theory she'd already come up with. Sam, like Coyote, was riding it out, processing it. I wasn't linked to Dig but it seemed like he was just happy that we were getting some sort of answer, even if it was a crappy one.

Once Cas finished the room was dead silent. Roy's eyes were huge, Oliver was pondering, Coyote was staring off into the distance and Sam merely nodded once.

Dig leaned forward, set his elbows on the table and rested his chin on the top of fists, "So, until further notice, this is how things are going to be."

"Yeah."

"We're like hosts to some sort of creature?" Roy asked.

"Not at all Roy," Cas answered, "It's more like you have become a new creation. A hybrid version of human and semi-divine being if you like."

"Chosen ones," Coyote said, "Many religions and belief systems have stories about followers that were gifted something extra by their deities. That's basically what Fenris did."

That explained why she'd taken Cas's theory a lot calmer than I thought she would. She'd believed Fenris was one of her guides, although that wasn't exactly accurate any longer, he wasn't just a Native spirit after all, he also hadn't steered us wrong. We'd managed to kill Mairyn when nothing else seemed to be able to. The fact that I'd gotten shot point blank with silver and it had barely hurt told me everything I needed to know on how tough we were now.

"If it helps," Sam added, "You can think of us a meta-humans, like Flash. If you look at it that way, it's not quite as difficult to accept."

I'd forgotten about Flash. That was a good way to look at it, especially for Roy and Oliver.

Oliver had gone into analytical mode, which was a lot better than panic mode. "So, now what?" He asked.

"We stick to the plan, you guys go hunt and get used to this while Sam and I bully Death and the King of Hell into helping us out on the Purgatory problem. After that, we'll see. I'd imagine a lot of it will be based on how distance affects this pack bond thing. If you get back to Starling and can't stay in control, one of us will have to relocate. My honest opinion? Oliver, you're too damn stubborn to let something control you. Roy? Once you get over the shock of this you'll be fine. Look at this as a weapon, not a hindrance. You'll be able to hear or smell anything coming at you, you can't be killed by anything you'll come across in most fights in Starling, the bond will make it even easier to move as a team and Sam figured out we can talk mind to mind even in human form. There's really not a lot of downsides here that I can see. Remember what the other wolves said, Fenris' gift was designed to help them live, not take them over and destroy them. You have a new tool to fight crime with, use it."

They mulled that over.

"You have a point," Oliver finally said, then looked at his watch. "It's been a long day. I'm going to check in with Felicity and try to get some sleep."

"You okay?" I asked.

"Whether or not I am doesn't change the situation." He didn't say anything else as he walked down the hall. He'd somehow managed to either calm down or block out his panic so it felt like he had. He'd probably wake up in the morning and have it hit that this wasn't just some bad dream. A lot of times the morning after shit like this happens is a lot worse than the day it does.

I turned my attention back to Roy, of the two, I was more worried about Roy than Oliver. "How you holding up?"

He slid the book he'd been looking towards the center of the table and stared at the table top, not any of us. "Sam's point about Flash helps I guess. I mean, I knew there was a chance this could happen when I started hunting but, I guess I never really thought all that much about it. We're always so careful. This just happened so fast, I..."

"You've been damn lucky with Sam watching out for you," I told him, "He's been able to steer you clear of hunts that could go sideways like this one did."

"Yeah I know," he said, "I'll be okay. I don't have any other choice. There's still work for us to do. I just need time to process it I guess."

"We all do," Sam stated, "Go get some rest, we'll double down on finding a hunt tomorrow so you guys can get moving again. That'll help."

"Yeah, all right."

He felt a lot shakier than Oliver, but he was working his way through it. As soon as he was gone I grabbed some beers from the fridge, handed them out to everyone and sat back down. "Wonder if we'll burn through alcohol like we do food. Would kind of suck not being able to get buzzed at all anymore."

Dig shook his head and smiled, "I love how you manage to always keep your priorities straight Dean."

"Hey, these are important things to know."

There wasn't a lot more to say, we drank our beers in relative silence. Dig finished his off first and got up, "I'll dump Oliver's rental tomorrow and report it stolen, may as well tie up that loose end just in case. You guys should get some rest too. I think we'll have the easier part of this, hell, we'll just be hunting ghosts or whatever. Hope you can get the powers that be to step up and make sure this monster thing goes away."

"Thanks," Sam said. "See you in the morning."

"Night." He followed Oliver and Roy and disappeared down the hall.

I thought back over the day, it was about nine at night, which is pretty early for any of us to be hitting the hay but we'd all been through a lot.

Cas spoke up, "I'll keep looking and reading. I think you should do as Dig suggested."

I wasn't going to argue the point, "Yeah, probably a good idea."

Sam nodded, "All right, night then. If you find anything..."

Cas interrupted with a smile, "I'll tell you immediately."

"Thanks Cas."

"Of course."

The three of us cleaned up the take out stuff, tossed our empty bottles in the recycle bin and made our way to the rooms. Sam got to his first, gave us a quick nod and went in. Coyote wrapped her hand around mine once we were alone in the hallway.

"You all right honey?"

She didn't say anything, her emotions were all jumbled up as well. I didn't push her. As soon as we got to our room she went into the bathroom, pulled the mirror off the wall, carried it into our room and leaned it against the back wall. I shut our door, she undressed and crouched down in front of the mirror without saying a word.

"Honey?"

"I have to see," she answered and started shifting.

I don't know if she was shifting slower than before or if it just seemed that way because I didn't have anything else distracting me. She forced down any real screams of pain as her legs twisted and shortened, becoming much more muscled while completely reversing how they bend at the ankle and knee. Her arms gained muscle as well, along with paws and claws that flexed and retracted as she panted and whimpered.

Her shoulders shifted in direction, so did her hips so they could support four legs instead of arms and legs, then a tail started sprouting out of her lower back. The face and head was the worst to watch, her features became hideously distorted and unrecognizable as they changed from human to wolf, fangs sliced into her lower lip as they grew. I forced myself to keep watching, I knew that this was her way of making all of this real to her.

That long black hair I love so much seemed to fall away and disappear as the silvery gray fur sprouted and covered her entire body. I wished the fur grew in first because watching her entire skeleton re-align would look a lot less painful if it did. I saw and heard every single bone crack and move, not a one escaped some sort of change.

What was weird was that I had felt her pain when she'd been injured but I didn't feel the pain of this. I don't think she was blocking or anything, for some reason it just didn't transfer along the bond, which was probably a good thing since the wolf side responded to pain. If we felt it every time one of us changed we'd have a lot harder time staying sane.

After she was a fully formed wolf she stared at her reflection in the mirror as she moved her ears around and bared her fangs. I thought she was just as gorgeous with fur as without. I sank down on the floor next to her and put my arm over her back.

" _I remember when I was a kid how I loved the stories of people being able to turn into animals. I thought it would be the most amazing thing ever._ _It's so confusing_ , _I feel like me, but I'm covered in fur and walking on four legs."_

 _"_ Well, you're still you. The outside doesn't matter and the whole wolf thing just seems to be an add on, not something that's changing who we really are. At least so far and all the other wolves we talked to still seemed to be who they were as humans. Sam didn't seem to pick up on any difference with Tom and the rest."

" _True."_ She examined her paws and flexed her claws several times, then stood up and checked out her profile.

"You're still hot as hell as far as I'm concerned. Bright side, when it gets cold back home we've got built in fur suits now. Save on the heating bills."

She did a wolf version of a facepalm, guess that would be a facepaw in her current form, " _You just complimented a wolf while discussing energy saving measures. The wonders never cease."_

"Hold on." I stripped and shifted form while she watched. Once I was done I met her eyes, there was a slight compulsion to look away from her eyes but I pushed it away and she didn't get pissed off about it. " _Two legs or four, we're the same people, same souls, just the outside is different. When you're off hunting with Roy and Oliver, especially Roy, you need to get them to understand that. I have a feeling that if they don't it won't end well. I've been mulling over what Cas, Fenris and my Warrior Spirit said. The first thing my Warrior Spirit said was that I had to accept this new side, incorporate it, if not, I'd go nuts. You, Sam and I have a lot more experience with these things, we'll all be fine. Those two don't. You have to help them or we may lose them."_

She nodded, " _I'll take care of it. Do you have an actual plan on how to get Death and Crowley to help out?"_

 _"Course not, we never do."_ She didn't like that answer, " _When dealing with Crowley the only plan that works is find something that he needs that happens to coincide with what we want. Death, all we can do is ask. We don't bully or negotiate with him, we ask, as nicely as possible. He says no, we move on to other options."_

" _All right, you've got more experience with them than I do. We should get some sleep."_

We stared at each other for a minute, then looked at the bed, then back at each other. _"Really don't feel like changing back,"_ I said

" _Yeah, me either. Guess you'll be washing wolf hair off sheets tomorrow."_

We hopped up on the bed, curled up next to each other and I had a random last minute thought before passing out. " _Would have sucked if any of us were allergic to dog hair."_

A paw smacked the back of my head, " _Love you,"_ she said.

" _You too."_

All in all, the least horrific horrific day I'd had. I decided to not think about how much worse things could have been and go to sleep instead.


	43. Prepping For Dinner with Death

A knock woke me up, I meant to say yeah but I barked instead. I'd forgotten I was wearing fur, not skin. Awkward.

Sam's more than mildly confused voice came through the door, "Dean? Coyote?"

Shit.

The door opened and Sam peeked in. His mouth moved once or twice before he actually got any words out. "Um, okay. Not asking."

" _We didn't.."_

He closed his eyes and put his hand out to stop me, "Really, really don't want to know. Really."

Coyote was laughing inside my head, probably Sam's too.

 _"What's up? What time is it?"_

His eyes opened back up, "It's six in the morning, Cas found a decent looking hunt for them to go on. It's in Iowa. Oliver's been up for a few hours, since you're not going he's tracking down a flight. They can get what they need there since it's just a ghost hunt or if Oliver gets a charter they can take gear and save some time."

 _"All right, we'll get dressed and join the party."_

Now that he was over the shock of seeing wolves on a bed instead of people he gave us a more inquisitive look, "You guys all right?"

" _Yes,"_ Coyote answered, " _I had to see the change, see this form. That's why the mirror is leaning against the wall. Dean changed to prove a point. We just didn't feel like changing back before we went to bed."_

"So, you're not going to four legs full time or anything?"

" _No."_ We both said.

" _Thumbs are too useful to do that,"_ I added. " _Don't feel like lapping up my beer."_

Sam decided to give up at that point, "All right, sure, great. I'm going back now." He muttered something else to himself as he turned away and shut the door behind him.

" _What? It's true."_

Coyote just gave me a wolfy smile, jumped off the bed and went into the bathroom. I heard her panting and whimpering as she shifted back, then the shower turned on. I decided to join her so I hopped out of bed, got back on two legs, stepped into the shower and gave her a long hug. She was going to be gone for a few days, which was going to suck but it had to happen. Oddly enough everything that had happened the day before had made me feel more confident that I wouldn't snap or go dark somehow again. I'd hunted, been killed, again, been brought back and got stuck with another jacked up situation but I wasn't losing it, wasn't falling back into old habits and patterns. I was actually okay, which was something I hadn't been in more years than I cared to count.

"Huh," I said as we toweled off after cleaning up.

"What?"

"It just hit me that I made it through all of that without losing it. Not sure if it's the pack bond or just me, either way, I'll take it."

She leaned forward and kissed my cheek. "It's you."

"You sure?" I'd be more than a little shocked if I'd come that far.

"Yes, you've been keeping everyone else calm, not the other way around. We've all been pulling on you and Sam. Shit hit the fan, you took charge, just like you always do. I'm proud of you Babe."

Now that was weird to hear, it felt damn good though. I hadn't heard it all that much in my life.

She pulled me in for another, much longer kiss. Turns out when your psychically bonded with someone you love, it doubles, or maybe even triples how things feel. We were feeling the physical kiss and all the love behind it from both sides, mine and hers. Both our knees buckled and I barely managed to catch her before my ass hit the counter top. Guess this is what they mean by swooning. The room started spinning but I got focused enough to pull back from her. "Wow..."

We were both breathing pretty damn fast. Her hands slid down my sides and I pulled her into me for a second when a really disconcerting thought hit me. "Um, you think they can feel all this?"

Her hands stopped moving and she went from a second away from jumping me to taking a quick step back. "Shit."

"How about we get dressed, go out there and if we get any weird looks we take that as a yes."

"Fuck! If so, this is going to suck ass, big time." She was more than ready to go, so was I but I didn't really want to get any more awkward stares this morning if I could help it.

I slid past her, which was really the last thing I wanted to do, and started to walk into the room to get dressed, "Let's just hope they can't, or maybe distance will make it harder to pick up on things."

"If not, they're going to have to decide. Do they want to deal with feeling us getting it on now and again or me being pissed off and cranky as hell because I can't get any."

"Oliver and Roy both have girlfriends too you know, this won't just be a one way thing."

She joined me in the room and got this really kinky look on her face, "Psychic foursome? Wouldn't be six since Felicity and Thea aren't part of the pack."

"We'd have to find someone for Sam or he'd probably kill all of us."

"I can see that," she said.

We finished getting ready and joined the rest of them.

Sam, Oliver and Cas were sitting around the table, all of them but Cas had coffee. Sam and Oliver looked up as we got closer but there wasn't any hint that they had picked up on Coyote and I barely not having sex. Good.

"Morning all," I said as I went into the kitchen to get coffee for Coyote and I. "Fill us in on this hunt."

"Standard seeming haunting," Sam said, "Old house, people dying in weird ways since a remodel, no forced entry, you know. The usual."

"Do you have a list of deaths in the house?" Coyote asked.

Sam took another drink of coffee and nodded, "Yup, emailed all the important stuff to you and Roy already. Oliver's seen it all too. We're just waiting for Oliver to confirm a flight, if that's the route you all want to take to get there. It'd be faster."

"I'm fine with that."

"I found a small charter outfit close to here," Oliver said, "We can probably take gear with us if need be."

"Even better. Not in the mood for long drives anymore, road trips have sort of lost their appeal over the years."

I'd never say it out loud, because then they'd insist on drugging me to get my ass on a plane, but I wasn't all that keen on driving for hours much these days either. Having a home made me a lot less interested in travel.

Roy and Dig showed up about an hour later, they got all their plans sorted out and Oliver got a flight booked for early afternoon. Dig dumped the trashed rental, we reported it stolen, checked in with Rick and Gerald. Tom and the rest had made it to Rick's place and were settling in. I apologized, kind of, for jumping down their throats. Now that I'd had some time to make a bit more sense of what was going on I made a revised version of the deal. If they wanted to hunt, they hunted with Rick and all together. Anyone started losing it, the whole group would stop and figure something out. They agreed to that, I really had no place to tell people who had been dealing with Fenris' gift for a year or more how to do things.

Gerald and his crew had managed to wipe out the remaining monsters with minimal casualties. He said that he'd managed to get Sean and the other anti-Rick people to cool down once he told them how Rick had saved his life and fought with us, not against us. They'd taken a vote and decided that they were more than happy to not know how jacked up our lives had been and trust us since everything we'd said had been right, plus we'd given them new ways to kill vamps. Hunters are simple people, give them new toys and they'll forgive just about anything.

Sam and I started prepping for summoning Crowley and Death. Sam had run low on some of the stuff we needed and I needed to go buy shit to cook for Death with so we had to make a run into town. I wanted to get the summoning done fairly quick after the rest of them left. Seeing Crowley's face again wasn't all that high on my list of things I ever wanted to do again so the sooner it was over with, the happier I'd be.

We took Sam's car since he hadn't had much chance to drive it yet plus Baby still had some holes in her and headed to the stores, grocery and otherwise.

"You up for this?" Sam asked, "I can do this alone if you want to stay clear of Crowley. You know he'll just try to get at you and try to find out what you've been up to the last year."

It was tempting, but, "You two didn't exact part on friendly terms from what it sounds like."

"So?"

"So? C'mon, you know he won't give us anything if it's just you. Unless you're planning a repeat on the threatening but I'm thinking if you keep pushing at him he'll find some way to "accidentally" break the deal, or just not give a shit anymore. As much as I hate to admit it, Crowley's usually a lot more apt to help me out than you. Even if he's just doing it for his own purposes. Let's play nice, if that doesn't work we can switch it up. To be honest, he may not have a clue about what's happening. Monsters aren't really his thing after all."

"Uh huh, the day Crowley's not aware about something like this is the day I quit hunting. He may not have planned it but you know damn well he's at least heard about it."

"Not even going to let me have a little bit of optimism here are you?"

"No," he replied as he took a turn way going way too fast. He was getting pissed, which was not good.

"How about not making me rebuild your birthday present less than a week after I gave it to you. Thinking I'm not the one that has issues with this."

"I just hate him. He's got to be in on this somehow, he knows Purgatory, he knows how it works and if we happened to get taken out by monsters not him, it wouldn't break our deal."

"Well I'm not a fan of him either. If that is the case, being pissed off won't help."

A light turned red and he ended up having to stop fast. Good thing I'd installed new seat belts. He whipped his head around to look at me, I could feel him fighting the wolf. "How can you be so damn calm?"

"Light goes green, pull over." I ordered. I wasn't letting him drive until he calmed down.

His knuckles went white on the steering wheel but he did what I said and pulled into an empty parking lot.

"Look," I said, "I appreciate the fact that you pushed him into a corner to protect me and everyone else and I know we lost some hunters because of this shit. I know you hate what he did to me, but Crowley will never change who he is. Getting pissed off that he tried to kill us really doesn't help the situation. Especially now. Maybe it's because I've been out of the life for awhile now, I don't know, but this really isn't something that should surprise us, or really piss us off. You told Crowley hands off, threatened him, made him feel powerless. You really think he'd just let that go? The guy can't stand being wrong, not being in control, or finding out someone got the drop on him. We don't know he's part of this, the wolves said they'd been out for over a year, but if he is, doubling down on insulting him won't work. As soon as he pops up and sees you he's going to get extra aggressive, so just calm down, think and look for an opening to use against him. All right?"

He took a few deep breaths, grumbled a few cuss words and gave in. "Yeah, okay. I'll keep it under control."

"Good. Let's get it over with."

We got what we needed and got back just in time to say bye to the rest of them. Oliver and Roy weren't really in talkative moods. Coyote and I had said all that we needed too, so we hugged each other and I walked her out to the car. "Be careful, follow Roy and Coyote's lead. Call if you need anything."

"We will." Coyote said, "Try not to get sucked into another realm or start the end of the world while we're gone," she had a huge smirk on her face, "you two have been doing so well staying out of trouble this last year."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence." I gave her a quick kiss and let her get in the car. "Keep in touch."

Oliver nodded as he got in the driver's seat. I watched the car disappear down the road and headed back down into the Bunker. Time to cook for Death. My life, I swear.


	44. A Meal With Death

Sam stopped short of picking on me too much while I'd been grabbing what I needed for what I was making for Death. I made sure to pick the high end shit, the extra expensive ground bison, extra sharp cheddar cheese, red potatoes and pickles that I had no idea why they were that pricey. I also picked up some of that salad mix that had every type of green thing in it out there. Coyote and I had perfected a bison burger recipe over the last year and I threw a bit of the $200 bourbon I'd bought into the sauce too. Sam almost cried when I did that. I blamed the onions for me tearing up, Sam knew better. Hey if you're cooking for Death, you go all the way.

"Go set up a table and all that in the dungeon," I told Sam while I was prepping. "Set up a table for Crowley too, just with one of those classy glasses for the bourbon. I may as well give him a shot of it, he'll get all pissy if he finds out I cooked a meal for Death and didn't get him anything."

"We're giving Crowley a shot of bourbon? Are you sure we should summon both of them at the same time?

"We're not, but in case Death doesn't have any info and we need to call Crowley may as well plan ahead. Just go with it. I'll explain when you get back."

He just rolled his eyes and wandered off. Cas had been watching us prep but he'd been staying pretty quiet. At least until Sam left, "This isn't how you usually treat Crowley."

"Yeah, I know. I have a theory. Had a lot of time to think things over. I'll go into it more when Sam gets back."

"I'm intrigued."

Sam came back a few minutes later and sat at the kitchen table while I worked. "Here's the thing," I started out, "As much as it makes my skin crawl to do I spent a decent amount of time over the last year trying to figure out why Crowley wanted to make me a Knight of Hell. He went way out of his way to do everything he could to keep me happy and sane after I went demon, not to mention the whole twisted road trip we did to get the First Blade. What I came up with is this, and it sounds stupid but here it is. In the entirety of Hell, or for all I know, his entire life, Crowley's never found someone that challenged him, kept him on his toes, like we do. He can't let anyone that clever get too high up in the ranks in Hell or they could take him out. It's obvious he sees demons, all of them, as expendable and useless. Who knows if he ever had a decent friendship with anyone over the years. Then we come along, we don't cower, don't back down and I show him a sort of grudging respect, or at least that's how he sees it, because we need him. He sees us as equals, especially me for some reason, I mean he wanted me to help him fix Hell, be a sort of right hand man to him. So I think we should use that when we talk to him. He craves attention, needs someone to talk to, needs a twisted sort of validation so we give him what he wants and see where it gets us."

"Interesting theory," Cas said.

Sam, on the other hand, wasn't too thrilled.

"Are you fucking kidding? You want to kiss ass and play nice?"

"No, what I want is to solve this without ending up having to go to Purgatory to do it ourselves or be worried about demons on our ass again. It'd be nice if once, just once, we get a solution for something without ending up hip deep in shit again. This isn't my life anymore Sam, I don't want it to be. I won't back down, you know that, but I don't think it could hurt to try a different approach. After all that's what you and Coyote have been hammering me with since we got rid of the Mark, doing things differently. Aside from being werewolves now doing things differently this time around seems to be working pretty well for us, and it's really been working well for you and Roy. I mean we wiped out a whole slew of monsters with minimal clusterfuckage, you and Roy went a year without anything major blowing up in your faces, I say let's keep going with it."

I could tell he wanted to argue with me, but there wasn't much he could say. We all knew how much better hunters had been doing lately, "I'm not going to sit there and play waiter for the bastard."

"No one said you had to. I'll handle it." I'd seen Coyote grit her teeth and be nice to people she hated a lot over the past year to get things accomplished. Hopefully I'd learned a thing or two from her.

We got everything set up, Sam and I had some burgers, then I made a plate for Death and Sam summoned him.

He appeared a few feet from the table we'd set up in the dungeon, took one long look at us and one of his thin eyebrows shot up on his bony face, "I see. That explains it then." He sniffed and looked towards the table, "Is that bison? I've been meaning to try that."

"Yeah, it is. Cooked it myself, there's some $200 bourbon in the sauce too." That first instant I see him still makes me jumpy, Sam too judging by that second of instant fear he'd felt when Death appeared. I think everything just knows on a instinctive level who and what Death is, even our wolf side went super quiet. It felt like it was trying to hide somehow.

"Really?" He said as he sat down at the table, "Well, that is quite the sacrifice for you Dean, thank you."

Sam, Cas and I kept our mouths shut until he had a bite or two of the burger, wiped his mouth with a napkin then looked back up at us. "I don't know how to turn you back to human if that is why you summoned me."

"It's not but thanks for the heads up," I said. "What were you referring to when you said that explains it?"

He took another bite, "Mmm, this is rather delicious. You and Sam jumped to the head of my list for a brief moment, then fell off it. I assumed Castiel had saved you again at first but your names simply vanished, which made no sense. Now that I see you're no longer human that clears up the mystery."

"Can you explain that a bit more?" Sam asked. I was pretty damn confused too.

"Yes, non-human beings don't require Reapers when they die, they go straight to Purgatory. There is no other option. As a result it's not in my purview to assign a Reaper to oversee your death personally now." He fixed us with a somewhat cold stare, "I may make an exception though since you insist on mucking up my schedule."

"Well, we're working on mucking fewer things up," I said. "Which brings us to why we summoned you. Here's the situation." I laid everything out for him, refilled his drink once and got him some extra pickle chips after he'd finished his first helping. "So, any ideas?"

For a second there I wanted to join the wolf side and go hide somewhere too. No one does a death glare like Death. Sam and I both had to stop ourselves from taking a step back, Cas even twitched a bit.

"You are sure that Reapers are involved with this." He enunciated each word in that slow empty way of his that freezes you in place.

"That's what we were told, "Sam said.

"Well, let us find out for sure shall we?" He closed his eyes and I'm not sure how or why I knew but I'm pretty sure time stopped. The temperature of the air in the room dropped and it felt like we were getting stretched out. Not physically but inside, the wolf side started panicking.

-Death! Run!-

Sam and I whimpered, not by choice and found ourselves fighting to stay on two legs.

Cas put a hand on each of our shoulders. "I'm here."

That divine calming presence hit me and the wolf got confused.

-Not pack. How?-

-Dig around my brain.- I told it, -It's all there. Stay calm, Death isn't after us. -

-But it's right there! Can't you feel it?-

Couldn't fault it's logic. -Trust me. It's fine.-

That would probably have worked if three Reapers hadn't picked that second to pop in less than five feet away from Sam and I. The wolves overpowered us since they were spooked already. I lunged backwards as I tried to hold on and help Sam but I couldn't. Coyote's energy hit us too late, we'd already started shifting.

"Cas!" As soon as I said it the world went black.

"Dean, Sam wake up." Cas' voice.

"That was unexpected," Death added.

I opened my eyes, Sam and I were on the ground but still human. "What happened?"

"I did as you asked. Your wolves reacted to the presence of the Reapers and started to assert control. I made you sleep. It's only been a few minutes."

 _"Babe! Are you okay?"_ Coyote's voice slammed into my brain.

 _"Yeah, we're fine. Wolves freaked out. Cas handled it. Will explain later. Everyone good there?"_

 _"Barely. That hit fast."_

 _"There was a reason. Don't worry we got a handle on it."_

It was getting harder to hear her. Distance must be kicking in. I texted her that I'd call later and looked up at Death.

"You are remarkably calm about your new status Dean, even for you," Death said.

"Yeah I keep hearing that. I took a vacation, maybe that helped. Sam? You good?" He nodded and sat up. I focused back on Death and the Reapers. The Reapers were scared, actually beyond scared. They were standing in a corner, grouped together, eyes wide and reeking of fear, I could smell it. Their bodies were tense, like they were straining against some sort of force. "All right, so these guys know anything?"

"Indeed,"" Death replied, "I must apologize first, I wasn't aware that my searching for the rogues would upset you."

Sam spoke up first, "Neither did we. Don't worry about it."

Wasn't all that often that Death apologized.

"These three are the ones who were helping the non-humans back across the veil," Death was pissed, his right hand twitched as he spoke. I kind of got the impression he was keeping himself from obliterating the Reapers until we got what we needed. "I decided to wait until you were conscious again before allowing them to speak further." He lifted a finger and their bodies relaxed. He pointed at the blonde chick, there were two guys and one girl. "Clarissa, speak," He commanded.

She winced and started talking, it seemed like she didn't have much of a choice, "I was going through Purgatory to get to Hell, it's a short cut. Gordon stopped me, told me he had a deal for me. He'd seen Dean escape and all that followed and wanted out, wanted to get revenge on the Winchesters. I said yes. I was sick of seeing them destroying the natural order and causing chaos." She glared at us, we growled back and Cas immediately put his hand on our shoulders again, "He didn't even have to pay me. We worked out the details and I got him a human to get him out of the portal. The portal opens when humans end up in Purgatory, as long as there are humans there it won't close. It was slow going at first, at least until the demon came and helped."

Sam went from growling to cussing, "Told you!"

"Was it Crowley? Was the demon acting on orders?" I asked. I had to clarify, not to protect Crowley but to make sure I had a handle on the whole story.

Clarissa shrugged, "Don't know, don't care. It'd work deals with humans, promise them superpowers if they did this one little thing. They'd willingly go to Purgatory and try to carry out a monster. If they got killed early, extra soul for Hell. If not, Mairyn or the vamps tried to change them to keep up the deal. Some lived, some died."

There was a crack of something close to thunder when the bottom of Death's cane hit the concrete floor, "What?" His quiet voice hit us deep down, goosebumps rose on my skin. I was damn glad he wasn't pissed at us. "You worked with a demon to let non-humans escape Purgatory?"

"So? You helped Dean stop the Apocalypse.." She snapped back then realized just what she'd done and who she was talking to. Death narrowed his eyes and made a small gesture with his right hand. She screamed and exploded into a cloud of black smoke. The other two dropped to their knees.

"What did you two gentleman know?" Death asked. "Was there some rational explanation given as to why this would be allowable?"

"No sir." The brown haired one replied.

"Then why?"

"By the time she asked us the hunters had started becoming more effective, the balance was shifting. Monsters and Hell were getting more desperate, we thought this would minimize casualties if the monsters got reinforcements."

"It is not your job to get involved in such things," Death stated. "You have one job, that is to collect souls. The cosmic balance is not your concern."

They kept their eyes on the ground and spoke in unison, "Yes sir."

"Return to your rounds. I will be watching you, stray again and I will not be so lenient." Between one second and the next they were gone. Death looked back at us. "I will search out any others that may be thinking about independent action and strongly advise against it."

"Thanks," I said, "Any chance you can find out if there are humans still in Purgatory?"

"I can see if there are but I cannot get them out."

"Yeah we know." The whole Death can't touch people thing, sort of a problem in this case.

He took a longer look at us, considering something or other, "It would be best if I did that elsewhere and then informed you of what I find. Your other side would probably react strongly. I never expected Fenris to take a stand in anything again, or make more children."

Nice thing about Death, he knows everyone. "What do you mean?" Sam asked.

"The whole story will take far too long to explain," he said in between the last few bites of his meal, "I will say that he must have been gravely concerned to have stretched himself this far. I assume Oliver Queen, Roy Harper and Running Coyote are all part of this as well. Their names did the same thing as yours did."

Now that was just disturbing, "Yeah."

"Impressive and concerning. Fenris, unlike others, is honorable. If he chose to protect or help you he saw a pressing need, he won't betray you. I will return shortly. Thank you for the meal Dean." He set his napkin down and disappeared.

Sam, Cas and I stared at the empty table.

"Dean, we may have to go back," Sam stated.

"Not in the mood Sam, really not."

"As I stated earlier," Cas said, "I will go."

"By yourself? No. No way in hell. Sam and I would be a shit ton safer than you. We'd go furry and probably slip right by everything there."

"That works up until you're having to lead humans out." Cas countered.

I didn't want to think about it, "Let's see what Death says first, all right?"

They didn't say anything. They didn't have to really, I had no illusions that Death would come back and say there weren't people there. My luck never works that way.


	45. Death's Return

"There is something else to consider," Cas stated, "You are no longer human. You may not be able to go through that portal. Which means you'd need..."

"A Reaper to help out," Sam interrupted, "Or a demon, or you."

"See, this is why I didn't want to talk about it," I grumbled. "The more we talk about it, the worse it gets. Cas will attract Leviathans again, not sure any other angel would want to pitch in, which leaves us with trusting a Reaper or a demon."

Sam had thought of something, "Maybe not. Cas knows the spell to open a door to Purgatory."

"Which worked oh so well last time. It's not like we'll know where that door will be in Purgatory and who knows what will get out this time."

"It actually worked as intended Dean."

I scowled at him and chose not to reply to that statement.

"But what if it works from inside Purgatory?" Sam continued.

He'd lost me. "What?"

"He teaches us the spell, we use it to bail and get out on our own."

"Cas? Would that work?" It was clever if nothing else.

Cas thought about it for a few minutes, "It's possible, but there is no guarantee you would end up at a specific place here. You could end up in another country, or in the middle of an ocean. It wasn't designed to be a door to go through, it was a portal to let things out."

"Well, maybe we can refine it." Sam suggested.

"Perhaps."

Cas didn't seem all that confident about that idea though, I was about to say something when Death reappeared, he looked somber, even for him.

He ran his eyes across us and leaned on his cane before he spoke, "There are four young humans in Purgatory."

A mix of fear and boiling rage ran through me, I kept a lid on it though, barely. "How young?"

"Teenagers. They are being protected by creatures similar to yourselves."

"Goddamnit!" Sam ground out between clenched teeth. "Dean? We..."

"Shut up, I know. We have to find a way in!"

Death held his hand up, "They are deep within Purgatory, it would take you quite some time to get there and you may not be able to return. Purgatory is designed to trap non humans permanently. It isn't, however, designed to hold angels or me."

Cas studied Death for a second and nodded, "I see."

"We don't," Sam said.

"Are you taking sides?" I asked.

"Hardly. However, those humans are there because of my Reapers. Therefore, it falls upon me to correct their errors. I cannot bring the humans back myself, humans don't travel well with me as you can imagine. Castiel however would be able to protect them from me as we traveled. If he still had his wings he could do this on his own, but since he does not, this is the next best solution." He gave Sam and I a piercing look, "I am not doing this for you, that must be very clear. I am doing this to rectify an error."

" _Is this his way of saying he likes us but can't actually admit that?"_ Sam's voice echoed inside my head.

" _I'm going with yes and taking it. Anything to keep you and I from going back to Purgatory that's not a deal with a demon sounds good to me."_

"We totally understand," I said. "And, even though it has nothing to do with helping us, thank you."

Death relaxed, "Your appreciation is not required." Is what he said, the little upward twist to his lips said otherwise. "Castiel, are you ready?"

"Of course."

We needed to talk to those kids, "Wait, before you go. Any chance you could bring them back here? We'd like to talk to them."

"I think that can be arranged," Death replied then held his cane out towards Cas. Cas wrapped his hand around the end of it and they both vanished.

"Never, ever saw that coming," I said. "I mean, yeah he helped out with the Apocalypse but this?"

"He does have a set sense of how things are supposed to run though," Sam reminded me, "He was pretty pissed about what the Reapers did."

"Yeah but still." It was weird having a supernatural being other than Cas helping us without seeming to expect anything in return. I was still waiting for the other shoe to drop with Fenris. Death may have said he was an honorable guy but I didn't know Fenris so I wasn't quite willing to take the optimistic view.

"We summoning Crowley?" Sam asked.

"Not yet. If the portal shuts when the humans are out of Purgatory and Death gets the Reapers in line we may be able to avoid all of that. "The important thing is shutting this plan down. That's it."

"Right, but.."

"Crowley schemes," I interrupeted, "It's what he does. Unless you want to kill him and take the chance that who ever takes over isn't going to just come straight for us, I'm not seeing a whole lot of options here. If he's in on it, he'll know Death stepped up to shut him down. That should make him back off." I did not want to get back on Crowley's radar and I didn't want Sam to piss him off even more.

"Agreed, but those kids may have signed their souls away already. We just going to let a hellhound take them in ten years? He can void those contracts."

"Oh. Damn." He didn't say anything. "Let's see what the kids say." That was my weak ass way at avoiding the problem. I knew they would have already made their deal. No demon would work it any other way.

"Sure."

We stared at each other for a few minutes then Cas and Death reappeared with two teenagers. A short, nerdy looking guy with dirty blonde hair and a Hispanic girl that I would have thought wouldn't need a demon's help. She was going to grow into an attractive woman and seemed confident as all hell. The guy was scared shitless, the girl may as well have been at a mall with as much emotion as she was showing.

Cas' eyes were glowing, "Here's these two, we'll get the other ones and return." They left again before I could say anything.

"Where are we?" The girl asked.

"You're in Kansas," Sam said.

She blinked a few times and gave us the default teenager not believing the adults look, "Really? You're not, like, making a joke right?"

So much for thinking kids these days don't know the classics. "No, as insane as it sounds. You'e in Kansas," I clarified, "I'm Dean, this is my brother Sam. We're going to help you out."

"I didn't ask for your help, don't need it," she snapped, "Now send me back. I've got a job to do, I gave my word."

"Hold on, wait, you want to go back to Purgatory?" I asked.

"Yeah old man, I do."

I took a better look at her, her hair was short, she was in beat up jeans, an old grey short sleeved t-shirt and heavy black boots. I saw scars on her arms, a few of them looked like bullet holes and the bottoms of some tattoos peeking out of her sleeves. Her eyes were hard, way too old for her age and filled with that street kid, hard life toughness most of which was faked to hide her fear.

The guy on the other hand looked like a suburban kid, a little overweight and probably got picked on a lot. He was in slacks, a dress shirt and the only thing on his face was regret and a desperate hope. "You can save me? All I wanted was straight A's so I could get into college and superstrength! Jesus!"

Yup, called it.

Sam looked at me, shifted his eyes to the girl then back to me. I'd do better talking to her than he would.

"Okay, the job you have to do, it's been shut down," I started to explain, "The tall skinny guy in all black? That's Death. The things that took you into Purgatory were his Reapers, doing things they weren't supposed to. The guy in the trenchcoat, angel named Castiel. Between the two of them, the demon that came to you scheme isn't in play anymore. Now we need to get your souls back. That's if you signed them away. Did you?"

The poor guy looked like he was about to faint, Sam propped him up and helped him to the chair, the girl just stood there. "I didn't sign a damn thing."

"Did you kiss someone?"

She didn't say anything the flinch gave it away, "Right, okay. How long?"

"How long what?"

"Don't play dumb, you're not. How many years did you get? Or maybe the demon just said they'd come see you in a few years."

Her eyes shifted away from mine, yup. I fricking hate it when the demons use that line.

"How do I know you're not just screwing with me? This could be some jacked up other world like that one was."

"Follow us. Both of you." Figured I may as well get both of them convinced.

We walked out through the halls and got to the main room.

"Whoa! Is this like a secret hide out?" The guy asked, his eyes wide, "Are you guys like some secret society?"

"Kind of," Sam answered.

"Huh, a library, must be a sucky secret society," The girl added.

Girl after my own heart. I shot Sam a quick look, he just rolled his eyes and kept walking. Once we got outside I pulled out my phone, unlocked it, went on the net and showed them the screen.

"See? Real world. Look, I know it's hard to believe, we've both been to Purgatory but this is home, the real world."

The girl's tough act cracked for a second when I'd said we'd had our own trips to Purgatory. "You've been there?"

"Yeah, wasn't being protected either. Got stuck there for a year, Sam did a quick tour too. It sucks, we know, but you're safe now. We just have to get your souls back from the demon. We need your help to do that."

She looked at my phone again, the rest of the tough girl act faded, "Is that date right?"

"Yeah, why?"

She grabbed the phone out of my hand and started typing.

"Hey!" I went to get it back but Sam stopped me.

"When were you taken?" Sam asked.

She bit her lower lip and started looking like a teenage girl, not some bad ass chick, "Two months ago, but..."

"Time works differently there and here," Sam explained. "What's wrong?"

She stopped on an obituary post and almost dropped my phone.

"No! That bastard! He promised! Said I'd be able to stop it! Fix her!"

Oh hell. The obit said someone named Gloria Hernandez had died of cancer leaving her daughters Cecilia and Vicki behind.

"Let's back up," I said, "What's your name?"

"Cecilia, that's Greg." She answered while fighting back tears.

"Gloria was your Mom?" I asked.

"What do you think genius?"

Sympathy wouldn't work on her, not yet, "Okay, this bastard, what did he or she look like?"

"Snarky, old, British dude. Weird name." I could probably give her Ruby's knife and let her kill Crowley for us, she'd gone straight to homicidal.

Sam kept the anger off his face but I felt it. "Crowley?"

"Yeah."

Greg shook his head, "Mine was a hot, brown haired woman. Tall..." his eyes went out of focus as he described her, probably the first time he'd ever kissed a chick, "So pretty."

"Pretty and possessed by a demon. You get a name?"

"Rebecca."

Cas' name popped up on my phone along with a text, "Where are you? We have the other two and have returned."

"Cas is back." I told them, "Let's get back inside and figure this out."

" _Teenagers!"_ Sam's voice flooded my brain, " _This is low, even for him."_

 _"Not really, trust me."_

 _"He won't want to give up those contracts."_

 _"Yeah, I know. Not without getting something for them."_

 _"No deals! Never again Dean, never."_ Each word was like a punch inside my head. He wasn't mad at me, just that set on not making a deal.

" _Ow! Easy man, I'm not up for that either."_

We'd made it back to the room where the dungeon was. We spotted Cas standing there with two other girls, one of them was staring up at Cas, there was a bloodstain on her arm. They must have gone to the same private school since they were wearing the same uniform. The other one had her head buried into Cas's chest and was sobbing. Death was standing off to one side.

"What happened?" I asked.

"Small skirmish, she's fine."

"How did you do that?" She asked.

"I'm an angel," Cas replied then looked at us, "This is Kelly and Tiffany. They traded their souls for the chance to shift into a wolf."

Kelly was the one who'd been bleeding and Tiffany was the other one.

Oh great, "Why?"

"They apparently thought it would be, and I quote, "Amazeballs", whatever that means."

"Is it over? Is it?" Tiffany almost screamed in between her sobs.

Sam spoke up, "You're not in Purgatory anymore but it's not over yet. Let's get everyone into some chairs and get you some food and water okay?"

Cas nodded and started guiding the two girls out of the dungeon.

Sam looked at me _, "You see if Death knows anything else, I'll take care of them."_

 _"Got it."_

He followed Cas and the kids out, leaving me with Death.

He'd calmed back down, or that's what it seemed like anyway, "Are you going to attempt to convince Crowley to void their contracts?"

"Yeah, any tips?"

"Just this. Do not assume that because no demon has attacked you while you were on vacation that he is not unaware of what you have been doing. Tread carefully Dean." He paused and lost that small bit of humanity that he'd shown, "I have met my obligations regarding this situation. Try not to muck anything else up." Then he vanished.

Death's never needed a lot of time to deliver a crap ton of bad news. Looks like I'd get to catch up with Crowley after all. Just what I wanted to do.


	46. Retribution?

I left the dungeon and was walking towards the table where the kids were sitting. Sam had whipped up some basic sandwiches for them and tossed cheese, crackers and some protein bar things on a few plates in case the sandwiches weren't enouugh. They were working their way through them pretty fast. I have no idea what they ate in Purgatory, when I was there I was never hungry, which may have meant I'd actually died again. Course I was starving when I'd gotten out. More things I didn't need to dwell on.

Sam motioned me away from the table to the kitchen so I kept walking and met him there.

"They're from all over the country," he said, "Not surprising but we have to get them home soon. They've all been gone for a few months. Death say anything useful about Crowley?"

"Other than telling me that Crowley more than likely already knows what I've been doing for the past year, not really. He said tread lightly. It's not like demons can't follow Baby or he doesn't have some spell he can use to watch her. I guess I should have thought of that." He looked guilty, which was stupid, "Sam, you did what you could. It's fine. The deal you made has probably kept them from actually doing anything other than watching. We just need to take that into account when talking to him." I hadn't gotten pissed about it when Death said it, mainly because it didn't surprise me all that much, but now that it had sunk in a little farther I could feel that wolf need to protect starting to build and make my own usual protectiveness sky rocket. The people on the Reservation were my people, Coyote's people. They get hurt, it's all on me. I couldn't let that happen, wouldn't...

Sam put his hand on my arm, "Dean, not here, not now. Kids? Remember? Look at your hands."

I looked down, the bones were already starting to move and change. Sam was managing to keep calm and was pushing that at me through the pack bond.

"You got Devil's trap bullets?" I asked.

"Yeah, for the nines. Why?"

"Fall back plan if he doesn't want to play nice. You pump the kids for information, I'm going to the armory."

He let his hand drop from my arm and nodded, "Sure. They're in the second drawer underneath the bow stands. Take Cas with you."

"I'm good."

He locked eyes with me and I felt it, the need to back down, and not because I wanted to. With Coyote out of reach he technically outranked me and I had to look away, "Take Cas. Please." There was a lot more force to his words than usual.

"Ordering me now?"

"No, asking with intent. This is the shit that always sent you over the edge before, the wolf side will make it a million times harder to stay rational. So please, take Cas."

"Fine." I couldn't argue, even without the whole pack thing, because he was right. I closed my eyes and noticed that more than my hands had started to shift, my body felt out of whack. I made myself think of something other than the Reservation getting attacked, it wasn't easy but I calmed down enough that the weird out of synch feeling faded. When I opened my eyes I checked my hands again, they were back to normal.

"You good?" Sam asked.

"For now." I walked away and gave Cas a signal for him to walk with me.

He caught up with me as we entered the hall to the armory, "You're upset. What did Death say?"

"That Crowley probably knows where I've been the last year so play nice."

"And playing nice requires a trip to the armory?"

"I don't expect Crowley to play nice back. Not after how you and Sam got him to back off. He's not going to be all that happy that we threw a wrench in his plan, especially bringing Death into things. So, backup plan."

"Which would be?"

I pulled open the door to the armory and stepped in, "Remind him of how this game is played. He wants to bring kids into shit like this, he pays for it."

I grabbed Ruby's knife and loaded a clip with Devil's Trap bullets. Taking adults into Purgatory is one thing. Kids? Hell no. Cas watched me without a word as I slammed the clip into a gun and tucked it into my waistband then slid the knife into my back pocket. What I really felt like doing was ripping Crowley to shreds using my fangs but I tried not to give into that, at least not yet.

"What if he grabbed children for a reason that had nothing to do with defeating hunters? If what Death said is accurate and Crowley knows where you have been this would be a way to get you into the field again. He knows you Dean."

That stopped me cold. A growl echoed through the room that I didn't realize was coming from me until Cas moved closer and his hand started reaching for my forehead. "Perhaps I should have kept that thought to myself."

"Don't, I need to learn how to control this." Cas stopped but he was still within arm's length.

The wolf was separate but not. I felt it's need to take out Crowley, well, any threat, fighting to break free. It scratched at the sides of my mind, but my Warrior Spirit still had to be in there somewhere too and he was much more rational. I had to be more rational, everyone knew I had a temper and once Crowley figured out what we were now he'd poke and prod at us to try to get us to snap. Anything to get us off balance. I put all thoughts of what was going on out of my head and pictured Coyote's house, our house, how it felt, the calmness that filled it, the happiness, the love. The wolf started to fade and something deep down inside my soul pulled at me. Coyote. Us. That was my anchor. I'd never had one before, not like this. Sam didn't ground me like she did.

It reverberated through the pack bond and Sam picked up on it, " _What's this?"_

 _"My happy spot. No, not a strip club."_

 _"I sort of gathered that. Home?"_

 _"Yeah, home. Feel free to use it when Crowley shows up. We'll need it."_

What came back to me shook me to the very core, and there was no way he could hide it. Loneliness, a bittersweet sense of longing, old pain, new desires that would never happen and the feeling that no matter what he touched it would fall apart. It's not like I didn't know that was there in both of us but feeling it full force from him was a whole lot different, " _Hey, it's your home too."_

 _"No, not like it is for you. Sorry, couldn't block that out."_

 _"Nothing to be sorry about. Let's get this over with."_

Cas narrowed his eyes and inspected me, "Better?"

"Yeah, let's go summon the King of Hell. Put the kids in the room across the hall from the dungeon, keep the door to it open. You stay with them, if Sam or I need you we'll yell. Once we get him to agree to giving them their souls back we'll come get you."

"All right."

We got back to Sam and the kids, "Okay, here's the plan. We're going to get you your souls back, Cas here will keep an eye on you till then. Once that's done we'll get you all home."

"What are we going to tell people?" Cecilia asked.

"Have no idea but my suggestion, don't mention demons, Purgatory or monsters unless you want to end up in the psych ward. Sam?"

Cas rounded the kids up and followed us to the dungeon, he got them in the room across the hall and Sam and I slid the bookshelves opened, stepped through and closed them.

"Cas had an unnerving theory," I said as we got the herbs and everything ready to go, "Crowley went for kids to get to me."

"That's why you needed the happy place tactic."

"Yup."

He was pulling on his analytical side to keep calm, "It's possible. The deal was Crowley and demons couldn't hurt you, monsters weren't mentioned."

"Why?"

"Not saying this to be a jackass but he misses you?"

I added some blood to the herb mix, the cut healed itself almost instantly, convenient, "Wait, I thought weapons couldn't hurt us." I'd sliced my hand out of habit.

"Maybe if we're not furry they still do damage but won't kill us."

I sighed, "Let's test that." I pulled my clothes off and shifted. Sam took the knife and sliced it across the top of my front leg. I felt the blade but it didn't cut into the skin. _"You got regular bullets in your gun?"_

"Yeah, I'l go grab a silencer so the kids don't freak. Hang on."

He was back a few minutes later, "Where do you want it?"

I held up my front left paw and waited. He pulled the trigger, it hurt like a son of a bitch but blood didn't start gushing. I turned my paw around to look at the bullet. It was embedded into the skin but as I watched it got pushed back out and dropped to the ground. _"Awesome! Shoot your foot."_

"What? No. Hold on." He put the barrel alongside his shin at angle so it would graze his leg but not go all the way in and fired. "Motherfucker!" He snarled as the bullet kicked up some concrete when it hit the ground. His leg bled, then stopped and the skin started puckering around the wound and healing. "Interesting, so in human form we're still vulnerable-ish. Wolf form, basically impervious. Wonder why the difference."

 _"When we're wolves the gift is in full effect would be my guess. Still though, will come in handy."_

 _"_ Yeah."

I shifted back, got dressed and looked at Sam, he nodded and started chanting. He through the last ingredient in the bowl, the mixture flared up and Crowley appeared in front of us.

"Back from the hinterlands are you Dean?" He asked while pointedly ignoring Sam. He noticed the table with the bourbon on it, "Is that for me?"

"Yeah," I answered.

"How civilized." He took a sip, nodded in appreciation and held the glass up to look at the color of it, "Nice to see one of you still has manners. Funny that it's you, what with Sam being the Ivy League one. Maybe your mother instilled it in you before she died. Sam would have missed out on all that I guess."

Yeah he was pissed, he was going right for the jugular straight out of the gate. Well, two could play this game, "We thought you might need it since you've obviously lost your touch. Teenagers Crowley? Is that what the King of the Hell is doing now? Funny, I thought that was loser demon turf, not yours."

"Maybe we've just scared the loser demons off," Sam chimed in, "So he's reduced to running two bit deals and hoping no one notices. Can't let those numbers drop, the rest of Hell might start talking."

He slowly set the glass down and the corners of his eyes tightened. Point for us. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Uh-huh, sure. That's why you're pissed."

"Last time I was here Moose and your damaged pet angel wanted to play rough. I didn't particularly enjoy the experience."

"Sucks when you're the one getting it up the ass doesn't it?"

"You, of course, being the expert in getting things shoved up and into places they don't belong. Funny you didn't get a taste for it after thirty years."

 _"_ You bastard!" Sam took the bait and lunged forward.

I barely got in front of him, _"_ Don't do it." I could feel Crowley's smirk behind me. "Crowley, take a good, long look at us. You may want to rethink things." I kept my hand on Sam's chest but looked over my shoulder at Crowley who wasn't doing that great a job of hiding his reaction to however he perceived us now.

"What are...no..can't be. That wasn't the..." He shut his mouth and managed to regain his composure.

I gave Sam a slight push back and he forced himself to take a set back. I turned back to Crowley, "The what? The deal with Mariyn? Yeah, she got her own ideas once she was out. Thought we'd make a fun addition to her pack. They're all dead now by the way. Burned their bodies too, they won't be coming back. We passed that tip onto the other hunters too. Your monster recycling program ends now. We want those kids' souls back."

"What kids?"

I knew he wouldn't give up that fast, "The ones Death took out of Purgatory. They're here, void their contracts."

"Death? You're lying. He wouldn't get involved."

"Ask him yourself if you want, or check in with whoever you had watching them," Sam said, "He said since his Reapers were the reason the kids were there it was his job to get them out."

"He wasn't too happy with those Reapers either," I added, "Disintegrated one actually. You know how Death's such a stickler for staying on task. That schedule of his and all that."

That got his attention and I could see him trying to find a way to weasel his way out of it.

"Look, here's the situation, all thirty five or forty monsters you helped get out are dead, Mairyn and her pack are dead, Death is watching the Reapers to make sure they don't get sucked into your schemes again and we've got all the humans that were in Purgatory. That means the portal should be closed. It's over Crowley, give the kids their souls back."

His face hardened, "No."

Damn it, he was getting all butthurt and stubborn.

"You lost," Sam pointed out, "What's the point?"

Crowley smirked, took another drink and pointed at us, "Did I? Seems to me that turning the Winchesters into monsters is a win for me. You won't be able to have that touching romantic ending Dean and Sam, well, just another failure to keep the ones you love from getting hurt to add to the list. So, who's killing who first? That's usually the next part of Winchester Tragedy Theater isn't it?"

Which told us two things, one, he knew exactly what I'd been doing and two, whether or not the idea originated from him, he used it as a way to circumvent his deal with Sam.

I yanked out my gun and shot him with three Devil's Trap bullets, "Sam. Shift."

Crowley dropped the glass and stared down at the blood spreading on his black shirt, "Bloody hell!"

Sam was shifting before he even got his shirt off. His frustration and hate of Crowley pouring into the bond and almost taking me with him. I heard fabric ripping next to me, guess he hadn't gotten his pants off fast enough. He wasn't whimpering or panting, he was full on growling as he changed.

"What is this? Monster Moose porn?" Crowley was trying to bluff his way through this, but that wouldn't be an option.

Even before his face finished forming into the wolf he'd thrown back his head and howled. I heard the kids scream, then suddenly stop. Cas must have knocked them out. "Dean!" Cas shouted from the other room.

"We're fine! Stay there!"

Sam was on all fours, furry and stalking towards Crowley who looked a shit ton less confident all of a sudden.

"Since you brought up my time in Hell, let's play a game. It works like this. If you don't give them their souls back, Sam goes all hellhound on your ass and rips you to shreds. You heal and we ask you again, repeat until we get what we want. Sound good?"

Sam leapt straight at him, knocking Crowley flat on his back. As soon as Sam's paws hit the floor he ripped a chunk out of Crowley's shoulder to prove a point. Crowley flat out screamed in pain.

I didn't let up. He'd crossed the last fucking line, using kids to bait me, pull me out of retirement. No way in hell he wasn't going to suffer for that, "You made a deal right? Must have to get where you are. Remember how it felt when they came for you? The howls, the fear, the pain. We can make that happen again and again. We'll live a helluva a lot longer now and have nothing but time on our hands."

Sam dove in for another bite, Crowley threw his hands up on instinct which gave Sam the perfect opening to nearly rip Crowley's left hand clear off. With the bullets in him he couldn't access his powers or smoke out which made him almost as vulnerable as a human to Sam's teeth.

"So? Reconsidering that no?"

Sam paused in the attack, stuck his fangs right into Crowley's face while setting his huge right paw on Crowley's chest and digging his claws in.

Crowley actually looked scared shitless. I don't care how many years it's been, you never get over being shredded by hellhounds. "Stop Sam, please. I'll do it."

"Do I have to have you sign something in blood on that or can I trust you?"

"I said I'll do it. Get your rabid brother off me, take out the bullets and I'll void their contracts. I don't need four incompetent teenagers anyway. They're useless now."

"All right."

Sam lingered, his wolf was way too near taking over. _"Sam? The kids, we need him to get their souls back. Let him up."_

 _-_ Hurt pack, hurt Dean, not safe- Came back to me. Not good.

" _Sam, don't lose it, I need you, they need you."_ A jumbled series of images, thoughts and feelings raced through my mind, the one that stood out was how he felt like he'd failed me, that he had to end Crowley to keep me safe. " _He's not the only one. Plenty of other demons out there hate me. Killing Crowley won't help. I had this last year because of you. Got my chance to be happy. This doesn't change that. Save the kids Sam, do our job, do it right."_ Slowly he felt more like Sam, less like a wolf and he took his paw off of Crowley's chest. " _Good, let me in there so I can take the bullets out."_ I wasn't about to get in between them until I knew Sam was in control. He took two steps back but kept his eyes laser focused on Crowley.

I wasn't going to leave them alone though, "Cas! Get the first aid kit, I need to take some bullets out of Crowley so he can fix the kids." I shouted then got between Sam and Crowley to make sure Sam stayed put.

Cas came in a minute or two later, handed me the kit and left without a word. Crowley had stared at Sam the whole time with some pretty serious hate in his eyes.

"Let's talk," I told him as I worked on digging out the first bullet. I didn't bother with any pain killers, he could suck it up. "Sam did what he did to protect me, you've obviously loop holed you're way around that deal so let's compromise."

"Why the hell should I trust you? You just had him use me as a chew toy."

"I'm the reason Hell didn't get shut down, I'm the reason he hasn't straight up killed you. That's why and you know it. That's why you wanted me back in the game because you think I'll keep a leash on him." He winced as I pulled the first bullet out. "So here's where we compromise. I got the sidelong threat to the people where I'm living at now. You or any demon come within fifty miles of that place or any of the people that live there, I don't stop him; as a matter of fact, it will be me standing over you ripping you to shreds with my claws. You give the kids their souls back and get to go back to Hell in one piece. This little meeting doesn't void Sam's deal with you since you were behind this whole mess to begin with, so his attacking you cancels out you round about sucking me back into hunting thereby putting me at risk. You live, we live, kids go home, life goes on. Deal?"

"Deal." He muttered.

I pulled out the other two bullets, he healed up, we cuffed him which we'd discovered allowed him to walk over the Devil's trap, they worked as some sort of lock and key set up, took the cuffs off, brought the kids in and he voided their contracts. They were too freaked to ask where the white wolf had come from. Cas herded them back out and shut the door.

As soon as the door shut Crowley's hand flicked in Sam's direction. Sam flew back a few feet but he splayed his paws and stopped the backward momentum, then his ears went flat against his head and he bunched his legs up to jump.

"Before you do that Snowball, consider this. I only deal with humans that have souls to trade, that have possible worth to me, as your souls are no longer in play due to being bound straight for Purgatory any and all deals are null and void. Consider those four souls and the safety of your pitiful tribe a parting gift, for old times sake. Your safety however, the safety of those you hold most dear, that's a different story. Rules have changed gentlemen, good luck." He snapped his fingers and disappeared.


	47. Focus on the Future

I looked down at Sam, "He's freaked."

 _"Yeah, he gave us the souls and the tribe as "parting gifts"? Bullshit."_

"I wouldn't want to be in Hell when he gets back, the ass reamings will be epic."

Sam's lips curled, " _No, just clouds of black smoke as he walks down the hall disintegrating demons left, right and center."_

"Yeah, not feeling too torn up about that. You?"

 _"Not one bit."_

"You shifting back or staying like that?" I turned and saw his clothes, or what was left of them, "Need me to get you some new pants? Those are trashed."

He looked over his shoulder and his ears drooped down a little, " _Damn it, I liked those jeans too."_

"Maybe we should invest in a bunch of cheap sweats or workout pants. They come off easier."

 _"I am not walking around in sweats for the rest of my life. That's just stupid."_

The amount of heat he said that with was kind of surprising, _"_ When did you become a fashion critic? Oh wait, let me guess. Thea?"

He grumbled, " _Shut up. I'll go grab some new clothes and shift. Pour me some of the bourbon, I need to get the taste of Crowley out of my mouth."_

I made sure not to laugh out loud as he bundled the clothes into a pile with his paws, wrapped his jaws around them and carried them out towards the bookshelves, which were shut. The look on his face when he eyed me over his shoulder with a ball of clothes in his mouth was so worth it. _"Dude, you seriously going to make me ask? I can feel you laughing you know, jerk."_

I walked over and pulled the shelves apart, trying hard not to fall over and laugh in his face, "Has nothing to do with you, I swear."

His eyes narrowed, but he held his head up high as he walked through the gap I'd made, used his paw to open the door and turned down the hall to his room. That tore it for me, I barely made it into the chair before laughing so hard it hurt. Cas came in while tears were still streaming down my face.

"Is this an appropriate time for laughter? The children are still rather upset."

I wiped my face dry and tried to put the image of Sam's furry exasperation out of my head for now. "Sorry, it was something Sam said. You're right, not exactly the best moment to be cracking up. Sam and I will start getting flights for them and get them home. There's not a lot more we can do for them though. When they show back up there's going to be a ton of questions they won't have answers for, or at least answers anyone will believe." I had an idea, I didn't really like it but it may be easier than what they'd have to deal with as it stood now. "We could give them new memories."

Cas' face went still, he never liked doing that, "There's no we involved with that Dean."

"I know, but what options do we have here? If we send them back like this they won't be able to make it through all the questions without cracking. I know someone who helps kids that go through shit like this but those kids have no one else, they're hunter kids or kids who've lost their parents to monsters. These kids all do, they have homes, families, lives that they should get back to living. Just think about it. That's all I'm saying."

"What false memories would we implant?"

"Kidnapping, runaway, either would work. Come up with a generic looking face for a kidnapper to implant in their heads and go with that, or come up with a reason they would have runaway. We find out about their lives and make it fit. They're going to be traumatized no matter how we do this. It's been too long, we can't just wipe them clean."

He looked away and over my shoulder, staring at the dungeon with this odd super intent yet blank stare. "If I still had my wings..." he whispered.

In all the years since The Fall, he'd never really mentioned his wings specifically. It was something that happened, he adapted and learned how to drive, use phones all that. I couldn't really imagine what it would feel like to lose something like that, it's so far beyond anything I'd ever been subjected to. I just kept my mouth shut because nothing I would, or could say wouldn't sound completely worthless and dumb. He stood there, not moving, barely breathing, staring off into the distance, remembering things that he'd never be able to do again and knowing that he was the one who'd caused it.

"Yes, you're right," he finally said, "It would be much worse for them to remember this than to think they'd been abducted. I will take care of it. I will put them to sleep until we get them to the airport, implant the new memories, wake them up and send them on their way. You and Sam will be the FBI agents that found them. We will need to notify their families somehow so the stories make sense."

It was almost right, I had to add in a few touches though, "Change that to you being a hiker/deer hunter type that helped them escape. If they describe you to anyone, your face won't be in any police databases, Sam's and mine are. Let's do bus tickets too, they won't need ID. We can load them up in your car, they'll all fit. We'll get them some new clothes they can change into at the bus stop. Have them call their parents from there."

"Yes, that could work I guess." He barely nodded, "Cecilia's mother, there was a time I could have helped her so easily. I saw the deals when I made them sleep Dean. Such lies, such manipulation," More than a touch of old, righteous retribution Castiel was in his voice, "When did we angels lose our way?"

"I'd imagine it started when God chose to leave his angels instead of lead them. You've done the best..."

"No, I haven't." The gaze he turned on me at that point scared me, not because he was pissed or embodying that angelic power, but because it was the exact opposite. It was empty, exhausted and hopeless. I had to do something to help him and fast. "I will see to their memories," he continued, "They'll be ready when the time comes." Then he left without another word.

I was surrounded by silence, which hadn't really happened since this whole thing with Jacob had started. One thing I'd learned since moving in with Coyote was how to really step back and take stock of things, I never did that much living the hunter life. Never really wanted to, but Sam's comment about riding shotgun making you see things differently really hit me. Taking that approach to things, not taking charge, not bullying my way through a situation, it really lowered the stress level on me and kept me a lot more clear headed.

The five of us were pretty much unkillable now, Cas was more than depressed, Sam still had a gaping hole in his heart, and at some point Coyote and I would have to decide if we were going to try to live normal still. The people on the Reservation were bound to notice at some point or other that we weren't aging. Oliver and Roy would have some complicated choices as well.

The weirdest part of it all, which everyone seemed to keep noticing, was that the whole being a wolf thing wasn't bugging me in the least. My usual reaction to shit like this is to tear the world apart trying to fix it, but I didn't feel that driving need to. I actually felt more at peace and safer, nothing could take Coyote from me or hurt Sam, at least without doing something pretty insane. When or if I died, I wasn't going to end up in Hell either roasting over a fire or being subjected to an eternity of Crowley trying to make me his pet demon, wasn't sure which one of those would be worse. I wouldn't be going to Heaven with a bunch of pissed off angels that hated my guts either. All in all, it wasn't that bad of a break. I knew Oliver and Roy wouldn't see it the same way, and I'd still try to find a way out for them but if someone, right now, told me they could fix this, I wasn't too sure I'd take that offer, unless Sam and Coyote wanted out too.

I put all that out of my head and focused on the main issue to deal with after the kids were out of the picture. Cas and Sam needed help. I grabbed my phone and texted Coyote to call, they should be there by now but I didn't know what she was in the middle of. My phone rang a few seconds later. "Hi darlin'."

"Hey Babe. What's up?"

I caught her up on what we'd been up to. It took a second or two for her to process it all when I finished.

"You've been busy," she finally said.

"Yeah, but we managed to stay in this dimension and not trigger any further destruction, I guess we're getting better at this."

"Interesting that Death stepped up."

"Not gonna say anything to jinx it, just happy he did. So how are things on your end?"

"Oliver's taking to it pretty well, I'm letting Roy run point, it's been a few years since I've done this after all. I see a lot of Sam's style in Roy though. If you didn't know he was pretty new to this, you'd think he'd been born into hunting. He's that good."

For some reason that made me happy, maybe it was the fact that Sam was passing on the family business, even if Roy wasn't blood. Not that blood ever made that much difference to us. "Nice to hear. Any lead on the cursed object or what's got the spirit hooked there?"

"Yeah, turns out some old paintings and such were recently unearthed from a wall that they knocked out. We're working on getting the history on them. Shouldn't be too complicated after that."

"Nice. Other than our freakout that you felt, how's the wolf side?"

"Calm so far. The three of us talked a lot on the way here. I think Oliver's more and more willing to work with it rather than fight it. Roy's still trying to make sense of it intellectually but he's not rejecting it either."

I'd been more worried about Oliver, if he was going with it he'd be a lot better off, we all would. "Good." I shut the door to the room, went back into the dungeon and slid the bookshelves back together. I didn't want Sam or Cas to overhear. "About the cruise, I have a huge favor to ask. If you don't want to go for it, totally understand since it was supposed to be an us thing."

"Okay."

I'd never really asked for a lot of favors since we'd been together, didn't feel I had the right to with all the baggage I'd come with. Sam's birthday thing was the biggest one so far so she knew it had to be something important if I was asking. "Cas needs help, and I think Sam does too. Listen," I went into as much detail as I could about what I'd noticed with Cas and felt from Sam. Then launched into the favor, "I want to get both of them away from reality for awhile. Would you be okay with them coming? They can have rooms on the other side of the ship, that's fine. I just..."

"Yes. Of course."

I caught a twinge of something from the bond between her and I, it was faint though. "You're sure." I knew before she said it what the answer would be.

"Cas brought you back from Hell, saved you, kept you alive, and I would never tell you no when it comes to something like this with Sam. I've seen how this year off has helped you, if you think a week long cruise with us would help them, do it."

"I love you." Thank you didn't really cover it. This time the twinge was a lot more pronounced, guess we really didn't need to say how we felt anymore, we still would though. I loved saying it and hearing it.

"Love you too. We should be back in a day or two. This shouldn't take long. Call me after the kids are taken care of."

"Sure. Talk to you later."

We hung up and an image of something hit me, something for her. I knew just who to call to make it too. The hard part would be keeping her from picking up on it. Guess it was time to figure out just how this bond thing worked between us. I'd worry about that later. Right now I had some bourbon to pour for Sam and kids to get home, then I'd deal with the rest.


	48. Vacation Planning

I made my way back to the main room and got Sam's bourbon poured right before he walked in. His hair was wet, guess he needed to do a bit more than get the taste of Crowley out of his mouth. Cas had the kids asleep on the floor with pillows under their heads and blankets over them. He was working on Cecilia, his eyes were closed, his finger touching her forehead, fully intent on rearranging her brain.

I never liked watching that so I handed Sam the glass, had him follow me into the kitchen and filled him in on everything but the cruise. I wanted to tell him and Cas about that at the same time and it had to be the right time. Cas wasn't going to be in the mood to hear about it while the kids were still with us.

Sam downed his bourbon, nodded and set the glass down, "Yeah, not too keen on the memory wipe but I understand why. Good to hear that Roy's handling things well." There was a pretty serious look of pride on his face.

"Seems you taught him well," I said.

"Well, I learned from the best, glad to know I can pass it along."

"Yeah, we both did." There'd been plenty of times that I'd wished Bobby was still around so I could have him over to Coyote's place. He did say I should marry her, funny how things turn out. I just hope he'd managed to see some of it from whatever his Heaven was.

"So, next move?"

"Follow Cas to the bus stop, make sure the kids get off okay, wait for Coyote and the rest to get back."

He downed the drink and studied me, not just with his eyes either, there was this odd pulling sensation on the pack bond that made me dizzy for a second. "What the hell?" I asked.

"I don't know, I was just trying to get a read on you. Didn't mean to make anything happen." I could tell he was processing something, "You're not just calm because you're pushing the freakout off for later are you?"

"Meaning?" Yeah, I really wasn't liking how accurate that statement was.

"This.." he waved his hands in the air between us, "you like knowing that Coyote and I can't be killed all that easily now."

"Can't see how it's a bad thing."

"So, the fact that not only do we not live normal lives as humans, but now we're not even human doesn't bother you in the least?"

"Hey, if we find a way to fix this where we don't die, I'm all for it." As soon as I said it this feeling of utter wrongness hit me.

His eyes narrowed instantly, "You're lying."

Shit, well, this was going to get complicated. I didn't say anything, we just stared at each other for a minute. "All right fine, yes this turn of events has some pretty nice upsides. However, I don't expect everyone to agree with me. So, if we find a way to fix it, I won't necessarily be all in, but if everyone else wants out, then fine, we go back to human. Look, Death said Fenris is on the up and up, the other wolves didn't seem all fucked up once we got them away from Mairyn. The full moon is three days away, Coyote and the rest will be back by then, we can see how the moon affects us. If it doesn't make us go rabid I'm not really seeing much reason to panic."

He shook his head, "Dean, we could live forever, or at least a few hundred years. How are we going to keep that a secret? I mean, I'd have to quit hunting at some point. Hunters will sure as hell notice even if no one else does." He wasn't exactly panicking, but he was definitely worried.

I shrugged, "Fake our deaths, move, I don't know. Hadn't really thought that far ahead. We've got probably ten or so years before that's a real problem. Plenty of time to figure it out or find a cure. It's not like we don't have the resources to go completely off the grid between you and Felicity. Sam, we've lived our whole lives off the grid, this would just be more of the same."

That pissed him off, "No, it's not!"

Then it hit me, stupid of me not to think of it earlier, "Nothing says you have to leave what you've been building here tomorrow. We've got time to figure this out and I'm not saying I won't work to fix this, all I'm saying is that it seems that for once, a fucked up thing may not be all that bad. That's it. I swear."

"Sam? Dean?" Cas called out, "They're ready. I'll start getting them into my car."

"Sounds good Cas," I called back without taking my eyes off Sam, "We'll be there in a second."

"All right."

"Look, I get it, I do," I told him, "I get how the hunters have become family for you, how much time you've put into getting them to trust you, listen to you. You're freaked about what will happen if they find out, but come on man. We admitted to starting the end of the world and they still backed you, backed us. They all know shit happens, they knew we were up against something crazy. The ones that are worth knowing will stick with you."

He looked away, "Let's go help Cas."

He's not usually the one that cuts a conversation off, "Sam.."

"Later. Let's get these kids back home."

I let it go, for now. We got the kids settled into Cas' car and followed him. We stayed back once he got to the bus station, woke them up, said whatever he had to to get them on the bus and on their way home. I don't think either Sam or I really wanted to know the details. We'd had our heads messed with enough by angels, demons and witches among other things over the years to want to know all that much about what had happened. The kids were safe, at least as safe as we could make them. That was all that mattered.

Cas got back into his car once he made sure they'd gotten tickets and called home. He drove past us without a word and headed back to the Bunker. I called Coyote as we followed him home and told her the kids were fine. She said they'd narrowed down the possible culprit pictures and would have everything handled tomorrow if all went well. She was aware of the upcoming lunar cycle too and wanted to be away from the public with Cas near at hand if we wolfed out with no way to stop it.

Once the three of us got back inside I decided to just come out with it. I had a feeling that once Coyote, Roy and Oliver got back the focus would shift to other things. "Sit down you two, let's talk."

Cas gave me an odd look but did as I asked. Sam sat across from him and two sets of eyes focused on me. "Sam, you kind of already know about this, Cas listen up." I took a deep breath, "Before this whole Fenris thing happened Coyote and I had a long talk. We're basically engaged," Hadn't expected saying it to make me feel that good, but it did. "After Sam called and told us about Gordon, I made a promise to her. I said if we made it through, her and I would go on a cruise to celebrate. We both needed something good to focus on to come back to hunting, especially me."

I hadn't seen Cas smile like that in a few years, "Congratulations Dean!" He actually got up and hugged me. "You more than deserve to be happy!"

Even though Sam already knew, in a roundabout way, he still got a huge grin on his face and the sense of joy coming from him almost knocked me off my feet. "Dude, you already knew."

"No, I knew you had told her how much she meant to you, not that it was official. Wait, you have asked her right? You know how women get about guys assuming things."

"Didn't really have to ask, she was the one that called it a declaration of intent."

Sam threw his head back and laughed, "Yeah, I can see that. She's always been good at calling you out on your shit."

"One reason I love her."

"This calls for some drinks then," he said. He started to get up but I stopped him.

"Hang on." He froze midway to standing, then slowly sank back down. "I'm just going to be blunt here, Cas, you need some serious help, you're way beyond depressed and Sam? That thing you couldn't quite hide from me, we've both felt shit like that for way too long. I know it's got to hurt you on some level to see Coyote and I together.."

He looked like I'd slapped him, "Dean, no...wait a minute."

I held my hand up, "Let me finish. I know you're not jealous in that way, trust me. It's a third wheel, memories of back then and being alone here thing. You've got a lot more time to think now that I'm not around. I picked up on it way before the pack bond happened, but when I felt what you were feeling I understood it a lot better. We, all of us, need to get away from reality for a bit. Cas, starting now, and I am dead serious about this, the Bunker and Coyote's house, they are your homes. Any time you want to come see Coyote and I, you're welcome, just like Sam is. Screw Heaven, screw the angel collective. This is where you belong. This is where you've always belonged, right next to Sam and I. I want you to come on the cruise with us. She already said she's fine with it. She knows how much you mean to Sam and I."

I never thought I'd shock Cas speechless, I could have sworn there were tears in his eyes. He completely lost all that divine awkwardness and looked wholly human and stunned.

"And you," I pointed at Sam, "You need a vacation, I've had a year off and it's done me a shit ton of good. I know you've had more downtime but it's not the same as getting the hell away from everything hunting related. Plus, a lot of that downtime was you keeping an eye on me, at least it was until the last couple of months. I'm good now Sam, more than good. Thanks to you fighting for me, keeping me sane. Time to take care of yourself, so, family Alaskan cruise. Coyote and I were looking at some the other day, we'll cover it. Everyone good with that?"

If there had been crickets in the Bunker that's all I would have been hearing.


	49. How to Help an Angel

The silence lasted for probably two or three minutes. Thanks to the pack bond I could tell Sam wasn't exactly sure what to think. He was excited but kind of confused, Cas just kept staring at me.

"Cas? You okay?"

"I'm not sure what to say. This is an important event for you and...well, I'm just not sure why you wish to have me along. Not that I am not extremely grateful and overwhelmed by the offer.

Right, angels don't really have vacations, well unless you're Gabriel or Balthazar. "What you've told me over the last day or so, well, it boils down to this. You're lost Cas, you just won't admit it or maybe you don't understand what you're feeling. You've got no angels left in your life, no one that can really relate to you, understand you, Sam and I have never been angels. We don't know what you really lost when you lost your wings. I sure as hell can't comprehend that, neither can Sam." Sam's face had gone dead still when I brought that up. I doubted Cas had ever mentioned anything regarding losing his wings to Sam over the years either. "But what we can understand is being alone, losing everything, being on the outside of the world looking in. Thinking we made the right choices only to have it blow up in our faces. Those things we get in spades. I know why you're not turning off angel radio, I may not agree with it, but I won't tell you how to deal with your guilt, I'm the last person to give advice on that. What I will tell you is that dwelling on it for the rest of eternity won't help anyone, especially you. I want you to come on this cruise because in all the years we've known each other, all we've done is save the world, there's more to life than that. Hell Cas, you were here at the beginning of the it all, the world, humans, all of it. You, more than anyone, deserves to take some time off and appreciate what you've fought to save and watched over has to offer. You need to let go of the past, the angels, your bad choices. What happened, happened. I've spent most of the last year letting things go, I know it works but you can't let go of the past if you don't try something new. This cruise, it's a step in that direction. I want you there because I want to help you, plain and simple."

His mouth moved but nothing came out.

Sam's confusion had faded the more I'd talked, he got it now, got what I was trying to do. "Neither of us would still be here if it weren't for you Cas," he said, "You've lost so much helping us, things that we can never replace or fix. You're the one that needs help now, not us."

Somehow that hit him in the exact opposite way than I think Sam had planned on. That emptiness came back into his eyes, "Yes, it's not like you'll be in need of healing anymore."

"That's not what I meant," Sam stated, "And that's sure as hell not the reason we care about you."

I pulled out the chair next to Cas and got right in his face, "You are not just a tool, not for us. You're not a soldier that's only judged by how well he follows orders. You're not some divine version of a mindless robot. You're not worthless without your wings. Whatever bullshit crap you've been hearing on angel radio or when you got banished and hunted until you made it back, it's not who you are. You're your own being. Heaven exiled you, you don't owe them a damn thing anymore." I could see the objections forming in his mind, "No, uh-uh, don't even go there. You did way more good than bad. For starters, without you we never would have gotten Lucifer back in the Cage. Who the hell knows if I'd been able to stand up to Michael as long as I did without you backing me. Stop dwelling on your fuckups Cas, you're not God."

"And even he fucked up," Sam added, "You've done more to save this world than he has, if anything that makes you better than he is."

A hint of belligerence flared in Cas' eyes, which was what Sam had been aiming for.

"I am not better than God."

Sam shrugged, "You are in our book."

"That's the only book that counts," I said.

Cas switched his gaze back and forth from Sam and I for a second, then his head dropped down and he focused on the table. "Thank you." It seemed like the weight of all his billions of years of existence was pressing down on him, "I will join you." He looked up towards the door, then down the hall and finally towards the garage as if he wasn't sure what to do now.

"How about you and I go for a drive?" Sam said, "He built me this sweet ass car for my birthday. Would love to show you."

"I'd...I'd like that."

 _"He needs to think, I'll keep an eye on him."_ Sam's voice echoed through my head.

" _Sounds good. You down with coming on the cruise?"_

 _"Yes. Thanks, it means a lot and no matter what weird feelings you pick up from me, I'm happy for you. Don't ever think otherwise."_

 _"I know, and you're welcome."_

They headed out to the garage. I started walking through the place, looking at the pics Sam had hung up. There were a few of him, Thea, Felicity and Roy at what looked like a zoo, big smiles on their faces with a giraffe standing behind them. Roy was mugging for the shot, a goofy look on his face, Sam was, as usual, in the back of the group, his hand on Felicity's shoulder. He was smiling but I could see it, how much he was wishing things could be different. This whole being wolves thing would make him feel more isolated. It'd been hard enough for us to find women when we were human hunters, but now? I knew he'd already added that to the list of reasons why he felt like he was cursed. That was where that anger earlier had come from. There wasn't a lot I could do about it either, it's not like I could run a personal ad for him. I just had to find some way to try to fill the gap until he'd somehow luck out like I had. He deserved it a lot more than I did, he was the one who'd given everything up to save the world, and was willing to do it more than once. I'd just given everything up to save him.


	50. Full Moon

It was the first night of the full moon, all of us were in the main room of the Bunker along with Cas. The ghost hunt had gone smooth which had helped Oliver and Roy deal with the wolf thing, but all of us were edgy the closer to moon rise it got. Coyote had tried to get in touch with Fenris but he hadn't responded. We were sure what that meant. Her other guides were playing hard to get as well. She said she could still feel them, but she got the sense that they were waiting for something. Maybe they didn't know either, or maybe figured that this was something we'd have to go through to understand. That hadn't helped her nerves.

"Do you think it will make a difference if we're awake or not?" Sam asked.

"Don't know. Maybe. If we don't freak out a few hours in we can have Cas knock us out, I doubt we'll be able to sleep on our own."

Oliver and Roy weren't saying much, although Oliver was pacing the room while Roy fidgeted in his chair. I just poured myself another drink, held Coyote's hand, tried to keep everyone calm and waited. I wouldn't be able to stop what was coming, we just had to ride it out.

As the hours ticked by something did start to change, my senses got stronger and this overwhelming urge to go outside started taking hold. There wasn't a feel like a shift was coming on though, not yet.

-Hunt?-

It wasn't just my wolf that said that, it was a collective voice. All of us froze.

"Cas, things could be getting dicey," I said.

My adrenaline started going, the urge to move kept getting stronger and I had to stand up. It wasn't just me, Sam, Coyote and Roy all stood up with me, Oliver had never bothered to sit down.

"Try to push it back," Coyote ordered.

-Why? It's time, hunt- That was my wolf arguing with her about it, in our heads.

She snapped her head around and glared at me, "Not helping.."

I tried to reason with him -Wolf, do we have to hunt right now, can we wait? -

-Hunt!-

It tried to take control, the rest of them flinched.

-Pack, hunt- I barely recognized the voice, it had just enough of Coyote in it for me to understand that her wolf was trying to push her out of the way too.

Roy gasped, "Help...can't.." This surge of sheer need to hunt whipped through the bond, nearly taking the rest of us with him.

He dropped to his hands and knees, Oliver's face started losing form. Not good.

That's when Fenris' energy came pouring through all of us, _"Let them run, they need to feel the earth beneath their paws."_

 _"_ Will this be how it is every full moon?" Coyote demanded.

" _It will get easier over time, but for now, don't resist it."_

She was pissed, "And the reason you didn't tell us this?"

 _"You needed time to process what had happened. Go, run, they will let you guide them if you don't fight them. If they are forced to take you over, you will have no say in the hunt."_

Roy closed his eyes and his and Oliver's faces solidified back to human, I heard a whisper of Roy's voice inside my head. The pack was merging even closer together. He nodded, stood up, stripped and started to shift.

"Damn it!" Sam groaned as another new presence assaulted me. I looked over, his face and hands were contorted, caught between fighting and shifting. His wolf was almost entirely in control already, I could feel it itching to get out.

The first pains of the shift hit me, - Hunt! Dean! Now! Let us run!- I could have sworn there were claws digging at the inside of my head. I dropped to the ground.

"Do it," Coyote ordered as she ripped off her shirt, sweat beading on her forehead, "Cas, do not let us out of here unless you can tell we're not raging monsters. No matter what it takes."

That was the last thing she got out before her face distorted and she couldn't speak. I gave up at that point, slid the sweats I'd chosen to wear off and let my wolf take over.

-Thank you-

Was the first thing it said. Not what I'd been expecting as I got shoved in the passenger seat of my brain. That came in a close second in what the hell realizations to the utter calm that reverberated through the pack bond once we'd all shifted. I knew the wolves were in charge, not the humans, but they weren't acting like crazed out monsters, they were acting, well, like wolves. My head turned to look at Coyote, who stood up, shook out her fur and stared up at Cas.

"Yes? What is it?" Cas asked, in a totally normal tone of voice. Guess the sight of us shifting into wolves didn't really rank that high up on his list of weird.

She loped past him and headed up the stairs, Roy, Oliver and Sam followed, I brought up the rear, protecting the pack from any threats. It was instinctive, my wolf just did it with no thought. Once we reached the platform she peered back down at Cas, her ears straight up and every muscle in her body calm, relaxed.

"Ahh, I see. How do I know you won't go after humans? Admittedly you're calm now, but what happens once you get out? I can't exactly keep up with you."

There was this absolutely massive pull on the pack bond which sapped a ton of energy out of us. The temperature plummeted and a very faint outline of Fenris appeared in front of Cas. "I give you my word angel," his voice echoed off the walls, "They will not harm a human. My true children would never do that. Let them out." Then he faded and all of us stumbled as the sense of him disappeared as fast as it had come. I can see why he couldn't show up and kill Mairyn if that short of a time here took that much effort.

Cas was still somewhat unsure, Coyote laid down and her body language relayed to the rest of us to do the same. Five wolves laid out across the platform, waiting on an angel to let us out.

"If you were truly monsters you would be trying to break down that door," Cas stated, "I hope I am not making yet another error in judgment." He walked up the stairs, threaded his way through us and opened the door. We slowly got up, partly because we were still kind of wiped out by Fenris popping in and partly to not startle Cas and walked outside.

-Free!- My wolf said as soon as the smell of the outside air hit him. All the wolves got amped at that point, we surged up the stairs and bolted into the woods behind the Bunker. There wasn't a single hint of violence in my wolf, he was too busy enjoying running, smelling things, I was so damn confused.

-What is this? You were all fired up to hunt.- I thought to him.

-Hunt isn't just kill, this is hunt too.-

Our claws dug into the dirt, Sam's wolf hit the ground and rolled around in a nice pile of dirt, Oliver's climbed into a tree just for kicks. That was a sight to see, a wolf climbing a tree just as easily as a cat. Roy just took off at top speed and ran until he was almost out of sight, then spun around and dashed right back. Coyote hopped onto the top of a small hill, closed her eyes and raised her head towards the moon. This sense of balance echoed out from her, her and her wolf were partners at that moment. Her paws started to shuffle as she did a four footed version of the dance I'd seen her to as a human shaman. A cascade of power, her power, not her wolf's, rippled through us, bringing us all to a standstill. She was doing her shaman thing, joining with the world around her. She'd tried to describe how it felt to me several times but I could never picture it, now that I felt it, I'd never be able to understand how she ever managed to shut it off before, or why.

Every inch of my body tingled, a sense of both being completely insignificant yet incredibly important swirled within me. I felt like I was floating even though I could clearly feel the earth under my paws and I could sense lines linking every tree, rock, scrap of dirt together. Then the sense of love from beings far beyond what we were took over, her guides, had to be, or maybe her Dad and Rising Dove, maybe even Fenris was in there somewhere. I had no clue. All I knew was that whoever it was cared far more about her and I than I'd ever thought was possible from gods, guides or whatever. For once in my life I didn't feel like everything supernatural was out there trying to kill me, hated me or saw me as some sort of tool. Maybe this is what people who have faith feel, nice thing was I really didn't need to take it on empty faith anymore. It was real. Maybe this was what Cas had felt for all those billions of years when God was still around. To lose this, have it ripped from you, no wonder he was such a wreck.

That's when she howled in sheer joy, her guides were still with her. The four of us flung our heads back and howled right along with her.

A mess of memories and emotions collided together, just like when we'd fought through the walls. Oliver's pain, Roy's losses, what Sam and I had been through, Coyote's life, they all converged and our wolves absorbed them, took in the knowledge and wrapped it all together into this thing, this pack, which as I watched, became something more, something greater than all of us. Our wolves were not just separate entities within us, pack was one, pack was all, pack was a collective. They'd needed this to finish the rebirth.

We ended the howl but it echoed for several seconds afterwards, probably scaring the living crap out of anyone that happened to be near us.

-Pack!- My wolf said, excitement bursting out of him.

-Time to hunt- Coyote's wolf stated as she loped down from the hilltop, -We are ready now-

The five of us formed up and loped further into the woods.

The smell of rodents, birds, insects, small game filled my nose. Each tree had it's own scent, I could tell how long it'd been since an animal had been by based the smell. Especially when we happened across piles of shit or traces of piss. The wind shifted bringing a whole new array of scents, one of which was a rabbit which was hiding near by. I instantly crouched down.

-Food- My wolf sent out to the others. -Rabbit, may be more-

-Here too- Roy's wolf sent back.

-You get those, we'll keep going- Coyote's wolf said.

It a was a different kind of tension that filled my body, not fear, not nerves, expectation. I inched closer to the rabbit, the wind was going the right way for me, the wrong way for it. I still couldn't see it, but I could hear it breathing, it's heart beating. I'd never moved so slowly in my life. I'd always wondered how predators did it when I watched nature shows, the amount of muscle control and patience they must have had to pull that off. Now that I was one I was even more blown away. My wolf set our paw down so softly, I didn't even hear a sound. The rabbit must have moved it's head because I caught a glint of the moon off it's eyes. It had to know we were close, I mean I am all white, kind of hard not to see at night.

-It waits, it thinks I can't see it- my wolf explained. -Rabbit not used to being hunted by wolf-

It sounded kind of smug.

-It will bolt soon, then we will catch it-

It wanted the chase, which kind of struck me as cruel but better a rabbit than a person.

-I am not an it Dean, I am male. Like you. It's are things-

-Sorry, trying to keep things straight in my brain here-

-Our brain..shh-

The rabbit bolted, we took off like lightning and before I knew it hot blood was pulsing into our mouth as the wolf's teeth pierced the rabbit's neck. It screamed and he shook it rather violently till it stopped struggling, then set it on the ground and started chowing down.

Just as that happened we heard another rabbit scream and this feeling of triumph from Roy. The rest of the pack felt our successes and seemed to get a sense of satisfaction from them.

The wolf crunched through that rabbit in record time. When it, or rather he, was done he licked our paws to get the last of the blood off them and looked out into the moonlit night. -I will not cause you harm, nor cause others like you harm.- he said, -I understand now, all of us wolves do, we saw what you think we are. We are not that. Not things, we are not monsters, we help.-

-I get that, but this full moon thing, it may not always be possible to do-

I heard whispers from the others, similar words to what he was saying.

-We know now, but we need this to be able to help. Your pack, our pack, same but not same-

-Does that mean you really are separate beings inside of us?-

-Yes, we share this space with you but we are ourselves, just as you are-

I wasn't quite sure what to say to that, or think. Coyote's wolf was urging us to join her again, Roy and I moved without question to follow her request.

-Let me get this straight. You and the other wolves need this time to be together, be family, be pack? -

-Yes, when you are in control, we cannot merge with each other like this. We all came from Fenris, all part of him, separate now to be in you, need to join again for some time to be happy-

-So the feeling what each other feels when we're in human form?-

-Is for you, not us. Is part, not all, of pack.-

My head hurt.

-Our head hurts- he corrected.

-Right, sorry. Let's get to the point here. If you don't get to hunt like this, all together what happens?-

-Madness, death, pack must be together.-

-What about the other ones, the ones we sent to live with Rick?-

-They have each other, they are pack. Oliver and Roy can hunt together, you, Sam and the Alpha can hunt together, that will work. If one of you live alone and never hunt with the rest, madness for that one, and the rest may feel it-

-How about the whole living forever thing?-

I got some sort of mental shrug from him -Wolves live as long as they live-

We met back up with the others. Coyote's wolf was staring off in the distance. I smelled goats, sheep and some chickens, uh oh. There were a few houses around us with large properties that kept various livestock.

-Yeah not a good idea- I told my wolf.

His ear twitched, -Why?-

-Because then those people will try to hunt us down, if they can't find us, they'll kill whatever they can that makes sense. No need to get innocent animals killed-

My mouth started watering as the smell grew stronger, the rest of the pack stood up. -Wolf, don't do this. Please. Talk her out of it-

He was shocked at that idea -Talk Alpha out of something?-

-She's your mate too, this won't go well. I know we can't be killed all that easily but still. If you won't, let me do it.-

He thought it over, I could tell he was rummaging through my memories and thoughts. -I see, yes, not good idea. Talk to her-

Suddenly I was in charge again. Great. The pack bond seemed oddly out of synch, Coyote was talking with her wolf too, trying to reason with it. I stepped in front of her, she tried to stare me down. I had to look away but that didn't keep me from talking -Alpha, this is a bad idea. The people will try to take out whatever they think killed their livestock. I know it seems fun but we don't need to do this. There are some rabbits down the way, let's go for those.- It didn't quite seem right to call her by name. Her wolf was in charge, not her.

-Rabbits are boring- She said. I should have known Coyote's wolf would be as big on taking on challenges as she was.

I decided to use the instinctive protectiveness that came with the wolf side to make my point -How about this? Next time we can go hunt deer, go someplace far away from people. Safer for the pack. -

I wasn't sure why Coyote wasn't able to take over, maybe she was afraid if she pushed it her wolf would lose it, but her posture changed. She was thinking it over.

-We can't just scare them?-

A wolf with a sense of humor, fun -Let's just play it safe the first time out-

The other three had been watching this whole thing play out without comment, their wolves were fully in control still. They were waiting for the Alpha to decide.

-She agrees with you-

I was assuming she meant Coyote.

-Rabbits then, deer next time. Pack promise, understand?- The look she gave me made my wolf shiver. I gathered that pack promise was something along the lines of an oath you don't break, ever.

-Pack promise-

She turned away from the direction the smell was coming from -Rabbits are that way. Hunt-

I mentally breathed out a huge sigh of relief.

-Alpha listens to you, good- My wolf said, -She's very strong-

-Yeah I know. Take back over, do your thing-

He slipped up past me and took control. I spent the rest of the time sorting through the layers of connections trying to get a handle on all the wolf personalities and how they may be different from the people I knew. The more I knew, the better I could help everyone out if things got rough.

Sam's wolf seemed to be a distilled version of his analytical side. I watched as he hunted down a rabbit and I could see him thinking through all the angles the rabbit could jump, how it would move. When it finally bolted it barely got half a jump in before his jaws crunched down on it.

Roy's wolf was a ball of crazy energy, which I'd never pegged Roy for. Maybe it was a throwback to how he would have been if he hadn't had a rough life. He just loved to run, move, jump, whatever. After the first rabbit he'd caught he seemed more interested in just running around and trying to get someone to play with him than anything else.

Oliver was a whole different story. He didn't stop at one rabbit, he took out three like it was nothing.

Coyote felt like she was embodying the entire idea of being a wolf. It wasn't that she moved differently than we did, or acted more wolfy, there was just this sense about her, like this was who she was and where she was supposed to be. Not that she was half a wolf. Until I talked to her more I'd chalk it up to her heritage and shaman side.

We ran around and hunted for maybe another hour than Coyote's wolf barked once. All our wolves stopped what they were doing and gathered around her. Once we had she struck out towards the Bunker and we all glided through the woods as silent as could be.

Once the Bunker was in sight I spotted Cas standing at the edge of the wooded area.

-You take over now. Pack safe- My wolf said as it faded back into the corners of my brain.

"I was getting concerned," Cas said as we loped into view. He gave us one of his intense angel stares. "I am starting to figure out how to decipher who is in charge. It appears that you are, not your wolves. Good. I'll open the door. I set your clothes in your rooms. I thought you may prefer that."

We worked our way down the stairs and headed straight to our rooms. There were all kinds of thoughts and feelings flying around the bond and we all wanted to be back on two legs again before we started talking. I got why Fenris had held off telling us, there was no way he could explain what we'd just gone through that would make any sort of sense.

Coyote shifted fast, a lot faster than she ever had before. I wasn't too far behind her and it felt good to be alone, mostly, in my head again. It also seemed to hurt much less than before. "That was fucking intense," I said as she wrapped her arms around me.

"Holy shit," she breathed out as I squeezed her as tight as I could. "That was so far beyond anything that I thought was possible. We were really wolves, I can't believe it."

"This I can deal with, they aren't out to go ballistic and kill people. Damn, I never thought I'd see the day, something like this doesn't have a nasty ass downside for once."

She leaned back and looked into my eyes, "Guess we should book that cruise now huh?"

"Oh god yeah." When our lips met, I couldn't tell where mine ended and hers started, and I really, really liked that.


	51. The Gift - End

I'd never seen so much food in my life, even with our new wolf inspired appetites I managed to stuff myself silly the first day of the cruise. The second day I dialed it back, mainly because it turns out I get mildly seasick in rougher waters. Not the most pleasurable experience but the third day the weather calmed back down again, which helped. We'd flown up to Alaska instead of driving, I had Cas knock me out before we even hit the runway. Best flight I'd ever been on, I didn't remember a damn thing about it.

It was about two months after the first full moon we'd had as wolves. That night had been a long one. Once Coyote and I had gotten back out to the main room the first thing we'd seen was Oliver.

He was dressed but just standing there staring at his hands. "I can use this...channel things into it...balance..." he muttered.

Roy joined us a few minutes later and he was just as bewildered but excited as Coyote had been, "That was amazing!"

When Sam came in it was obvious that he was relieved as I was that we weren't home to rabid monsters. We spent the rest of the night talking, explaining things to Cas, figuring out what it had all meant and in general feeling pretty fucking lucky that we'd made it through without losing ourselves. The next full moon I'd kept my pack promise and all of us went to a wilderness area where I knew deer hunters liked to go. Once we got there we shifted and took down a huge deer. There was this indefinable sense of freedom when we were hunting. When it was over the wolves, just like before, let us take control back and go back to living our lives. In between there Sam and I had decided to hang out with Oliver and Roy in Starling, just to make sure they'd be all right while Coyote went back home for a bit and tried to work things out with the tribe. Oliver's crew had taken this turn of events pretty well. Felicity and Thea just rolled right with it, so did Dig. Laurel, who really freaked me out when I first saw her even after Sam's warning, frigging carbon copy of Ruby, took some time to adjust but in the end she saw the advantages to it. After three weeks in Starling I felt pretty safe leaving Roy and Oliver on their own, Sam decided to stay though. I think he was still worried about being around hunters. I went back home and settled down again. Coyote had chosen not to take her old position back, she said it never really suited her anyway and Cougar was doing a much better job getting things done on the council than she ever had. He wasn't as polarizing of a person as she'd been. She still helped out, healed people, did what a shaman would as far as the spiritual side of things, she just wasn't in charge and she was fine with that.

All in all the hardest thing about the last two months was keeping her from finding out what I'd had made for her. My wolf really didn't like the idea of keeping secrets even though I'd explained over and over it was a good thing that she'd be happy in the end, he saw it as lying to the Alpha. He almost ruined it on the last hunt but thankfully got distracted by the deer and forgot about it. By the time he remembered I was already back in the driver's seat so I could keep him from spilling the beans. He pouted about that. Fortunately I'd had years of keeping secrets under my belt so I could keep my feelings about it buried enough that it didn't really show up in the bond, well that and I'd learned how to block things off from the rest of the pack. Coyote's and my wolves had been kind enough to explain that after the night of the first hunt when her and I decided to celebrate how well things had turned out.

-Pack doesn't need to know everything- Coyote's wolf had said, then promptly tweaked the bond so that the rest of them wouldn't feel what was going on. Thank God.

I hadn't been all that prepared for just how big a cruise ship was and all the things you could do on it. It was basically a floating city and had everything from a rock climbing gym to scrapbooking classes on it. Sam and I made a whole list of things we wanted to do, hell it was all included in the price so why not. Coyote had her own list, a lot of which was massages, spa days and all that. There's no real place to do all that on the Reservation and back when she was still living off it and in big city she'd gotten in the habit of spoiling herself every now and again. I think she'd decided to make up for the last few years of Reservation life during the seven days on the ship. Cas, well, he had no real idea what to do while we were planning. So Sam and I ended up dragging him along on the things we wanted to do, some of which got derailed for me when I got sick. However, my secret plan wasn't. Thankfully.

We'd all, even Cas, had been awestruck by the scenery, the glaciers, the whales, all of it. Sam and I had never hunted in Alaska so had never set foot inside the state, neither had Coyote. Cas had been there several times over the past billion years but he'd always been fighting something or following orders, he'd never had time or really been allowed to enjoy it.

The first night it was half moon, which usually isn't all that bright. However, moonlight shining off water and glaciers is plenty bright enough. Coyote and I had booked all of us rooms with balconies. Sam and Cas shared one and her and I were sharing the other. Ours were basically overlooking the bow so the view was amazing and the four of us spent that first night just staring at the water and glaciers, barely talking at all. We'd even caught sight of some whales doing whale things out in the distance . Oddly I think of all of us Cas was the one most affected by it. He'd spent the last two months alternating between staying with Sam or Coyote and I. Unlike his usual pattern of helping with something then leaving to do whatever he felt he had to, he'd stayed close. Every few days either he'd open up and talk to whichever one of us he was staying with. We wouldn't talk about saving the world or hunts, we'd talk about him, his life. I realized pretty fast that Cas and I could easily spend the next hundred years talking and still wouldn't even scratch the surface of his life. At first Coyote sat in on the conversations but then one night she told me that she felt that Cas would open up more if she wasn't around.

I didn't quite understand why at first, which was when she explained something that had never really occurred to me, "He doesn't really know me Babe. What he wants to tell you are things he's never told another living soul, probably not even his fellow angels. He's delving into all the things that he was punished for, the things that made him different. That's scaring the hell out of him. Trust me, he'll open up more if I'm elsewhere."

She, as usual, was right. The first conversation we had when she decided she was "exhausted" and went to bed early he brought up things that he'd probably be executed by another angel for if he had ever admitted to thinking that way. As the weeks went on he changed. He was in fewer and fewer funks, started to smile a lot more and in general seemed excited by the world around him in ways I'd only seen when he'd first gone full mortal and still had some sense of hope. Sam told me that the two of them were having similar conversations and he was seeing the same changes.

By the time we left for the cruise it'd become something he was really looking forward to. That first night when we were watching the ocean and glaciers slide by his reactions to them were a lot closer to someone seeing them for the first time than an angel who'd been around the planet and other worlds plenty of times over his life.

He pointed towards the top of a glacier, "I remember standing there, or close to there since glaciers can move," he said in a hushed voice several hours into the night, "Michael and I had just struck down several higher ranking demons who had launched an attack against us. We were supposed to immediately return to Heaven. I was, as I am now, fascinated by the beauty that was around me. He said that it was not our place to enjoy what Father had made, that was for Father's creations to do. We were here only to protect and destroy any evil that encroached upon it. I remember thinking; how can we protect something we cannot love." His hand tightened into a fist for a second then he relaxed, "He heard my thought and stated that way of thinking was what had destroyed Lucifer and to guard myself against such things. Then he grabbed my arm and dragged me back to Heaven. I wasn't allowed to visit here again for quite some time."

Over the past few months of listening to Cas I'd long since decided that God's worst sin was how he'd treated his angels. I couldn't really blame them for being dicks, that was the only way they knew how to act.

"Well, take all the time you want to enjoy them now," Sam said. "None of us will stop you."

"Yes, I know you won't," Cas replied with a smile.

The rest of the night passed with hardly another word being spoken. When it got too late and the three of us decided to get some sleep, he'd stayed right there. When we woke up later he showed us a video he'd taken of the sunrise. I caught him looking at it a few times throughout the day. I don't think it was the fact that it was a sunrise that had him so hooked on it, it was the fact that it was most likely the first sunrise he'd ever enjoyed without feeling nervous about enjoying it. As far as I knew he still had angel radio turned on, but he didn't seem to give a shit about what the other angels thought or said anymore. It was more than past time for him to feel that way as far as I was concerned.

He'd tried to make my seasickness go away the next day when we hit rougher weather, it never managed to stay gone though so I finally told him to quit trying. I'd rather just keep feeling sick then go through feeling fine and then getting sick again. The seasick pills they had on board didn't seem to help either so I just gave up, camped out in the room and relaxed. The rest of them checked in on me throughout the day but I didn't mind watching the view in between feeling nauseous.

Day three was the day I'd planned to give Coyote what I'd had made for her. When I woke up in the morning and saw that the water was calm again I started getting nervous, which was stupid so I buried it, pulled her close and slid my hand down her side.

She rubbed up against me and moaned, "Guess you're feeling better."

"Mm-hmm," I couldn't really talk, I was too busy kissing her neck. I'd woken up ready to go. We were on a huge bed covered with silky sheets and the sound of the ocean filling the room. The sun was at the perfect angle to shine off her skin and make her hair glisten like obsidian. I couldn't have asked for a better start to the day. My hand moved down lower without any conscious direction on my part. Turns out I wasn't the only one who'd woken up in a good mood, if how warm and moist she was already was any indication. Far be it from me to not dive headlong into that situation.

I entertained myself and her with some new variations on things I knew she loved that I'd thought of. Her moans became higher pitched cries in near record time. Women always seem to get off faster in the mornings, course so do guys I guess. Hot sex has always been my preferred way to wake up. I held off though and switched things up on her. I pushed her face down on the bed, moved her hair out of the way and started rubbing her back.

"This is new..." she murmured.

"Well, I can't let those massage people have all the fun." I'd spent some of the prior day on the net researching massage techniques. She'd never really expressed interest in massages before and I'd never had one for a multitude of reasons, but I never pass up a chance to learn something new. Especially something that can make her happy.

I barely heard the next part because she'd completely relaxed and was barely whispering, "Not complaining, not in the least."

"Guess I'm doing it right."

"Babe, you've never done anything sex related wrong that I can remember."

I leaned forward and kissed her right in between the shoulder blades. I felt the shiver that ran down her spine, "Practice makes perfect."

"Well keep practicing..."

"Got it."

The first few times we'd had sex after the wolf thing happened had been an eye opening experience, mainly because we were hooked together so tightly due to the bond that we literally felt everything the other one felt. The first time it happened we were almost sick because of the intensity of the experience. We'd worked out the kinks and managed to dial back the connection enough to where that didn't happen but it had taught me a few things that I wouldn't have known otherwise, same with her. We'd both used that knowledge to it's fullest extent since then. I had thought sex with her was amazing before that, I'd had no idea how much better it could be. There was no way in hell I could ever tire of it now.

I worked out all the tight spots I could find, pretty much reducing her to a moaning puddle of goo, which had been the plan, then picked the pace back up. I went from gently kissing her to light bites and digging my fingers into her hips and thighs.

"Holy shit," she hissed as she arched up and balled the sheets up in her hands.

Another thing I'd picked up over the last few months was how to growl when I wanted to, not just when the wolf was trying to take over and protect me. I took hold of her hips, got right next to her ear and growled, "My turn..."

"Fuck yes!"

In a second I'd flipped her over and drove deep down inside her. That wrenched a growl from her, which was just as fucking hot for me as my growling was for her. She gripped me so tight with her legs that I almost couldn't breathe, shot up off the bed and got her nails deep into my back. It took everything I had not to actually howl at that point, that wouldn't have gone over well. In between her ever faster breaths she was mumbling in Lakota, which I'd learned meant that she was more than enjoying what was going on. She was still not quite ready to come again though so I forced myself to wait as long as I could. When she stopped talking and was just whimpering that was when I brought everything to a screeching halt while being pushed in as far as I could go.

She stopped breathing and gripped me tighter so I couldn't breathe. I held her there for a second then moved again, that did it for both of us.

"Oh god, oh god..." she whispered into my ear over and over as we rode it out.

When I could finally think again I couldn't quite talk at first, I was too busy trying to catch my breath. "Think you can loosen that grip a bit?" I managed to squeak. She's got some damn strong legs.

"Huh? What?"

I must of done a damn good job to get her that flustered. "Can't breathe, legs..."

"Oh..."

She let go. I took a deep breath, kissed her forehead and enjoyed the view. She was sweaty, breathing hard, her eyes were closed, mouth wide open and shudders were running all along her body. Yup, best way to start the morning ever. "Morning darlin' "

"Can't think...brain mush."

"Guess my job here is done." I moved like I was about to slide out of bed but she grabbed my arm and pulled me towards her.

"Fuck you..." she grumbled.

"Didn't you just do that?"

She wrapped her other arm around my chest and shook her head as I laid back down, "No, I mean yes, damn it! You're not going anywhere."

"I can't really disobey my Alpha can I?" I'd had fun throwing that at her now and again, usually when she was being extra snarky. She usually rolled her eyes and threw her hands up when I did.

"Exactly. My pack, my rules." Apparently she'd just been waiting for the right moment to pull rank, not that I minded.

We laid there for a few more minutes but it was morning, "All right, move," she said. I got up and she stumbled into the bathroom. I went in and took a shower as soon as she came out.

"Guess I won't need that massage this morning," she said as we started getting dressed.

"Nah, I don't think you can ever have too many massages. Go have fun, get spoiled. I'll see you later. Sam, Cas and I are going to tackle that pro-level rock wall. Looks like fun."

She laughed, "Who knew you guys would like climbing things so much?"

"It's challenging, and not in the find out the answer or the world will end kind of way."

"All right, spa day number two it is."

She'd climbed the first rock wall with us and had a blast doing it, but she was getting more of a kick out of being pampered than anything else.

We got breakfast, she headed off to the spa part of the ship and I snuck off to prep the rest of my surprise for her. I'd even managed to keep Sam and Cas in the dark. I went and bought the high end wine that I knew she liked, had them hold it for me to be delivered at a certain time and place. Then I reserved this out of the way secluded honeymooners hideaway that the ship offered. I'd gotten lucky that no one else had snagged it. I didn't want to do it when I booked the cruise because she'd see it on the invoice. I figured that if it wasn't available I'd just carry out my plan in our room but this was a lot better of set up. They'd made it look like a garden, it had a hammock, fire pit, a little canopy area with a low table and some pillows around it and was stuck on the side of the ship so the view made you feel like you were just floating over the ocean. After I secured all that I went out, climbed the wall with Sam and Cas then texted Coyote to meet me in the cafe that just happened to be right near the honeymoon thing.

"Hey guys, after we all clean up, I want you to meet me here." I told Sam and Cas as I pointed to the cafe on one of the big wall maps they had all over the place. "Don't take too long either." She'd texted back that she'd be done in about thirty minutes. Barely enough time for me to run up, shower, grab what I had for her and get back.

My hold on my nerves was starting to crack and Sam sensed it, "What's going on?"

"Just meet me there. Move." I hustled down the halls, took a fast shower, grabbed one of the nicer shirts she'd bought for me, a pair of jeans and the gift, got dressed and bolted to the cafe. I barely beat her there. Sam and Cas came walking up from the other direction just as she gave me a quick kiss.

"Doing lunch here?" She asked.

I'd already taken care of that too, I'd ordered some food when I reserved the spot. "No, I took care of that. Everyone follow me." I took her hand and led the way.

We turned down the hall towards the hideaway and she saw the signs on the wall, "Babe? What's this?"

"You'll see."

I opened the door and saw the wine, four glasses and a tray of food with plates set up on the table under the canopy. Perfect timing. "Cool place huh?" I was still trying to play it off as some random thing I was doing but neither she or Sam were buying it anymore. If the looks on their faces weren't enough, the mix of curiosity, building excitement and a tad of disbelief I was feeling through the pack bond sealed the deal.

"Dean? Sure you want Cas and I here?" Sam asked.

"Yup, sit, all of you."

They sat down, I poured the wine and that's when my hands started shaking.I took a long swallow, it was damn good wine and took a look around. I'd worked out a few things I wanted to say but now that the moment was here something else entirely started coming out of my mouth.

"Coyote, one of the reasons it took me so long to see you again after I got back from Hell was I felt like I wasn't the man you thought I was. You'd told me I'd never become a demon because no one who loved someone as much as I loved Sam would ever turn into something like that." I had no idea why I was saying this, but it felt right, felt like I had to. It also was something I'd never told anyone, even her. It was something I'd buried and tried to forget but it came roaring back as I looked at how perfect she was right then.

She was wearing loose, brown linen pants, a sleeveless shirt that had an intricate pattern beaded into it, open toed, lace up sandals and her hair cascaded down her chest and sides. Her eyes that she always thought were too large for her face were filled with life and happy, the angles of her cheeks had never needed any highlighting to make them stand out. She was beyond gorgeous, always had been.

I almost lost my train of thought as I stared at her, "But I broke, I gave in, I became something evil."

All three of them had gone from anticipating something great to worried, "What's bringing.." she started to ask but I stopped her.

"I'll get there, trust me. After Cas pulled me out and I found out what I had done, what I had caused, it made me doubt everything. Those few days with you after the sweat, I'd clung to them so hard in the Pit. Tried to use them to keep me strong." This was not at all what I'd wanted to feel right then, but I kept going, "Actually all the days we'd spent together. Every time Alastair showed up..." I stopped myself, too many memories were crowding in on me. I poured some more wine, downed it and tried to keep going. Sam started to get up, but I shook my head, "No, don't, let me get through this."

"All right," he sat back down but didn't relax, instead he and Coyote started pushing calm towards me through the bond.

"Anyway, after I caved, took that blade from him and started cutting into souls I gave up on everything. That's what happens when you turn into a demon, you give up on hope, love, life and give into the feeling that you're worthless, that any and all good you've ever done didn't mean shit. Then you turn that gaping hole of hate on others. When Cas saved me, he pulled me out, but that didn't make the hate go away. I just turned it on myself. That's why I kept running from what I told you in that note I left. I gave up, but you never did."

I dug into my pocket and pulled out the box. The minute she saw it the calm she'd been pushing at me turned into something that ran so deep it pulled me under and I had to fight to keep myself standing.

"This isn't about asking, because you said yes the night you sweated for hours to help the Spirits reach me, then sang to me, even though your throat was on fire, to pull me back from those visions, you said yes every time you chose to meet me after I told you about what I unleashed, you said yes when you took on the burden of my nightmares without once ever telling me what it was doing to you. You said yes when you let me move in. This is about me not running anymore, about trying to be what you told me I was all those years ago, what you brought out in me, even if it was only for a few days. This is about being the man you had faith in, even after everything he'd done."

I opened the lid of the box, there was two rings. I'd had a hunter friend who was also a master silversmith make them. They were solid silver and heavy, engraved on them was the image of a coyote and wolf facing each other, necks crossed with a line of amethyst running around their necks, joining them. The coyote had obsidian eyes and the wolf had a dark green tiny piece of jade for eyes, written inside the band of mine was "Aeternus", which was Latin for eternal, without beginning or end, even beyond time and inside hers was "Cantkiya" Lakota for love.

She didn't say a word. Instead she reached out, slowly took her ring out of the box and slid it on. Then she took the box from my hand, pulled out my ring, held my hand and placed it on my finger. Still without a word she stood up, put her arms around me and whispered, "Dean, you never gave up and you've always been the man I've seen. If you hadn't been, I wouldn't have said yes all those times."

"Thank you for all those times, every single one. I love you, always have, always will."

About thirty seconds later Sam proceeded to try to break both our ribs with a hug, this rush of joy flooded the pack bond and our phones started going off, had to be Oliver and Roy. I barely heard the rings through the intense, inner howling that was echoing through my head.

-Pack happy!- My wolf said.

I looked over Sam and Coyote's shoulders at Cas. He hadn't moved, but he was smiling. He met my eyes, nodded and said, "Angels and God, we don't save humans, love does."

Over a year ago I'd been holding a knife to Sam's neck, in the grips of a cursed object and fighting to find a reason to live. Now all I wanted to do was be alive, be with her and enjoy every second of it. I'd finally done a second chance right. Damn did it feel good.

-End


End file.
